Do you have a local adult ed? Sometimes they have basic sewing classes.

There are some very basic beginners patterns out there that step you through what to do, nothing particularly classy, but better than nothing when starting out. Patterns will tell you what material and notions (buttons, zippers etc) you need. Often you get better help once you have picked a pattern, that way the assistant knows exactly what to help you with.

Basics (not in any particular order)-
tape measure
tailors chalk
pins (berry and basic, also pins do need replacing after a lot of use)
generic needle pack, needle threader (often comes in needle pack),
needles for sewing machine - basic ones to start, book should tell you which ones- these tend to be cheaper from the sewing machine stores (well I have found that so for Janome needles)
good scissors (honestly do not skimp here and look after them, do not let your partner use them on leather)
stitch unpick
spare bobbins for your machine - get more than you think you need
bobbin container for already threaded bobbins - warning some have really dodgy clips and always open, so get a big rubber band if you get one of those
needlework scissors (good for fiddly bits and unpicking) - optional initially
small containers for all the little things you gather over time.
Container for all the stuff - I found a tool box from Bunnings to be much better than the "proper" sewing kits, the lid on them tends to break off over time. Also some tool boxes come with a small box in the front for the little stuff. Mine is a double layer one on wheels (I have a lot of stuff)
Threads in basic colours - handy for mending, so black, navy and white are often good