Trying to Conceive after Miscarriage or Loss ~ March 2007 #2

Welcome Lisa!
So sorry to hear about your losses. I hope that things turn around for you really soon. I know that FF can be a little daunting to look at first off, but once you get into putting your temps or whatever in there it starts to make sense. Also they send you really good lessons each day which make things a little easier. I have to say I have become a little addicted to it, it is one thing that you can do while everything else is out of control! I really hope that things work out for you soon!

Sarah, your temps look really good and I have my fingers crossed for you.
Thanks Shan for birthday thread, that was lovely.
Hi Las, I hope the natural cycle works out for you and the TTC journey isn't too daunting. We are all here if you need to vent.
Hi Kerry, nice to see you.
Leyla, bummer on the BFN but I am hoping it is too early for you. If you go into the sharing menu in FF and then into home page setup, there is a web address which you can copy and paste into your signature. Make sure you choose the charts you want to share.
BekZ, has AF arrived yet? I hope not and then you can do the sneaky test. Fingers crossed for you.
I tested again this morning and still BFN but my temp went back up which is good. I really want a 2007 baby so am telling myself that it is still too early and will probably test again in a few days. FF tells me to test on Wednesday.

Lisa sorry to hear of your losses. I hope your stay here is short and sweet:)

Leyla - You need to put your FF chart in your signature. I think you go to FF, login, then go to Sharing and copy the link as per the one in my signature. If the information is not enough then I will go through it step by step with you. We are TTW buddies!!!

Hi everyone else.

Tinesel - Your temp looks great hon.

My temp has dropped over the last 2 days and AF pains are really bad, I am thinking that we did not conceive this cycle, but it ain't over till she sings!!!!

Good morning girls,

A quick one this morning. Its my first month temping and i am all over the place. Yesterday I shot up to 37 degrees after being low 36 for a couple of days and today i am back to 36.2. I am on CD18. What is going on with me? Early in the cycle I had up and down too. I test as soon as I wake in the morning which is normally 6am but 7am on weekends. I am weird!

Have a good Sunday to all.

Jen - Are you temping orally or vaginally? I found that vaginally gives a more accurate result. Also some times it seems that your temps are all over the place but when you complete a few cycles you will begin to see what is "normal" for you.

Thanks Bekz and Tinsel, I think I have done it correctly. Let me know if it works...
Jen, I hope your temps sort themselves out soon. Nothing worse than not knowing what is going on. Have you been using OPK's as well?
Anyhow, have had a pretty crappy day so far. My moods are all over the place. Just so scared that this month is not the one for us and its really getting me down. Oh well, I guess I just have to keep my chin up and hope that I just tested too early yesterday. I might try again tomorrow. Although I did note that last time I was preg I did not get a positive until around 20 DPO, does that sound abnormal to anyone?
It did end in misscarriage. Would that have something to do with it?

I am temping orally. I guess being the first time it seems odd. Especially after looking at everyone elses charts and they all seem the same.... not fluctuating like mine.
:(

Leyla - Both my SIL's (not related to each other) did not get +ve until they were 6 wks, and both had to get bts to confirm. So this can be normal

Jen - Hopefully it won't take a few cycles for you to get pg, but after a few cycles of temping you will get to see a pattern. One temp alone doesn't tell you much, it is a collective result that paints the pic. If you still don't think you are getting accurate results with temping orally then try "downstairs."

Good Morning Everyone :D

Heybacko welcome, so glad you made it over. I am thinking of you today :hugs:
Tinsel sorry to hear about your BFN but it could still be too early.
BekZ did you do your 'sneaky test' today?
Leyla what about you, have you tested or did the witch arrive? Everyone can get their BFP's at different times so no you would no be classed as 'abnormal' with a +ve not showing up till 20 dpo.
sarah066 when do you think you will be testing?
*las* I found the whole 'temping' thing extremely confusing when I 1st started, but the course you can do through FF is really helpful.
jenjams are you using a thermometer with 2 decimal places? Also I found my temps to be all over the place too until I started vaginal temping.

Well, DH and I managed to BD 3 nights in a row over the weekend and if my temps continue to go up I should get my coverline on Wednesday, but this morning my temp went up by the exact same amount as the cycle I got pg last time, so I think that UNOFICIALLY I am 1 dpo. I am really hoping that I did O yesterday and hope that it wasn't just my body playing games with me.

Hi Sharon good to hear from you. I hope you guys caught the eggy. I did not test yet....not sure what to do. I have heaps of AF cramps but my temp went up this morn. If my temp remains high tomorrow (it might just take a dive) then I might test.

Hi Girls,
Been catching up on all the news in here - not sure I will remember it all though!!
Big CONGRATS to Janeo - the proposal will get the ball rolling & the BFP will follow I am sure - all the best!
Welcome to the new girls - hope BB helps pass the time until you get your super sticky BFP's! The girls in here are all amazing...
Shan - nice to hear from you - how are things with you?
Good luck to those hanging out to test & those who have tested early - hope there are plenty of flashing BFP's in here next time I check!
CD 9 for me today so the "fun" will be beginning shortly! Not sure how the clomid will affect my cycles so a bit apprehensive this time....BBL for more chit chat. Have a lovely afternoon all!

Bekz good luck with your temps, hope it stays up and you get your bfp tomorrow :crossfingers: for you.
mummyto1 enjoy your BD fun, DH and I went for 3 nights in a row and that was well and truly enough for both of us so hope yesterday was O day coz I don't know if I could convince him to do it all again in a weeks (give or take a few days) time LOL

Hi girls,

Hope you all had a good weekend.

JaneO - congrats on your engagement! That is such wonderful news!

Welcome to Lisa and Alex. Sorry to hear of your losses. Hopefully we can be a good support to you both.

Thanks so much for all of your replies. I had an ok weekend away and am feeling a little better now. I am still absolutely terrified that things will never work out for us, and I am not sure even if we should keep trying at the moment. I just feel like it will only die if we try again, and obviously something must be wrong, they just don't know what it is, so what is the point in trying anyway? Now DH does want to try again, and I am not sure if I want to. I have just got an email from my good friend who is pg, but didn't tell me, and it is going to be so hard seeing her go through her pg when we have had such an awful time trying to have the family we want so much. I am still really struggling with things atm.

BekZ - thanks for all the info re vitex. I think I will go and check it out today. Your chart looks fantastic - I can't believe you haven't tested yet!

SP - have a great holiday. I really do hope it will work out for us, but I am just losing hope now. Thanks for your thoughts. Have you made your OB appointment yet? I hope that all will be ok and the clot is gone, and in the meantime you enjoy your holiday!

Sorry for so few personals, so much has been happening here since I last checked, I just can't keep up with it all!

Bun xx

Hi to every-one

JaneO-congratulations to you, here's to the start of a new beginning
Bun-I am with you, I so cannot keep up with all of this even though I check it out every day.

Welcome to the new girls & Hi to everyone I have missed.
I have a couple of questions for you. AF came on Friday and boy since I had my D&C in Nov 06 AF has been very painful, like it used to be when I was younger. Also AF is heavy for a couple of days then just when I think she has gone she comes back. Does this happen or has it happened to any-one else or is there something wrong. I have only ever had AF for 3-4 days max however she hangs around abit now.
I know I am rattling on but sometimes it all gets on top of us, as you know bun.
on a lighter note I am with you Sharon, we have been doing a fair bit of bding however to no avail this month, my DH has never had enough of that, he thinks it is wonderful, I think it is overated though.
I have done the course on charting, well started it a anyway, I just have to get the therm. Living in a small town this is sometimes hard cause everyone watches to see what is happening in everyone elses life instead of their own. No doubt I will get one & all of the town will know, might have to drive to another town to buy one.
Anyway i have gone on with enough rubbish TTFN

Herbie

Hi everyone!
Well, I am so glad that this week is a short one as I am going nuts and not really able to concentrate at work. Still no BFP or sign of AF, but I have a long cycle so I can expect it anyhwere from now till next monday.
Bekz - You HAVE to test, your chart looks really really promising! I'm keeping everything crossed for you!
Herbie - Good luck getting the therm! I know what you mean about everyone watching you in a small town. My suburb is a bit like that, I always seem to run into someone I know (always the biggest busy body around) who wants to know whats in your trolly. DH and I have become experts at hiding OPK's and HPK's under other shopping 'just in case'!
Sharon - Well done on all the BD'ing. I hope you caught the eggie!
Bun - Ohhhhh! My heart is going out to you! I'm so sorry that things have been so crappy lately. Don't give up! It's going to happen for you soon, I'm sure of it.
Mummyto1 - Good luck with this cycle. Hope the clomid gets things happening for you!
Jen - Hope your temps start behaving soon!

Big hello to everyone else, hope your Mondays were bearable! I got a lovely surprise today. DH knew that I have been a bit down about TTCing and have not felt that positive about this cycle. He bought me a lovely big bunch of flowers! Just because (always the best reason to get flowers!!!).

take care ladies

xx

Hi everyone.

Welcome to las & heybacko.

Herbie - I had a D&C years ago and AF immediately went back to normal so it might be worth checking with your doctor on that front.

Heybacko - it's probably got nothing to do with trying for girls.... more likely to do with your age.... not sure what the odds are but I know we ladies in our 40's are far more likely to mc than our younger sisters..... our eggs aren't so fresh and are more likely to have genetic defects & our hormones are more likely to be out of whack due to us heading towards menopause.

Bun - I know where you are coming from with other people announcing their pg's. I suffered terribly for many years whenever friends and family announced they were pg. I did eventually get over that and learnt how to accept it with a smile.... it just wasn't my time. That said, if anyone announced they were pg to me right now I reckon I'd burst into tears. I'm currently working with two pregnant women, one of whom is always going on about her pregnancy. I can't tell you how hard that is to deal with.


The week & a bit since my mc has been full of ups and downs. I've been trying to be positive in thinking that at least I have a step daughter to lavish my love upon. Many ladies in my position don't have that so I should just be grateful.

I've been bursting into tears at the drop of a hat. Yesterday I cried in the middle of Big W because the only top I liked in the entire store was a maternity one..... and had things not gone wrong I would have been buying it. My DF is trying to be patient with me but he just didn't understand this particular outburst. I did not expect all the tears.... this did not happen with the last MC.

My DF's grandmother told me that her neighbour was 7 weeks pregnant and how happy she was about it the day after I miscarried. I don't know how I managed not to cry. We hadn't told her so she had no idea what she'd just said. I just said "that's nice" and changed the subject. The worst thing is I just know she (the neighbour) is going to be one of these women who have no problems with being pg (just have a feeling about this) and when she gives birth I will be really upset as I will know I should have been giving birth the following week. Hopefully by then I will be pg again and all will be going well so it will not mean a thing to me.

At a party on the weekend someone said "**** tells me you are expecting". Once again had to keep the tears at bay while I explained that I wasn't anymore. I then had to listen to the sympathy that people can't help giving you. I could have killed my MIL for telling this woman that I was pg. It was supposed to be kept quiet.... due to my age and the risk of mc. I know I will not be telling her about any subsequent pg until 12 weeks and DF will be banned from doing so as well.

Grrr, BB wouldn't let me submit and had to refresh and forgot to copy everything I just wrote. Very frustrating.

Herbie, the last 2 periods since my D&C have been really painful and I will go to the Dr if AF arrives this cycle. I have never had pain like that before.
Leyla, how nice of DH to bring you flowers. I have long cycles too and it drives me bonkers by the end.
Hugs to everyone else. What a roller coaster ride we're on.

I am 14dpo so if my temp doesn't drop tomorrow, I will test.

Bun so sorry to hear that you are really struggling atm :hugs: but I know that it will happen for you, but you need to wait until you know you are ready to try again.
Herbie I am fairly sure that with both my D&C's my AF went back to normal so I think that if the next AF is still painful and unusual bleeding then speak to your Dr about it. I don't think dtd is over-rated but when it's 3 nights in a row, it is just a bit too much, although when I first met DH I was a bit of a nymph and jumped his bones EVERY night :redface:
Leyla that is so sweet of your DH to buy you some flowers for no real reason.
satya I was still having ups and downs up till a couple of weeks ago and my D&C was on Feb 13 so it is totally normal, I remember about a week after D&C I thought I better do some washing and as I was sorting it out I came across the maternity top I wore to the Ob/gyn the day I found out I had lost my baby and I just ended up in a mess on the laundry floor, it will gradually get easier but don't try and rush yourself as it doesn't work :hugs:
Tinsel good luck with testing tomorrow (hope temps stay up) and I hate it when BB doesn't let me submit a post too and it is usually a really long one.

Well I am about to head off to bed, have a good sleep everyone, sweet dreams to all.

Satya - I really feel for you and you are not alone here. Hugs, in time the pain will subside and the sun will begin to shine for you again. Sound yourself with those you love and treat yourself. All these things change what happened but they will help you in the long run.

Leyla - Still got my fingers crossed for you. What a great DH.

SP - I am so happy that you and DH are having such a great time. Good on you for having a few wines.

Bun - Welcome back sweety. All I really want to do is give you a big fat hug.

Ok ladies.....I woke at 4.30am!!!! and needed to go to the loo, so I did not know whether to test then or not. So I held on for 1 hour and finally got up and did a test. I was sure that I was going to get a negative because I have extremely bad AF pains atm and no other symptoms. BUT...I got a very strong :bfp:

So I went back to bed and have been tossing and turning ever since. All sorts of stuff started going through my mind. So I decided to meditate and just relax and now I feel fine. I would like to say that I have a really good feeling about this one, but I don't want to get too excitited (due to all the cramping).

BekZ thats great news sending heaps and heaps of sticky vibes your way Heres to a healthy and happy nine months for you
Satya dont be too hard on yourself it takes ages to start feeling ok again sometimes. My last m/c was in June and on Thurs the hosp sent me my US scans from then and I just lost it big time didnt even want to open the packet. Eventually the good days outnumber the bad ones.
Herbie why dont you check out lullaby conceptions they do internet ordering and send your stuff to you pronto in brown paper boxes with no indication of whats inside so noone needs to know what you're up to
Bun I'm so sorry you're feeling lousy please dont give up hang in there and keep chatting in here and I'm sure things will get easier

BekZ that is WONDERFUL news!
I took my temp at the usual time today and it went up (I am 15dpo) so I tested and I got a faint:bfp: EEK. I can definitely see the line at arms length and I don't really believe it. I will test again tomorrow and will hopefully have a darker line. My head is in a spin.

WOW Tinsel congrates to you as well. Sticky vibes. Did you get really nervous when you saw the second line? I did and my heart sank too.

YAY Tinsel on the bfp thats two in one day we are on a roll here Sending sticy vibes your way as well Maybe blow some baby dust my way PLEASE dpo11 now and still bfn maybe still too early

WooooooooHooooooooo Bek and Tinsel. I'm so very happy to hear of those BFP's. Sending all the sticky vibes i can muster to both of you.....How exciting - you'll be BellyBuddies....yay.

BTW - Tinsel (and others too) are you losing your posts or, more-so, are they not going through when you use 'Post Quick Reply', because if you do, and it won't go through, instead of pressing 'refresh' and losing all your post, just click on 'Go Advanced' and it will take you there and you won't lose your posts - trust me, i learnt this the hard way (and after 100's of lost posts...lol). And the Quick Reply button for some reason doesn't accept some characters, like the percentage sign, in it's posts, and that can cause it to stall....going to advance will fix it.

How's everyone else doing!!!!!

Congratulations

Bekz and Tinsel that is great news, sending you both heaps and heaps of :stickyvibesboy: :stickyvibesgirl:
sarah066 sending some :bluedust: for you 11 dpo could still be too early.
*Shan* my problems with posting have always been while using the advanced but have found that sometimes if I copy all the text before refreshing (or cancelling) I can then just paste my text into the new message box and sometimes that works.

Had another temp rise this morning, so I am thinking that I definitely O'd on Sunday (April Fools Day) LOL. I really do hope I get pg this cycle I don't want to wait any longer, although if I am pg this cycle the baby will be due on my brother's birthday, December 23.

Wow Tinsel and BekZ!!! Congrats! Two in one day - that's great!! I hope you both go on to have happy, sticky pregnancies.

Sharon - good luck with this cycle - I hope the trend of BFPs continues!!

SP - hope you're enjoying your holiday.

Satya - it most be so hard working with 2 pg women - I don't know if I would be able to handle that right now. DH and I even find it hard to see our nephew these days. It would be great to be able to hear of someone's pg and be happy for them, with no other feelings, but that can be just too hard to manage while going through this. Hopefully it will be us announcing our pregnancies and healthy babies soon!

Sarah - it's probably still too early, so don't lose hope!

Leyla - your DH sounds like such a sweetie - what a lovely thing to do.

Herbie - definitely look into buying things from Lullaby Conceptions - no one will know what it is and the prices are good.

Hi to everyone else, hope you are all having a good day.

I am still not sure when to try again. There is no reason not to try this cycle, apart from this feeling I can't shake that something is wrong and it will never work out without some kind of help or intervention. I will be having my cycle tracked, so will know exactly when I O, which may make it too tempting to not try. And my specialist said there is only a tiny chance of actually finding something wrong, so we just have to keep trying. I just wish it would work out so badly, and DH and I are starting to get seriously depressed. Why does it have to be this hard?

Congratulations to BekZ & Tinsel on getting a BFP - what wonderful news!

Bekz & Tinsel- A BF congratulations on your BFP that is great news sending lots of :stickyvibesboy: :stickyvibesgirl: to you both.
Hey Tinsel if your great news is anything to go by then there are obviously no problems with the AF pain. I thought maybe because of the D&C being like a "cleanout" maybe this is why it is a little painful.
AF has gone back to normal, after my D&C AF arrived exactly 27days later, usual cycle is 28days, so all has been normal in that respect just a little more painful than usual.If it continues though I will give my OB a call & have a chat.
I think I might order off the Lullaby Conceptions, does it take long to arrive does anyone know?
Sharon-I know what you are saying about BDing, I didn't so much mean overated but sometimes a bit too much. When DH & I met I was like you in that respect. I think DH thought all his christmas' came at once, my how things change a bit after 10yrs LOL.
Bun-lots of :hugs: to you we are all thinking of you, chin up & keep talking in here to us, we are all here for a special reason.

Well Hi to everyone else and I must get back to work, will chat again soon & thanks to you all for information & help with my questions MWAH

Herbie

Hi all!

Just wanted to say a big thank you for the warm welcomes and encouragement! Trying to catch up on who everyone is and where everyone is at!

Leyla - thanks for the advice on FF, I've got the free lessons coming through and trying to make sense of it! I guess it will all 'click' when af arrives and I can actually start tracking properly!

Tinsel - thanks for the lovely welcome! A BIG contratulations on your BFP!! How exciting for you and sending you loads of sticky vibes!

Bekz - thanks too for the welcome! And a HUGE congratulations on your BFP!!! Wishing you a healthy and sticky few months ahead!!

Sharon19270 - I am hoping I managed to work out FF once my next cycle actually starts! Hoping that this is your month, sounds like your body did the right thing by you!

Bun - just wanted to send you a big hug, I really feel your emotions and hope that time will heal it with a beautiful baby soon.

Satya - I'm so sorry you are going through what you are too, so hard when either having to explain it to people or having to be confronted with other people's pregnancies while the loss is still so raw.

Because of having PCOS and irregular cycles, I have no idea when AF will come, I know some people get their cycles back relatively quickly after a m/c, but not sure if the PCOS will play a role in it taking longer. I'm all stocked up with OPK's, DH got some zinc and has started taking it, and I've got FF all set up ready to go. Knowing my luck my FS appointment will come before AF..LOL! I know are chances are better with another FET, but part of me still hopes that we may be able to conceive naturally while my body has recently been pg.

Feeling all emotional again this week, and a lot of my pg friends have not spoken to me in weeks....maybe because they don't know what to say given their situations, but it hurts to be avoided. Such is life :(

Hi to anyone I missed, not being rude, just trying to work everyone out still!

Tinsel and Bekz.... WOOOOHOOOO sending all the sticky vibes your way. Glad to see you will be leaving this thread!

My temps are still low 36.1 On CD18 (i think) If this month i don't get the BFP I will have to start temping down stairs.

Congrats Bekz & Tinsel - woo hoo - enjoy the next 9 months !!
Bun - I really feel for you at the moment - you have been through a lot. I often think "isn't it enought that I have lost a baby, why do I have to wait so long to conceive another...." & thoughts along those lines. We just have to have faith in the big guy upstairs & that he will deliver us our bubba's when the time is right. Maybe you could look into some kind of relaxation/ meditation that you & DH could try together. Also, have you tried the alternative therapies route? Anything to help feel you are getting that bit closer to conceiving a H&H bub. Don't put pressure on yourself though, do what feels right for you & make sure you keep communicating with DH as we often forget how hard this is on them as well....
Hope all you other lovelies are fine & plodding along nicely. Who is going to be the lucky no. 3 announcing their BFP? Good luck to all!!!

Bekz and Tinsel, that is so EXCITING! I really hope those BFPs stick, stick, stick. It's great to hear some good news here - it keeps us going. I think I O'd on Friday but we only managed to bd twice last week - Sharon I don't know how you had the energy to do 3 nights in a row! Good on you girl. Hello to everyone else and welcome to the new girls. I have only been here for a month and I feel so much better having the support of everyone here and being able to talk about all this stuff.

Tonners

Bun I think if you feel like you want to ttc then go for it, and maybe do what mummyto1 suggested and both of you do some relaxation together.
saltprincess I never actually wanted a xmas baby, but if i'm due on xmas day I'm not gonna say no. As for not being able to get in to see your Ob until after you O would totally suck, I know that after my D&C I was sent out my bill and an appointment date for my checkup so I didn't have to ring and make the appt myself, could you ask them to put you onto standby so that if someone cancels you can have their spot?
Herbie I think 3 days in a row of BD is definitely too much, dh and I have been together nearly 20 years and if it wasn't for ttc we where lucky to dtd once a month LOL as for the products from Lullaby Conceptions they usually get posted out the same day your payment goes through, so if you pay by credit card they will be posted that day and it all depends on how long it takes for mail to get to you from Sydney.
*las* no need to apologise for missing anyone in the personals I know I still do (unintentionally) and I have been a BB member since August 06 (?) and you will probably find that the reason your pg friends aren't calling you is because they don't know what to say to you, maybe they are waiting until you call them when you feel you are ready and able to cope with seeing them pg :hugs:
jenjams I find downstairs temping much more consistent.
Tonners the only way we managed 3 nights in a row is because I made dh pace himself, he literally told him not wear himself out on Friday as he still had another 2 nights to go

Have a great day everyone, BBL for another chat.

Thanks everyone for your congrates. I am not going to announce anything "offically" for a while. I will go to doc next week and get some bloods etc. oh yeah and going to the loo and wipping obession has started already!!!!!!

SP - You poor thing regarding your Ob. They should make you a priority, especailly since your Ob told you to come back.

Bun - I agree with mummyto1 maybe relaxation will help you. If you are both tense feeling than this can manifest into physical problems and it can stop what you really want to happen. At first when you do the relaxtion you may not feel relaxed but after doing it a few times you will start to feel better and your mind will start to focus on positive things. Another good thing to do is massage. Hope this helps. I am getting really concerned about you.

I just want to start by saying how fantastic all you girls are. It is truly awful that you have all had to go through such an awful loss or losses and each and every one of you are just so lovely. I don't know how I would have gotten through the last few months if it wasn't for you girls. I really do wish better things for all of you.

BekZ - thanks for being concerned about me. With so few people IRL aware of what I have been going through, it really does help to know that people are thinking of me and understand how I am feeling. I am so so happy about your BFP and really hope, no, I know, that this will be the sticky one you have been after. My psych has given me a relaxation CD to listen to everyday (although I haven't had time in a couple of days), and techniques to help me relax. DH is not impressed with the idea of doing it with me, although I have tried! Do you know anything about macca root? I found some vitex the other day (thanks for writing about it - I would never have found it otherwise), but I didn't end up getting any - thought I would talk to my RE next time I see him. I have been taking Mega B for the last three months which was recommended. Do you know anything about it?

Herbie - you can pay different amounts depending on when you want the package to arrive. I paid the smaller amount and it was supposed to take about 7 days but I had my package in 3 days!

mummyto1 - I have thought about alternative therapies, but am really not sure where to start. How is the clomid going? I wish my specialist would put me on it - hopefully after this cycle it will be apparent whether I need it or not. Do you find that it makes you O earlier or changes your cycle? My cycle is too long and irreg and with the m/cs I keep having, I can't help thinking this is the problem, so I really want it prescribed to me. I just need to convince my specialist of that!

Sp - how frustrating about your OB appointment - I would be so annoyed!!! I don't really have any advice to give you, but I feel your annoyance. Maybe they can squeeze you in if you keep hassling them. Do you think you will start TTC anyway, even if you can't get in? I don't know what to do about testing next time - the pg symptoms I get are so strong that I know I am pg anyway, and I feel that I should find out for certain so I can begin to eat/drink, etc, like a pg person so my bub has the best chance at being healthy. I think we will try again this cycle, but I am not holding out much hope for a sticky bub. I didn't test til 13DPO last time and got AF 4 days later, so maybe next time I will try not to test until I am a few days late? If I can hold out that long.

Of course, I am still feeling down, but getting there. I told my mum about the latest one on the weekend and she didn't have anything to say. I suppose there isn't really anything to say, but I really didn't feel supported or any better having told her. People just don't understand. I am also extremely upset about my friend who is pg. She has been lying to me for three weeks about it, and I mean telling me stuff about fertility appointments and that she doesn't expect to fall for another few months, etc, and all along she has been pg! I am so very hurt by that. She and her DH are the only people we really talk to IRL about our difficulties and I am just so upset that she has been lying to me. We usually see them and look after their kids all the time (they live up the road), and now I can't even bring myself to talk to her. I know I shouldn't blame her - it is their decision when they tell people, and it is v early, but they have known all about our problems, and about our pgs from the v beginning, and I would expect that she would turn to me if something happened with her pg, not just not even tell me about it. I know it's silly, but I am almost as hurt by this as I am about our latest loss, and both having happened in the last week, I am really struggling. And I am not even mentioning how hard it is going to be seeing them all the time as her tummy grows when my babies just die.

Thanks Sharon, Bekz, sara & saltprincess. I'm actually doing really well. Most of the time I'm feeling great, just the emotions kick in every now and then.

Congrats to Beks & Tinsel hope both bubs are of the sticky kind.

Las - must be extremely frustrating with the irregular cycle & PCOS. I've always been extremely regular so I can't imagine how annoying that must be when you are TTC.

Saltprincess - try and be patient about the appointment. Doctors work very slowly with fertility issues anyway it's not likely to make any difference. You are right that they don't seem to care. The trouble is they don't really show any interest in you until you have had either 3 mc or have been trying for over 12 months. They just expect you to relax and keep trying, seemingly having no clue how difficult it is to do that.

Bekz - I feel for you with the wiping obsession. I'm soooooo sure I will have obsession too the next time I get pg.

Bun - try to keep your chin up. Try to not test until you are about a week over then there's less chance of disappointment. Start living like you are pg now and then you will not have to change your behaviour or diet when you are pg and therefore not need to know so early. If you haven't already done so make sure you stop drinking coffee & cola drinks. I read on a naturopath website (one that specialises in fertility issues) that there's something in both that can lead to mc. I'm not sure if I've mentioned this in this thread but also try to cut out transfats as this is now believed to cause infertility in some women. I can tell you what types of things it's in if you want to know more about that. Often dietary things like this can work for women when modern medicine can't help.

As for me, I've had a positive day today, a really hard day at work so I didn't have time to dwell on anything. No tears or sad moments so I'm hoping they are a thing of the past... only time will tell.

Bekz & Tinsel - YAY!!!!!!!!!!!! That is such fab news... I'm so happy for both of you! Both my TWW buddies getting BFP's! Unfortunately I don't think I will be able to make the hat trick, but I have not tested yet. Just a feeling. I'm actually a little scared to test. Might work myself up to it later in the week if my temps stay up. Anyhow, sending loads of positive thoughts and sticky vibes your way!

Bun - Honey, I wish we could all come and give you a big group hug! It is awful when you don't feel like anyone understands what you are going through, especially when its your mum and BF. Just remember that everyone here cares about you and knows at least a little bit of what you are feeling. You can always get your thoughts out here at the very least. I hope things start to turn around for you soon. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Anyhow, sorry I don't have more time to do personals. Hope everyone is well and happy.

love

Congratulations, Bekz and Tinsel, on your BFPs!! :dance: :dance: :dance: Sending you lots of *sticky vibes*

Leyla - I thought AF was on her way too, your chart looks pretty good. Fingers crossed

Well I am thinking positive atm, but every now and then I get a twinge that AF might show up...Stay away,please!!!!

Thanks for the congrats and sticky vibes - I think I will need them all. I still won't believe it until a few weeks and am trying not to worry and give myself extra stress. I have a retched cough from my cold last week and I feel like I am going to cough the baby out! LOL.

Leyla, your chart looks really good and I am getting excited for you to test. Last time I was pg, I got a BFP 11dpo but this time it didn't happen until 15dpo so I have everything crossed for you.
Satya, I am really glad you had a positive day today. One day at a time sweetie.
SP good luck TTC this cycle. I say go for it and I know what it's like not to concentrate on anything else. Try not let those stinkers at the Ob's get you down. I hope they can squeeze you in.
Shan thanks for the advice and I remember that next time.
Sharon I hope you Od on April Fools and have that beautiful xmas bubby.
Bun :hugs: It is sad that your mum wasn't supportive and I know how you feel. Mine had 4 m/c so I thought she would understand out of everyone but she didn't ask me once how I was doing. Luckily I have the best stepdad in the world. I kind of understand where your friend is coming from but only as I got my BFP today. I have a friend who lost her baby at 24 weeks in January and it is going to break her heart when I tell her I am UTD as she is still grieving. I also have another friend who has been TTC for 12 months and she will be sad too. After everything you have been through with your friend, she should have told you. I am glad you post here and you pour your heart out to us. I really hope things start looking up for you. You deserve it.
Herbie, I am hoping I won't have AF pains for the next 9 months. Fingers crossed its a sticky one. I hope your pain eases up. Lullaby Conceptions is fantastic and I get my packages in 2 or 3 days.
Las I hope your cycle returns soon. It sounds like you are well prepared. That's not nice of your pg friends. I hope it works out soon.
Jenjams I hope your temps work out this cycle.
Tonners I hope you caught that eggie.
Phew, I have typed this up while watching All Saints. Catch up tomorrow.