Vaginismus

[JoDan]

Just wondering if anyone else has this and is either overcoming it or has overcome it??

I am search of some support.

[Ambah]

Hi JoDan,

I have never had this condition myself, nor known anyone personally that has had it. But I am aware of what it is, and just want to wish you all the best in your search and hope that you are able to find some others who have been through similar circumstances to you, who have been able to overcome it succesfully.

[Kelli D]

Hi JoDan

I too have not suffered from this condition but do know someone who did.

I hope there are some members out there who can help you.

Best wishes

[JoDan]

Thanks Ambah and Kellie.

It's really hard finding anyone in Australia.

There are heaps over in america and stuff, and if I could afford it, I'd be on a plane to Minnesota where I know I could get treatment (ie. Botox injections).

I guess a next question is if any of you know of a gynae in Newcastle or Sydney area that would do the procedure. I have heard of some using valium to paralyse the muscles to perform a pap smear, I wonder what it so different from botox? except that it lasts longer and doesn't numb??

Thanks for listening...

[Sal]

Hi JoDan, vaginismus is best treated as a psychological issue (if there are no clear obvious medical reasons for it). Rather than botox you may be better off finding a sex therapist who can use gradual dilation therapy...the 'cure' rate is nearly 100%.

[JoDan]

Hi Sal,

Thanks, but I have researched all avenues.

Using the dilators is fine, but even after achieving intercourse, you still have to keep using them.

With botox, you give your body atleast 6 months to be able to have intercourse and because it prevents that particular muscle from contracting, it shows your mind and body that it really doesn't hurt.

Basically, yes some are succesful using dilators, others are not.

I have started with them and also saw a clinical psychologist in Sydney, but to keep going with his method it would cost me the earth and I really don't have any $$ to spare right now.

I am looking into the botox because it appears to be a final solution and generally a one off cost as opposed to going constantly to therapy.

For some, therapy is needed more, but due to the fact that I wasn't abused or anything, it doesn't seem to work for me.

Not only this, I have spoken to many sufferers and they have been using and still trying for some over 10 years without success with the dilators.

[Suzi84]

Hey JoDan,

You sound like you're about where I'm up to! I've been suffering with Vaginismus for a bit over two years now and can't count the amount of Doctors I've been to. I've been told there was nothing wrong with me and it's all in my head etc etc.

In the past 10 months I've been seeing a sexual therapist, Gyno and Phsycologist. After working through the Dialators (perpetualy stuck on number 3) and seeing my shrink, we've all come to the conclusion that there's mentally and emotionally nothing wrong with me. So where do you go from here?

My next step is to see a hypnotherapist. I've heard some pretty good things about it from my Doctors so if you want to know how that goes and if it's worthing paying the money I can keep you updated. I've also been seeing a reflexologist about it and seen some improvements, though not much. It's maybe more a relaxtion thing.

The next step is a full exam under general. My gyno wants to eliminate any physical problems that we might not be able to see so you may want to consider that. It'll be expensive but they only keep you in the hospital for a day.

If none of that works, there are two operations you can get. I don't know the technical term for it, and I should because I saw my Gyno today. What they do is make a small incision into a particular muscle which will stop your PC muscle from contracting and spasming.

The second one is the botox injection which you already know about. Apparently there's a specialist in Melbourne who can do the procedure. It's all by referral only and it really should be used as a last resort. In fact they both should be the last resort. The botox injection will completely paralyse your PC muscle, which means wearing incontinence pads for six months until it wears off, and if they cut too many bands out of your muscle with the other operation, you could end up running for the bathroom every time you sneeze.

I'm at my wits end now with it all so i'm willing to try everything. I also have never come across another woman with it, so it's nice to know i'm not struggling on my own.

Please keep in touch
Suzi

[TehCook]

You are not alone - Another vaginismus gal checking in. I have been married for over a year and a half and we would really love to have kids. As far as we know this is the only thing preventing us from getting pregnant - but then again not like we've been able to try yet. I is so hard to even have the CHANCE to really try to get pregnant stripped away from you by vaginismus.

You can attempt pregnancy however... and we are considering it. This may be TMI So that you are warned.

First off - you have to be able to insert something - whether it is your finger, or a tampon, an applicator of sorts. So - if you cannot because of the severity of your Vag - you need to dialate to get to the next step. I know dilators can be spendy - but you can use peeled vegatables (carrots and zucchinis), peeled down to the smallest you think you can do and covered with a condom, and lots of lube - to dilate fairly cheaply. Always try to relax when you do this - and don't work your way up too fast or you won't be helping yourself.

So you need an applicator - a tampon (empty?), a monistate applicator (monistat is an over the counter yeast infection treatment you administer to yourself in a similar way to a tampon - except you are applying a cream medicine to get rid of the infection - but the plastic applicator would be just perfect for this). , or a turkey baster boiled - of course so that it is sterilized.

Then you employ your methods to extract the goodstuff from your husband. and keep it. carefully and use your applicator to insert the semen inside of yourself. Don't wait too long.

This of course needs to be done in correspondence with your fertile cycle - so you need to be tracking your cycle (something if you have Vag you may not be used to doing as spontaneous pregnancy just doesn't happen... very often.) Fertility Awareness Method - and the book Taking Charge of Your Fertility - can be very helpful here.

And you at least have a chance at becoming pregnant despite vaginismus. Vaginal delivery is still an option - the body changes I understand because of the process of giving birth - and of course in a hospital there is the option of and epidural to ease the process. As well as something coming out is a bit different than something going in.

[krysalyss]

Hi there,
I have only just found out about this condition and may be waay out of line here but...
I had post natal depression after bubs was born for many months. I went to a few psychologist etc and it didn't really help me at all. I finally recovered by seeing a physiotherapist who was a qualified counsellor. She helped me through body awareness and exercises to cure my mind from the outside in instead of the other way around. Yoga also helped my recovery. I just wanted to throw it out there in case you hadn't thought of it for your particular condition.

[krysalyss]

Double post

[Suzi84]

Hi TehCook and krysalyss,

Thanks for your posts. krysalyss, have you only just found out about this condition because you've developed it? Not that I'm knocking your suggestions, in fact I welcome all the suggestions I can get, but I've tried all that. Wellness exercises by Louise L Hays and uping your body confidence. I do Yoga once a week and try and get to the gym every day. I'm in a loving relationship with a partner who fully understands me and what I'm going through so no issues there. We'd like to have kids, but not right now because I'm only 24. I can use a size three dialator in which is just a tad smaller than penis size.

If there's nothing physically and mentally wrong with me, why am I not getting better? WHy I can't I get to the last step?

TehCook, where are you up to progress wise? If you're wanting to get pregnant you can always use xylocaine, it might still be a tad uncomfortable or painful, but at least you get to make love to your husband while your baby is concieved?

[krysalyss]

No I honestly just looked it up from your post. And don't worry about knocking my suggestions etc I just thought I would put it out there as there is no harm to doing that but potentially some help. IYKWIM.
I hope you can find some resolution.

[TehCook]

Do you mean a topical application of xylocaine? or a shot?

Progress.... I can do up to about 1 1/2 inches in diameter I think. So decent sized...

I hate this thing. Argh... I know what you mean with "why can't I just get to this last step". So stupid.

[Suzi84]

Yeah I mean a topical application. You need to use it like you would Lubricant on your dilators to make sure it's applied to the right group of muscles. If you're struggling with the last dilator that's a great way to get to it, but I wouldn't reccomend using it all the time. Eventually you want to be able to have sex without having to use anything.

I'm seeing a hypnotherapist as the moment and so far that's going really well, I'll let you know if it cures me.

How are you going with getting pregnant?

[Snooks]

I also have vaginismus. Booked in for 5 weeks for botox. Not sure if this is the way to go but tried physio - with dilators etc and did nothing for me coz apparantly I have a severe case. Very scared bout the whole botox thing but!

[Suzi84]

After having vaginismus for 4 years, I can now tell you I'm cured.

What did I need to do? I left my partner. Vaginismus was an underlying symptom of an acute anxiety disorder that I'd manage to develop since being with him.

[Snooks]

Has anyone had the botox done?

[Lulu]

After having vaginismus for 4 years, I can now tell you I'm cured.

What did I need to do? I left my partner. Vaginismus was an underlying symptom of an acute anxiety disorder that I'd manage to develop since being with him.

Has this happened since your post in Feb? Wow.

Congratulations though..I think?