Do you feel invisible sometimes? Or is it just me?

[AnnaBelle]

I was just wondering if its just me that feels like this or is this a common thing....
I often feel that I am just invisible at times and
forgotten about or overlooked. I am fairly sure it is not intended/ on purpose but I just wonder is it something about me/my personality that makes this
happen..or am I just over analysing things??
For example...
What I mean is specifically things like at work...(I work ina hospital but there are about 12 of us that work on a day to day basis )my birthday got forgotten..yet everyone else seems to be made a big deal about theirs, this also happened in my mothers group I had a significant birthday a few years back and there was mention to do something and nothing happened - yet
it feels like everyone else soemthing gets organised for them...
I hate jumping up and down saying look at me but at the same time it would be nice for something to happen like it does for everyone else!

Just an example of what I am feeling - am I alone on this feeling invisible at times and just oversensitive? I dont know I make an effort with lots of people..not just birthdays but that is an example of what i am talking about.

Love to hear back and any suggestions on how to move forward with this
Anna

[TubbyPuff]

Hi Anna,
I knwo exactly how you feel, I often sit and wonder myself if It's just me, if I'm over thinking.. But you are certainly not alone.
I hope people start to notice you and pay more attention to you soon. It's not nice to be left out

Also, I love your name mine is also Anna

[TeniBear]

Definitely! I always feel invisible, like no-one sees me (which is, y'know, the definition of invisible )

I see photos on FB of parties I didn't even know about, let alone get invited to. I'll be talking to someone and realise a minute later they're not even listening... Happens all the time for me.

[AnnaBelle]

Hey TubbyPuff - maybe its an Anna thing

TeniBear - I would have felt really invisible if no one replied here so thats a good thing - and its nice to know
that I am actually not a total weirdo with these thoughts - so what do you guys do to make yourself feel better or
move on?

[TubbyPuff]

Hey TubbyPuff - maybe its an Anna thing

maybe

[beansbeans!]

Apparently, I dont only just feel invisible but am literally invisible too. Its like Im in a twilight zone, I can see and hear everyone but no one sees or hears me. (Sorry feeling a tad down tonight about being invisible to the world at the moment)

[TubbyPuff]

Apparently, I dont only just feel invisible but am literally invisible too. Its like Im in a twilight zone, I can see and hear everyone but no one sees or hears me. (Sorry feeling a tad down tonight about being invisible to the world at the moment)

[Eenee]

Oh yeah sounds like me so your are not alone there. I end up giving up on meeting with friends cos I seem to be the one organizing to meet up all the time only to have people decline or pull out at last minute. Probably not fair on everyone me giving up but I just get so over making an effort and not being met half way.

I also feel sad for my DD and Bub because half the time they are made to be invisible too (family is good at this).


So I definitely know where you are coming from.

[AnyDream]

Yep, I have mastered the art of invisibility . In my case I think it was something I learnt to do as a child, in my unhappiness I was quite withdrawn. Now I am sometimes surprised to see myself fading again... But I've worked very hard to not let it affect my sense of valuing who I am.
I have learnt there are lots of reasons why people forget to pay attention to other people, and so I refuse to take it personally when it happens to me but I also work quite hard to really pay attention to the people that I do spend time with.

[megs]

Another one here who has that same feeling. Like Marydean I think some of it stems back from my childhood, it was easier to stay quiet than make a big deal as the consequences were to great if you stood out.

I too am now finding it like that in life, at my work no one acknowledge the births of my children, yet I always organised that hat to go around for others event. Now after being hurt too many times I just don't bother. I know I'm not a person who makes a fuss of myself because I think why would anyone really be interested but sometimes I feel it would be nice if people took the time to be interested in me, like I am in them.

I have a couple of really close friends who are fantastic but the people in the town I now live in well I still just feel like I sit on the fringe of their well entrenched friendship circles.

Sorry I don't have any solutations for you but I like MD motto of not taking it personally.

[ebn_d]

Another one here. I have always felt invisible, even as a kid. Nothing too horrible in my upbringing just nothing to make me feel I was worth anything. I now hate drawing attention to myself. Half the reason I fell so hard for my dh was that he noticed me! Lol. But I constantly feel like my feelings and what's happening in my life is overlooked. My friends are the same as others have said. One or two are really good but alot of them make no effort to talk to me but crack it if I don't make the effort for them.
No ideas on coping with it, I've often thought seeing someone about it might help but that would mean I was important enough for someone to listen to huh? Lol other than that I try to just surround myself with genuinely good people, who are hard to find lol.

[Astrolady]

Not invisible as such, but feel like I am not good enough. I seem to always help everyone but always get overlooked when it is me that needs the help. Or I volunteer at places to get my foot in the door and am good at what I do cause I keep being told, but get overlooked when hours become available. I feel like I am just not getting anywhere with life.

[STARRYSKY]

I hate feeling like that and I do feel like that quite a bit. Sometimes if I am in a REALLY negative head space I find myself (you know that little voice in your head?) saying things in my head that take me way back to being 14 again "I should just shutup and not say anything" "no one is listening anyway" etc, etc...
I detest people talking over the top of me, I will just withdraw and not participate in further conversation if that happens.
Another thing that really bugs me is when for eg:

You go to a friends birthday/ party/ celebration what have you...the same people are always invited, you have met them all in the same surroundings at least 4-5 x over the last 3 years, but every time you see them they make like they have no idea who you are. HATE IT!!
My dp says it is because I am just good with faces/names etc.. but I'm not really, I just don't see how hard it is to say," sorry I dont remember your name, but yes, I remember you from last time"

I have just recently unfriended a heap of "used to be close" friends from FB. One girl, I always went out of my way to drop in and see her if I was down her way, she would whinge about not seeing me etc.. it started with "I was gonna ask you to be my bridesmaid but you were in Darwin so I asked my other friend" (I have NEVER been a bridesmaid, she knew how much that meant to me) then I didnt get an invite to her baby shower (it was all her MIL's fault she said) then she was posting updates on FB about how she was only 10 mins away from where I live (like every weekend) but never once dropped in to see me, I withdrew, then eventually just deleted her. feels good! LOL

I do try not to take things so personally, I am a lazy friend most of the time, so I understand how life gets n the way a lot of the time. but if you make the effort with me, I will mostly return that effort 3 fold.

In regards to birthdays and things like that, I tend to be the one making the effort when it is mine, no one else will and the way I see it is that its my birthday, my celebration, I will shout it from the rooftops as I love birthdays!

I'm sorry you guys feel the same way sometimes, I know how awful it can be.

[teresa]

first of all big hun!

i know how you feel. i started a new job a few weeks ago and i feel like i am being overlooked for everything! i have come from a different hospital interstate but working in the same field as i was with a lot of experience and yet cant seem to get anywhere there. yet a new girl rocks up, first week there, very little experience and goes straight for the stuff i already know how to do and could do with my eyes close

it also happens with other stuff too. i feel like no one ever wants to take notice of me and i am just not there!

big xx

[forshelby]

I have felt like this too. I decided that allowing myself to think about it too much was bumming me out more than the actual occasion/event I missed out on. Did that make sense? I guess what I'm saying is I choose not to let a crap situation become even worse by dwelling on it.


It sure does suck though.

[AnnaBelle]

Thanks girls - I am feeling a bit more "normal" now a - as they say in the Night Garden "Isnt that A Pip!!"

Some of you just said it so eloquently - I couldnt have described it better myself.
and yes..the best thing to probably do is count your blessings and the good sincere friends that you have and not
dwell on this sort of thing as it does make you feel down.

I think I am more of a one on one type of person and when there is a big group of us I sort of get lost - a feel like I am
at a dance and I dont know where to stand or do when there is a whole grouip of us together - I feel awkward -does that make sense -
I relate and have a better time with less people around..but saying that I wouldnt describe my self as a shy person - just that when there
is a big group sometimes I might say something and no one says anything back as they are listening to someone else (more important/ interesting to
them!!)..and so it begins again!!

xx Anna

[Lebaby]

I know exactly what you all are referring to. I'm also a nurse at the hospital, although feeling excluded at work doesnt bother me anymore as I tend to brush it off pretty easy. My mentality is I'm there to work, the priority isnt to make friends cuz I have friends outside of work environment.
But often, I feel isolated and invisible at home. My partner is supportive, but being an alpha male, he seems oblivious to this. (Its possible its just in my head). There are certain people in the household that are so good at making me feel inadequate and insignificant. Sometimes I rub my belly to comfort myself, saying 'its me and you bub'...
Needless to say, Im still feeling uneasy being here.

[Tegam]

Just had to reply or make matters worse I guess

I suppose there is a balance between being invisible and not actively self promoting yourself.

Everyone is busy. The squeaky wheel gets the oil.

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