1. you've given her her own space, her own privacy and you invaded it by checking in her "place", I assume you didn't ask permission to enter
2. she is doing something illegal and quite possibly something that will damage her brain function.
For point 1, that is something you will have to deal with, both the betrayal of you being somewhere you shouldn't and of her having something she shouldn't have
For point 2, I'd contact drug arm (or some such organisation), get some information on drug use and developing brains. Give this information to her. Talk to her calmly, not only from the point of it being illegal, that possession & use of it can lead to convictions, but of the damage it can do to her body.
Thanks Sop but my DD does know all this. We are very open and can talk to all the kids about anything. Unfortunately my dad is also into weed and she knows this too. I have told her that Pop has been in prison for it but when she stayed over the other day (after warning Dad about giving her any smokes, alcohol or drugs) she came home and told me that Pop has been to prison for driving offences My dad used to be the local dealer and I knew damn well what he was up to as all my friends older brothers and sisters used to buy from him and the police used to raid us every year. I think she is just one of those kids that has to learn the hard way. At least we have taken pregnancy off the cards by having the implant put in (age 14 due to risky behaviour then)
Will start looking at rearranging the living quarters again
I can see how that would be a tough situation to try and get the point across - I was raised in a very sheltered, strictly drug- and scandal-free household and still grew to see drugs as no big thing because of the friends I hung out with - and most of them got their casual attitude towards drugs from their own parents, some of whom were dealers, or would buy for us, or would smoke with us etc...
And just to throw another spanner in your works, how long has she had the implant in? It pays to watch very carefully if she's got any emotional/depression issues or has a tendency towards emotional instability (and there's not many 16yo girls out there who don't fit that description...) - the Implanon can trigger depression and suicidal ideation, so keep a very close eye on that one. One physical sign to watch for is weight gain (mine was very rapid, people commented on it a lot), and try to continue being as open with her as you have been, watch for signs of emotional disurbance or depression (withdrawal, anger, acting out etc) and contact your GP if you have any concerns. x
Glamourcide - she was 14 when we had the implant put in as she was drinking and engaging in risky behaviour. Our GP, after explaining the danger she was putting herself in, had a go at her and it didn't do anything. I worry about her weight but not because of a gain but because she has an eating disorder. We have battled anorexia and bulimia since she was 9. We still are battling along but some months are better than others. Our GP has been our GP since DD was 18 months old so knows her very well.
Hang in there, Kim... the teen years can be so tough. It sounds like you're doing absolutely everything you can to ensure she stays safe and well regardless of the choices she's making. I just thought I'd put it out there as my mum got me the Implanon at 16 or 17 and I ended up 30kgs heavier, on anti-depressants and suicidal - and I didn't have any idea the Implanon played a part in all that until many years later, so I thought you should know if you didn't already that it does have its risks It's great that you have such an awesome GP who takes a personal interest in your DD's wellbeing - very rare these days to have someone you can trust!
All I can say is that we're here for you, and it appears to me that you're doing everything in your power to be there for your DD and protect her if she won't be guided through these difficult years. I was a lot like her, just had to make my own screw-ups and learn the hard way and I'm glad I came through it all okay. I'm sure with you and your DH behind her, your DD will, too - it's just really tough to try and enforce rules that are for her own good, and watch her get caught up in risky behaviours and know that she's at an age where all you can really do is be there for her when she wants/needs you. Keep holding on, you will all get there. xx
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My dad used to be the local dealer and I knew damn well what he was up to as all my friends older brothers and sisters used to buy from him and the police used to raid us every year. I think she is just one of those kids that has to learn the hard way. At least we have taken pregnancy off the cards by having the implant put in (age 14 due to risky behaviour then)
It's great that you have such an awesome GP who takes a personal interest in your DD's wellbeing - very rare these days to have someone you can trust!
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