I was just wondering, after reading many many birth stories i have noticed that many women had more than one support person at their birth, like mothers and sisters and SIL's. I was only planning on having DH there as i can sometimes butt heads with people in my family and i didn't want too many people there talking and breaking my concentration etc. That, and i think that it is a very private moment for me and DH to welcome our son into the world and we didn't really want to share it with anyone else.
Have i made a mistake? Or have you done it with just your partner and felt it was the better choice?
If you're comfortable with one, go with one! If you want fifteen... check with your hospital/midwife first, but if they're okay with it, go with fifteen! If you want to give birth by yourself, by god, do it yourself!
...Okay, my point is, whatever makes you feel most comfortable is right for you Don't give in to people bullying you to let them be there, and don't think you're not "normal" for only wanting your hubby to be there - there is no such thing as normal
I think if you only want your DH there then go for it, you have to do what you feel comfortable with. What works for some might not be the best for you, especially if you butt heads with your family in day to day life.
I had my Mum and DP there, although my Mum was vomiting in the shower almost the whole time so didnt really end up being much support.
I only had my DH there, plus my midwife.
This was enough for me - DH was so awesome I hardly even noticed the midwife!!
I think it's a very personal choice. You need to have people with you who are going to be a support to you.
My birth team was my Doula, my DH and my Mum. It was a fantastic choice and my hubby wanted to do it the same this third time around. Having a few people gives them each a bit of a break without leaving you on your own - they can tag team with the massage and support! I had my hubby cos, well, he's my hubby! I had my doula as I wanted her knowledge and backup (as I had a VBac last time). THis time my DH said that we definately had to have a doula again and I agreed as she was soooo helpful. I had my Mum as it's always good to have your mum around when you are in pain!
You definatley only want a birth team that you feel comfortable with though.
I only had DH, and will only have him (and the midwives obviously) for next time as well. I personally find it such a big thing emotionally that I kind of can't share it with anyone else, which probably doesn't make sense, I guess it's kind of like I don't want to have to explain anything to other people. If DH wasn't able to be there for some reason, then I'd have my mum, but only as a backup option, even though I think she'd be great in the circumstances.
But it's like a lot of stuff - there's no right or wrong, what's important to you is what matters. As the other posters have said.
For my first I had DH and SIL there. Mostly because I didn't know how long it would take and was worried about being on my own if he needed a break or a sleep IYKWIM. I really didn't notice anyone once I was in the zone
I had my mum, XP & a friend at my first birth, DH & a friend for DS1, DS2 & DD2.
The advantage of having someone else there (this is just for us ) is that they are support for your DH as well. As Carrie said, they can tag-team with massage & support. For me it meant I was never on my own, even when DH did have to go to the toilet, get a coffee, etc. and that was how I wanted it.
The most important thing is that you are both comfortable with who you have there. Both DH & I would rather not have anyone else there if it's not the right person, IYKWIM? And we considered the fact too that some people who are great company in everyday situations might become a bit grating in a delivery room. We chose carefully
With DD1 i had planned for DP, my mum, my MIL and my stepmum to be there, only 2 were allowed in at a time so they could alternate and there would be someone there to keep DP occupied... in the end i had DD1 at home by myself breach on the bathroom floor so NO-ONE not even DP got to be there.
With DD2 i just decided not to even invite anyone, they didn't get time to show the first time and it might be nice for DP to get to be there alone for this one.
I had quite a quick labor in which he sat down and read the paper most of the time but i found he was all the support i needed as the MW were awesome and very comforting.
You need to go with what makes you comfortable, ask your DH if he thinks he will need someone else if it's a long labor etc but ultimately you need to be comfortable.
i just had DH with me for my labour, as well as a midwife (and a student doctor sitting in the back ground too) but thats what i wanted. i too butt heads with family members and i wanted to be 'in control' as much as one can be whilest in labour! you're not being selfish at all. your body, your birth your choice.
I had DH there both times. I also had Mum with DD1 and a good friend of mine with DD2.
The reason I chose to have someone else with me, was simply because DH can not handle me being in pain, he can not focus on what I want. He just wants to 'fix it'.
With DD1 I was induced, and had my Mum there for her first grandchilds birth but also to support DH, he is a sook
With DD2 I wanted a no drugs birth, so I knew I needed someone who would be there for ME, and keep me focussed to get the birth I wanted.
support people in labour?
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Don't give in to people bullying you to let them be there, and don't think you're not "normal" for only wanting your hubby to be there - there is no such thing as normal 
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