I dont really know what I want from this thread, apart form just getting it out I guess...
Ok where to start... I have always been a thin person underweight most my life... Before Ds I was 48 kg and 165cm tall, a bit too thin I know ...
but now that I have had 3 children and I am now the dreaded 30 I am feeling really fat.. Its hard to know why, I know that I am in the healthy weight range, and everyone always says things like they would love to have my body, but I hate it... all I can see is my huge fat legs without any shape to them at all, and my tummy skin from having the kids, not that I can even really blame them as I when back to been thin ( 53 kgs ) after having each of them...
I am now 56.5kg, and I hate it... I hate everything about my body, I dont want anyone to see it, I make sure the lights are off when DTD as if they are on all I look at is how gross my body looks...
I wish I could be happy within myself, wish I could see what others could see...
I dont wish this for my girls I always tell them they are healthy, but other are always calling DD1 a skinny binny and string bean, which is what I have had all my life but also know that half my problem now, cant cope been a normal size, as too me I look fat...
like I said dont know what I really hope from starting this thread, I guess it would be nice to know that I am not alone out there, that other people too feel this way, and that there is a way to feel good about your self as you start to age and your body shape starts to change...
I have never seen myself as someone who is good looking, I dont even think I am pretty, I am just me, big nose, bad skin, shocking hair, me.... but feel now that I am ageing my life or my youth is long gone...
Just wanted you to know that you're not alone, honey. I'm about 10cm taller and right now I'm 65kg and I feel HIDEOUS. Before the kids I was just over 50kg and quite happy with myself. I know my current weight is 'healthy' and 'normal' but I just about burst into tears when I see my reflection in the mirror. This is not *me*, this is some big heifer wandered in from a farm somewhere.
I too worry about the effect my body image is going to have on my girls - DD1 told me the other day she had 'fat knees' and wanted to 'take them off'... obviously she's getting those sorts of sentiments from me and it kills me to think I'm going to be the one to blame if she ends up having a poor body image when she gets older.
No advice to share, unfortunately... just wanted you to know you're not alone in being 'healthy' and 'normal' and hating it. I want my pre-baby bod back too! Big hugs hun
i think most women have some form of body image issue.
I know for my self i have put on alot of weight since having children but i dont see it, when i look at my body yes i see the flabby bits but i dont see me as 100kg(yes thats right ) i see my self body as it was before children. this also isnt healthy due to me not seeing the reason to "diet" cos i havent changed in my minds eye!
i Believe as women we need to stop abusing our bodies and thinking that we are disgusting... no matter the size its all part of life we get fat we get skinny through out different stages... i guess we need to love US more then our bodies ..YK?
Ok, I'm gonna fess up here (*whispers* I weigh twice as much as you do) and strangely enough I'm quite happy with myself. Yet there was a time when I was near the bottom of my healthy weight range, and looked nearly skeletal and yet I loathed every inch of my flesh (I didn't have a very high regard for myself in other areas either). I'm telling you this so you understand that body image has nothing to do with your body's *actual* appearance.
I learnt to love my body by learning to love what it does for me. I took bellydancing classes and learnt to enjoy the sensations of dancing. I started choosing to do things because I enjoyed them and learnt to feel proud of the things I have achieved, even tho those achievements may be invisible to the next person. That's how I rebuilt my body image. It's really a big fat cliche, but it *is* about loving yourself.
Of course, it's not healthy to be as overweight as I am and I'm hoping to work on that now that I'm recovering after finishing chemo. And yeah, fatness is *not* the worst thing that can happen. I'm having a mastectomy in Dec and I'm working really hard to overcome the challenge of losing a breast, but counting my blessings every day because I'm one of the lucky ones. When you hang around near hospitals a lot like I have lately I've realised I'm not as bad off as I imagined - all sorts of young people struggle with the most incredible health challenges. Carpe diem - seize the day. Yeah how you look is kinda important, but yaknow what, it's not your lasting gift to the world. People will love you and hold you in high regard for who you are and how well you love them and what you do with your life, not how you look.
Last edited by AnyDream; October 19th, 2009 at 11:52 AM.
tali i have always been a thin/skinny girl and i know what you mean about knowing that you were too thin but feeling weird when you do actually put on weight
im 170cm and at the moment about 49kg. last year i was 56kg and to me i thought i looked pg because i actually had a belly that i never had before.
i think sometimes its hard for us naturally thin gals because everyone else thinks that we have nothing to worry about. i know i have just as many body issues as overweight girls and i shouldn't be judged for feeling that way.
just remember that you are what you are and you are beautiful for being that way.
unhealthy body image
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) i see my self body as it was before children. this also isnt healthy due to me not seeing the reason to "diet" cos i havent changed in my minds eye!
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