Hi i am new to this site my Angel was born sleeping at 34 weeks on the 30/09/10 as my hubby goes back to work i am left sitting here thinking What next? This week allthough will be busy with my Angels funeral i just can't seem to get my head around the idea of life moving forward, having everthing for the next 3 years planned to now be left with the emptiness of not knowing.
I ask is it wrong for me to want to fall pregnant again soon?
It would just be nice to get some advice from someone that has gone through their own loss.
It's not wrong at all for you to want to be pregnant as soon as possible - I decided we would try again about five minutes after we were told our son had died. That's a bit fast, I'll admit, but it's very normal to have that feeling.
What next? That depends on you and how you deal with grief. I found trying to keep my head busy helped. I spent a lot of time online, writing about Ianto on my blog, looking up all the information I could about stillbirth and the causes, charities that deal with it (by the way, have you been in contact with the ACOCP? You should) and anything else I could think of. Other people deal with it differently. It's all up to you. I do urge you to spend some time here with us on bellybelly. We're all very friendly, and a lot (too many) of us know the pain of losing a child.
If you'd like to read my story (I found reading other stories helped me with my own grief) click on Ianto's name in my signature
It's now been two weeks since i was told there was no heart beat the time seems to go so quick friday is Angel's funeral and i find myself getting anxious friday will be the last time i can touch and see her it seems to make it all so final
reality has to set in i have to realise this has all happened and that on my due date i will not be getting my baby even though i do know this its like i still expect to wake up and for it all to be a dream.
i have had such a bad couple of days from having to deal with making all the arrangements to recieving photos from the hospital to then getting a phone call asking why i wasn't at my 36 week appointment. Just trying to find a dress to wear on friday was hard going from shop to shop trying on dresses having to look at my body over and over in them big mirrors to every dress making me look pregnant. I just want to lose that pregnant look instead of having that constant reminder of my lost Angel
What next?
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I am so so sorry for your loss, I think all your feelings are completely normal x
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