My 10 y/o neice refuses to eat!!! help!!

[[M]umma[M]ia]

ok..

My neice is turning 11 this year and she lives with her mum, her mums partner and her sister who is 6. Any hoo.. she is going through this thing atm and its really starting to worry me. She refuses to eat and if she does eat she hates herself for it because she thinks she has eaten too much and she is going to get fat. It sad to see her say "nah im not hungry" when i know shes starving. I went to a bbq with my sister today (her mum) and she came with us. But low and behold even tho about an hour before we ate she wanted to know where the food was coz she was starving.. she wouldnt touch the meat, she would only eat the salad and a little bit of it at that.

I was looking at her today and she is getting quite skinny and it worries me if its going to turn into something else more severe. Her mum knows whats going on and is trying to get her to eat anything but now she is getting worried coz as she said to me today "im worried about her, she hardly eats anything anymore".

I understand this could be a faze but it has been happening pretty much all this year and shes always been very concious of what she looks like. Even tho she is one of the prettiest girls i have EVER seen! Im always telling her she is skinny so it sinks in.. but i just dont know what to say.

anyway im posting this so hopefully someone can give me and my sister some advice to what to do. The only thing i can think of is to get her to go see somebody but i dont know who. she wont listen to anyone and she just thinks shes hidious.

hope that made sense. ask more questions if u need to....

[Chocaholic]

Take her to her GP and get a referral to a psychologist specialising in eating disorders in children. Unfortunately it needs to be caught as soon as possible for treatment to be its most effective and your niece is definitely showing the major signs of anorexia. I don't think it is a "phase" as she is obviously exerting considerable will power not to eat.

There is nothing that you can do that will be effective without specialised help.

Please, get her the help she needs as soon as possible.

[Nai]

It can lead to serious problems so I would definitely get your sister to take your niece to someone who is an expert in the area. I have put some info from the vic government website here that might be relevant.

Early warning signs
Children can become fussy about particular foods or lose weight for lots of reasons, but it is important to get any concerns checked out. Some signs that a child might have an eating disorder are:

* An intense fear of gaining weight.
* Denial of being hungry.
* Deceptive behaviour around food ? for instance, throwing out or hiding school lunches.
* Avoiding food.
* Compulsive exercising and a need to be active all the time.
* Eating in secret.
* Cutting out particular food groups, such as meat or dairy products.
* Developing food rituals ? such as always using the same bowl, cutting food up into tiny pieces or eating very slowly.
* Behavioural changes ? such as social withdrawal, irritability or depression.
* Sleep disturbance.

Some place to go for help

Professional help
If your child is preoccupied and unhappy with their body, or seems to be developing behaviours like restricting their eating, then professional advice may be helpful. See your doctor for information and referral.

Where to get help

* Your doctor
* Your local community health centre
* An accredited practising dietitian, contact the Dietitians Association of Australia
* Psychologist.
* The Eating Disorder Foundation Victoria (03) 9885 0318 non mtro callers 1300 550 236 Eating Disorders Foundation of Victoria - HOME

[Lulu]

Yep, call those numbers. Jump right on this one, quickly.

GL xoxoxo

[christy]

I agree, if I heard any of that I would have my radar going on overdrive.

[[M]umma[M]ia]

thanks for ur help girls. ill have a talk to my sister about it.. i really hope she will do something about it and doesnt shrug it off. its so much harder when its not ur kids coz i would know what i would do..

[KimB]

My eldest DD was borderline anorexic at 9 and we have had to go to many counselling sessions. Kalaidoscope (sp?) have fully trained people (in eating disorders) that she could talk to. Get a referral from your GP and phone them. She is now 13 and very tall but healthy. We had to go back a few times as she went from anorexia to bulimia.

Good luck for your niece.