How to protect but not enable?

[Jewel]

I think you do what you need to protect your kids.

Thing is that it sounds like your ex is not the sort to get off his bum and do the right thing anyway, whether you enable him or not.

Couldn't agree more. I would send them with the kids for their safety.

[Gigi]

your gut instinct puts the kid's safety first - i would trust that over everything else.

Yes, ex SHOULD buy life jackets for them himself, but when and if he does this - the girls need to be safe NOW, not when he "gets around to buying safety equipment".

Good idea to get on well with the ex's new fiance, i hope that goes well (into the future too).

i hear you on the cost of swimming lessons, (let alone times three).

[fionas]

Carry on getting on with the new fiance. She'll probably do your dirty work for you and give him a kick up the bum about this stuff if you keep her onside.

And totally agree, send them with the life jackets. Keep your priorities straight and keep the kids safe. Who cares if it's enabling or not.

[shellbell3]

I don't think it should be that big a deal. If my kids need something and I know ex doesn't have I just send it along. As long as it comes back and if its something needed regularly then I suggest he buy it to keep there. But at the end if the day it's what my kids need that I care about. Might be annoying at times but i just do whatever is needed

[AwesomeFoursome]

I would send things if it benefited my children. I would hate something to happen then have to spend the rest of my life thinking, if only I had sent the life jackets. Does it really matter in the long run if it is protecting your kids?