thread: Why do we as a society feel the need to judge???

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Sep 2008
    In a cloud of madness.
    4,053

    Why do we as a society feel the need to judge???

    I've been pondering this question all day today whilst in my world of cleaning and dealing with a sick child.

    The question came about when I got thinking about comments that have been made to me over the last week.
    MIL kept making comments about how she feels DH treats me badly, and my parents are continually on about weight - everyones not just mine. The first comment out of their mouth when I saw them was about how so and so had put on so much weight. And for the record, I don't believe that DH treats me badly - we have our arguments and disagreements like any couple (and maybe MIL thinks this is common because she only sees us every 3 months).

    But it got me thinking, what gives us the right to judge others on so many areas of life? Is it because it makes us feel good about ourselves? Is it that its easier to point out someone elses flaws than face that of our own?
    I'm certainly guilty of judging others and in cases have been very wrong, i'm sure we all have. I'm certainly more careful now than I have been in the past, though I also think on some level, we all do it. "look at what is in xyz's shopping trolley", "look at what that kid is wearing, how can the parent let them wear that?" and of course there are the debates we see every day breast v's bottle, vax v's non vax.

    But really, where did we get this sense of entitlement and need to judge others???

    Don't really know if there is a point to this post, just curiousity and the fact there are no adults here to talk to LOL

  2. #2
    Registered User

    Jan 2013
    208

    But it got me thinking, what gives us the right to judge others on so many areas of life? Is it because it makes us feel good about ourselves? Is it that its easier to point out someone elses flaws than face that of our own?
    It doesn't give us a "right" per se but you've answered your own question there. I think it does have a lot to do with feeling better about ourselves and feeling like we're doing the right thing and others are not.
    I was wondering something along similar lines today...why do we get so defensive when people correct us? Or preach to us (religious or non religious)? What is it that makes us feel like we're being attacked when we're being advised? Maybe it's because we have all judged in some way and so when someone advises us or something we straight away shut off and feel like we're being judged and get defensive. I don't know, like you I'm just thinking out loud.

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Mar 2007
    6,900

    Just because that's how we work out what we think is 'right' and 'wrong'. I think it's only natural. Doesn't give us the right to be rude or voice it to people who don't want to hear it though, but I'm not against normal judging

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Jun 2007
    Brisbane
    1,621

    I think it's relatively normal to judge others, make comparisons, think certain things about people. I truly think it's human nature, unfairly or otherwise. I couldn't count the number of people I know who enjoy a bit of gossip. It's not malicious gossip, but gossip nontheless. Me included sometimes. And agreed, much of it is to make ourselves feel better. But I think sometimes we also do it to normalise our own situations.

    My issue though is people who can't keep their lips zipped. While it might be relatively normal (in my opinion) to judge/make assumptions, I don't think it's appropriate to tell the world - be it in person or via social media. Many people lack tact and/or filters. I think anyone prepared to make a judgement and go public with it needs to consider carefully what they are saying.