Anyone got any ideas on how I can get my 8 week old DD to go to sleep at a normal time at night? Currently it's any time between 10pm and 1:30am. I am exhausted!
Give up on a sensible bedtime for a few months and after all the wind-down rituals, snuggle on the sofa together while you watch TV? (TBH, I wish I'd done that earlier - ended up doing this from about 3m+ and waiting until he went to sleep earlier to start doing early bedtime.)
Agree with flying butter - Ds1 was like that for quite a bit; although it was more like 9-11pm bedtime. the end it was less stressful to accept that he was a night owl and not bother to try to get him to sleep earlier than 8:30; it's only in the past 3/4 months we've managed to go to bed regularly between 7 and 8:30pm.
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Make sure the day sleeps are in a light room.
Get her into the sunshine early in the morning.
Try to keep her awake from about 4pm and then settle her around 6:30-7
Make sure the room is dark and quiet when you feed her in the night.
Otherwise, just watch tv and doze on the sofa while she gurgles on the floor. Do you sleep in the day? You need to be getting a couple of hours every day...I wisH I'd done that more when dd was a baby, because you never get a chance with subsequent children.
Was going to suggest what Arcadia suggested, particularly with the day sleeps. If that fails, definately try to snooze when she is sleeping/dozing and try to go to bed early yourself. I used to go to bed around 8/8.30pm in the early days b/c DD would wake up for a feed at about 11/12pm.
I think from about eight weeks we stated keeping the little guy up from 4pm till bedtime at 6pm and we do bath, feed in a quiet place (my bedroom with lights off) and then to bed every night. Not sure if I'm just lucky but it seems to make it tick in his head that this is big sleep time and goes to bed easily at night.
Maybe LO is just a night owl and when she starts sleeping longer u might start getting a full nights sleep if heading off to bed at 1030? I hope so for you!
I could do that if I left expressed milk for DH... She is cluster feeding in the evenings ATM so I barely get a minute's peace. It seems to be every 1.5 - 2 hours from about 5pm onwards so I'd need to have a heck of a lot of expressed milk saved up.
I am trying to sleep when she sleeps during the day but she has this habit of waiting until we are out or someone is visiting to go to sleep properly. At the moment she's in our room so I don't want to make it bright during the day when I'm trying to sleep too. Mum and I spent yesterday (while DD slept soundly) clearing out the mass of presents (toys, clothes, books etc) we've been given from her room so we can put her in her cot, only to find we didn't have any batteries for the monitors. I've wanted to get batteries today but it hasn't happened. I've been trying all day to get her to sleep so that I can. I finally got there at 3pm so I lay down and my brain wouldn't shut up! But if I'm out all day or have a visitor, she sleeps really really well! So I'm still in PJs and hoping DH picks up batteries on the way home.
I've been doing darkened room at night since about 3 weeks old. The problem is, we have a tiny little box of a house and the only place to feed is the lounge, where we watch TV. Sometimes our shows go until 10. I'm happy to record them and watch later. DH wants to watch to relax and unwind. DH also has a habit of getting her quite excited playing silly games and I'm trying to stop him but he is at work during the day so can't be silly Daddy then IYKWIM? sigh.
My advice would be to move bedtime til 9.30 - then your DH can be silly daddy all he wants before you start the wind-down routine.
I found that for day sleeps, I'd walk Liebling around the block in the pram until he fell asleep, park him in the back garden/hall (depending on weather) then he'd sleep better and I'd have more time in the day so I didn't stress in the evenings.
I remember the nightmare of cluster feeds when you want to get something done - Liebling was keen on his feeds. I ended up buying a sling I could breastfeed wearing, so I could go about my business while DS fed. Vital when you're making dinner!
I have slings but not sure how that would work. It's 12:30 now. DD still has not settled yet. I am going out of my mind. I am completely at a loss and feel like the world's most incompetent mother. I honestly have no idea what to do. I feel like death from sleep deprivation and now hayfever on top of that. I'm so scared I'll get to a point where my sleep deprivation puts DD in danger. I don't know how to change this situation. It's like a catch 22/vicious cycle. Totally stumped and clueless and despairing :'(
Could you try giving you dd to hold for 1/2-3/4hr while you doze /close eyes for a bit? That might help get through a bit of the night. I know I ended up doing that at one point (even did a variation that the other week with ds1 who is a bit older and wouldn't have a day nap).
Living on semi-healthy (or otherwise) takeaway for the evening meal for a week or so won't matter if that's what you need to do to survive either.
Depending on what sort of sling you have, it can be easy to feed in one once you've worked out how to position baby.
Have you got any other support apart from your DH that could come over and let you sleep if dd goes to sleep properly while they visit? Maybe they could do the dishes or laundry while you rest do you don't have to worry about that. I find that sometimes just quietly closing my eyes for a bit even if I don't sleep is sometimes enough to keep me going.
Re hayfever, ring your chemist if you can't get there and ask what's safe to take while feeding. I know I was allowed to take claratyne while pregnant and would guess (but not 100% sure) that you'd be able to take some while feeding. I'm pretty sure it is a category a drug.
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Yep, I've found out Claratyne is fine. Mum is a wonderful support like that and has been a big help but can't be here every day of the week as she babysits my niece and nephew too. If I wasn't having a tradie come around today and my niece and nephew weren't going to be there I'd go to my parents' house and get them to babysit while I slept. No such luck today. DH is wonderful during the day but flat out refuses to do anything at night once he's officially gone to bed
could you change your morning get uptime? I know with dd1 she would have 3+ hours in the middle of the night that were really unsettled so I normally didnt get out of bed until after 10 am (cant do it when you have other kids though ). She did get much better around three months. Day naps, or if you cant sleep lay down and close your eyes it helps. Slow cookers are great so you dont have to worry about getting dinner ready when baby is unsettled at night. I have expressd and lined DH up to do at least one feed tonight as he has only got up once to help since dd was born (he does do everything for the older girls weekend mornings though)
Might be worth talking to your DH and at least having 1 night on the weekend where he helps, even if you bf overnight he can get up get bubs, change nappies, burp and settle while you go back to sleep
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). She did get much better around three months. Day naps, or if you cant sleep lay down and close your eyes it helps. Slow cookers are great so you dont have to worry about getting dinner ready when baby is unsettled at night. I have expressd and lined DH up to do at least one feed tonight as he has only got up once to help since dd was born (he does do everything for the older girls weekend mornings though)
its hard
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