Whats involved with donating your eggs?

[~breeze~]

Hi, I hope I have posted this in the right area....

I am wondering what is actually involved with donating eggs. I have been considering it for a few years but never actually looked into it.
I know you need councilling (with DH) before doing it which I'd be happy to do & know it would be needed before doing something so major, but what else is involved? Are there many woman on this site who have actually been through it?

The only thing I'm a little concerned about is parting with the egg & not being emotionally attatched in some way. It's a huge thing to me but I dont really want that to stop me helping another couple achieve their dream of becoming parents. To me it is one of the greatest things you can give & I'd love to know I've been able to help a couple in such a massive way.

So I guess the main thing I'm wondering (to anyone out there who has actually donated) is how did you feel when it came to crunch time? I dont know if I'd want to stay in contact with recieving photos etc or ifI'd prefer to cut all ties until the child is old enough to look for me him/herself.... if they chose to.

My DH wasn't happy with me doing it at first but he has finally come around so I'm just starting to look into it.

Sorry if I've babbled, I dont really know how to word it the right way........

Any replies will be appreciated
Thanks

[~breeze~]

[aussienic]

I am quite curious about this as well..

[The[cookie]Doctor]

I think Zee posted a thread about egg donation a little while ago. Not sure where or what info it has, but i'll see if i can find it.

ETA: https://www.bellybelly.com.au/forums...egg-donor.html
I don't know if it is particularly relevant though

[~breeze~]

thanks cookie

[dusty]

Danielle and Nic, I am at work at the moment but I will pop back in tonight to chat about some of things to think about with egg donation.
It is an incredible gift to consider giving someone or a couple.
xx
ETA I can always ask my sister to give you her insights too if she is willing.

[Papillon]

OH this is exactly what i wanted to post about.... although im a little ways off completeing our family (as i know that is one requirement), once we have had all the children we want to have i want to donate my egg's....

will watch this one!

[aussienic]

Thanks Dusty. I will look forward to what you have to say

[dusty]

There are many women/couples needing eggs for varied reasons and they may go through known or annoymous egg donation. There is a growing trend in Australia IME towards known donation which is probably for a range of reasons.

When you are considering donation you may want to think about which path you may choose. This could involve actually looking at adds in papers (Melbourne's child, major papers etc), on the internet for those seeking a donor and perhaps begin by establishing contact with a person/couple you think you may be interested in donating too. No obligations just a chat. Like Zee found on the thread CM linked, she was as nervous as the IPs (Intended Parents) but it all went well as you share common interests and passion (children and creating families). Some donors spend a long time getting to know people on internet sites before approaching possible IPs.

Unknown donation in general occurs through clinics where will be a waiting list of recipients hoping that their number comes up next. In some clinics the waiting list can be up to or longer than four years long, but people may be trying a range of paths to find their potential donor. With unknown ED the clinic do all the tests and the donor is not out of pocket as the IPs pay. In fact with all egg donation in Australia the point is to ensure there is no burden or limited burden on the donor. Payment is illegal in Australia but your reasonable costs are normally reimbursed (eg I paid for my sister's kid's childcare while she did the recent cycle etc) and you will have no medical fees to pay.

Danielle you mentioned not knowing how you would feel about 'attachment' to any resulting life that is created. We are all different in how we view life, creation and family. For many family is about love, caring, comfort and sharing a common heritage or history. For others it may be genetic or not. For my sister I think she put it so well when she said she considered donating her eggs as giving DH and I the potential to create life. That is we would create it from the cells she was able to give us.

There is also the issue of whether you wish to be a part of any resulting child's life. With known donation this is a growing phenomena but it by no means required - it is completely a personal decision for you and the IPs. When you meet or talk with IPs these are some of the things you will probably discuss. There is no right or wrong answer to any of these questions. But it is best to be true to your feelings or be at least open to exploring options you may not have thought about before. If you went through unknown donation I have heard that you can ask the clinic to ask the IP if they would be willing to meet you (before or after) and perhaps permit contact with them and the child.

The IVF process itself I described in the other thread and will copy over here for you.

The process you will go through is through IVF which involves a series of injections for about 9-12 days depending on how you respond to the drugs. There are many many women in the LTTTC threads on BB who can give you information on how to do it, what it is like, what to perhaps expect from the injections. My sister (who is my egg donor) reckons the needles are nothing at all. Especially compared to what she went through to birth her own children Something she is very proud of. In fact if you are relaxed you should feel almost nothing. Plucking your eyebrows is at least 10 times
worse. After having the injections you will have a procedure to remove the eggs from your ovaries via your vagina. Most clinics issue either a mild sedative to a twilight sedation which is like being under a short anaestetic. You will be able to go home after a few hours and rest up for a day or two.

Councelling is probably mandatory in most States you need to check with a local clinic to find the laws of your state. In our case it involved 3 sessions. One just DH and I, one my sis and her DH, and then one altogether. But in our case my BIL couldn't attend the final one due to work commitments but it was still fine to proceed. We also wrote up a letter of understanding on what and why we were doing this and what our expectations were for all scenarios we could think of. It was actually a fantastic way to find if there were any concerns or disparity in how we viewed different options.

Anyway if you have any other questions I am happy to try and answer them, but I hope this gives you a start to thinking about some of the issues.

It is an incredible gift to give, and while in my case it was my sister who donated, the donors I have come across are the most normal everyday women who have a passion to help and get much from the process and hopefully successful outcome.

[aussienic]

Thank you so much for that info..

I have always thought about ED but never whats involved. I worry about children being created from eggs one days meeting my own children and what if they get married or something? thats probably my biggest concern about it.

Can you donate your eggs of you have had your tubes tied?

[dusty]

No worries Nic

Like anything in life the unknown normally raises many questions and quite valid concerns that may be easily answered through talking and researching the issues. Clinics and their counsellors are able to give you more information and sometimes the best way is just start contacting them or reading stories and asking questions of IPs and other donor not necessarily with a view to donate to them but to learn from them.

ETA Whoops, missed your last question. the answer is tied tubes are not an issue, it is normally your age that is the biggest question. Some clinics limit the age for donors depending which State and which clinic. They push the boundary for known donations sometimes too. IVF bypasses your tubes so shouldn't be a prob.

[~breeze~]

Thanks so much dusty, you've given heaps of info & its very helpful

[SD2001]

If you live in NSW, I would also recommend reading the new "Assisted Reproductive Technology Bill 2007" legislation. It can be downloaded from here:

Assisted Reproductive Technology Bill 2007 - NSW Parliament

I suggest that you do read it, as it will apply to you and your family.

It will apply to all new "known" and "unknown" donors.

[KimB]

I have read this with great interest. I looked into being an egg donor many years ago and while I actually rang a clinic in my town about it (3 times actually) I never got a response back. I am now 40 and I know that they will consider my eggs old (lol still have no trouble getting pg though, my youngest is 6 months). Do you guys think it is still viable for me to check out becoming a donor again??

[briggsy's girl]

Kim - your age will potentially work against you for anon donation, but i'm not sure how it would go with known donation...

call the local clinic (again) and harrass them. either that, or check out their website (or the donor websites that are around - i'm sure you will find reference to them in this section) to get more information on age limits. from memory, for anon donation the age cut off is something like 35 or 38 - really not sure on known donation though

[dusty]

Kim - your age will potentially work against you for anon donation, but i'm not sure how it would go with known donation...

call the local clinic (again) and harrass them. either that, or check out their website (or the donor websites that are around - i'm sure you will find reference to them in this section) to get more information on age limits. from memory, for anon donation the age cut off is something like 35 or 38 - really not sure on known donation though

Kim it is lovely of you to consider such a generous act.

BG has offered excellent advice. Unfortunately once you are past 35 egg quality starts to decrease quite significantly and at 40 you will probably be considered too old (sorry!). However, it really depends on the situation and the clinic. My sister is my ED and she turns 37 this year.

Good luck in your endevours!

ETA: I am so sad to hear the clinic never got back to you. There are so few EDs in Australia and every possible donor is a precious gift. It is really irresponsible of them.

[KimB]

Thanks. I will look at some of the donor sites, you never know. As I said before I still have no problems getting pregnant so my eggs can't be too bad lol. It would be nice to think that I could help some other couples to achieve their dreams of having a family.

BG - when I phoned the clinic in my town, there were 0 donors at the time so I don't understand why they wouldn't have called me back.