After reading a few threads in the last days about parenting, it strikes me that we don't get good feedback very often about the job we are doing raising our kids. Many people have left work to have their babies, a workplace where their work was reviewed and where they were told when they were doing a good job or given guidance on areas to improve. There is not much of that going on as a parent. We are often left to sort it all out ourselves or to compare ourselves to others - not a great idea when we never have the full picture to compare. Although we may know that we are doing a good job or at least have a general idea, sometimes the daily grind can get the better of us, sometimes we can question what we are doing when the long term goals are yet to pay off and sometimes we just have a crap day and need someone to let us know we are on the right track.
I've been struggling with the behaviour of my two in the last little while and with the sheer exhaustion of not having proper sleep for the last 4 years I am feeling a bit lost in this parenting caper. I received an email from a friend who is also a parent yesterday, a friend I really admire and constantly inspires me to be a better parent, more calm, more considerate and more attuned. She ended the email by telling me I was doing a great job as a mum. It felt wonderful and absolutely fueled me to head back into the fray with a renewed sense of purpose. I try to make an effort to tell mums I know who I admire that I think they are awesome and I try to tell them exactly what it is I admire about them but I think that sometimes I forget, or I think I have told them but I haven't.
Anyway, this is a reminder to turn to a mum or a dad you admire and tell them that you do. Tell them they are doing an awesome job, give them a performance review!
I think it's a great idea! I for one know how such a comment can really pick you up, and I try to do it to my friends with children too, as it's easy to get lost in the daily grind as you say.
I'm a high school teacher and had Parent/Teacher night tonight. I had the pleasure in telling several parents what gorgeous young people they had raised and what a credit they were to themselves and their parents! It's lovely talking to the parents of our awesome students!
I was in the supermarket the other day and a lovely old lady said to me “They should give all mums a medal” . It was lovely (and I was having a good day so I didn’t even really need it ) We ended up having quite a long conversation about her daughter that was born 3 months premature weighing only 2 pounds! The little old lady said her mother said to her “You’ve just given birth to a skinned rabbit” and I said “Oh great, did you say, yeah thanks mum just what I needed to hear right now!” and she said “Yes! That’s exactly how I felt”. Anyway her daughter was in hospital for 7 months and the doctors said she would never be a "normal" child. But she is, she’s living a full life and particularly enjoys scuba diving. So there ‘ya go!
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Tell a parent they are doing an awesome job
. It was lovely (and I was having a good day so I didn’t even really need it
and I said “Oh great, did you say, yeah thanks mum just what I needed to hear right now!” and she said “Yes! That’s exactly how I felt”. Anyway her daughter was in hospital for 7 months and the doctors said she would never be a "normal" child. But she is, she’s living a full life and particularly enjoys scuba diving. So there ‘ya go!
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