I was brought up drinking and guess what - drunken teen here too. Lack of alcohol at home doesn't make a drunken teen.

And it doesn't matter if I choose to (legally) allow my child alcohol in my home or not - if you don't for whatever reason then respect to you. Just as I would expect you to respect my decision. And if my DS got drunk at a party he'd be told off, just as yours would. Drinking a wine with dinner isn't the same as getting drunk and shouldn't ever be considered the same.