Tali, your poor little man, I feel so sad for him. Big to both of you. BUT - I think you have responded in a very positive way, and if I were in your shoes I'd keep going with the same approach. I'd try to notice all the good things that he does each day, even if they're little things it all adds up, and I'd also try to have some 1on 1 time with just him before he goes to bed to get him to come up with a good thing that he's done or has happened to him each day, so that he goes to sleep with a positive thought in his head. And when his Dad is home, try to get him to do the same, cos at 8, a boy's Dad is a really strong role model & hero.
Thank Girls... I know I am not a bad mum its just hard to hear your baby so upset and feel like i have contributed by not telling him enough how good he has been... It so easy to slip into just yelling at them when they are fighting which seems to be all the time... But I know that I am always have a shorter fuse when BHL is away so that is something I have to work on....
oh I so know how you are feeling.. My 9 yr old has said this to me before.. I really don't think they understand 100% what they are saying.. My son has some self esteem issues and was seeing a guidance counsellor at school and has really come along in leaps and bounds since.. We changed the way we did things at home too.. just being very consistent with our discipline and remembering he was only 8 and not 18 and still needed to be treated as though he was a child.. kwim? I found that once we had the other kids we tended to let Ethan fend for himself a bit more..
He also had and still does have a kid that picks on him at school.. We have taken a different approach to dealing with this seeing as the school is doing Jack about it.. have you asked him how things are at school? Is he different on the weekends and school holidays? Ethan is brilliant then but during the school week we get tears and the I hate everything attitude.. (which has lessened heaps since seeing the counsellor)
Anyways great big It sucks and hurts when our kids hurt
to both of you. BUT - I think you have responded in a very positive way, and if I were in your shoes I'd keep going with the same approach. I'd try to notice all the good things that he does each day, even if they're little things it all adds up, and I'd also try to have some 1on 1 time with just him before he goes to bed to get him to come up with a good thing that he's done or has happened to him each day, so that he goes to sleep with a positive thought in his head. And when his Dad is home, try to get him to do the same, cos at 8, a boy's Dad is a really strong role model & hero.
Reply With Quote
Bookmarks