For tea it's like it or lump it here. Lunch? I too will ask DS "what do you want", but that's cos I know 90% of the time he'll just ask for a peanut butter sandwich. If he doesn't know, I say, would you like A or B. He's way too little to get it himself (although he does help himself to yoghurt and fruit). He gets his own brekky with a little help.

As someone said, if she's old enough and can't make a decision, too bad, get your own I reckon.