Should DS start school next year - April Birthday ???

[Lukesmum]

I haven't been on here for a while but I really need to hear some opinions and experience replies. DS2 birthday is the 12th April. So he will still be 4 when he starts school. He will turn 5 in April. We are in NSW. I have no idea whether to start him next year (2012) or not. We held back our first DS for a year but his birthday is July 30th. DS2 goes to preschool 2 days a week and they had his name down as going to school next year but I told them we had decided not to send him. He is home today after being at preschool for 2 days and he is so bored. On the other hand he still wets his pants accasionally. His social skills are quite ok. Not sure what do. What do you think?

[Trillian]

Have you asked his preschool teacher what they think? They are usually pretty good at at assessing kids for school readiness. It is hard though - some kids are so hit and miss and some will be more than ready for school and others wont be. What is your gut feeling on it though? My eldest is a late Feb baby and we sent him at 4 (to turn 5 in 3 weeks of starting) and he was completely ready for school, but other kids who were the same age were either held back, or they have since repeated a year at school (we are also NSW). If it were me, I'd be doing all I could to help him prepare for school and even take him to orientation days with the view that he will start next year, and if you think that when the time comes he really needs the extra year at home, then keep him home. Plus, it is another 5 months before the new school year starts and by then he might be fine to go.

[diannescruffy]

It really depends on your DS. We kept DS back, he is April too, he just wasn't ready though. I'd have a chat to his pre-school teacher as Trillian said. All the best.

Regards,
Dianne

[Lukesmum]

Thanks Trillian for your reply. I will pick the enrolment form up today. Like you said 5 months is still a while away. I'll put his name down for orientation and see what the teachers think. Like you said when it comes to Feb if I think he's not ready I just won't send him. It just worries me that there will be kids in his class that are a full year older than him. My other DS is one of the oldest so it was never a problem.

[Lukesmum]

Thanks Dianne - My husband really wants to keep him home for another year but he really babies him. It's a difficult decision because I don't want to hold him back from learning but on the other hand like you said Dianne if he's not ready I don't want to make a mistake and send him.

[Lukesmum]

I think you are right Berrme. It is mainly the wetting pants and it will prob get better as the weather gets warmer too. Preschool haven't said anything to me about any problems and they had his name on the big whiteboard as going to big school next year. They even sent the school starter pack home. Maybe I should do all the paperwork and get orientation under way and then make the final decision at the end of January. I think DH is another factor. He really thinks he is not ready but he is not here all day and only sees him for an hour at night when a 4 year is tired and ready for bed

[berrme]

I think DH is another factor. He really thinks he is not ready but he is not here all day and only sees him for an hour at night when a 4 year is tired and ready for bed

Very true, there is a huge difference between my DS's maturity during the day and in the evening. He is also different at preschool to at home. I believe that it is often the parents who are scared about big steps like starting school.
Have you asked your DS what he thinks about going to school? My DS was in the preschool room at daycare last year too, and he was upset when most of his friends moved on at the end of the year and he was still there. He wanted to go to big boy school with the other kids.

Do you need to get approval to keep them back in NSW. I think in QLD you need to have meetings and evaluations etc to have them start a year later.

[Lukesmum]

No, you don't need approval in NSW. I just picked up the enrolment form. The secretary at school couldn't really understand why I would hold him back if he had an April birthday but anyway we will see how orientation goes.

[berrme]

Sounds to me like your only real concern is that he still wets his pants sometimes and 5 months is a very long time when it comes to gaining better bladder control. If the preschool teacher had concerns they should have expressed them to your by know. If he is bored at home now then I would think that he is ready.
I think you need to remember that the prep/ preschool year is designed to get kids ready for real school. It is learning the very basics and lots of play and social skills. No matter what age they make the first year of school there will be kids who come from backgrounds where they have had no educational influences. So it has to be really basic. I second going to check out the school and facilities. I went for prep open day yesterday and it is really just like the preschool room that my DS has been in at daycare. DS didn't want to leave as the playgrounds were so great.

[Trillian]

To try to ease your mind a bit, try not to worry about the age difference and what that means in terms of learning once he's at school. I know with my own DS, that he is in the top 5 students in his year group out of nearly 50 kids, he is even ahead of most of the year 6 kids as well. Age often means little when it comes to actually learning at school. Once at school he will be assessed and taught what he needs to be taught. I'm at uni studying to be a primary teacher and I've just finished my first prac and one thing I noticed was that in any year group you can have such a wide variation of ability and the teachers allow for that and give them extra help if they need it. And when he does orientation, the teachers will be able to give you an idea as well.