Jessica - If you want an epi, you may have to be very persistent in asking for it. MW can be a bit funny about epi's. In my last labour I just repeatedly asked for it over and over again until they agreed. My first labour, the put me off for 4 hours (and then it was another 2 hours till the anaesthetist got there).
You may even completely surprise yourself and cope way better with the pain than you thought you would. I have friends who thought they would need an epi and found labour not as bad as they thought. Me, on the other hand, I was dead set on natural labour with no drugs and when it came down to it I was so tired I couldn't do it anymore. I think it was partly because I was not overly prepared for what was going to happen (the first time) and the second time I was induced and that is a whole other story.
Im not going to lie. Labour is excruciating. But hay.. who cares. Its a pain u do forget and i just kept telling myself, it wont last forever. When it comes to labour.. expect the unexpected. U may want an epi but they might not do one if u are too close to bub being born. Personally i thought the epi hurt abit more than the labour!!!!
Mine ended in an emergency c/section. So i was unable to walk or move real weel for the first week but that didnt stop me focusing 100% on my baby. Its what i had to do, and i didnt even think about the pain really.
I dont think anyone is really ever "ready" for labour. Its like saying.. hay are u ready to come get your arm chopped off. But its just another thing us wonderful woman have to suck up and hope and pray that just someday our husbands get to experience some sort of the same pain. When DP gets sick now and is like... oh im so sore.. im sick yadda yadda yadda.. i just have a little chuckle in my head. He has no idea what pain is.
You have to remember, we are built for this. We are meant to go through labour and birth.
As much as it hurts... it is ab****ley awsome when they pass that baby to you that u grew inside u. Such a surreal feeling
Hello! I have to agree with Tattoo_mama when she says not to go in with concrete expectations and plans. Child birth is a grey area that no-one can predict how it will progress and what you will feel. Going in with an exact plan, in my opinion, is a sure way to make things worse and increase anxiety.
With my first labour I went into my labour with an open mind but well educated. If I needed pain relief then I needed it...amazingly I didn't use pain relief...that's not to say it was easy or painless...it was painful...but I think your mental state has a huge impact on how you cope with the pain. I remember during transition feeling completely out of control, I was hysterical, I wanted to make it all stop and leave and I wanted everyone to leave me alone. I asked for Pethidine and was told that I couldn't as I was too far along..this was all I needed and I snapped out of it and focused on the fact that I wasn't that far off meeting my beautiful baby...it was purely psychological but my goodness I felt out of control and until I could gain control of my mind everything else was going crazy as well. Don't get me wrong..I am not saying that it is mind over matter for everything, but I just remember that particular part of my first labour so vividly and remember it was a huge thing to overcome that.
Researching non medication pain reliefs is definitely a good idea and as mentioned will help you during those hours when medication may not be available. Movement worked for me and then when I was becoming more tired as labour progressed the shower was my best friend.I spent 3 hours in the shower with the water running on my back and head..I was sitting on a fit ball..it was relaxing and quiet (the sound of the running water helped) and the water was wonderfully soothing.
Practicing breathing techniques is a good idea...I didn't with my first labour and initially I thought I was going to pass out from hyperventilation, then the nurse told me to moan whilst I breathed as you don't exhale so fast is you are using your vocal cords..and although initially i felt stupid moaning and making noises (like an animal lol) eventually I didn't even care because it worked and that's all that mattered.
Hopefully you have helpful midwives that can suggest things to help..my midwives were great and I am going to try to take their advice from last time into this labour...but I am still going to go in with an open mind...what ever I need to get me and the baby through it safely is how it will be. If I need the drugs this time..then so be it..doesn't mean anything other than this labour was different to last time.
As for me...I must admit I am a little more scared this time than last time. Sounds silly but now I know...and it's not that what I know was bad...in fact my labour with my daughter was wonderful (I would rather do labour than pregnancy!)... my fear is that things can only go down!! I'm scared I'll tear..which I didn't last time...that i'll freak out etc. I am working hard to put these thoughts out of my head as everyone keeps saying if you did it ok first time then chances are you'll do it ok second time. I hope so! My focus when in labour is that the pain is not a 'bad' pain...it's not like a broken leg or amputated limb etc..this pain is so that my baby can come out..and that is a good thing...its not an unknown pain, does that make sense? I know what i'm trying to say just not sure it is coming across well!
Education and an open mind is the best way to approach labour...what is going to happen will happen, and luckily at the end of it all..be it a few hours or a day etc...you will meet your gorgeous baby and a few months later you will forget how fearful you were because you will be so overwhelmed by your child. Good luck with everything, you will do well (afterall..if it was THAT bad..why do we go and do it again..and for some people again and again and again lol)!
Just remember... women have been having babies for thousands of years!! Many also did it drug free before birth became "medical" like it is today. Now there is nothing wrong with having drugs for pain relief if you need it... everyone has different pain thresholds but if you do want a drug free birth then believe in yourself that you can do it. Trust your body and trust your baby.
I had a drug free (no gas) natural labour and birth (she was posterior too!!) and I believe that my mindset I was in really helped to achieve the birth I desired. Be strong and confident and trust yourself.
If you have too much fear, it can make the pain worse.... iykwim? Don't let the fear overwhelm you. let go of any fears you have and go in open-minded
And EMBRACE the pain you feel.... it's all GOOD pain... after all, you're about to meet your baby... it's worth it
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