wow... 9 years old... for me it would be a NO WAY kind of thing....
i did what i wanted to my hair around 13 or 14..... can't remember about shaving though... but certainly not 9.... i suppose for me it was around 12, when puberty started (what a fun time!!) - so yeah, for my daughter i would assume the same.... i would be pretty sad if she was aware of body hair etc at age 9, but i have noticed she does have quite a fine hairy line down her back (i am very hair-less) so maybe this sort of thing will bother her earlier....

i don't think i'd let her dye her hair until she could come up with some money to fund the continual trips to the hairdresser.... but age 9 - i am gob smacked.... i've started her at ballet dancing for 3-4 year olds but i am now having a semi heart attack over what this might lead to in 5 years time!!