Did you revert to your maiden name after you separated?

[~breeze~]

I'm currently trying to decide this myself. I think if I go back to my maiden name I'll have to somehow convince XH to let me change the kids names to mine aswell. I dont feel bad about taking away the "carrying on the family name" as his dad had 4 sons & other grandsons to carry on the name, my dad had 3 girls so no-one to carry his name on. DS also has XH's dads first name as his middle name so he will still carry that name forever IYKWIM.

To me its important that my kids have the same surname as me, its personal choice, this is just what I want for us

Good luck

[Visitor7]

My mum changed hers when she divorced my dad (not when they separated). She didn't change ours as she divorced dad, we didn't. And it would have been a little unfair for him for us to lose his surname.
My MIL has been separated for 22 or so years, and still has her married name. She will never divorce FIL, so will always keep the name.

Personal choice I think. You need to do what you feel comfortable doing.

[LimeSlice]

Thanks ladies.

I am in no hurry, and Charlotte with definitely keep DHs name, but I was sparked to ask as I noticed that I inadvertently wrote my maiden name on the senders panel on the back of an order last night :/

[Inanna]

Cuddles Lex... As soon as for me the marriage was over I changed my name. I actually didn't go back to my maiden name. For me my family of origin was a bit of a nightmare... I actually felt like I was going back wards to take back that name... (plus I didn't like it!) It reminded me of where I came from not what I wanted to be... I took my husbands name because I was happy to let go of my family of origin etc... So now in letting go of my husband I wanted a new beginning. I actually took my maternal grandparents name. They were the most influential people in my childhood. They taught me about love, compassion, forgiveness & unconditional respect & love. It was a big decision for me. But now it feels like that's all I have ever been!

I love it!

Do what feels right Lex - I am not divorced yet but there is absolutely no way I will ever go back to my marriage & letting go of the name felt right and good for me. I didn't want to share a name energetically with him any more. If I was ever to re marry I would not change my name again...

Unless it was of course to Richard Gere - then I'd be happy to be known as Mrs Deb Gere!!!!

[~Phoenix~]

that you are in the situation to even be making decision.

I went back to my maiden name after first visit to my lawyer and she told me I didn't have to wait for for divorce to go through (had great pleasure serving divorce papers in my maiden name )........I strongly disliked my interfering Ex MIL and she was the only other Mrs " X " and I wanted nothing to reference me back to her but then I didn't have children then either.

I've remarried since and only last week changed over my drivers license & last bits to new married name, only thing left in my maiden name is my house. I'm not sure what I'd do now if relationship went pear-shaped with a child involved.

So basically do whatever you feel comfortable with.

[BellyBelly]

I did. Was very freeing.

[widdly]

I havent changed mine back to my maiden name, but I have been very tempted and if DH and I stay separated this time I will change my name back.

My mum changed her name back when the divorce came through.

[Amity]

Never took his in the first place.

But do whatever you think is best.

Sending you HUGE hugs.

[Inertia]

The second I walked out the door.