Sleeping past 1 sleep cycle

[bibidanni]

Bit of background: I am currently teaching our 4 months old to go to sleep in his cot rather than just my arms. After three days of being very consistent he usually settles well for his sleep after he had feed then play (I shush and pat him). However he always wakes up after 40 minutes (on the dot - you can set your clock by it!!). I then try to resettle him to get him into the next sleep cycle but have had no success whatsoever. After trying for 10-15min I give him some quiet time then try again. He takes forever to settle for his next sleep and again it's only 40 minutes. Often I end up having to put him to sleep in my arms, then transfer to cot, just so he'll get any sleep at all.

So my question - what have other people done to get your baby to extend into another sleep cycle?

At night he sleeps 3-5 hrs no problems so I know he can do it then!

Any suggestions appreciated!

[AlligatorsMum]

Hi bibidanni - no advice sorry my DS use to sleep in 40mins naps as well. He eventually use to throw in a 1hr nap every so often and it's only been in the last month (so bout 8mnths of age) that he sometimes does a 2hr nap during the day. He just doesn't seem to need more some days. We just go with it, think he is more of a power napper lol

[buffy1]

Ah, the dreaded catnap. It's hard.

I have a chronic catnapper. When she was really little I was able to re-settle more easily but when she hit your baby's age, nothing worked. I drove myself mad trying to get her to go back to sleep, making both of us really unhappy. After a while I kind of accepted the fact that that's the way she slept during the day - too much to see and do! - and tried to be guided by her behaviour. If she wakes up happy and alert, I get her up. If she's grizzly, I'll work pretty hard to re-settle. Now at six months she's starting to do a longer stint at least once a day, and I reckon she'll continue to consolidate sleep once she's more active and can tire herself out a bit. In the meantime I just keep putting her down as often as she needs it. So if that means 4-5 naps a day (hell, six if she needs it!) rather than three then that's what I'll do.

Not much help, sorry. I guess what I'm trying to say is, keep trying but also go with what works for now and gets everyone the most amount of sleep. They seem to change so often, just when you have it down the little monkeys do something completely outta the blue. Also your little guy is still so tiny, he probably just wants to be close to Mum. Have you tried wearing him in a sling, carrier or wrap of some kind?

[bibidanni]

Thank you. Hopefully he will start to sleep longer soon.

[forshelby]

My DS was like this, too. In fact he still wakes most nights at least once or twice. Although... *touch wood* We've been on a massive sleeping streak lately and we've gotten through three nights in a row without a wakeup!

Anyway, I found the more I stressed about his sleeping and changing his routine, the harder it was on me. I distinctly remember the day it got easier was when I just surrendered to the crapness, so to speak. I built a nest on the couch, and just laid there with him for hours and hours. That was when he started sleeping for three hour stretches, twice a day. So I'd spend almost 6 hours in my nest every day, surfing the net... crocheting.... not doing housework lol. But hey, I learned an awesome new skill (crochet) and felt so much less frazzled. I also took the opportunity to nap with him some of the time. It really was bliss. If your baby is sleeping well during the night, why not just go with it during the day and see what happens? Sometimes relinquishing some of the control can be the best remedy.

It's not easy, but it sure worked for me. And if you have to put him down to sleep, let him fall asleep in your arms, then transfer him. I coudn't do that because he'd wake when I put him down, so I figured why not just keep holding him? Or I'd pop him in a sling.

I hope some of my ramblings were useful. If not, just ignore the crazy pg woman/mummy/career woman/removalist/sex vixen ramblings..... LOL. Yes, I'm very busy. Too busy to re-read this. Good luck!!

[bibidanni]

Thanks! I used to have him sleep on me all the time but he just did not seem happy to do that anymore - he'd cry a lot and get sooo overtired because it was so hard to get him to sleep. We've seen some great changes lately though through gentle persistence - now has quite a few of his day sleeps in cot and some even over 40min! Gives me a bit of a break which is nice. Unfortunately he still wakes a lot a night - so we often end up co-sleeping which I would not mind if he wasn't such a wriggle bum!

[chody47]

My DD was always like this during the day, it's only stopped since she's cut down to one sleep a day. I persisted for ages trying to get her to sleep longer but I eventually accepted that the 40 mins was all it was going to be. I figure my trade off was that she always slept very well at night (all night from 16 weeks and only 1-2 wakes before this). It always made it hard to get things done, but it was just something I ended up going with...

[BellyBelly]

My daughter is the same as chody. Sleeps well at night (we cosleep though), stirs for a feed or two and right back to sleep. She has one big sleep during the day then several small ones. No good in the car or pram yet! Very hard to get stuff done during the day but cant complain about night. Bubbas only sleep a certain amount of hours in 24 hours, if they do well at night they will be more awake during the day and vice versa.

I get better sleeps from her in the hugabub though - tried slinging bub during the day? My bubba has just fallen asleep in hers as I have been typing and swaying Time for brekkie/lunch, yeeeeeah!!!

Great post forshelby

[bibidanni]

Thank you all. I'm certainly getting more relaxed about the sleep stuff, especially as he's easy one week and really hard to settle the next. Wish he'd sleep better at night. He doesn't like the sling anymore BellyBelly - he is such a busybody that he just keeps looking around!

[Ladylove]

I gave up. My DD was not a second past 35 or 40 minutes either. Nothing worked- resettling, keeping her up for longer, putting her down earlier. I just got used to doing stuff in 40 minute intervals and sometimes even then I'd get caught out when she woke after 20. At about 7 months she started improving, i think partially just a developmental/maturity thing, partly because she was crawling by 5.5 and walking on furniture by 6.5 thus more active. However this would never have worked at 4 or even 5 months. She was too little! And not ready. Anyway I guess I'm just saying she won't sleep like that forever.

[Ladylove]

Oh and totally build a nest- I wish I had of built mine earlier as once I gave in and stopped feeling like I wasn't doing it properly. My nest was idyllic and I realised all too soon how quickly that beautiful phase is over- babies become more alert, more active, easily distracted, less inclined to fall asleep and get milk drunk while feeding...so bask in it.

[BellyBelly]

Bibidanni - the HAB and others have forward facing positions - my babies all needed to turn around to see everything too

[bibidanni]

Thanks all. I now do a combination of sleep in cot and co-sleeping/ in arms. I mostly enjoy the times when I do hold him now as it is not all day long. I've also noticed that we can get him resettled into a second sleep cycle if he's really tired eg had a big day but otherwise it's just no go. As the night times have gotten a bit better though I'm not so stressed anymore about day stuff and am able to just go with the flow more. Certainly over spending all day getting my son to sleep when I can enjoy playing with him instead :-).

[bibidanni]

Sorry bellybelly what do you mean? What's HAB? Ta!

[BellyBelly]

Hugabub Glad you're enjoying him more than worrying about sleep so much. We spend half their lives trying to get them into bed then half trying to get them out... Not worth the battles

[chody47]

You sound like me. I was so much happier myself once I stopped worrying about the day sleeps and just went with the flow. I'm going to aim to do the same with this next bub.

[bibidanni]

Totally agree.