:-( Shan, it really is tough when you hear of others happy news, particularly when that is all you want too. Please don't feel bad for how you feel, better that you talk about those feelings rather than bottle them up. I am sure like bubno3 said, as a friend she would have known how hard it would have been for you to hear her news. I went through all sorts of emotions constantly when people told me they were expecting - inital happiness, then sadness for me & my family, to anger etc.... hopefully you won't have to wait too much longer for an earthside bubba