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thread: I'm frustrated and really NOT liking my child... (very angry/frustrated vent)

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Sep 2008
    In a cloud of madness.
    4,053

    I'm frustrated and really NOT liking my child... (very angry/frustrated vent)

    I don't even want to look at miss s atm. She never freaking sleeps more than 2 hours at a time, she freaking screams whens shes not being held. I just want to yell and scream at her to f**** go to sleep! I feel like crap - this lack of sleep is really getting to me. I know I need to talk to another dr because my dr won't give me the ref to tresillian. I have tried wrapping her/un wrpaping her, she has the same routines all the time. I'm sitting here bawlig my eyes out because i'm so freaking angry with her all because she wont go to sleep and won't stop screaming

    I really really don't like her atm, I want her to go anywhere but my house atm...OMG - i sound horrible it's making me more upset reading that back to myself...

  2. #2
    Registered User

    Oct 2007
    Perth,WA
    2,942

    Take a big huge breath Sunshine. Being sleep deprived is awful, and while you know it won't last, that doesn't help you right now does it. Can you just call tresillian yourself (sorry I don't know the procedure with them) and get in to see someone? Does your DH help you a lot? Is there anyone else around that can help you?

    You'll be OK, S will be OK too....just try and be calm

  3. #3
    Registered User
    Add Kazbah on Facebook Follow Kazbah On Twitter

    Sep 2006
    Dandy Ranges ;)
    7,526

    can you give someone a call and get some rest? I hope you get some rest soon - what your feeling is perfectly normal, and it sounds cliched, but a good sleep for you will really make the world of difference, and you'll then be able to follow up with Tresillian.

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Jul 2006
    Cloud nine :D
    6,309

    Take a deep breath, Is there anyone you can call to help for a few hours... sleep deprivation is such an awful thing...

  5. #5

    Mar 2004
    Sparta
    12,662

    it's pretty normal to feel a bit of dislike for your baby after so many sleepless nights.
    If she's really making you angry it's ok to put her down somewhere safe and leave her to scream for a bit while you step out into your garden and get your cool back.

    Giving her a massage might help her relax and sleep for longer. Have you tried co-sleeping? You might get a better nights sleep if you only have to roll over to comfort her instead of getting out of bed.

  6. #6
    Registered User

    May 2005
    Canberra
    3,617


  7. #7
    Registered User

    Dec 2008
    1,431

    gosh sweets, we've all been there. I can tell you that I have yelled at my baby to "effing go to sleep" a time or two. Doesn't help, but made me feel better for the 3 seconds before the guilts kicked in.

    can you pop her in her cot & give yourself 10 mins breathing space? It's not cry it out, its not neglect, its head space for you, its time to get calm & come back just that teensy bit refreshed.

    at the worst of moments like this, I have popped DD in her cot & gone off for a shower / cry & then came out feeling ready to tackle her again.

    Best of luck gorgeous, its hard stuff this & you're doing your very best.
    xox

  8. #8
    BellyBelly Member
    Add Party-of-five on Facebook

    Sep 2008
    bunbury WA
    2,114

    its so hard running on no sleep

  9. #9
    Registered User

    Oct 2007
    Middle Victoria
    8,924

    Do you have a Maternal & Child Health Nurse you can talk to? They can also let you know of resources in the local area and refer you if you want.

    Look after yourself, hope you all get some sleep tonight.

  10. #10
    Registered User

    Sep 2008
    In a cloud of madness.
    4,053

    Can you believe she didn't go to sleep until 1.30 this morning and was happily awake talking and playing with her dummy in her cot at 5am this morning!! Where the hell does this child get this energy. It's frustrating me to no end!

  11. #11

    May 2008
    Melbourne, Vic
    8,631

    Oh massive hugs Hun. I was right there with you last night - I was telling DS "just go to sleep!!!"

    I'm not functioning too well on the lack of sleep... Handing them off for a bit today and will try and get some sleep but not likely...

    I know what you are going through, that sinking feeling you get when you hear them awake again, how you just want to ignore it...

    Get another Gp to give you a referral to Tresillian. Alternatively do the day stay program at O'Connell Centre, you don't need a referral for that.

    Good luck Hun!

  12. #12
    Registered User

    Feb 2008
    140

    I've had 2 kids the have pushed me to my limits with sleep deprivation and it is a horrible horrible experience. Makes it nearly impossible to enjoy your baby or mothering of them or feel like you are doing a good job with your other child. What I also found difficult second time around was my doctors and MCHN reluctance to refer me to any services because it I was a 2nd time Mum and had been to sleep school first time around so I should know what to do, it was just a matter of doing it. This approach was totally frustrating as if I could have I would have being doing something different but by then I was just in survival mode trying to get to the end of each day. When I reached breaking point I had to look at other options outside the box like getting a regular babysitter for a period of time so I could catch up on some sleep or finding someone to come into our home to run a sleeping program which we would have had to pay for but at that point in time I would have paid anything to make it all stop.

    In the end we made a plan of steps and time frame for getting help so I knew there was a light at the end of then tunnel. We decided initially we would try for a week of DH stepping up more and tackling the night together instead of it being only me responsible for the night this improved my feeling of support. If that didn't work then we were going to push for a return to sleep school and if that wasn't successful pay for the in home service. In the end we managed to sort it out at home but it wasn't a quick fix my DD was older than yours and while there were improvements in the first week it took time to change things.

    It is a hard, hard road and I think your idea of seeing another Dr that might be more helpful and supportive is a great idea. Hope things improve soon.

  13. #13
    Registered User

    Jul 2007
    Melbourne
    867

    Hi. I totally understand how you feel. Sleep deprivation is just terrible, that's why it was used as a form of torture in times gone by!

    Both my DS and DD were shocking sleepers. I am still up a couple of times a week with DD.

    I noticed you live in Sydney. I went to Tresillian with DS and they were good. However there is a private sleep consultant we also used who is fantastic that is based in Newcastle. She does do telephone consults so perhaps give her a try? If you google Sleep and Settle her website will come up. She is really supportive and fantastic.

    Good luck, hang in there it does get better!

  14. #14
    Registered User

    Jul 2009
    1,973

    Honey big giant hugs..I know how you feel Miss H has nevewr slept for more than what 4 hours at a time, we are now and have been for weeks now waking up every hour or so ,i am so tired i dont know how i cope, iv got angry at night ,but took a second and calmed myself down...We co sleep as then i just have to roll over and i don't have to get up, do what ever u can to make this time easier for you,sleep with her if it helps u both get more sleep

    I know its no answer but i am just trying to ride it out in the hope that one day she will sleep better..U are doing a great job hun and its ok to feel like this , just take a second ,and breathe xx

  15. #15
    Registered User

    Sep 2008
    In a cloud of madness.
    4,053

    We do cosleep most nights because I really just can't cope getting up - but now shes just laying there can crying, i try feeding her, changing her, patting her, massage rubbing her tummy in case it's a tummy ache, panadol/nurofen because shes teething so badly atm, cuddles anything and everything - warm shower/bath. but she just doesn't settle. hoping it will settle soon

  16. #16
    Platinum Member. Love a friend xxx

    Jan 2008
    hoppers crossing
    2,380

    My youngest who is 18mth thinks is great to wake up @ 2am...and scream and cry lil bugger. i so know how you feel. she maybe feleing you're feelings aswell so you being upset maybe making her worse go figure huh?

  17. #17
    Registered User
    Add Danielle_NZ on Facebook

    Jun 2010
    Springfield, QLD
    1,085

    I really feel for you right now :-(

    Can you contact a local family daycare scheme and see if you can book your little one in for a few days, you should be able to get some help from centrelink in regards to fees and during that time you can make time for yourself... otherwise is there a friend you could perhaps ask to watch her? maybe someone close could have Miss S for a night just to allow you to get a full night sleep to get back on top...

    Wish I could help more

  18. #18
    Registered User

    Nov 2008
    Melbourne
    1,521

    Hi sunshine.

    First big there's a reason why sleep deprivation is used as a form of torture!

    I am wondering whether you are in a position to go to a private facility? There is one at Miranda (will check the name for you) and they take self referrals. A couple of friends did it with their kids and said it was fantastic. Might be another option if you're having trouble getting a referral to Tresillian

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