Do they calm down?

[Pip82]

As a teen my stepbrother would get sent for a run around the oval to clear his head, seemed to diffuse the situation.

[Cranky Kitten]

We ended up buying XP's son a punching bag and a weights bench - on the same principles, he'd go work out when he was feeling frustrated and overwhelmed, plus him hitting the punching bag was far better than him hitting his sister.

[Catastrophic]

Ah I hear you Tinks... Living with brothers of that age it sounds a little more calmer then what mums household is. Hugs xoxox. Eventually it happens and they turn into lovely men :P

[RainbowBrite]

I have two hormonal ones and two toddlers as well and I find copious amounts of vodka helps

I have the same but three toddlers...and it is cider here

My DS1 is nearly 15 and is the same, he can be a real bully to his younger brothers (8 and 10), they 'play' fight but the littler ones always end up in tears.
He is still polite and respectful to me and does listen (mainly when I yell) but I am having problems at school...he just doesn't care.
I think one of the underling issues for him is losing his dad last year...add hormone and your have a angsty (is that a word ) teenager.
My DD1 (16) is not to bad but she still screams at the others when they upset her.

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

Don't have a teenager, but work with them and have had theories coming out of my ears while I studied (just finished).

Other people have posted about exercise and that's great. If you can use some form of disciplined exercise even better - teamworking skills get built too. So going for a run is great for training, but sports like football build extra skills as well as exercise off the extra hormones. Gymnastics and dance are two other alternatives to ball sports. Martial arts can offer this and can be a good release for aggression, but maybe teaching teens to hit better isn't the best thing for everyone. Even group aerobics can encourage a group/team mentaility.

Sex hormones are steroid hormones, remember, so no wonder they go loopy. They do need an acceptable release.

[Pandora]

Art or music?
I favoured loud guitar playing with lots of feedback, to channel my teenage angst

[Cranky Kitten]

If you and the neighbours can stand it, drums - loud *and* physical

[Pandora]

If you and the neighbours can stand it, drums - loud *and* physical

And electric drums come with headphones, and are almost as physical but a lot less loud.
DH is a drummer

[Tinks]

Really? How much do they cost?

[peanutter]

in terms of trying to get him to realise his behaviour, have you tried using your phone or camera to record him when he's doing it, and then sitting down with him and watching it together, when he's calm?

people are often really, really surprised to see how they've behaved etc when in a rage (or drunk, drug affected, etc) and actually showing them can be so much more powerful than telling them. And hearing your girls tell him how it made them feel after watching it back may also be quite powerful.

Not that the point is to give him a guilt trip, but if he feels convicted, then he'll have more strength to catch himself and modify his behavour next time.

And while martial arts may be about fighting, it's not about violence - discipline combined with physical exertion might be the perfect combo for him, to get rid of some of that teen angst and pent up frustration...

good luck!!

[misty]

Tinks - He sounds exactly like my brother was as a teenager. I know my mum was at her wits end with him. It also sound scarily like my DH was to his family when we were teenagers. Unfortunately I cann't offer any advice - not being at that stage myself yet. The only thing I can say is that he will eventually grow out of it (albeit my DH and my bro were both in their 20's before they grew up) - hang in there. Hopefully someone else will have some more practical advice - it sounds like there are a few people going through the same thing.

[Pandora]

Really? How much do they cost?

I will ask him. He may have industry connections too, but not sure. I will find out.

And, on the throwing thing, dont get a marble chess set. I dont mean to be flippant either, i have seen someone hit with a knight and it wasnt pretty.

[Tinks]

Thanks for the heads up Pandora! He has been known to throw chess pieces I wonder if they make balsa wood ones? (and i i've spelt balsa properly)