Trying to Conceive after Miscarriage or Los ~ December 08

WTH - I'm sorry AF is being hard on you. But good on you for being positive and looking forward. Goodluck with the IVF cycle. I :pray: it brings your forever baby.

jenushka - I look forward to hearing the good news from your upcoming scan.

Theresa - Glad you're feeling better and I hope that sore throat doesn't get any worse.

Ruthie - I'm sorry about the BFN. Your mother is in my thoughts and I'm :pray: that all will be fine.

pandagirl - I am sorry for your loss. The women here are AMAZING. Goodluck on your TTC journey and enjoy some relaxed time alone with DH.

Hello

This is my first time in this forum - first, you are all so amazing to be able to keep track of everyone and what is going on!!! Second, I am sorry to the depths of my heart that we are here but love the fact that so many people can take so much time out to provide support for so many people.

Third, Ruthie - I hope your mum comes through alright with something of a benign nature :pray: - it is awful what the wait can do to everyone - my DP's mum was diagnosed with breast cancer just after we found out we were pregnant again in August last year - she had a partial mastectomy and is still on chemo until March this year - but she is one of those stoic country lasses who just smiles through it while chewing on the fence post (no disrespect intended - but they breed em tough) - DP and DD are going over in a few weeks to Darwin to look after her. Unfortunately she got really excited about the second grandchild but we lost it in September.

Now - here we are - NYE BD and Ov on the dot - waiting - waiting - well, doing lots of other stuff too - but you know the TWW routine. Am hopeful - there are lots of really good positives about my last cycle but you don't like to get too pent up about it if you can. Day 28 is Mon 19 - so I will focus on all of the epic collections of things that I need to have done by then and hopefully the sweeping in of new energy will encourage a similar outcome.

Much love and laughter to everyone here - I will endeavour to hone the fluffy thinking and get on top of the roll call!!:D

:bluedust: to all TTC and :stickyvibesgirl: to all who are waiting for their babes

Karen van

Karen - :welcome: Sorry you need to be here but you have found a thread with the most wonderful, supportive women. I joined in Oct and wouldn't have survived the last few months without them all. Best of luck with your TTC and :crossfingers: you get a BFP at the end of this cycle!

Pandagirl - Sorry for your loss, it must have been a very hard Christmas for you and your family :( Good idea to try not to obsess (I am trying the same but I am not doing all that well :rolleyes:). Enjoy your time away with your DH, sometimes 'escaping' for a little while can be just what the Dr ordered!

Theresa - Hope you feel better soon, make sure you rest tomorrow. Great bargain on the wedding shoes ;)

Jenuska - How exciting about your scan, look forward to hearing all about it! Glad the doppler is easing your anxiety, I think when I fall pg I may have to invest in one as I know I will just stress otherwise!

WTH - Sorry AF has been hard on you this month :hug: She was a b!tch to me as well! Good luck with your next IVF cycle :bluedust:

Hannah - Hi!

Megsmum - How are you going?

Hi to everyone else, hope everyone had a great weekend :)

AFM - Well AF has finished - thank goodness! Since the m/c AF generally only lasts for 2 days at the most so at least I am not in pain for too long. This was a particulary painful one.

Counting down the days until we see the FS (this Thurs) so I can discuss having the lap. So hoping we can arrange it for Feb, I really want to get it over and done with so we know one way or the other. I have done heaps of reading on endo and I have a number of the symptoms and I read it is also commonly misdiagnosed as IBS which I was disagnosed with about 6 or 7 years ago. Not that I want to have it but at the same time I really want some answers and a reason as to why we can't seem to fall pg after all this time (iykwim).

Going to a wedding in Melbourne in 3 weeks so looking forward to that. It gives us something to focus on as I feel like I am just filling in time until I can have the lap and go from there. Not sure if we will have to stop TTC this cycle, depends when the op will be done I guess.

Good morning girls! I know I've been quiet for a couple days... didn't even bother changing my mood status until just now, and I've not been the most pleasant person to be around lately! If only men could experience AF just ONCE!! *rolling eyes and cursing* I think they'd be much more sympathetic and understanding! lol... ok, off for persies... so much to catch up on!



Indy--Thanks for thinking of me! Feeling.... well, at least tolerant... but it sure beats the "grumpy" alternative! Sorry to hear about your BFN--I know it's been a couple days, but it's still a kick in the gut. *hugs*



babymiracles--Congrats on a successful egg collection! Praying for lots of eggs to :fertilise:



Mel--AF kicking my butt this month, as well! Glad to hear her stay with you was short--hopefully she'll be just as obliging for me... although day 3 and still very crampy and heavy... so I'm thinking noooo, probably not so lucky! Best of :goodluck: with your FS appt on Thursday. At least when you have the answers, you can work on fixing the problem (if need be)! *hugs*



plc--Sorry I missed you on Fri! Your mom's staying with you atm, isn't she? Hope you're getting lots of help and are able to catch up on some missed sleep! How's Damon liking being a big brother? :hug: for you and April!



Zachary's mom (Theresa)--Ooh, nice bargain on the shoes! Can't ever miss out on a bargain--especially when wedding's are so d@mn expensive to begin with! So it's been a couple days since your last post...hopefully I'm not too late in sending you some :noaf: vibes!



Shortcake--So sorry to hear of the loss of your baby girl! While a m/c is hard enough to deal with, it's especially difficult during the holiday season... :comfort: I'm glad that of all the places you could be, you've found us! I'm also happy to say, Yay... another U.S. gal!! Sending lots of anti-AF vibes!



Rach--Sending you some :noaf: and keeping my fingers crossed for POAS Wed!!



issy--Congrats on a great scan! :leap: I saw your little bean in the u/s pic in the gallery!! Keep growing strong and healthy for mama, little one!! :stickyvibesgirl:

Hi and big :hug: for AJC & Samuel!



HannahD--Hey hon... thinking of you and hope you're doing well! Haven't seen an update on you in a couple days! :hug:



WTH--Looks like we're still cycle buds at the moment--yay! I take that very seriously... I still call Megsmum my cycle bud, and she's already UTD!! lol... So the jab-off commences again--remember it's for a great cause! As always, saying lots of positive :pray: as your next IVF cycle begins! big *hugs*



jenushka (the other lovely jen!)--OMG, second trimester already?!?! Where does the time go? Best of :goodluck: with your next scan on the 30th--that's my mom's b-day, so it's sure to be a lucky day!! *hugs*



Ruthie--Oh, hon... I :pray: the Lord cuts you a break this year... you sure could use one! *hugs* As sorry as I am to hear about your BFN's, with your current financial situation, and the stress due to your poor mom...maybe it's a blessing in disguise. I hope you know I mean that out of love and respect... because, of course, a baby at any time is a blessing... but YKWIM, right? I feel like I'm putting my foot in my mouth... sorry if I have! I'm keeping you and your mom at the top of my prayers... I lost my aunt and my dad to cancer, so I know how scared you're feeling! Lot's of love, hon... Oh, do you have Facebook? If so, look me up: jennyor4. Remember, you can upload photos here, too, in the gallery... it's right up there at the top! Would love to see a pic of your mom!



PandaGirl--:welcome: and HUGE :hug: I'm so, so, so sorry to hear of your loss--especially on Christmas day! You're in my thoughts and prayers! Enjoy your time away with your DF!



Karen van--Welcome! And, you're right, the support the girls so freely give around here... it's amazing! Saying lots of prayers that your TWW ends with a BFP!!



Have to shower... will do more persies later! :grouphug: for everyone!

Hello all! I hope everyone is doing well. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that AF doesn't come on the 15th. No signs of her yet!

Ruthie-I am sorry to hear about your BFN. Hopefully next month you get your BFP. Also very sorry to hear of your mom. She is in my thoughts and prayers and I hope everything turns out ok.


PandaGirl-Sorry to hear of your loss. I wish you the best of luck TTC this month!


Mel-Thank you! I am even crossing my toes! Lol. I hope all goes well at the FS!

Karen Van-Welcome and Best of luck TTC this month.

Jen-Hopefully AF is gone and your are feeling alot better. I know I am a miserable person to be around when I have her.


Everyone else sending lots of :pink-babydust::bluedust: !and :stickyvibesboy::stickyvibesgirl:

Shortcake - YAY hope no signs og AF means no is coming for you!!!

Mel - Hope you can have the lab in febuary!!! I had one done many yrs ago now, as my tubes are blocked. You know they told me i only had a 25% chance of having kids. Well ethan came on the pill, and Lilli, well she was special. But it will be great for you guys to get some answers. And Melbourne sounds lovely. A nice break for you guys.

Karen Van - oh how exciting. Hope you get a BFP soon!!!

Ruthie - I hope your mum gets the all clear sweety!!! My mum had the same operation only 6mths ago, she got all cleared, and like your mum this was her 2nd lump removed. It is so scary and honestly im :pray: for your mum!!!

Well ladies im out The wicked witch arrived early this morning, and oh my, im in all sorts. My back is killing me, and my guts feel like they are being ripped apart - grrrr. So AF was 5 days late, im wondering if this means my body is going to have a longer cycle from now on. Only time will tell.
Good news, we picked our little kitten up yesterday, and she is just so cute!! We got a little burmese, and have named her Syrah. Ethan is wrapped in her, and won't leave the poor little thing alone. He carry's her everywhere, and has showed her all his toys. He is such a sweet boy at times.
Ladies, i do have a question. Ok so if i fall this mth, bubs will be an october baby. Though if i don't, and TTC next mth, bubs will actually be due around Lilli's 1yr anniversary. Now going that both my kiddies have been early, if bubs was to come in that novemebr, that would be around ethan's b/day. So what im asking i really don't want to have a baby in november for both of the above reasons. Do you guys think im over thinking??? I honestly can think of nothing worse then a baby to be around the same time i put Lilli to rest.

Oh please have a look, this is my princess Lilli's page Login | Facebook
Feel free to join, and have alook at her photo's, video's etc... I just needed to do a special pg just for her.

6 DPO and going absolutely crazy! :'( I think if we're not pregnant this cycle I'll have to have a break because it's all too much and Ollie's due date is fast approaching... I don't think I can handle another cycle.

WTH...HannahD...*wavin* atcha gurlies!

Jen...Damn AF she was NOT supposed to visit you this month!

jenushka...wow...it's been a while! Glad you and bub are doing well...Lord knows I can't wait until we make 2nd trimester!

Issy...WONDERFUL news on your scan...mine is Wednesday...I am praying sooooo hard that everything is well!

Hi Mel...AJC...Ruthie...plc...KrystieLove...all my gurlies...BIG HUGS!!!

Welcome to the newbies...may you find the support you need here!

:bluedust::pink-babydust:
:stickyvibesgirl::stickyvibesboy:

Karen van - Welcome. You are right, none of us should be here. But at least none of us have to go through this alone.The women here are absolutely amazing. I don't know how the last few months would have been for me without them. :crossfingers: that you get a BFP next week. :bluedust:

Mel - Yay for AF finishing. Only 2 days?! Mine usually lasts for 6. Goodluck with the FS later this week.

jen - Hope AF is starting to ease now. Thanks for thinking of me. I haven't updated on me 'cause I'm getting kind of sick of listening to myself whinge these days but see below.

shortcake - Sending you lots of anti-AF vibes. No signs is a good sign.

rach - Sorry AF arrived and is being hard on you :hug:

maternalbride - Sending loads of zen vibes to help you through the TWW. :pink-babydust: :noaf:

smi - *waving* back at ya! How goes the m/s?

AFM - I wrote a big update but changed my mind about posting it. The short version is that I'm not doing very well. And I don't think it has anything to do with AF arriving last week. I fear that I've gone beyond grief and am sinking into a real depression, but its so hard to know the difference. I'm going to see my doctor to try to find a solution before it gets any worse. DH deserves better than this.

Hannah - my fellow adelaideian. I am so sorry you have been feeling so bad. Definately worth having a chat with your doctor. I had experienced depression in the past, and know it is an awful place to be - worst thing is that when you feel that way you think things are never going to get any better - the good news is that they always do get better - nothing ever stays the same. Anyway just want you to know you are in my thoughts :hug:

Maternalbride ; :pray: that this is your month. Sounds like you are having a difficult time. Hang in there love

Rach - I don't think you are overthinking. You need to just follow your heart sweetie. As I said before I cannot imagine what you are going through but it does sound like it would be very difficult to have a baby born on your beautiful lillis anniversary. :comfort: Hey the kitten sounds gorgeous and glad ethan has something else to love and cuddle as this difficult time for you all

Karen van, Pandagirl and shortcake :welcome: sorry you have had to join this thread. Hopeing for some BFPs for you both very soon

Jen :pray: that this is going to be your month. Sorry AF was so nasty to you.

Mel - good luck with your appointment with FS this week

Ruthie: so sorry to hear about your BFN and also about your mum. I will pray that she is okay. Life seems so unfair at times doesn't it. Take care u

Theresa: Yeh for finding wedding shoes - that is one thing I am yet to get! Wanted to go saturday but was too sick after egg collection on friday. Hopefully this weekend it is!

WTH: How is all that jabbing going? I must admit it is nice to be having a break from that at the moment.

To everyone else :grouphug:

AFM: I am meant to be working but my mind is all over the place - it is making it very difficult. Fortunately pain has reduced dramatically since saturday but still very bloated and uncomfortable. Got a good number of eggs fertilized (not 100% like last time - but nothing to be upset about) - now praying they continue to grow. Having blastocyst transfer on wednesday then it is waiting, waiting, waiting! Do any of you other IVF ladies suffer from a lot of 'gas' during stimulated cycle - it effects me very badly - so as well as waiting, waiting, waiting I'll be burping, burping, burping :redface:

hello lovely ladies...I hope you are all going OK

babymiracles- just popped in to say glad a good number have fertilised! here's hoping this time brings that BFP! And yes, I experienced gas after my IVF stim cycle too

Oh Rach, I just looked on little Lilli's facebook page. What an absolutely beautiful, happy little girl. I shed tears for you and your family as I looked through the photos, I can't imagine the heartbreak and pain you must be going through. You are so brave and strong and I am so happy you have your gorgeous little boy Ethan to help you through this devastating time. I know there is nothing I can say to make it easier but wanted to send you a cyber hug :hug: Wish I could give you one in person!

Hannah - Oh, I'm sorry you are feeling down. I'm glad you are going to talk to the Dr. I too have suffered from depression (years ago) and it wasn't until about 6 months after the m/c that it snuck back up on me. I thought I was going ok but then bam! I am fine now but I needed to find the time and strength to dig myself out of that black hole.
AF used to last for about 5 days before the m/c but now only for about 2 (I'm lucky I know).

In saying that though, AF finished on Saturday but then I had some bleeding Sunday night and then it stopped and then it start again at work today. No pain, just bleeding. This has happened a few times the day after AF has finished but not 2 days after. Very strange. Does this happen to anyone else?

babymiracles - Glad the pain has eased, just keep thinking of those eggies - I hope this is the month!

smi - Nice to hear from you, has the m/s subsided?

Maternalbride - I know what you mean about going crazy, hang in there!

Shortcake - :noaf:

Jen - Glad you are feeling a little better - don't worry my mood should be on tolerant most of the time! I hope AF eases up on you soon. :)

Hi everyone,
I just wanted to pop in and say hi. We're about to join this boat more fully, I think. We had a complete (and totally unexpected) M/C on Christmas Day. Thankfully I've been off work (prearranged) so I've been able to lay low at home, but I go back to work next week so need to get my act into gear. I have my first counselling session tomorrow to try to work out where my head is, and to start to answer the phone again! I think I'm going around in circles a bit! I want to sort my grief out (hmm...perhaps naive??) so that it doesn't bite me too hugely later when we are seriously TCC - maybe next cycle?
What a crummy way to meet such lovely sounding people! Even though this is my first post, I've been following this thread (thank you for your unconscious support!!) and look forward to getting to know you more IYKWIM!
Take care,
M

Just quickly - AF has still not come! I am going to hold out for 2 more days before I POAS. I don't want to get my hopes up too much as I am still getting the odd cramps..... I can only hope!
I will be back later for persies - have to go make dinner as DF is hungry!

hi all, Apologies for the long time since i last spoke. I had 1 month of passing blood clots joined by tests as no body knew what was happening to me. Going from it could be nothing to it could be the reason why I've been having miscarriages. I finally went into hospital for surgery on friday only to find out that it was placenta left over and am now back to square one. Am also having problems with my gynocologist who just wants us to keep trying, we are in the osition where we can't handle the pain again, i really just need some answers. So i think it's time to find another doctor. Does anyone have any suggestions of naturopaths, accupunture, or gynocologist's in sydney I'm really at a loss at the moment:help::help:

Hi all,

Well i'm finally better and back to work! it's only taken a month to shift this blooming illness. I was actually looking forward to coming back to work this morning until i opened my email to find over 1000 to sort through!!!!!!

Just thought i would drop in and say hi!

big :grouphug: to you all!

ooooo one more thing! weirdest thing last night, was sat rubbing cream into my belly then all of a sudden, either a head or a bum was poking out, it was the most weird thing to see, but at the same time soooo cool!!!!!! I am going to give birth to an Alien!!!

DF thought it was the funniest thing.

Anyway, must get back to these emails before they take over.

Mel & babymiracles - Thanks so much for your words of support. Its good to be reassured I'm not the only one to go through this. I've been through some pretty low times before but never sought help for it and depression does run in my dad's side of the family.

babymiracles - I'm glad a number of eggs have fertilised. :goodluck: for the transfer on wednesday. I'm :pray: you get a BFP.

meh - Welcome. I'm sorry for your loss. And on Christmas too. Big :hug: to you. I'm glad you've already found some support here. May your TTC journey be short.

Theresa - Ooh! I have everything crossed for you (well except my legs :lol:). Sending loads and loads of anti-AF vibes. I really hope this is your month.

jackjack - I'm not in Sydney so can't offer you any advice. I just wanted to say that I'm sorry you've been having a hard time. :hug: At least having the placenta removed means you are able to try again.

fifi - Glad you're better and back at work. Goodluck with all those emails. :bellyrubs: for your little alien.

:hello: to everyone else

Hi ladies,

Jen - Glad you are feeling better

Racheal - So sorry for the loss of your little Lilli, Cant imagine how hard it must be. Glad you found this thread the ladies on here are so supportive :hug:

Shortcake,Panda girl,Karen van,Meh - So sorry for your loss, Wishing you lots of luck ttc

Babymiracles - Glad your egg collection was a success, hope the pain eases soon

Fifi - Glad your scan went well and that you are feeling better too

Ruthie - So sorry about bfn, Sending lots of :pray: for your mom

Hannah d - So sorry you are feeling so bad think you are doing the right thing going to see yor doc :hug:

Zachs mom - Hope you get that bfp

Big hello to everyone else

AFM - AF day late although cycles always different, might poas in morning anyway

Rach--I just wanted to let you know that I watched Lilly's videos... I'm speechless... :crying: What a beautiful tribute in honor of a true princess! :comfort: I can't even comprehend what you must be going thru... and poor little Ethan... you can see how much he loves Lilly by the way he looks at her and holds her so gently! Lilly's beautiful face is forever etched into my heart--thanks so much for sharing her with us! Always in my prayers.... too beautiful for this earth...fly free precious little angel! Rach... I'm amazed at your strength...:hug:

Ladies, I have a quick question for you all. I'm hoping someone can let me know what could be going on!

I am now on CD 17. On day 15, I had a very very small amount of light pink spotting. Then later that night, a little bit of brown spotting. It has gone away since then, but I don't know what it could have been. I've never had spotting between periods. I have been trying to look it up online but the only thing I can find relating to pink spotting is implantation bleeding, but I was only on CD 15! I don't think I even O'd yet, and I read that implantation bleeding is usually 6-12 days after conception. Has anyone else experienced this?

Sorry for the lack of persies again. So many new beautiful women have joined since the last time I posted. I am so sorry for the losses of your little angels. :grouphug: They are watching over you always! Keeping everyone here in my prayers.

OMG, OMG, OMG - I got a BFP this morning !!!!!!!! :leap::leap:

I was due last Thursday and tested on Sun to a BFN, my BB's were getting more and more tender, I was peeing so much I was considering the commencement of nappies and talk about starving....

I then said to DH - that's it I'm testing again and sure enough a BIG FAT POSITIVE :leap::leap:

Just had to tell someone cause I feel like shouting it from the rooftops. I am booking into see the Dr as soon as I can and will insist on a scan as soon as possible.

This baby is going ALLLLLLLLLL the way

:leap::leap:

Easha - that is brilliant news. I am so happy for you, wishing you a happy & healthy pregnancy. Well Done! ! !
:happyforyou:

Hannah - I had mid cycle spotting once before. Perhaps was a coincidence but I also had a bad case of thrush the same cycle so I think my cervix was a little sensitive (the spotting appeared after bd). It's not abnormal to experience this (sometimes it's due to hormones) but if it keeps up tell your doctor. Like anything Gyno there could be a million reasons why it happens - but don't panic as I said it's not uncommon.

:

---

DH deserves better than this.

---

Hannah - I only just read this post. Don't be too hard on yourself - ttc is something that you take on as a couple not an individual. Hard to say without knowing your DH but I'm sure he understands and is dealing with it in his own way. Wow, I got so snappy with my DH sometimes but he understood that it was just the anger releasing and was pretty good and rarely snapped back. My DH kept his feelings to himself where I just let them go.

Good idea to chat to your doctor, ask them if there is someone who specialises in grief for women who have had m/c. I went to a psychologist who was totally hopeless and left me feeling worse than I did before I spoke to her so don't want that to happen to you. I got pretty low after my second m/c too - it's un-describable pain and I'm sorry you are experiencing that.

Most of all I just wanted to send you a big hug though.

Easha - I am sooo happy for you!!!

JackJack - Where abouts in sydney are you? Im out west near penrith / blue mountains. I think its important you do find a gyn whos listening to what you want!

To everyone else hi and hugs, sorry for lack of persies but Im off to take my neice to see Highschool Musical in the city!

AFM - Not long now till we start doing the deed! and hoping, hoping, hoping it works!

Hannah...luv...don't be so hard on you...TTC is sometimes very stressful for everyone involved and I'll bet you DH has some thoughts about himself also...you have to unite and be strong for each other. I realize it's easier said than done...but I promise you it's easier communicating than not...do talk to your doctor...you may need some help from medication...it's okay. :hug:

easha...:dance:

Okay gurlies really busy...hugs to you all!

:bluedust::pink-babydust:
:stickyvibesgirl::stickyvibesboy:

Easha - :hooray: thats great news CONGRATULATIONS!!!! wishing you a happy, healthy 9 months.

HannahD- thanks, it is a reassurance that we can try again but scary because i fear that with no answers we will just miscarry again. Depression runs in my family aswell, my sister is actually battling it at the moment, I too have never spoken up through my tough times I can really relate to how you feel, but hang in there.:hug:
erybery- Hi i am from south of sydney, wollongong way. I can see now that he's not helping us my husband hasn't liked him from the beginning i guess he could sense something. Hope high school musical was exciting for you!!:dance:
Hi to everyone else

Easha - :confetti::happyforyou::hooray::bluecheer::stickyv ibesboy::stickyvibesgirl: CONGRATULATIONS. Well done on your BFP.


Rachel - Just wanted to say I'm so sorry for your loss. I've just watch the clip of Lilli and she is one gorgeous little girl. I hope that you don't have to wait too long for your BFP, but you must do what feels right for you with when you would like to have another bub.

I'll have to pop back in later to catch up with the rest of you. The natives are very restless at the moment.

First things First :happyforyou:CONGRATULATIONS EASHA!!!! positive vibes and stickyvibes coming your way!!!

HannahS - as mentioned by AJC I too have had midcycle bleeding but its always been after ovulation. If your worried about it I suggest you visit your doctor that way you get an answer and can rest easy.

AJC - how you feeling? how'severyday life? different I bet now. YOu give us all hope :)

Smi - good to see from your ticker and your posts that all is going well, your bub will be here in no time at all....

Jen - how your feeling lovely? better I hope, we'd all be lost without you and your good advice on this site, thankyou.:bluedust:

babymiracles - glad to hear the egg collection went well, goodluck with your wedding preperation, it wasn't too long ago I was up to my armpits in tulle, shoes, restaurant lists, wedding invites etc....all worth it in the end though, the greatest and happiest day of my life so far.

Hannah - chin up darling, all will be well, good idea to talk to someone, I did about 8 years ago and it was well worth it. Goodluck, I also don't know if you are a christian or have another spiritual belief but I found that praying really helped me too. If it wasn't for my faith I don't know where I would be now.:hug:

Ruthie - how are you? I know its been a tough year for you and a tough couple of weeks too, I've been thinking of you.

someone was after a gyno in Syd? depends on where you are in Syd, I went to see an FS specialist called Dr Gavin Sacks, het IVF Australia in the city and bondi junction,(specialieses in recurrent miscarriages) however they also have a clinic in Westmead, where the head of IVF Australia is the doctor. My sister had 3 perfect pregnancies and her Gyno/OB was Dr Blumenthal, Baulkhalm Hills Hospital. Goodluck!

Racheal - words cannot even express the sorrow I feel for you and the loss of your Lilli and the amazing strenght you must have to cope with this. I'm praying for a BFP for you soon.

Fifi - so wonderful to hear that bub is already pushing mummy around LOL ! so happy all is going well!

Hi to everyone else Mel,JackJack,Tam (wherea are you?), Zac's mom,Chappas, erybery and anyone else I've missed hope there are more BFP's this month! :stickyvibesgirl::bluedust:

AFM - off for new job training in Sydney next week for a whole week, bit sad will be away from DH for that long, but think it will be good to have a bit of a break from eachother sometimes. Looking foward to seeing my mum and sisters again this weekend hoping to get to the beach for a swim. Will also be joining Weight Watchers to help me shed a few kilos, I know the Oraxcin will also help get my weight down but watching what I eat will also help as well as getting back to the gym! I need to prepare my body for April so bub will have a healthy happy body to nestle into when the time comes!

So sorry I don't have time for persies atm... :redface: Just had to tell Easha CONGRATULATIONS on your BFP!!!! :hooray: :stickyvibesgirl: :stickyvibesboy: :leap: SO happy for you, hon!! :hug:


Sorry girls, will try to come back later for persies!

:leap: Easha - congrats from me too honey - so very very happy for you!!! :stickyvibesgirl::stickyvibesboy:

:hug: Big hugs to everybody :hug:

HannahD--So sorry to hear you're feeling so blue. :( I, too, have suffered from depression in the past, and it's difficult--especially if you feel alone and like you can't talk to anyone about it. I hope your dr has a solution for you that you're comfortable with, and it helps you see a light at the end of the tunnel. Do whatever works for you, and don't let anyone make you feel bad for it. You and your DH BOTH deserve happiness... and you'll both work thru this together! Hang in there, hon... and remember we're here for you, too--don't ever feel like you have to spare us from hearing anything you need to get off your chest! :hug:



babymiracles--Best of :goodluck: with your blastocyst transfer tomorrow! Saying lots of prayers for a BFP success!!!



:hello: and big *hugs* to Possums, Mel, chappas, HannahS, & erybery



meh--My sincere apologies for your loss on Christmas day. :comfort: Not that any day is a good day, but Christmas day is just the worst! I think that it's great that you're going in for a counseling session... it's sure to help you sort your thoughts and help you thru the grieving process. While you're right, and it truly IS a crummy way to meet...I've met some of the most considerate, compassionate, caring, and sincere friends here... and if I had to go back in time...I'd still choose to be here now. I hope to get to know you better. *hugs*



Theresa--I'm on pins and needles! :noaf:



jackjack--Sorry for your hard times. :hug:



fifi--Glad you made it back to work! Did you make it thru those e-mails, tho? lol... *hugs* and :bellyrubs:



mollycat & plc--How's my girls? Missing you both! *kiss* for April! Oh, and P... love the new ticker--I meant to tell you that the other day! It's so cute!



smi--I know, I know! WTF??? She's such a witch! At least she's about gone! How's the m/s going?



Mannie--Hope you enjoy your new job training in Sydney! They say "Absence makes the heart grow fonder"... maybe you and DH will enjoy the time apart. Bonus that you get to catch up with family, as well! Be safe! *hgus*

Sorry just a quick one at the moment but had to say.......

CONGRATULATIONS EASHA!!! :hooray: :happyforyou:

I have been starting to give up hope but I see you lost your angel 2 days after me and now it has happened. You have renewed my hope!

Jackjack - Good idea about changing gyn, you don't want someone who istrying to push you into something. It's one thing to be physically ready but emotionally is a whole different story. Make sure you only start TTC again when it is right for you :hug:

HannahD - Forgot to say before I was really lucky and had a wonderful GP who councelled me when my depression started again. I hope you start to feel better soon :hug:

chappas - :crossfingers: :noaf:

meh - Sorry for you loss (especially on Christmas Day). Good idea about going for councelling, I wish I had of straight after it happened. Instead it crept up on me 6 months later. :hug:

easha - CONGRATULATIONS!!! :confetti::leap::hooray: Wishing you a happy and healthy 9 months.

chappas - I hope AF stays away. :noaf:

rach - I looked at Lilli's facebook page. What a wonderful tribute to a happy, beautiful little girl. She will always be part of your family. :hug:

erybery - Goodluck for the upcoming BD marathon. :bluedust:

jackjack - I hope you find a gyno who will listen to you. Its important to have a doctor who will work for you and not against.

mannie - Enjoy your time in Sydney. Its good to get away everynow and again, even if it is work related. At least you'll get to catch up with your family.

mollycat - :hello:

jen - I must admit to being guilty of staying away when I feel down. Thanks for the reassurance.

Mel - Never give up hope! It will happen for you. :hug:

To AJC, smi, jen, Mel, jackjack and all those who have expressed support (sorry for forgetting names, my memory isn't very good lately) I want to say a big THANKYOU. It doesn't seem enough though for all the understanding you've given me.

Whatever this is goes beyond TTC and was here somewhere long before it. Through my teens to my early twenties I would often have periods where I felt low for no real reason. I was at uni so it was easy to hide from everyone except those closest to me and they attributed it to stress anyway. Whenever I decided I would get help, I would make an appointment but then when the time came I would feel better and cancel. I did see a doctor when I was 15 but my mum was with me so I downplayed how I was feeling. The doctor did have come back for a few chats after that but nothing ever really came of it and then she left the next time I thought about seeking help.

As frustrating as this TTC journey is I think it actually helps me. It gives me something to focus on. I make myself eat, sleep and get up off the couch so that I keep myself healthy for the day my forever baby joins me. It gives me a reason to think about and prepare for my future.

DH is honestly wonderful. I don't know what I'd do without him. I haven't been angry or snappy with him, there's just been nothing. I feel so empty inside that I can't take interest in anything. He spent most of the weekend setting up lighting for our new pergola area and was so proud of what he achieved, and there I was feigning excitement when I couldn't really care whether he had done it or not. Thats what I meant when I said he deserves better. He deserves a wife who cares. But its not that I don't care, its just that my brain is so sluggish that I can't express it. Is disinterest not caring? And its everything that I'm disinterested in, not just his projects.

Okay, now I think I'm rambling. I just had to try and express what I'm feeling.

Ugh! I just wish I could get out of my head for a while....

Hi girls

Just a quick update as I am not feeling too well. My throat is killing me and my head is pounding so the computer is not my friend tonight.

Still no AF!!!! Tomorrow is 7 days late. I have been getting cramps again today but absolutely no sign of AF.

I am so scared to get my hopes up but it is hard not to.

Easha - CONGRATULATIONS!!!!! That is fantastic news!!!! :happyforyou:

Hannah - All I can do is send you a huge :hug:

Jen - So am I - but I just can't bring myself to POAS - I did buy a HPT today but I out it in the cupboard!! I am so scared it is going to show a BFN.

Mel- I just dont know when is the right time for me. I am so more than ready for a baby, but just not ready to go through the heartache again, but i don't know that i ever will be...
HannaD- :hug: It's terrible that your going through this, such a positive that you've got a wonderful supportive hubby though, hope that this hard time doesn't last much longer for you:crossfingers:
Hi to everyone else and a big congrats to Easha I am so :happyforyou:

So, I have to be a complete bimbo and ask someone to translate some of these abbreviations for me it just confuses me and i try really hard to work it out but im just not up with the times like that.... so:help:

Thank you for your lovely messages! What a nice surprise - you're all so good at keeping track and taking time to share everyone's journeys. Thank you.:)

I'm not quite up to full personals yet, but I just wanted to say, HannahD you'll know when the time is right to get the help that you need. It's awful that you feel so empty, but you're not alone. Have you got a women's health clinic near you? Sometimes they can be a bit more empathetic as a starting point. It's so hard to concentrate on ourselves, and SO much easier to focus on someone else. I'm so glad that you're able to express yourself here, but I feel so sad for you that you're feeling the way you are. :hug:

AFM - not unsurprisingly the counselling session wasn't the great panacea I'd hoped for! It turns out I'd come across her before in my building at work (I work with families) so it was a strange situation to be seeing her! But, it was kind of good to work out that we're doing OK, and that I shouldn't feel bad about screening phone calls! :)
Amongst many other things, we talked a bit about having monuments for newbie (that's what we called our angel baby). We have renamed our Christmas angel for our tree, and I'm going to plant a new lemon tree and make some cross stitch bits and pieces. I'm just wondering what other people have done? I hope this is the right place to ask - and I hope I'm not upsetting anyone by asking here.
Not quite ready to TTC - bit wussy yet. My body feels quite fine (traitorous thing!) but I'm head is another matter entirely. Hope you don't mind me hanging around whilst I pluck up the courage to start again.


M