teenage kids can be so cruel and oblivious to parents realities of money and health.
teenage children can be so oblivious to the realities of their parents finances and health.
i raised a bunch of kids on my own
with an ex that didnt pay child support
and dragged me through court for years to avoid it
i was already quite burnt out from overworking for decades during the marriage as he was a conartist and would trick me into signing for his huge debts
and so i was forced to overwork for years and live in poverty paying off his continuous huge debts that in fact were supporting a partying double life, while he would tell me he was working he was actually partying
i see how oblivious my kids are to my exhaustion, and the lack of money and what i carried all these years alone
some kids were troubled or sick from the huge trauma we went through from my ex, stress comes out in different ways i had exhaustion migraines stomache aches other of the kids had other ways it came out in, eg anorexia
one teen was trying to work a little bit as a teen but then wasnt reliable in reportingtheir earnings so centrelink would stop their payments as a teen and i would ahve to support them totally with no health no money and so so so much extra. it was crushing the weight of wht i was carrying physically emotionally and financially all those years and my health showed it for years,
other of my kids screwed me in other ways, just simply taking their youth allowance as if it was something for teens to spend on themselves at a whim while i was tryign to support everything, clothes, school books, uni books, groceries , with no income, no health no contributing, the whole workload of several kids on me, no cleaning help, and a huge burden of a bunch of kids and alot of stress.my health was constnatly collapsing from so so much ongoing huge stress from all sides
now one of my youngest ones was about to do similar, take their youth allowance to spend at their whim while i am supporting them more than i can.
i had just paid thousands, more than i can afford for her to have all she needed for vce,- books, study guides, tutoring, (the tutoring alone was $425 for summer courses next week ,) for clothes, for social for the summer and a youth camp she belongs to , and now suddenly because legally she can get a hold of her youth allowance, she is taking it despite that i am the one paying for more than i can afford to for her.
i saw how oblivious my other kids are. one tonight said things like
' thats what a parent does,'
totally oblivious to the fact that i'm not a bank and the realities of how much i just paid out without even a proper income and how shocking it is tht now that child wants to take their youth allowance away to spend at a whim while i have just paid out so much for her.
its bad enough being alone and one one income but its not even one average income.
she said things like
'well other parents take jobs'
totally oblivious to what it was like all those years with alot of kids on my own
burn out
health problems from stress
a few kids with huge health or behavioural problems
being dragged through courts for years by an ex avoiding child support, which by the way he got away with, child support just say oh well, they dont teach these guys that if they avoid paying child support that it will catch up with them no matter how many years later they are caught, so i got the raw end and burden whichever way i turned.
no money
huge stresses from kids eg anorexia etc huge huge stresses that one of them would have b roken most people and was so huge for me let alone so much at once.
recently as kids recently grew older and started moving out, when i had less kids in the house i could do more re work etc but still on a one less than averagell income with a big mortgage and more kids at home than i can afford to support, who dont contribute to expenses and one has been also sick in hospital, the burden on me is enormous, and their comments add salt to my wounds they just shows no realisation of realities and how hard it was and has been all these years from so many sides
there are memories that are so heavy to experience and recover from, and i can see they are so oblivious to it all,
like when my son was sick and i had so many expenses and yet i was not getting the youth allowance to suppport him, just because legally kids can and do do that and parents then are left to suffer from all sides.
one of my daughters who made these comments has no realisation the toll her behavior or not reporting to centrelink and then losing her centrelink and me having to support her totally and her anorexia took on me and i can see she still doesnt
she herself recently had a breakdown after trying to raise her one young child alone despite her having huge help from family around her which i never ever had and i had several kids to raise alone
she herself has started experiencing a bit of being dragged through court and the toll it takes
i can see i was even now still putting myself under huge pressures tryign to releive her and take her shopping for groceries and clothes for herslef and the baby, when i truly cant afford it to do this. i cant afford it and she is so oblivious to realities.its extremely extremely upsetting
themedia made a huge fuss about the aged pension not being enough but seem to be oblivious about the sole parent pension and how thats not enough
i had 5 kids in my home a year ago that i was trying to support on less than 20 000 with a mortgage aswell. i just wanted to die all the time from the pressure
and yet they will treat me so badly putting more and more pressure on me just because legally they can, while i am left to pay for so much without the support that gov give to pay for it all. its extremely upsetting.
people have said my kids learnt how to abuse me from my ex. its not just my ex its also my mother who does things like buy expensive presents for people then she finds ways to put pressure on me that she doesnt ahve enough money
my mother often has been a psychopath enjoying watching me in torment and encouraging others to torment me and i so often wanted to die from the torment she puts me through at times, totally non sensical, but if she sees it torments me she pushes harder rather than backs off.
she now is putting pressure on me because she offered to pay a lawyer to get back my daughters child for her after she gave it up during a breakdown. the lawyer cost 30 000.
How does that make me more able to live on less and to be screwed taht she uses that as justification to put me under more pressure if she offers to pay 30 000 for a lawyer that doesnt somehow mean i have more income suddenly and can be put under more pressure just because she offered to put herself under more pressure.
the realities of what i go through and how much i give and give and give more than i can and then how abusive and selfish teens are not even realising any of the realities is very upsetting for me.
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