Hmmm...that's a tough one.

I can imagine you wanting your son to have a relationship with his paternal family, that would be important to most people. And maybe deep down she really would like the opportunity to acknowledge the relationship and get to know her grandson.

BUT (and this is coming from my perspective as a family lawyer), I would be worried for you that you're making things difficult for yourself. On the one hand, she might decide to have nothing to do with you or your son - that would be sad and disappointing, but at least you tried. On the other hand, she might decide that she does want a relationship with him - and this might be positive, or it might not. I've seen a lot of cases where the paternal grandmother decides that she has 'rights' over the child and starts demanding things from the mother (you). And even though you bend over backwards to allow her into your son's life, she won't ever thank you for it. She might be primed to see you as the enemy, especially if her son has anything to do with it. I guess what I'm saying is that if she does want a relationship with your son, it doesn't mean she's going to be particularly nice to you. In fact, she might be really nasty to you. She certainly won't ever be appreciative that you brought this beautiful little boy into the world - she'll only see her relationship with him as important.

I hope I haven't upset you, and I have that if you do decide to make contact that it's positive for all of you. Remember - if she keeps kidding herself that your little boy is not her grandson, (and I reckon she knows the truth deep down) you can hardly be blamed for her not wanting to be a part of his life. That's her loss.

Good luck.