Constant night waking and feeding. Starting to lose what's left of my mind

[LuluHB]

Fun nights with Miss A are continuing. She goes down for the night between 7.30 pm and 8pm with a full tummy after feeding both sides. I usually try to feed her as often as I can in the afternoons to get as much into her as I can but she is frequently disinterested and/or distracted. She will wake up around 10.30 pm for a feed. And then around 1.30am, 3am, 4.20am, 5,30am and 6.20am. She gets lots of wind - sometimes wakes with a squeal, will be lots of wriggling and kicking going on, farts, grunts etc. It can take an hour for her to settle. I've tried Infacol, Infant's Friend, grip water and Brauer's Colic Relief, all of which work to some extent but it can still take an hour for them to take effect and move the wind through. During the day she doesn't seem to have wind problems, and as soon as she's fed I sit her up and she burps really easily.

I had been feeding her every time she wakes, and lately taking her into bed with me and just leaving her there so I can at least doze but it was getting ridiculous when her feeding literally every hour and not settling unless she was on the boob, and then it really was just comfort sucking. Not adverse to that but not every hour, every night. We're all (touch wood) over colds/flu so I'm back to try to settle her without a feed because I know she can go much longer stretches than that. Last night I had to feed her when she woke at 10pm, 12.30am and 2am, but when she woke at 4am I finally got her back to sleep by just jiggling and swaying her hammock for a mere hour, only to have her wake at 5.30 am for a feed. And then at 6.20 am (she REALLY likes 6.20 am).

So I would love some ideas of what I can do, if anything to deal with this wind issue because I am really starting to think that its the wind that's waking her, and then she thinks oh well hey, if I'm awake I might as well have a snack. I really don't like medicating, but someone is going to have to medicate me soon if I don't get some sleep, so I'm wondering if I can give her a dose or six of something before putting her to bed at 7.30 pm, and then again when she wakes around 10.30 pm.

We do the usual deep baths, cycling legs, pushing legs up but nothing seems to stop these painful wind episodes.

Does anyone have any ideas?

ETA: Oh, and the decent day sleeps we were getting are out the window too, and she will only sleep if she's fallen asleep on the breast and in my arms.

[onthefly]

That's really rough!
Sorry I can't say I have any ideas to help. I hope you get some more rest soon. Is your partner able to help out at night at all so you can have a longer stretch yourself?

[AndiE]

Hugs hun, nothing worse than sleep deprivation and the strain of constant feeding.
DS3 suffered a bad bout of colic when he was about 3 weeks old. I started taking him to a good paediatric chiropracter and she's worked wonders.

And this isn't so much advice as in letting you know what also helped my DS3 - sleeping on his tummy. Back when he was unsettled, he'd go to sleep on his tummy really easily and sleep for hours. DS3 did/does have incredibly good neck and head control for a little tacker though, and while I initially had reservations about sleeping him on his tummy, I'm much more comfortable with it now - though I do regularly check on him. I only tummy sleep DS3 during the day and when he's really unsettled. For the most part, he sleeps on his back now. Many others will be horrified by the idea of sleeping a small bub on their tummy, but I honestly think some bubs are born to tummy sleep. The chiro also said if they are windy bubs, the pressure on their tummy makes them feel better.

Hope you get a few hours sleep very soon, xx

[Jaycee]

My little man was/is a frequent waker as well. We ended up cosleeping and he would wake anywhere from 5 to 8 times a night on a good night. The good news is that the older he gets the longer he sleeps and we've just night weaned in the last week (he's 18 months). Hang in there it does get better xxx

[starangelk]

My DS was a pita sleeper compared to DD and I had no idea what to do. What I realised is that I wasn't being consistent. I wasn't giving myself an opportunity to see if my methods were working, I'd just do one night and then chuck it in if it wasn't working. And I forgot about the basics.

Apologies if you are already trying or have tried this but are you feeding to sleep in a darkened room? Is your bubba warm enough? The constant waking in the wee hours could mean coldness? Maybe an extra wrap or blanket or long sleeve pj's? If you aren't well rested, maybe your milk supply could be suffering. You could try some RLT, fenugreek or activite drink a couple of hours before that final feed? At her age I would be feeding her each time she wakes but that's just me. I put a chair in DS's room and fed him in that chair until he settled and then put him in the cot and pat him off to sleep and then the cycle would begin again.

Good luck, it is such a hard run and difficult time - sleep deprivation sucks. Sending you guys some sleepy vibes.

[Santosha]

Oh it's torture isn't it. Nearly broke me. At the time, it felt like it had. But I'm still here, intact... and at 14 months, he SLEEPS!!!!!

What worked?

Cutting out dairy from my diet dramatically reduced his wind. He went from a miserable, grunty, windy non-sleeper, to just a frequent waker, frequent feeder, play for a couple of hours from 1am kind of kid!
Tummy sleeping (as above, I certainly wasn't comfortable with it, but I was also desperate and it helped. I'd put him back onto his back as soon as I felt I could handle the more frequent wakings)
Survival tactics - kicked DH out to have the whole bed to manage co-sleeping and swapping sides all night, some fairly 'slack' parenting of DD (then 2.5) for several months, minimal domestic, social or mental output
Night weaned (10pm to 4am)... he still has the 4am feed, at 10 months. By my ideals, this was too early and not the most gentle approch, but I had to weigh up the costs during the day of my exhaustion and failing mental health
Holding onto hope. I remembered that DD's sleep significantly improved at about 12 months... and for the most part, I just held on.

Huuuuugest hugs Hun. Hold on. Be gentle on yourself. Know that one day, hopefully not too far away, you'll have five straight hour's sleep and it'll feel like you won he lottery!

[Taurean]

Oh big hugs hon. I think you've probably read around the boards about the issues I had with DD2 and sleep? Basically it went from great to POO at 5 months and continued for 3.5 months! Some nights I lost count how many times I was up but I knew that often I was up with her more than I was asleep. It was awful so I totally feel your pain.

Try a baby chiro, I think that helped DD2 a lot. And if you're comfortable with it, maybe consider putting her in her own room. I really wasn't that keen on moving DD2 out of our room but I honestly think it helped. I know SIDS say to keep them close for up to a year but I felt safe moving her with our Angelcare sound and movement monitor plugged in. And knowing DD1 had been fine when we moved her at just 10 weeks helped too.

They are the only things I can think of that definitely helped. I hope you get a decent night soon x

[Novella]

Lulu I feel your pain. My first two slept through from very early, DD3 has thrown us a curve ball. Six weeks after getting over an ear and chest infection and taking antibiotics we are finally back to waking only once or twice a night. She also had tummy pain/wind which I think has improved since she started eating yoghurt with probiotics, if you or your little one have had antibiotics maybe her wind could be due to an imbalance in her gut flora?

I also hear you on the distraction during feeds but a dark quiet place to feed is a bit hard when I have a boisterous 3 year old under foot so no advice there!

Lots of hugs its so hard, especially with older siblings to care for xxx

[starangelk]

Actually I second the probiotic. Talk to someone who knows first (naturopath) but probiotics are the bomb

[MrsFabuloso]

Have you tried giving the colic stuff earlier? So instead of trying to give it to her when she already has wind, try it when she first goes down to sleep. I used to have to do that with DS2, he was a very windy baby and frequent waker/feeder (still is!) too.
Another thing which worked for us was co sleeping all night. DH didn't like to co sleep with small babies, so we ended up in different beds, but it was worth it a) for him to get an almost decent sleep, and b) there was more room for me to fuss with DS2 and c) our bigger kids slept with DH if they needed to.
I also eliminated a few things from my diet, particularly dairy (we know now he has a intolerance to dairy and power spews if he has too much of it), as well as spicy things, and too much chocolate/junky foods.
If he was really bad through the night, I would give him a bath. Not ideal, but it was 15mins of busy-ness (undressing/bathing/dressing) compared to hours of unsettled screaming.
I have also heard a lot of good things about baby chiro's, but have never used one.
HTH. I know how torturous not getting decent sleep is!

[sangie]

Have no idea on medications but I remember changing my diet helped DS's wind issues enormously. I cut out dairy like the others have said and my naturopath also said steer clear of broccoli, cabbage, beans, spicy foods. I'm sure there were more things to avoid but I can't remember the full list (probably caffeine too?).

Best of luck and I hope you get some much needed sleepy time soon xo

[~TT40~]

hi!! *massive hugs* hun.

I havent read everyones replies but I was thinking about this last night cause Spock is the same. esp. with the wind. my only thought was maybe the suit I put her in at night to sleep, and her night nappy means she can't move around as much as normal which means she can't move the wind as easily, so more of it builds up. I've gotten to the point where I just lay with Spock next to me in bed with my boobs out and when she wakes up and wont resettle I give her the boob. easy and we both fall back asleep, but in the morning I am so sore from sleeping in a funny position. but in the middle of the night I just go for the easiest quickest option. Ive really got to start waking myself up and sitting up to feed her in the middle of the night and doing it like that, cause when I was doing that she was waking and feeding less. I think part of the constant waking isnt food its wind, and im just making it worse by feeding so often.

sorry this is really quick and on the fly cause Spock needs me but I wanted to reply cause I was thinking about it so much last night =)
*hugs* I'll come back later and read what others have written too =)

[LuluHB]

thanks so much lovelies. I gave her some Infant's Friend before I fed her at bed time, moved her hammock a little further away from the bed AND SHE SLEPT UNTIL 1AM!!!! Now I know many would begrudge a 1am feed for an almost 5mth old but I was turning cartwheels. She then slept through until just after 4am, and then it all went a bit pearshaped but wow. I got 4 hours of straight sleep for the first time in months, and probably more sleep last night than in a whole week combined so today I'm just tired, not comatosed. She also fed more than usual and slept more than usual yesterday pm so not sure what helped - maybe it all did.

Taurean - can I ask for your chiro's details pls. The one I used for Miss I is down in Australind and just a tad far to go to now ;-)

[~TT40~]

ok. so I have a little more time now cause DH is home... but that still doesn't mean I wont have to rush off =P. So, a few months ago, when Spock was littler, like 2ish months? we had problems with her waking every hour and wanting a feed and no settling. I soon worked out I think it was the too frequent feeding that was causing the problems and she wasn't hungry, but had wind and sucking/feeding was the only thing she knew would make her feel better so she wanted it. I decided that if it was less than 2 hours since she last woke up I would try and settle her without feeding her. the first few times it was hard. and it felt bad refusing to feed such a young baby, but after even one night I noticed the difference. when she did feed they seemed like better feeds, and she stopped waking so often, her wind settled. I then later read a thing about over supply and too much milk from the aba website and basically was exactly what i thought and i had done everything they suggested on it (yay for mummies instinct and just doing what i felt would work).
now, i dont think it is the same issue. but inbetween now and then I use to sit up to feed her (because i could never work out the laying down bit) and burb her etc in the middle of the night and whilst she would still be on the boob when she feel asleep, i feel it helped her settle for longer, even though i meant i was sitting up awake for an hour at a time. now in the last few weeks i have perfected the laying down to feed thing ive gotten lazy and sloppy and now she expects a boob to be put in her mouth straight away and we dont even have to wake up properly, which at the time is good cause she is quiet, but is waking more frequently and i am finding im not rested by the morning because i have slept in an odd position.
I think little things like always keeping it dark at night, I dont talk to her at night, (i have always done this though), even not having to change her nappy at night now helps cause even though i was down to only having to change her once during the night, that was enough to stimulate her too much.

how this is the turning point for you =) and if you to chat let me know =) im going to try and be more routine at night again too. Ive also tried the offering more feeds during the day in the hope it would keep her full over night...but I don't think this has made a difference. it just cuts down her evening/pre bed feed...

[Taurean]

Yippee!!! That's fantastic hon!! I was totally doing cartwheels when DD2 had a night like that after all her crap. Felt like a new woman, lol.

I've been taking DD2 to Young Chiropractic in Wembley. We see Magda and she's gorgeous!! I know that's not super convenient for you but she really is brilliant and lovely. I found another baby chiro in Burswood (I think) when I googled so they might be worth a shot. Wembley was just much closer for me. I'll come back with their name in a sec...

Burswood Health