Hey all

I was just looking for some opinions on my situation. I'm seven months pregnant to a married man ( I know, I know. *Head*.*Wall*) who already has two children and a wife and a grandmother who I think is pretty important in his life. He comes from a culture that I suspect may value the male son over anything, and probably also is quite strong about "family".

So far he has ignored the pregnancy, denied paternity, told me he wants nothing to do with the situation and won't reply any longer to emails. It's not his reaction I'm so worried about. I am open to him playing a role in the kids life but it seems that's not to be so far.

I'm having a son soon and I'm wondering what I should do. Bare minimum I want to send an email with details of the birth.

But..do I tell Centrelink I know who he is? I'm a little worried that if offical Child Support letters start turning up at his wife or grandmother's house then all hell may break loose - what if those women influence him to do something about it all - go for custody or cause a big fuss? I'm so protective of this kid-to-be I'm not sure I should say anything to Centrelink - just deny I know who the father is, and sign all the stat dec and whatever needed.

Off course it's not fair I wouldn't get child support - I do know enough about him to provide details I think, but how to you weigh up the chance for a bit of money to the possibility it all gets ugly really quickly with his family. I mean maybe it wouldn't happen...and maybe years down the track it could happen even if I don't go for child support - it's all such an unknown.

Also...any suggestions as to what to tell my son as he asks about a father - I don't want him to feel rejected by a man who showed no interest but I don't really want to lie and make up stories about Daddy being dead or something.