Ovulex

Hi Mummy2chloe and Munchy,

sorry haven't really been up to doing much the past week, feeling much better now and have been keeping up to date with you guys.

mummy2chloe,
so happy for you, i :pray: you have the :bfp: very soon. this may seem like the longest 2 weeks of your life i know i did, but fingers crossed it will be well worth it.

munchy,
its great to know that you are not being made redundant. at least you can relax now maybe this will help your cycle aswell. did you say af is due 1st nov? i'll have my finger crossed for you aswell. i hope to see 2 :bfp: when i go online next week!!

not a lot has been happening with me lately. iv'e had my good days and bad days. i've started my weight watchers diet today. iv'e put on loads of wieght round my belly and for my injections to work well next month i think i should lose a bit. i just hope i ca stick to it.

i'm still on mat leave but really missing work. i can't go back just yet cos i won't get paid when i start my fertility treatment again and have to be off every other day with scans. i'm too used to my luxuries to try and budget on DH's pay! hopefully if i do get pg then 30 wks of bedrest for me.

it's been so good hearing your positive news. take care
sofy x x

Hi sofy

its great to hear from you was woundering where you had got to glad to hear you are feeling better about things i pray we all get a BFP real soon as to work take as much time as you need i went back after 8 wks from the day of finding out all her problems which when i look at it isnt a long time really considering i had to have lots of scans at a special hospital in london and have the needle thing put through my tummy to stop my baby girls heart (that was the hardest thing ever) and then give birth and have the funeral and move house it was hard time when i think back to it. well i hope it all works out for you honey i have everything crossed for you aswell and hope the diet goes well i was with slimming world but gave up ages ago i realy need to loose some weight i just find it so hard.

Mummy2chloe

i went to the docs at last and i have a bt booked in for next tue which will look at my hormones and everything and then on day 21 of cycle they want to do another bt to make sure i am ovulating if they all come back good then there is no reason for me not to fall pregnant i said to him what about my weight and he said i am only 23 so it shouldnt matter he said if i was in my 40s and was overweight then maybe it could be my weight so that made me feel a little better but i still really do need to loose a couple of stone at least i want to loose 7 in total but start off at one at a time i suppose also i hope you have some good news to be telling me soon.

Munchy xxx

Hey munchy and sofy

Munchy thats great news about the doc, with any luck the bt that they are doing will reveal something so they can get you back on track and making gorgeous babies again. please let me know how you go, i will be thinking of you. how is the weight loss going?? like you said take it one step at a time i am so proud of you :clap:

Sofy how are you going hun?? its great to see you back in here posting
thanks so much for your best wishes and i totally agree with you the tww sucks big time

well as for me, not much to report really. i have been using the pesseries and they are still yukky, i have put on 4 kilos in one week, i have cramps i am bloated and my boobs are huge. but these are all the side effects of the pessaries. I dont think we are pregnant, i have been through a few iui now and i feel the same as the others cycles, so i dont think we are pregnant. but in a way a feel ok about that. i sort of feel like i am coming to the end of my road with ttc, i have been at it for almost 6yrs now and i am sick of it, i want to get my old life back. i should be focusing on the gorgeous child i have and not focus on the one i cant have. i am so god dam luck to have such an awesome daughter so i think its time to give up on ttc and just enjoy my life with my dd & dp, does that make sense??
will stop talking now sorry

i really hope you girls start getting bfp

cant wait to hear from you

take care

Hi mummy2chloe

i totally no what you mean about coming to the end of your TTC i have only been trying for a yr and there has been times where i thought i just want to give up it takes over your life i find all i do is talk about it saying to everyone i wish i was pregnant it is hard maybe you could take a break for a yr and think about trying i really really hope you get your bfp 6 yrs is a long time you deserve it so much i have everything crossed for you. i cant wait to find out whats going on with my i came on on fri but my af are so much better not as heavey they seem to be different the last 2 af's now have been good not to heavey and only lasting 5 days instead of 7 so fingers crossed it means that my body is sorting itself out. as to dieting havent started yet my friends mum done a diet through her gp it costs 1000 pounds which is an awful lot but it is for 14 wks and you can loose like 4 stone you cant have any food only the sahats they give you which are shakes and soups and nut bars and you have councelling every week and group theropy and they train you how to eat peoperly so i might do it just need to have a serious think about it. also i had to go docs again as my hand swelled up i have RSI repetative strain injury so have to wear a splint it is very annoying also i decorated my kitchen over the weekend and guess what colour it is PINK i thought it was cream with a hint of pink but now it is on the walls it is deffinaltly pink but looks so good i love it so much just need to do tilling now anyway i keep talking so i will shut up now ha ha let me know how your getting on also when can you do a HPT?

Munchy xxx

Hi Ladies,

Mummy2chloe

If there isn't no AF there still could be some good news. with regards to giving up trying to conceive. i totally understand where your coming from. my dh and i decided to stop after 5yrs of trying, just before we started our last cycle and guess what we conceived with Mustafa our little angel! maybe he was a sign not to give up... but, only you and dp can decide what you want i know it kinda takes over your life and you talk to everyone about pregnancy. iv'e got great friends who tell me to shut up when i get to the annoying point. who knows maybe the brerak might relax you and being stress free is being part of the medication cycle if that makes sense.

take care ladies, fingers crossed for you both

sofy
xxx

hey girls

just a quick one from me to let you know that af arivved today:cry:

i knew she was coming for last few days, could just feel it:(

definantly giving ttc a break for awhile, but will come on bb everyday and will still be in here talking to you lovely ladies
cant go anywhere yet anyway, not until you girls get bfp and then i might have to stalk you over in the preggers section, wont be able to post in there cos i am not pregnant but i will still be able to read your post and keep an eye on you:)

ok girls, chop chop lets get you preggers:D

Mummy2chloe

oh honey :hug: i really thought this was your month i had everything crossed for you hope your not feeling to sad it is so dissapointing when your AF arrives well i dont blame you with giving the TTC a little break as it does get in the way of everything you will probably start to feel a little better and feel like you are starting to get your life back again iykwim. well i feel a little down today i have been feeling a little down for a few days and then realised what day it is today it is a yr that my little girl should have been born 12 nov was my due date so if only she had being born it would have been her 1st birthday just cant stop thinking about her and feel like everyone has forgotten about her does that make sense. also i went through all of harveys toys to make room for christmas ones and i came across alot of baby ones so i was putting them all in the loft and harvey asked why i said to save them incase you have a brother or sister one day i just feel sad for him as well that he is missing out on having his little sister around god i am chocking up sorry guys just wanted to say how i was feeling i had better go now at work and dont want to be crying. also my doc said my blood test for hormones were all normal which i was really surprised at but its good news i suppose just gotta find out if i am ovulating now.

Munchy xxx

oh munchy

:hugs: today must be a hard day for you, wish i could be there for you, i completely understand what you are saying about your gorgeous little girl and not wanting her to be forgotten, but with everything you have told me about, with the tattoo and the christmas present you wanted dh to get you that would remind you of her, with all that there is no way your little girl will ever be forgotten, maybe the people that are close to you might not want to mention it incase it makes it harder on you, as it is they would already know that your having a hard time with ttc and your work plus your trying to lose weight, they might not want to make things harder on you by bringing it up, so they might be waiting to see if you bring it up and if your up for talking about it and stuff do you know what i mean??

as for feeling sad about not having a bro/sis for harvey i truely understand what your saying, chloe is always saying to me, "when we have a baby i am going to bath it and feed it and push the pram" and it just breaks my heart cos she is nearly 6 by the time i have a baby "if" i ever have a baby chloe will be grown up, i always wanted to have my kids close in age but that was taken out of my hands many years ago.

its good that your hormones are fine, thats something you can cross off your list, like you said lets see how or if your ovulating, you know how to tell when your ovulating and stuff?? you know with your cervical mucus? are you into charting your cycle?? do you have any ovulation kits?? if you dont maybe you should buy some so you can keep an eye on when your going to O.

best of luck please keep in touch i am always thinking about you sweetie

take care hun

Mummy2chloe

Thanks for your reply you have said all of the right things my family are probably waiting for me to say something the thing is i hate crying infront of people as i dont want to make people around me feel sad i think its my problem and i dont want to burden them with it i am the sort of person who puts on a front and acts all happy when deep down i am falling apart. i think i am just having a bad day and will probably feel alot better 2morrow. what you said about chloe i would cry so much i feel like you that harvey will be all grown up by the time i have another baby i always wanted 3 yr between my kids which would have been if brooklyn was healthy but hopefully i will fall pregers soon i had a couple of O tests that my friend gave me and i done them for the first 2 months and they came up that i was O so i think i still do but i might go and buy some and start doing it again. well tonight i am going to help my sister decorate but i want to avoid it cos i think i will just be feeling upset and will drag her down with me but i no she really needs help decorating her bedroom so i think i will go.

take care honey

munchy xxx

hey munchy

i know what you mean about putting on a front, i am doing it now ( not with you of course) i just had a failed cycle AGAIN and none of my family or friends understand why i am STILL upset, they must think that you just get over it in a matter of a day or two, i mean oh my god i still have af so every time i go to the toilet its a bloody reminder that it didnt work, it just seems easier to put on a happy face and pretend that your fine rather then let them see that your heart is breaking to the point that it hurts to breath, and not just that the replies that you get from people when they find out that your not pregnant just p*sses me off, i hate people say "oh well just relax it will happen eventually" my god i could just slap these people for saying that, but anyway i wont keep going on, i think you understand what i am saying ha ha ha

as for getting more O kits, thats a great idea it will help and you wont have to do the guessing game when your close to ovulating, i think you can buy like a 20 or 30 pack on ebay for cheap

and as for going to your sisters to help decorate her bathroom, it might be a good idea to go over there, at least it gets you out of the house and you never know it might be your sisters way of trying to help you get through this very tough day, plus it might give you an opportunity to have a heart to heart with your sister about everything thats going on in your life and about brooklyn, you never know you go over to your sisters feeling very sad and down and you might end up leaving feeling alot better and maybe a little closer to your sister, but darling if you feel that your not up for going out and you would rather be at home, then i understand that aswell, maybe you ,dh and harvey could do something tonight, to show brooklyn that she is still very much appart of your lives and that the love and bond that you feel for her is still VERY much there.

sweet heart if you want to pm me please feel free to, i will always be here for you ok no matter what.

let me know how you go, i will be thinking of you mate
stay stong darlin

Mummy2chloe

hello chicken i am feeling alot better today it sounds like you are totally on my wave lengh of thinking its nice when someone understands. what you were saying about not being pregers it is so annoying when people say just relax it will happen or dont think about it so much how can you not when its the one thing you want more than anything and as to the AF reminding you everytime you go to the toilet that is hard as when i had to go into the hospital to give birth to brooklyn they put these tablets up me and she said when you start bleeding it means things are starting to happen so i went to the toilet and on my way there was a bunch of healthy pregnant people having a hospital tour to see where they will be going when they give birth anyway i went to the toilet and they smiled at me and i thought i am not hear for a good reason so i went to toilet and saw the blood and all i wanted to do was curl in a ball and cry but no i could see a the bottom of the door shadows and hear the people who were on there tour so i held it in and now when i have my af all i think about is that and the fact i havent falen again. god it is hard when i think in detail of what i had to go though it was a long few months of scans appointments and the birth and then the funeral and that i just wish it was somehting i never had to do. i went to my sisters last night and i told her a few things she forgot it was brooklyns due date so did dh but she helped alot also felling so down about my weight my sister said i sound like i am full of guilt and blaming myself for absoultly everything and sound loney which i am not but at the same time i feel like i try to deal with things on my own if that makes sense but she is gonna diet with me which will help and i will go and buy some O tests today as i will be O soon so hopefully i will fall this month. sorry to rave on again anyway i am also hear for you if you are feeling crapy about your cycle not working it is so dissapointing and like you say people really dont help with there insensitive comments they proably mean well but they just dont understand. i had better go as i am finnishing work now so have to take puppy for walk and then get harvey from school speak soon lovey.

Munchy xxx

hey munchy

i am so happy that your feeling better:D that is so sweet that your sister is going to diet with you, it always makes it easier when someone is doing it with you, and you will be suprised at how your life will change when you start losing weight, you will get your confidence back, you will start to love your body again which is a great thing cos i am sure you feel that it is letting you down, you will feel more sexy and people will pick up on that, it will beam from you and hey if your feeling a whole lot sexier then thats gotta be good for ttc cos you will always be dtd :p

just think this is the start of a new life for you, i am so excited for you darl.
i am going away tomorrow for 4 days so if i dont answer back you know why, but as soon as i get home i will jump back on here and see how your going. sorry that this post isnt very long just short on time, trying to clean the house and pack cloths. just know that i will be thinking of you ( i always am)

take it easy and i will be back soon

see ya darl

Mummy2chloe

going away ah hope you are having a good time a nice break away i feel like i could do with another holiday ha ha. i went to buy some O tests but they are so expensive so i am gonna go on ebay and see if i can get some cheap ones on there fingers crossed they have some as to dieting i will be starting that 2morrow i went and got the slim fast stuff last night so i am hoping i like it as i am a really fussy eater i just cant wait to feel good about myself and have the confidence i would love to feel attractive again as i think when you feel attractive everything else follows like the confidence and being able to wear nice clothes and feeling good in the bedroom as thats one thing i wont go on top as its like my whole body is on display and he can see evrything and he is not a;oud to touch my tummy that is a no go area but hopefully i will start to feel good about myself soon, i had better get myself some scales so i can start weighing myself. i just think the my weight is my biggest problem and if i get that sorted then things will fall in place if that makes sence i want to loose 8 stone altogether i no it sounds alot but i would love to loose that much but would be happy with 6 stone but i will do 1 at a time anyway i am gonna go i have a bad headache i think i am worrying about my dentist appointment later i am having a filling and they are injecting my gum so it dont hurt but i hate needles expecially in the mouth i am so scared :boohoo: anyway speak when you are back take care honey.

Munchy xxx

hi munchy and mummy2chloe,

i havent been ignoring your posts i check them in my inbox a few times a week. i'm not good at expressing my feelings even when the thoughts are in my head, they come out all wrong. so, i thought i would take a back seat and just think of you in my prayers. i realy do hope you feel better soon.

i hav an appt on friday with the infertility specialist so i thought i would be prepared and take a hpt and i couldn't beleive it when it was positive. i had all the dates planned in my head for when to start my injections and when i would ovulate it came as a massive shock. i still can't really beileve it i feel as though i am going to wake up any minute! i went for a blood test yesterday and that confirmed i am about 3-4 wks. i go again on friday to make sure my hormones are doing the right thing.

i pray that this has cheered you up rather than upset you, only i know too well your happy for other people but it hurts more inside. im sorry guys i feel guilty but i felt i had to tell you.

i hope you have a great well desrevd holiday mummy2chloe.

take care
luv sofy
x x x

Sofy

Wow congratulations honey :happyforyou::happyforyou::happyforyou::happyforyo u::happyforyou::happyforyou::happyforyou::happyfor you: i am so happy for you well done to you i bet you are so so happy and dont feel guilty you are so silly i am over the moon that it has worked out for you, you deseve it i really pray that you have a lovely healthy pregnancy and that you will soon be holding your little bub in your arms. i bet you were so shocked when it came out positive let hope me and mummy2chloe follow ah. well done again i am so excited i cant wait for the day when i find out i am preggers.

take care and look after yourself and make sure you give us updates of how your getting on.

Munchy xxx

Dear munchy, I gotta tell ya, I'm following this thread with interest--
Have you actually started the Ovulex yet? And if so, how is it going--like are your cycles more regular, etc.
I just started taking Optivite this week. It's a multivitamin especially for women to make their cycles more regular. But this is NOT an endorsement, because I don't know if it's working yet, LOL!
(I'm waiting for AF #2 after MC and my temps are all over the place this cycle). Good luck to everybody.

hey munchy,

thanks, i'm so glad your okay ill be :pray: for you both nxt month you will see a :bfp: and happiness will def come your way.

i've had blood test to check my hormones are doing the right thing ill get my results later today so :crossfingers: my body's working.

got to go now im taking care of my neice for a while so handsful.

take care
sofy
x

hey munchy and sofy

I am back from holidays and OH MY GOD sofy that is so great darling i am so so so happy for you sweet, i want to hear all the details, how far are you? are you feeling ms yet?? wow this is so awesome my love, now dont you go away and leave us just cos your preggers we still want to hear from you and with any luck having you in hear might rub off on munchy and i and we might get pregnant :dance:

munchy

how did you go at the dentist honey?? hopefully its all fixed for you now? i hate dentist aswell. i think the diet that your on is the same the my dp is on and he has lost 6 kilos so far, and he doesnt seem to be struggling with it at all, he loves all the flavors of the shakes and stuff so thats a good thing, and absolutely loves the bars they give you, he said he could eat them all day he isnt real keen on the soups though, so he just has his 2 shakes and a meal. so how are you going with it??

was so nice to get away for a few days, we took dd to dreamworld and she had the best time, plus we went to the big shopping centres and oh my god i just couldnt believe how many shops there were, and to see all the big buildings when we were driving around, it was just so great, cos we are from the country we dont have big buildings or huge shopping malls, i was like a kid in a candy shop, but it was lots of fun, spent to much money and ate lots of junk food but it was all worth it. anyway i better go unpack

take care

Hi girls sorry i havent replied for a while i was signed off work from docs cos of my rsi in my hand i so wished i had a laptop on my week off i would have been on hear all day ha ha well forst of all

TM - i started ovulex 3 months ago and it has definatly made a change in my cycles it has made them regular and they are not heavey anymonre and last for 5 days instead of 7 to 8 so thats good and i had a hormone test done at docs and everything is good there as well just waiting on the results to see if i am ovulating now but i think ovulex are good i just wish they would get me pregnant.

Sofy - how did the blood test go honey also like mummy2chloe said tell us everything how far gone you are etc hope it is all going well for you.

Mummy2chloe - sounds like you had a real good time away as to big buildings and that we have loads of them hear we never used to but where i live is changing rapidly its know as the new city where everyone wants to go i hate it though i prefer it to be quite i dont like busy places. funny how us girls love shopping ah i am the same i have almost finnished my christmas shopping i am a very organised person alot of them are wrapped up as well i cant wait to put my tree up on sat 1st dec i got harvey a little one for his bedroom he is so excited to put it up bless him everything he sees on telly at the min he wants for christmas i just sit there and say ok we will have to see what santa brings for you. my dentist trip was ok had my filling they numbed my face which felt really weird but at least it is over with now wasnt half as painful as what i thought it would be. as to diet was going well i dont really like the shakes but love the bars and the soups i fell of it on weekend i might go back to doing the slimming world diet as it suits me better i think my problem is sticking to anything but as to excersise i have been doing an extra 7 hr walking a week so surely that will help i dont have any scales to weigh myself i will have to go buy some. so did you get any christmas bits when you were away with all them big shops around?

Munchy xxx

Dear munchy, sorry to hear you weren't well lately. Hope you're feeling better.

You're probably going to get weary of reading my questions, but I had to ask. Does the doctor know you're on ovulex? and If so, when are you supposed to go off it? The reason I ask is because you said there were herbs in it and I was wondering if any of them are bad for baby and if you have to stop taking it right after you ovulate or if it's safe through your whole pregnancy...

Hi Tm

the ovulex i got them shiped over from america and they are all herbal i only told my doctor about them 2 wks ago as i was having a hormone test so thought i had better tell him but he didnt really say anything about them also you take 2 everyday an hour before bed and if you were to fall pregnant then you stop taking them. i dont think there is anything that will harm your baby but i am not 100% i just no that the herbs help your body get ready for pregnancy such as hormones and make you ovulate for longer hope that has helped a bit i you can ask as many questions as you like i dont mind. so are you thinking of getting some?

Munchy xxx

hi ladies,

i got my blood reports bcak on friday it seems im 5wks and my hormones are doing what they should, which is a relief. ive got a scan boked in for friday 30th nov. im already on bed rest soim bored out my brains. i've asked dh to buy me a laptop so i'm not so bored. sopke to the prematurity prevention clinic doctor and i'll be booked in for a cervical cerclage within the next 6 weeks.

enough about me! hope you ladies are well. how are you xmas preparations getting on, not long left.

take care, ill keep you updated as and wheni can.

sofy
xxx

hey girls

sofy thats great new on bt results, thank you so much for coming back in and letting us know how you are going, we are always thinking about you and are so very happy for you my sweet, now you rest up and cant wait to hear from you soon

Munchy how are you going hun?? most of my chrissy shopping is on layby i have almost finished paying them off ( 2weeks should be all paid for) and i will then wrap them all up, i cant wait. i have started to really put on the weight lately most of my cloths are starting to get tight, i am wearing dp shirts to hide my fat ha haha i am a sor tof disappointed at myself as i worked so hard to lose the 25kilos and now i have gone and put 10kilos back on, but it feels that i am in the spot that i just dont care right now, i sort of hate my body , sick of it failing everytime iukwim but then i am sick of always worrying about my weight and for the last 2 mths its been great as i ate what i wanted and it felt good not to be worrying all the time about my weight, but now i feel like sh*t cos i have put on weight, look and feel terrible hahah ahhhh its a cruel cycle isnt it. anyway enough about that, its my birthday in 3 weeks and cant wait, we are going out for dinner and i am having lots and lots of drinks he he he plus i think we are planning on going away for the night which will be soooo nice. what are you guys doing for chrissy?? are you going away of staying home?? we are going to my sisters who just lives outside of town so it will be nice not having to travel.

tempus moriendi how are you going?? how is the Optivite treating you? do you think its helping you with your cycles?? i wonder if its got the same sort of ingrediants in them as ovulex??

take care girls

SOfy - glad to hear bt was good and make sure you rest up like docs say just think before you no it you will be holding your beautiful baby and hopefully by that time us other girls will be preggers.

Mummy2chloe
i am so excited about christmas im not sure what you mean by layby but i take it its like a thing where you pick the pressies pay them off then recevie them or am i wrong sorry just never heard of it before ha ha. sorry to hear you are feeling crapy about your weight i can say i definatly no how you feel on that front it would be so nice to be able to eat what we want without having to worry about piling on the pounds ah. and you are so right it is such a visous cycle i hate the way i look right now i would do anything to feel attractive again and get my confidence back i have quite low confidence and self esteem at the min i always say to hubby that i feel like i look like a man i no its sounds funny but i do i saw my councellor last week i thought it would be my last session and she turns round and says i am suffering with deppresion i didnt think i was there was a few times where it crossed my mind so i was telling my sis and she said we have known that for ages you have been like it since loosing the baby i said why didnt anyone mention it to me she said we thought you new anyway i dont no what to do about it now i dont feel bad all the time but when i do have a down day i get really down and want to be on my own and then my anixioty comes out has anyone else got this? soprry to rave on honey. So its your birthday in 3 weeks i bet you cant wait what day is you actual birthday sounds like you will have a nice day will be nice to stay away for a night and do some baby making ha ha. also christmas day i have my dad and sis with her bf and her kids all coming over for dinner so that will be nice gonna stay home all day and just enjoy watching harvey play with his toys and then do visits on boxing day and usaly my friends come see harvey on boxing day to give him his pressies i have got him loads this yr but to be honest i buy him stuff all the time i never used to my councellor said i am over compensating because of loosing brooklyn i must admit when i lost her a week after i took harvey to toys r us and spent about £100 on toys for him as it made me feel better anyway i will stop now keep babling on.

Munchy xxx

munchy: I was surprised to hear that Ovulex is made in America--that's where I live! Actually, I think a lot of docs are still very ignorant about herbs and what they can do. But every once in awhile you find one who's quite savvy. And yes, I might try Ovulex some time. I just like hearing what other women use and how it works for them.
btw, when you said about buying your son a bunch of new toys after your loss, I totally understood. Obstetric loss makes you appreciate more what you already have.

sofy: I can understand your boredom. But you know it's for a good cause. After the cerclage, will you be allowed to resume your normal activities?

mummy2chloe: I started taking the Optivite a week and a half into this cycle, so it's too early to tell how it's working. It's supposed to be especially good for women who have short luteal phases, and I've only had two days of elevated temps so far (you know--elevated temps after you ovulate should last 14 days then AF starts). My other issue is my mucus drying up 5 days before my temp goes up, so I seem to be very out of sync. On the other hand, I'm only taking one Optivite a day (recommended dose is 2-6/day) because I wanted to see if I had any weird reactions to it--I'm also on synthroid for my thyroid. When AF starts I will up the dose to 2 a day. No, it doesn't have any herbs, just loads of vitamins and minerals and nutrients.
btw, I know how frustrating the whole weight loss roller coaster can be. Good luck with it all, but remember, people can love you just the way you are (to quote Mr. Rogers) even if your body isn't the "perfect" weight!!!

hey munchy

sorry i sometimes forget that we are in different countries he he he, layby is exactly what you said, pick something pay it off then pick it up. sorry to hear that your suffereing from depression my darling :hug: are they going to put you on depressants?? i suffered pnd ( Post natal depression) after chloe was born but never relised i had it till she was almost 6mths old, i didnt feel in myself depressed or anything, i loved my daughter and was so happy and blessed that i had finally had a child, the only sign i had was i couldnt stop crying but i thought it was because of all the hormones and just everything catching up with me, i went to gp and he said that depression comes in all different signs, he put me on 50mg of zoloft and the change in me after about a week was amazing and yes my anxiety was pretty bad before i went to doctor, i was always scared that i was going to do something wrong, like when i dress her i was worried i would hurt her and stuff like that but once i was on the tablets things settled down so much.
Please let me know how you go, i will always be here for you if you need to talk.
My birthday is on the 20th december and i truely cant wait to get away for the night and go out for dinner, its going to be nice.
i know what you mean about buying stuff for the kids when they probably dont need it, i am always buying chloe stuff and honestly she is spoilt i know it but i just cant help it, it does make you feel better.

tempus moriendi with any luck now that you know that you wont suffer any side effects from the Optivite your next cycle you can up the dose and it might start working things out for you, so can you take optivite and ovulex at the same time?? maybe that might help??? really hope you receive a bfp very soon. do you have any kids already??

TM - its funny that there from america and you didnt know i am from england and they dont do them over hear the only way to get them is on the net but not sure if they do them in shops in america. well i really hope ovulex works and hope that your optivite works and we get our BFP i just cant wait for that day its seems hard to imagine that i will ever be pregnant again.

Mummy2chloe
Yeh i was right with the layby thing i forget we are in different contries at times but then i dont think there is many people from england on this site i no that sofy is but thats all i no of. about the depression i didnt think i was depressed either i no i am alot more short tempered and have my down days i just thought it was to do with the loss of brooklyn and it was just me grieving but saying that my mum had depression at my age which is weird but i no it can run in the family im not sure what to do about it yet as i havent told my doc that my councellor said that i really dont want to take tablets if i am TTC but i really want to feel better in myself i will have to speak to docs and see what they say. so birthday is 20th i asked cos my dads is on the 17th so is you star sign a sagaterius cos thats what my dad is i am a taurus and a typical one ha ha. i hope your birthday is good my dad has harvey friday night so me and DH are getting a curry and a film and have a cosy night in i am due on around then so no baby making unfortunatly. and about buyong kids toys i am so bad i will have to stop it cos i dont want him to turn out a spoilt brat at the min i spoil him so much but i dont want him to get to a teenager and think he can have everything so i will try and put my foot down a little bit with it. also i am so excited about saturday gonna put chirstmas tree up when do you put yours up on the 1st as well.

Munchy xxx

munchy

my dads birthday is on the 17th too ha ha ha and yeah my dad and i are both sagaterius. we usually put our tree up on the 1st dec but we just couldnt wait so we put it up the other day. as for depression i am pretty sure there are some anti depressants that you can take that are safe while ttc ( i think there is but not quiet sure) just have a good old talk to your gp and tell them what your councellor said and try and work out something that you can take that is safe whilst ttc.
that is so good that your dad is going to take harvey for you guys so you can get out for a while, i really hope you have a lovely night, its always nice to go out everynow and then.

take care

Mummy2chloe

that is so funny how our dads birthdays are on the same day weird ah we do have alot in common dont we. i have just been looking on the net about depression as my councellor said there is a test you can do where you answer a few questions to see if you have it or not so i have done about 5 tests and all came back that i have depression i just for some reason dont want to believe it and feel like i dont want to tell anyone does that make sense. but i will speak to my docs i just hate taking pills like anti depresants as i no people can get addicted to them and i really dont want to be dependant on tablets. Also my dad is really good he has harvey alot for me and he has my sisters 2 girls at the same time they love it he takes them out for pizza then they watch a film go to bed and then he takes them for a big walk around the woods so its nice he usaly does it once a month i dont no alot of grandads that will have 3 grandchildren on his own cos my mum and dad are not together people think my dad is great for having them it sounded weird calling him grandad then dont no why i think its cos he is only 44 so quite young to have 2 daughters ages 27 and me 23 and then 3 grandchildren anyway i am babling about nothing again sorry what am i like anyway i had really bet get back to work i have loads of customers to chase up but i really cant be bothered to do anything speak soon.

Munchy xxx

munchy

yeah we do have alot in common dont we he he he. when i found out i had pnd i told no one, i was ashamed and very embarressed about it all, still to this day alot of my family dont know about it, and i was the exact same way about the tablets, i really was not a believer when it came to depression and tablets, i hated knowing that i needed to be on tablets, it made it feel so much more real and serious but the good thing is THEY WORK and they wouldnt give them to you if you really didnt need them, and i too was worried about being addicted and stuff plus the possible side effects they might have on me, but honestly everything was so much better once i was on the tablets, i never got addicted to them the only side effects i had were some headaches but hey i had them before i started taking them so it made no difference, and they way i tried to look at it was that i wasnt going to be on them forever, only just for now till i give my body a chance to sort it out, bacause depression is an illness which alot people dont know that, my gp told me once " its like having a broken arm just you cant see it) its a hormonal imbalace in your brain, you havent given this to yourself it has just happend, your body has been through sooo much over the last year or so and this is its way of telling you.
no matter what my sweet, i am always here ok i will be by your side every step of the way

take care chicken

hope you have a great day at work

Mummy2chloe

hello hun i feel so crapy today i told dh about the depression thing and he said well your cant be that depressed about your life so that comment just made me angry and i said how do you know but i felt like he wasnt believing me and it makes me think well maybe i am not maybe i should just see how i get on by myself i dont know ever since my concellor has said it i have been in a funny mood i think i always thought i could have it but now someone has actually said it it makes it feel more real i sat on sofa last night having a think about what sort of person i am at the min and i am deffinatly more moody i get irratable short tempered with everything very very sensitive starting to avoid certain things like my christmas party at work feel down about my weight and the way i look i could go on all day and when i looked it up on net it is all signs of it i am gonna go docs today and see if i can bring it up i feel like this week i have been worse but then i am due on which doesnt help i just want to sort myself out for harvey as i shout at him when he is not even do anything that bad and i am getting annoyed at him for things that didnt used to bother me and then i feel guilty for shouting and want to cry cos i feel like a bad mum its such a visous circle. Thanks for been there for me to talk to its noce when someone understands i just feel like i am on my own with this and no one really cares. i just want to be how i used to be a happy bubbly person what like to have fun and enjoy life and i was so layed back.

Munchy xxx

hey munchy

oh my sweetness i really wish i was there to give you a huge warm hug, i think its a great idea that your going to the doc today, hopefully he will be able to help you by either putting you on meds or suggesting something else. But i believe that us women are pretty clued on to when there is something not right with our bodies and just like you i knew there was something not right, i was far from my normal self. i was always cranky and tired and just plain annoyed with everything and anything so i sort of knew something was wrong but was scared to really do anything about it, in the end it took me 6mths to do anything about it but honestly i was so much happier when i got things sorted out and i look back on it now and think why did it take me sooooo long to do something about it, you know what i mean????

i truely think your an amazing woman, you are doing the best thing for you and your family by going to the doctor and getting things sorted out. As for your dh maybe you should sit him down and have a huge heart to heart with him and tell him absolutely everything so he can then understand why you are stuggleing. Please dont ever doubt in your mind that your a bad mother cos you are not, you are a loving and tender mother and i can tell that just by the way you talk about harvey, and honey its ok if you lose your temper, we all do it we are only human, as a parent we all get pushed to some point so please dont worry, but darl what you have gone through in the last year or so has been big and its very much life changing to lose brooklyn would of been devastating and then you started facing the ttc journey which in its self can brake any strong woman down cos its god damn bloody hard, so you have had to deal with ttc plus the loss of your gorgeous little girl brooklyn, my god sweetie you are amazing and dont you ever doubt that.

ok i will stop talking now otherwise i will keep going on, i hope i havent upset you thats the last thing i want to do is make you cry, just really wanted to tell you that you are one of the strongest women i have ever met and i look up to you.

please sweetie let me know how you go with your doctor today i will be thinking of you

take care my friend

Hi honey

thanks for the kind words you choked me up i am trying my hardest to hold back the tears as i am at work you are so right we do no when something is wrong and i just want harvey to have a nice mummy not one who shouts at him all the time cos he doesnt deserve it he is such a good little boy i am so proud of him. its weird you saying i am amazing woman and that cos believe me i dont feel like that not one bit i find it hard when people say good things about me even if dh says you look nice i will say to him you are only saying it to make me feel better poor bloke. i think i will talk to dh after christmas as he has to exams coming up in december and dont want to reuin his christmas so i might see if docs can give me some tablets and just keep it to myself for a while i hate putting my problems on people i am the person where people always come to me not the other way round thanks for understanding i just cant seem to find anyone who understands at the min in my head a feel alone i think i am gonna try and get a laptop asap so i can come on hear when i am at home that way if i want to cry i can. well i will let you know what docs say but i will have to tell you monday as i dont work fridays so will let you know i just hope they can sort me out some way or another i wish i had a magic wond and make everything ok anyway thanks again hope your day is good and that i havent put a downer on things take care honey.

Munchy xxx

Hello

i finally got an appintment at docs they were so busy anyway i saw a lady doc i usally see this man doc who is great but this lady was even better i feel a bit down at the moement so nothing new there i got my results from my blood test to see if i was ovulating and she said it came back saying i am not but they took the blood on day 21 of my cycle and cos my cycle is every 32 days she said they will do another one at day 25 as they could have tested to early i really hope that i am i couldnt stop crying when i got home keep thinking that i wouldnt be able to have any more children which sounds stupid but i was feeling emotional also they are getting my dh to do a sperm test to rule that out and they have put me on anti depressants called citalopram which should help as well so i am glad that there are doing things so rule things out also i am 2 days late which is weird as i have been on time the last 2 months i was gonna do a test but thought what was the point if i didnt ovulate although i could of later on i will probably come on in the next few days my head is everywhere at the min. i hope i am not rambling on after the docs i went to see my best mates nephew he was born at 27 weeks and is in speacial baby care unit he weighed at birth 2lb 1oz he is so lovely yet so tiny i just bought back the memories of brooklyn and how small she was and seeing all the other babies in there there was a little boy born at 24 weeks and was starved of oxygen for 5 min and is now brain damaged it was so heartbreaking been in there i felt so much for the parents very sad. anyway how you going with everything hope you are good.

Munchy xxx

Hi everybody. Haven't been on in a while because I've been real busy with work and stuff. Nothing bad, just ordinary life and too much of it.

munchy: I'm so sorry to hear about your struggles with depression--I'll keep you in my prayers. You've had a lot to deal with lately, so try to be real good to yourself while you're working everything out. Especially with the holidays coming up.

mummy2chloe: AF is coming anyday now (I started spotting), so I'm upping the optivite dose. So far, no reactions. And yes, I have three healthy children that I thank God every day for.

Best wishes to everybody!

hey

munchy how are you feeling sweetie?? i have been thinking about you so much lately, have you started taking your antidepressants yet?? sorry to hear that your not ovulating but at least your finally starting to get some answers, hopefully dh sperm count will be good, please let me know how things go ok. take care mate

tempus moriendi hey how are you, so good to hear from you, was wondering where you got too. has af arrived yet?? its good that your not suffering any side effects, with any luck by you upping the dose might be what you need to get that bfp, i am so excited for you please let us know how you go with it all. what are your kids names and how old?? did you struggle to fall with any of them?? wow 3 kids i bet they keep you busy;) and i know what you mean i thank god everyday for giving my my gorgeous little girl,

please take care ladies

Oh yeah, AF arrived full flow yesterday. Then we can start trying again! I had to go on clomid back in 1995 because my periods got more and more sparse then stopped. The clomid made me ovulate, but I didn't get pregnant until my "drug holiday" after three cycles of clomid (back then they usually only put you on for three cycles, then a couple months off then start you back again. Do they still do that?) But anyway my oldest was born in 1996.

Hi Eveeyone

i am good had a really bad panic attack last night and this morning my face has broke out i have patches of red skin all over my face not sure if it was cos i got my self so worked up last night i was so scared that someone was gonna happen and then i just burst into tears couldnt control it i woke my dh up and he was trying his hardest to understand how i was feeling he is going away tonight for 3 nights to do his final exam and i think thats why i feel so anxious i have my friend staying with me for 3 days which will be really good but i no i still wont feel safe if that makes sence. but on the other hand i am now 1 week late on my period i am getting excited as i keep thinking i am pregnant cos i have no symptoms of anything apart from feeling sick all the time but i have no Af symptoms like cramps headaches bloating getting hot nothing and when i am pregnant i usally get no symptoms and then around 6 to 7 weeks i will start getting pregnancy symptoms i really want to do a test but am scared it will be a BFN i just dont want to be dissapointed and my dh wants me to do it after his exam as he knows it will be a huge distraction god i really hope i am fingers crossed girls. i forgot to say i havent got anti depressants yet as i am waiting for af cos i dont want to take them if i am pregnant so will wait and see. Tm fingers crossed that you get that BFP this month coming.

take care everyone.

Munchy xxx

munchy ooooohhhhh my god i am really excited for you i really hope that your pregnant, what a great chrissy present, you so have to keep me posted cos i wont be able to stop thinking about you now till you tell me hahahahah

oh i really hope you are, best of luck honey i have EVERYTHING crossed for you sweetie.

Thanks mummy2chloe

i am gonna do a test on thursday morning i think which is dh last day of his exam so when he finnishes hopfully i will be telling him some good news and then we can celebrate him passing and me being pregers god i really hope i am i would be so so happy words just cant describe i was sitting at work today and had a strong feeling in my head that said i am pregnant i really think i am but dont like saying it incase im not i bet its just my body plating tricks on me ah well only time will tell i will keep you posted

Munchy xxx