ugh help!

[Maruschke]

DD1(2.5) has started rebelling at bedtime. Any excuse she can come up with, she will, to delay going to bed. She gets a lot of attention before bedtime, she is home with us during the day etc, so it's not a lack of attention in general.

We have been sticking to the routine, pj's and teeth, leaving the door open a crack, with the light in the hall on so she can just see, story, milk, cuddles and kisses, bed.

Now she has a new trick - vomitting. If she has been put to bed and doesn't want to, she can vomit on command. I have no idea how to fix this, ideas??? We are fast running out of sheets

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

What time is bedtime? I know when Lieby was younger he went to bed a LOT later than his peers, but it meant he went to sleep when he went to bed rather than battling for hours. And by late I'm talking 8pm - so late for a pre-schooler, but not really late.

I'd be making her help clean up the mess. It may not help but it will show her that actions have consequences and it may make you less annoyed. Hugs to you - so upsetting when they do this.

[nickle730]

My 8 year old still uses every trick in the book to delay bed time, but vomiting? That's dedication to your goal!!

Are you sure she's not actually ill? I've never heard of a kid who can vomit on demand. Or is she getting herself all worked up to the point of vomiting?

I don't have any really useful advice, sorry. We worked on the theory of anticipating all demands prior to putting DD to bed - off to the toilet, small drink, story, cuddle, back rub... off to sleep now. Sounds like you are already doing all of that. If DD comes out we quietly tell her to go back to bed and ignore any carry on. In all honesty, it seems to work... although she'll still try us a couple of nights a week!

DS is six and he plays hard all day. We put him to bed and he is asleep by the time his head hits the pillow - bliss!!

[kelebek]

is she still having a day sleep?

[Maruschke]

She goes to bed between 7 and 7.30 each night, and she isn't sick at all. When we get to her she is laughing and joking... like it's a game and she has just won. We do make her help clean up but really really want a fast solution.

[Maruschke]

is she still having a day sleep?

Yep, 2 hours 11-1.

[black_rose]

Nickle my dd could vomit on command, she was lactose intolerant but it took us a while to work it out so she threw up a lot and in the end could do it if she was upset or wanted to avoid something.

Marushke it's a tricky thing to work through, consistency and sticking to the routine is the key but it's difficult when she is rebelling so hard. You need to find something that will make bed time a positive time for her, maybe a special blanket, a book she can read or a toy?

[Little Chicken]

What is she like going to bed at night without a day sleep?

My almost 3 year old has not had a regular day sleep for six months. When she does not have one, goes to bed and sleep no problems, when she does have one, delaying and carrying on for ages.

[Heaven]

Try moving bedtime back? DD1 also has a 2 hr day sleep and she goes to bed at 8.30pm.

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

How long before bed does she eat? Can you cut out supper?

Also, Liebs started to drop day sleeps at 16m, by 20m he was up until 10-11 if he had a day sleep. Useful for evening events, but nightmare otherwise. So maybe your girl doesn't need them?

If helping to clean isn't helping, do you have a spare bed? Just put her into that and walk away. Change sheets on the bed when she's not there, so no extra attention. Even a child's camping bed on the floor of another bedroom could work, they are fairly inexpensive.

[Maruschke]

Hm maybe we can push her bedtime back half an hour and see how that goes.

I haven't tried her much without a day sleep, but on the rare days she misses it, she is fast asleep by 6.30 pm.

We eat at 6 pm each day, and DD1 is also lactose intolerant.

[Santosha]

Wow. That sucks... but impressive dedication to her cause! I can't think of anything worse. I hate vomiting. And love sleep. makes you wonder about their perception of the world doesn't it? I just want to say to my kids sometimes "but sleep is awesome!"

Is she anxious, or is a purely control / avoidance thing?

I agree with FB about her helping to clean it up... Could work. If it was my DD though, she'd quite enjoy that bit. She LOVES washing stuff!

You could just take her sheets and blankets (except for mattress covering) and tell her she can't have any if she's going to vomit on them? Again, might work for some but I know this would make my DD hysterical.

What ended up working for us was something to make bed-time super appealing. We bought her a little torch to play with which she was so excited about she kept asking to go to bed and then practically kicked us out before we'd had a chance to kiss her goodnight! And since Christmas, she's been able to choose between the torch and having a little glow-stick. Oh toddler joy!!

Hope you find something that works. Cleaning up vomit is the pits. oxo

[kelebek]

Could you try shortening her day sleeps? or push her bedtime back is another good option. DS almost always goes to bed about 8.30pm, I know that is late for a lot of families but it seems to work for us.

[Barb Glare]

Seems she has a need. Vomiting is not nice and it is pretty hard to believe some-one would do it just for attention. Do you think you could meet her need for a while? Lie down with her/cuddle her? Put her in bed with you. No it's not *giving in*. It's not *making a bad habit* - she is upset and you are responding, which is normal for a parent to do.

[Arcadia]

Dd hasn't had consistent day naps since 2.5 but if he sleeps 2 hours in the day she will fuss around until about 9pm (we add nap time onto usual 7pm bedtime to work out when she'll be tired).

I always sit in the room with dd while she goes to sleep. We do stories in bed, then lights out and I sit on her bed and read my book on my iPad or phone. If dd is unsettled I read my book out loud. My mum used to read us pride and prejudice as kids, and I can safely say I can't remember a thing about it, because we would drift off pretty quickly lol.

[LuluHB]

I'm going to go against the flow and say restricting her day sleep is probably not the answer. I tend to think that if little ones are sleeping for a couple of hours during the day, and still going to bed between 7-7.30 pm (albeit not at the moment) then she needs the sleep.

Am I reading right that she has her milk, reading etc OUT of bed and then when all that is done you put her to bed? If I've read it right, maybe try putting her into bed around 7pm ish and then do the rest of her night time routine in bed, so she's already quietening down and relaxing in her bed IYKWIM.

[Tegam]

I restricted ds day sleep from 2 yrs4 months. His sisters were going to sleep between 6.30 and 7pm and yelp you guessed it I wanted some quiet time. I did it in a gentle way and on the days he just couldn't make it we let him sleep of course buy yay as he lays down at night he falls asleep. It's been 18 months now since he had regular days sleeps and he is so good to get to sleep still. But we eat early so an early bed time works well for our family. When we just had dd1 it didn't matter so she went to bed later and had days sleeps right up until she started school.


Ps: I can still vomit on demand. Always could shhh don't tell my mum