Ahhh Lulu you're a fabbo mum and I too would be reticent about rewarding bad behaviour so absolutely agree that she should put in towards her formal.

BUT principles aside, if she hasn't earnt any pocket money for three years then she's obviously not bothered and I don't think you're going to see a change overnight.

The only thing I can think of is that you reiterate your views on her cash contributon but give her the chance to say how she would like to earn that pocket money and give her some input into saying what jobs she's willing to do so that she doesn't feel that she's "losing" by starting to unload the dishwasher/feed the cats. If she won't meet you halfway, I think I'd just say sorry love, you're not going then. But you've probably already tried that!