How much freedom for a 16.5 year old DD?

[blackduckies]

Thanks girls..
BG not the Don but fairly close they have 4 girls all very similar in age living there 2 are daughters, 1 is a granddaughter and my DD. Earlier this year they had another girl there same sort of thing.
It's really weird it seems like they are trying to keep her from me, every time you see her they send one of the girls with her???
I dropped into c'link to find out whatever I could and the woman was in there bagging me saying we kicked her out and would'nt hand over her things ID etc, when she seen me she came up to admire PoppyI just said we did'nt kick her out and she is welcome home anytime so we won't be saying we did, her reply you have to say that to get more money???!!!!!! She told DD that board was $190 a fortnight, but after not getting homeless youth allowance she has reduced it to $50 a week, surprised me I thought they would tell her she could'nt stay with them then. Maybe they are getting it out of her in labour???

We moved her from a private school to the local High school thinking she needed to have the option of TAFE not just uni, bad move!!! She started work at Mac Donalds and met lots of older kids, they all seem nice, but older. She got invited to a 21st birthday party!!! Weekend in Melbourne going to the show and then they were going to stay at a youth hostel and nightclub. When I tried to explain that she was'nt old enough she blew up, we let her go to the show and she stayed overnight with family. I think thats good for 16.
Then it really started I did'nt know where she was and who she was with, boys 18+ were dropping by the house and next thing she would be off in the car. I don't really know them and she was'nt really prepared for us to get to know them, one day we came home and one of the guys was in the house (lounge room) but we do'nt know him.
At the end of the day pregnancy is'nt the biggest worry, it's getting killed or injured in a car crash, into drugs and alchol in a big way, Aids or some other disease and loss of opportunity. We want her to have something, we have savings accounts for all the kids to be used for something useful like a deposit on a house (very affordable down here)and she had been saving toward the same goal, it's not looking that good anymore.

Thanks for the thoughts again< I think if she does come home we need to have a plan we all agree to. We are on good terms which is weird, she texts me about litttle things and they often end in Luv U xxxxx I just feel helpless and hate where she has gone to live, nothing particulaly wrong with it just very differnet to here. Also don't want the little ones growing up not really knowing her, that makes me cry.

[mrsmac]

Huge hugs Pam, I know how hard it is when they don't live with you. I hope and pray she comes back to you, we have been so happy since my DD came back from my dad's and the break did everybody good. She is more receptive of our rules and we are relaxing more with them. AS DH says we can't punish her for things she hasn't done and she has been sensible so far.