why do ppl think they know it all!!

[CinderToriella]

Sorry im just really mad atm

im 28 weeks i had another MW appoitmnet on the weekend .

she measured my belly and i am spot on at 28 cm, so our little girl is growing spot on as far as my MW was concered

but yet i get to work today all happy that we are on track for a healthy little baby and i get two fidd women say to me

''oh ur gonna have a big baby look at ur belly'' !!! WHAT THE

i was like umm huh lol ans they were like yeah well when i was pregnant i was carrying low and i was smaller than u at this stage ''and oh look at so and so when she was pregnant she had a small belly and was smaller than u and she had a small baby

why why do ppl do this ? why do they think they know it all and have a right to comment .

im feeling bad about myselgf now i thought my belly was normal like depending on what i wear u cant always tell straight away that im pregnant , but now im feeling i dunnu weird and funny about it all and not happy

i mean we had one lady here she was huge huge huge and she had a 3.6 i think it was bub so u cant tell can u?

if i do have a big baby then so be it i will love her just the same

in your opinion can u tell the size of a persons baby by the size of her belly?

thanks for the vent

[Stevie]

dont listen to them,
everyone is different.
When i was pg, i was pretty small, noone asked if i was pg until i was bout 30 weeks, dependingon if i wore something really tight. i thought i was going to have a small baby, she was 7p8oz, thats not really a small baby...
and i always measured spot on too, so you cant tell.

[Tiff+2]

I had some people tell me I was tiny and others say I was huge with DD... I was even asked if I was having twins I measured either spot on or slightly smaller at all of my appontments.... Some people just have to have a say and the stupid thing is the size of your belly doesn't particullay determin the size of your bub, sometimes you can be small but still have a big bub as it can sit in your back etc.

Brush it off hun, you'll get people making stupid comments right through your preg. Some people have no idea how rude and hurtful their comments can be.

[Visitor7]

Yeah, don't listen to them. I had a big belly with Nina, and she was only 2.98kg. I had a smaller belly with Emily and she was 3.65kg. It depends on how much fluid you're carrying, how much extra kg you've put on etc. Just nod and agree and ignore them.

[sas85]

No you can't tell, and people should shut-up. Your MW is checking your fundal height, that is the best way of telling growth - everyone else is just observing how much you're poking out compared to other people they 'think' were at the same stage, which has nothing to do with anything and can vary based on your tummy muscles, your height, how much fluid you're carrying, you're frame etc. Some women with smaller tummies have big bub's and some who are very large have small/average size bubs so it's hardly a good indicator of anything.

I don't know why people think it's ok to comment on your tummy size when you're pregnant it's just as hurtful as commenting on your weight when you're not pregnant. People were constantly commenting on how 'small' I was and that made me feel really bad, and one of my g/f's pregnant with her second is carrying much larger this time and people keep commenting on how 'big' she is and 'are you sure you're not having twins' which is, hurtful to say the least. Pfft to them all. Your belly is growing and is beautiful, try not to let people's insensitivity upset you.

[Jas]

blrgh! I HATE ideas like that! How a woman carries depends on so many things, how much amniotic fluid there is, the position of the baby, the size of the baby, the time of day (i.e have you just eaten a big lunch?) oh and one other thing, the woman the belly is attached to!! Some woman pop out so quick and then only grow a tiny bit others hardly look preg and then bang, in fact I have a friend who has recently had her 5th child and I swear at 34weeks u wouldn't automatically be able to tell she was preg and she is a thin woman then bang by term she had a big bump

Nope you can't tell, especially when this is your first baby, its not like you are 3 timesthe size u were last time and so they can say, oh well this one muct be bigger etc

These woman don't know the facts and r probably just trying to be nice and have a conversation as annoying and frustrating comments like this can be sometimes u just have to smile and nod or just say something like, "well a qualified sonographer can't even get an accurate size estimation when they can actually see the baby, so I guess we will know how big he/she is when he/she is born, also I am measuring right on me dates"

You are growing what I am sure will be a beautiful baby and he or she is the perfect size for him or her whether that is 6lb or 9lbs. You are doing wonderfully and I think you should be proud of your bump big, small, whatever shape or high or low, thats another one I really dislike, ppl telling you oh u haven't dropped yet still ages when u r already overdue! What would they know I still hadn't dropped the day Sence was born

[CinderToriella]

Thanks guys

Im so glad that you all agree with me and see how bad it is .

a few weeks ago or so i was getting told 'where is ur belly' blah b;ah and now that iv had a growth obviously im getting told im big what the?

ppl really shouldnt say stuff like that it really is upsetting and hurtful

if she is big then i dont care i will love her just as much as i would no matter what size she is , but no one knows how she will be untill they are born.

ill try and just brush it off but its annoying

[barney]

hunny i have an aunt like this she thinks she knows bloody everything and i cant stand her shes always says lately to me ..oh wow you werent this big with the other girls .."im like you wouldnt even no lady as youve never seen me pregnant bfore" then she will say "oh but you no were as big as i get " WHO THE F##K CARES.
hang in there sweets and just dont listen or it can drive you mad sometime i just wanna smak this BIATCH lol..

[HotI]

I had some people tell me I was tiny and others say I was huge with DD...

I have had the same thing. One person said i am huge, and then 10 minutes later a different person said that i don't even look pregnant.

neh!

[ladybird11]

It must be the mum in us that always seems to come out and recall the days when we were PG lol.

I've never made comment on someones belly size unless they seemed stressed that bubs is measuring too big and they ask my opinion - it happened to me and I just relay my experience as bubs came out a healthy size in the end.

But yes, get used to the opinions - they'll go right thru from conception until the baby is walking down the aisle and getting married lol!!! And on and on and on !

[Linzy]

Oh I know what you mean! The best way to get all the advice you NEVER asked for is to become pregnant or build a house. Some of the comments really get me mad, but it will never change, people will always make comments. I wonder if I will when my daughter has a baby?

I find the older mums like 50 years plus are the worst. Especially with their out of date advice, telling me all sorts of weird and whacky things. Lol, they mean well I guess.

The one thing I have noticed this pregnancy (its a girl this time) is that I have lost alot of weight in my face which is always thin, but now my cheekbones are like razors. Not one SINGLE 'Oh your glowing comment' this pregnancy I did with my son because I was a bit puffier in the face. But I was really looking forward to 'glowing' this pregnancy, but oh nooo I look like I've just given birth after 36 hours of labour!

When people say you look so big, tell em 'Well, she/he does have two heads, so of course I'm going to be big' with a glare as if it's the most natural thing in the world to say and that they should never bring it up again. When they say you're too small tell em 'Well Dwarfism runs in our family' and stare at them with eyes full of fire.

Or yeah just ignore them if you can

[blackduckies]

Best advice try to ignore all unfavourable comments they just eat you alive. i believe i may have even upset people by to trying to be chatty, we all have different perosnalities and what offends one person will be a complient to another, water off a ducks back i say. The hormones won't be helping how you feel, either.

[Cass72]

I had one of the ladies at work ask me if I was "concerned" because I was so tiny. I don't think she believed me when i told her that my OB was impressed with bub's size and the fact that I've lost some weight (which I didn't need or want).

Yes it's annoying but I guess we have to just grin and bear it.

[MummyTummy]

I have the same issues - I carry all out in front from very early on and so people always tell me how big I am, am I sure it isn't twins etc.....

The other day someone I work with commented that I am 'huuuuuuuuuuuuge'. She said that all through my last pregnancy too, so you'd think this time she would just think it was normal for me, wouldn't you?

But I always measure spot on for my dates, and my last baby came out as 3.6kgs - above average, but not massive. I think it is funny, I have no issues with how I carry, I love my belly and I love being pregnant. My Ob tries to reassure me everytime that it is all measuring normally and that all it is is my organs and bowels all being rearranged to accommodate the growing baby, plus fluid and a bit of bloating. I don't need the reassurance, but I think he must see alot of people that get told they are too big/small and so it has become part of his routine to reassure that all is well.

All you need to care about is the measurements that the M/W is giving you. If she tells you you are too big/small then you have something to deal with. Otherwise just try to remove yourself from the conversations of gossips with nothing better to do with their time!

[Linzy]

I love your son's name Mummy Tummy!

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

PMSL - you've reminded me of the thing I hated about pregnancy! And I didn't get strangers commenting until I was about 9m.

BTW, fundal height is STUPID. My very big boy was tucked away in a small tummy - so small I had five scans in all to check he was growing. Yes, he is, I'm fine, I'm just very tall and rather slim so no wonder I don't have a belly that can double as a tea-tray. (I had one midwife telling me off about fundal height two days after a scan revealed that DS was nice and big.)

I tended to start making comments back at work (because those were the only comments I got: no-one else realised. Actually, some people at work thought I'd been laid off, the only reason they could come up with for a 7+m pg woman looking forward to her last day!).

If I'm looking big, I'd tend to say that they must be due before me.

If I'm looking small, I'd say I was starving myself to get the pregnant modelling contracts.

If they noticed I was talking to the baby... then I'd talk nicely to them.

If they just walked up and touched my tum, I touched their tum back.

If they commented on how I was carrying... I was quite pleased they'd not noticed or decided not to say I'd put an inch or two on my thighs too. About as much as I'd put on my breasts, and those smallest possible feeding bras never really were filled unless I had two cloth breast pads in there too.

Oddly enough, I got a few comments about 6m and then they just stopped. Before I could really enjoy myself. Some people are so mean. I want to be pregnant again and have a whole bunch of new people to teach what not to say to a pregnant woman.

[MummyTummy]

I like yours too Linzy! Funny thing is I call him 'Jett Monster' too!!

[~Kaz~]

Tell them you find their comments hurtful and inappropriate and ask them if they'd like you to comment on their bodies constantly. Seriously - you go to work to do a job, not make personal comments about people. If you've been discussing details of your pg with them, stop. I found this the most helpful strategy to shut down unwanted discussion with work colleagues. I just didn't discuss it with them in the first place. To me it was a personal issue and not something I wanted to broadcast at work. It depends on your work environment but I never brought it up. It didn't stop the questions and stupid huge/massive//big/twins comments but I always gave minimal and vague answers and most people got the hint after a while.

hun. A big baby is a good thing believe me, once it's born, you'll be wanting it to put on heaps of weight. (Not saying you'll have a big baby, just that if you do, there's an upside).