thread: 3 year old will only poo in a nappy

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Dec 2007
    Melbourne
    1,628

    3 year old will only poo in a nappy

    So girls as the title suggests DD refuses to even sit on the toilet to do a poo. She insists on a nappy. So obviously she knows when she needs to go which I am taking as a positive.
    As a very vocal child she won't tell me why she wont sit on the toilet. Forcing the issue doesn't help as she can hold on for days.

    So far we have tried to talk to her about it, read books, talk when I do it, rewards chart.

    Does anyone have any other ideas? Please help

  2. #2
    Registered User

    Jan 2006
    by the beach,NSW
    1,767

    I think it's fairly common for that to happen. Yes, it's a pain, but after watching/experiencing my just 4 year old niece with major constipation issues for the last 6 months, don't push it too much!! She'll do it when she's ready (sorry, probably not what you want to hear)

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Mar 2007
    Melbourne
    4,031

    Does she stand when she does a poo?
    It's usually a problem as they can sometimes think a part of them is falling out when doing a poo on the toilet if that makes sense.

    A friend was advised to see if she get her little one to have the nappy on and sit on the toilet to do the poo in the first instance, then after they are comfortable with that, still have the nappy on, cut a hole in it to let the poo drop in the toilet.

    Alot of kids don't like the splash back that can occur.

    Apparently another trick, I tried and it worked a little is telling a story like this:
    Mummy and Daddy poo in the toilet, and their poo is having a party in the toilet. They would love your poo to come and join them in the party.
    It sounds silly, it can work

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Jan 2007
    7,197

    With a gf who has a nearly 5 year old who still will only poo in a nappy I would seek some help in case it gets worse. They may give you some ideas to help with any underlying issues and hopefully sort it sooner rather than later.

  5. #5
    Registered User

    Dec 2006
    between the mountain & the ocean
    757

    3 year old will only poo in a nappy

    We went through this with our ds at the same age. I have to say we tried everything mentioned and nothing worked. Eventually we stopped talking about it all together, didn't make a big fuss about how he did his poo or where he did his poo and then one day he came to me and said he wanted to poo on the toilet. We praised and praised him and he hasn't looked back your dd will poo in the toilet eventually , just try not to make it out to be a big deal, that is what worked for us. Good luck xoxo

  6. #6
    Registered User

    Jun 2007
    Where Chaos is fun and plentiful!!!!
    1,883

    Ds was the same. He had easy access to the nappy packet and would go and grab a nappy when he needed to do one.. he had tried the toilet on and off and loved to sit there and wipe his bum, but never actually poo'd on there!! lol This went on for MONTHS!!! He was TT at night, during the day (being a boy though he did and still does alot of his wee's outside on a tree!!! lol) Any way, one day when he was nearly three... i ran out of nappies in the packet.. i still had the odd one in a nappy bag etc, but the packet ran out. he went to get one and realised there wasnt any there!!!!! So we set up his seat, he sat and nothing. So i left the special seat on the toilet and we kept playing.. about 5 minutes later he went racing down the hallway and all by himself he did apoo on the loo!!!! Lots of praise and congrats and hugs and he never did a poo in a nappy again!!! (DD was still in nappies, so i kept the packet in the cuboard where he couldnt reach just in case.. but he never asked for one again!!!

    I think for DS it was a bit of independance thing.. he liked having his nappy on and he would go off and do his business.. while i was trying to TT i always stayed with him for support lol coz i was trying to be encouraging and seeing what he was doing.. but once he was able to just do it himself, it all clicked!!

    Good luck!!!!

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Jan 2006
    8,369

    DS was the same until just before he turned 4. He sorted it in his own time. He knew what was happening/about to happen and if he was refused a nappy he just did it in his pants. Can't remember what worked, think it was a combination of him having to admire DH and I pooing on the loo and being made to empty the poo from his pants/nappy into the loo, because "that's where poo lives". Time works out many "problems".

  8. #8
    Registered User

    Oct 2008
    Victoria
    4,601

    My nephew did this. He was wearing undies but would ask for his 'poo nappy', go off then come back to get changed back into his pants. He eventually grew out of it

  9. #9
    BellyBelly Member

    May 2008
    1,110

    We had to instigate a pretty high value bribe - poos in the toilet = icecream on a stick.
    We also gave the poo a name and discussed that "Boris wanted to be in the toilet".
    It was very annoying - he would go and hide when he needed to pooh so we couldn't put him on the loo. But eventually he got there.

    And we made changing pooey nappies slow and fastidious - so we could explain that just wiping a bum was much quicker!

  10. #10
    Registered User

    Dec 2005
    6,706

    We are having a similar problem, except he's refusing nappies when they are offered, so it's in undies every single time. He's dry overnight, so it's frustrating to have to put him in pull ups when we go out, if he seems like he's going to do a poo soon.

    The Flying Butter - today we started getting Sam to empty the poo into the toilet himself to hopefully get the image in his brain. He was bribed with chocolate to sit on the potty for a while, and was there for a good ten minutes. No action, though. He holds on and holds on until he can finally hold on no longer and goes in his pants. Nothing we can do can convince him to actually try.

  11. #11
    Registered User

    Oct 2008
    1,572

    DD2 currently refuses to poo in the toilet at home. She'll go at day care but at home she runs outside strips off and poops on the lawn :-/ I figure at least its not in her nickers.

    I'm trying to not make a fuss as she often gets constipated at her dads and she needs to stand up with a straining bar (the slide) to complete the action. Like the others suggested, in time it will happen I hope.