PMSL, Fiona, at borrowing someone's perineum! LOL, at least that way if you do tear you can have your own in-tact one back afterwards!
I was really panicky about having a tear or epi when I was pg. It scared me more than anything. I only did peri massage once, tho, because I laziness won out over fear
I had a 2nd degree tear and TBH it caused me no grief at all, besides being a little bit itchy when it was healing.
All the best for the last couple of weeks of your pg and for the birth.