... 3456715 ...

thread: Trying to Conceive after Miscarriage or Loss ~ March 2009

  1. #73
    Registered User

    Mar 2009
    Inglewood, WA

    Good Morning Ladies,

    Unfortunately I didn't sleep quite as well as I had Friday night but still better then any day before!

    MMElissa - Glad your cycle is making you feel more normal, I imagine its a very comfortting feeling!

    Jen805 - Thanls for that. I think Im just praying Im one of those shorter cycles first time round so we can start trying in May.

    Even saying May seems so soul destroying and far far away . Like I might never get there. Guess the good thing is I didn't think I would even make 2 weeks and I did.
    Hubby is taking me away for 9 nights at the end of April, probably sounds silly but it would of been nice to start trying away - would seem like a relaxed time to TTC.

    Oh well, another thing out of my control and making me doubt myself, but Im also guessing that is natural with all the uncertainty surrounding what we are all going through.

    EVERYONE - Any other experiences with D & C's? Would love to know when your 1st cycle started....

    I still don't get how one specialist can tell me start straight away and another says wait a few cycles. ARGH!!!

  2. #74
    Registered User

    Apr 2007

    sallyk - I just wanted to answer 2 of your questions

    I had a D&C after a missed m/c at 12 weeks and AF took 6 weeks to return. Also your q about workout intensity, I don't workout at all LOL I prefer a light walk, but after my embryo transfer that resulted in this pregnancy I asked my FS is there was anything I should avoid doing and he said he wouldn't recommend going out and doing an intensive aerobics class or anything that lifts your body temp excessively. So if it's an intensive class, I would probably drop it down a notch. HTH and good luck

    to all you other lovely ladies, hope you're having a nice weekend!

  3. #75
    Registered User

    Sep 2008

    Hi Sally,

    ifits not too painful what is a body stalk abnormality?

    After my last D&C I didnt get af back but I think thats because of my pcos so my cycles are very irregular. I was thinking last night. Since last April (started TTC) I have only had 2 real cycles. The first was 76 days, the next 60 something then I got my BFP, then had the d&C then waited and waited 2 1/2 months so the doc put me on the mini pill for 7 days to get a fake period so I could start taking a fertility drug to concieve this baby and now dont know whats going on. After I lose this one I probably wont get my period back for ages so I will have to make the decision to just see what happens or go back on the fertility drugs.
    Last time I was told to wait one cycle to ttc so the lining would build up a again as the scrape you quite thin in a d&c to make sure they get everything to stop infection. but ive heard lots of different stories aboutwhen to TTC again!

  4. #76
    Registered User

    Aug 2008

    sally - AF took about 5 weeks to come back after I had a D&C. Also, I have read that really intense workouts are not recommended during pregnancy, so it might be an idea to tone it down. One thing to look into may be acupuncture as it can be used to increase blood flow to the pelvic area which would then help with oxygen. I don't have any experience with acupuncture myself, but there are other ladies around who have used it, so they might be able to give more information.

    Will be back for more persies later....DH is still on his kick to get me out of the house and keep me busy.

  5. #77
    Registered User

    Aug 2008
    Cairns QLD

    Erybery - do not give up hope, I've heard women who have had abnormal scans of their babies fearing the worst, kept the pregnancy and the baby was normal when it arrived. So please we are all praying for you and your bub that all will be well. My OB told me that you can bleed and spot all the way up to 16 weeks of pregnancy due to the placenta not closing around fully until then and thats why some women have light periods throughout their pregnancies and may not even know they are pregnant because of this. We've all heard those stories. When Im down and nothing can help me I take up the bible and read scripture this is a favourite of my DH and mine 'I can do all things through HE who strengthens me' Phillipians 4:13 I hope it can give you some solace, my favourite prayer/poem is Footprints, it has helped me cope with many adversities in my life.

    HannahD - Im the same I don't watch Bones, its not the same, the Vampire side of the whole persona is what attracted me to him and his looks def helped.

    Sally - I've had acupunture and have taken herbs as well, all is quite positive and its exactly as Hannah said, they stimulate your ovaries and blood flow to your pelvic area. I do recommend it and I will probably recommence going to my acupunturist however we are down to one wage at the moment and I just can't afford it right now.

    Karen - goodluck with your scan

    Mel - sending no AF vibes your way, and hope you get a big fat BFP!

    Welcome Melissa, we all know what your feeling and what you are going through right now, just take some time to heal and take care of yourself at this time, its all about you right now. Try and remain positive you will get your forever baby as we all will and have. lots of

    To everyone else lots of stickyvibes your way and to all the lovely ladies who are expecting lots of bellyrubs!!!

  6. #78
    Registered User

    Mar 2009
    Inglewood, WA

    Erybery -
    Easy to type about, not so easy to actaully talk about...

    Body Stalk Abnormalities is when in the intial stage of implantation the split of placent (2/3) and body (1/3) doesn't happen properly.
    The Placenta took to much of the egg and meant the lower body of the baby doesn't have sufficient blood supply (and oxygen) so there is nothing holding the organs in the baby and they form on the outside. SOmetimes it may just be one small opening with one organ or the worse causes is when all the organs other then the brain are on the outside.

    My case was the worst the fetal abnormalities specialist had seen, with the placenta being so stumpy and short some organs seperated from the baby and implanted in my womb's wall. The placenta was also pumping the contaminated blood back into my blood stream.

    The baby would of died before the end of the 2nd trimester and the blood flow and organs becoming toxic inside of me were life threatening for me.
    I think that is the guilt I can't get over.
    My hubby keeps saying how lucky we are - 40 years ago I would of died as well, but seeing the baby and how it formed and how much pain it must of been in never leaves my head.
    I feel like it was me who failed.
    39 documented cases in the last 5 years in Australia (so I have been told) and I had to be one of them...

    Got to love that luck!

  7. #79
    Registered User

    Jan 2009
    Gold Coast

    Thank you so much girls for your support.

    Sallyk61 - My heart breaks for you darling. You've got to know, just like all of us, there is nothing you could have done.

    In response to your question, it took me 5 weeks until I got my first period after my D&C. I was given the all clear to try again at week 2 after my D & C. Apparently I had healed quickly. Still, I have only just got my second period and this cycle was 28 days so hopefully I am back to normal.

    I hope your body heals quickly too babe. I know how awful that first month was... not just the emotional rollercoaster, but what your hormones are doing to you too. Hang in there

  8. #80
    Registered User

    Mar 2009
    Inglewood, WA

    Just been looking into the accupunture, spoke to my hubby and we are both thinking its something we want to do, just for piece of mind.

    No one has had any side effects? No negative outcomes?

  9. #81
    Registered User

    Jan 2009
    Gold Coast

    Sally: I hear its great. Studies show its very effective too.

    Let us know how it goes.

  10. #82
    Registered User

    Oct 2008

    Hi everyone,

    Sorry, busy weekend so haven't had time to post. Look out for the huge post!

    erybery - So glad you have such a wonderful ob (and DH!)to help you through this. I pray your little one fights and grows into a healthy, beautiful baby. Try not to lose hope

    Rhi - Don't be too hard on yourself for feeling that way about your friend. We have all been there. It is natural to be envious of something we all had for such a brief time before it was cruelly taken away. I believe we need to have these feelings to find our way through the grief (the fact we feel guilty afterwards just means we are a good friend ).

    Greenslw - Sorry you have had trouble sleeping. You would think the alcohol may have helped! Good for you for treating yourself to some 'naughty' foods. I think it is good when we can treat ourselves during this TTC journey - sometimes we need it!

    sallyk61 - So sorry to hear what you, your DH and your angel had to go through, it must have been just devastating to hear those results. Can't help with the D&C question but looks like most of the girls have got it covered. As for the exercise, agree with the other girls, I would cut down on the high intensity workouts. Apparently increasing your body temp can be bad for your unborn baby. Maybe talk to someone at the gym about what is safe to do when you are TTC?

    Melissa - Sorry for your loss but welcome to the most wonderful place you could have found yourself to help you through this journey. Thankyou for sharing your story. I hope your stay here is short.

    Chappas - Hope the migraines ease up soon. I agree with Jen, where is your ticker???

    Jen - Ok Jen, so you have caught up on your persies but how are you doing? You always look after us and listen to our problems - we want to do the same for you! Thanks for the no AF vibes too

    mrzbaby - Sorry to hear you are angry at your DH - although I don't blame you. My DH doesn't smoke but my ex did and I remember how he promised he had given up and when I found out he had been lying to me I was so angry and felt cheated! Probably a good thing you had the weekend apart, hoping you get things sorted when he comes back. Not making excuses but I do agree with Jen, men are just wired differently. Plus I think also since we have the baby growing inside us and feel that attachment, men don't tend to feel as attached (although I'm sure they still love them from day one it's just not quite the same as growing that baby inside your body) until they see the baby on the ultrasound or hold them when they are born. Plus we are hormonal

    Hi to Mannie, megsmum, Hannah, plc, smi (how are you doing?), shortcake, WTH, mollycat, MO3B, boble and anyone else I have missed!

    AFM - Thanks so much for all your no AF vibes, so far, so good. Like I said though, last month ws a 35 day cycle so trying not to read into it. Haven't had any real symptoms either way. My bbs started to get a little sore today and I have had back pain on and off. Not like I usually do for a period but it is hard to tell as AF might be different this month now my endo has been removed. Sorry if TMI - but I have been constipated and had a lot of wind which is not like me at all. Hoping that is a pg symptom as awful as it is

    Bit of a chicken and can't seem to work up the courage to POAS. Just not sure I am strong enough to see that one line just yet. I know it is so unlikely I would be lucky enough to fall the first cycle after my op. With my op they didn't have to clean my uterus at all as everything was fine there and I got AF a day after my op so I am thinking my cycles should be back to normal. Anyway, my body has tricked me many times before so will just have to wait (which I am not very good at ).

    Going to Melbourne on Thursday for a couples trip with my best friend and her DH so it should be good fun. I keep telling myself if AF arrives the silver lining will be I can shop till I drop and not worry about it - would rather be pg though!

  11. #83
    Registered User

    Jan 2009

    Sally I just wanted to send you a big i guess we never know if there was anything we could have done differently... but for the most part.... most of these things just happen and there is nothing we could have done to change it iykwim... please don't feel guilty for something you had no control over. and in terms of the pain, your baby may not have been in any pain at all. that was all it ever knew and it is possible, and highly likely that it wasn't in any pain caused by this... and in any case it was NOT your fault. sending you another
    after my d&c it took 5wks for af to come back

    Melissa - welcome. Im sorry you have had to find yourself here.. but this group of wonderful ladies are an absolute godsend! I hope your time here is a short one and we are here for you if you need to rant, rave, cry, scream or just be around people who know what you are going through... and we are also here for you for any happy sort of stuff too

    hi there to everyone else.

    Im feeling a bit.... jealous.... today.. i just found out yet another person I know from a mums group is pregnant... not even trying.. found out at 12wks, already has 3 kids.... and although she is an awesome person and a great mum... im just so sick of, what seems like EVERYONE, falling pregnant around me! for the most part i smile and i am happy for them.. but i mean come on! when will it be our turn? we have been trying since may last year and had 2 m/c's along the way. don't we derserve it too???? sorry, i know so many other people have been through so so much more but i am just feeling very very woeful this afternoon... i actually feel sick with jealousy! how bad is that!

  12. #84
    Registered User

    Jan 2008

    Sally - So heartbreaking what you are going through, please dont feel guilty it was not your fault at all.

    Erybery - Sending lots of

    Mel - you get BFP, when will you poas?

    Boble - Please dont feel sorry for the way you are feeling, i felt exactly the same for a long time whenever i saw anyone pg

    Jen - Thanks, feeling a little better today

    Big hello to Mannie,Megsmum,Melissa and Hannah

  13. #85
    Registered User

    Oct 2008

    boble - Unfortunately we all know that feeling all too well. Sometimes it seems like everyone around us can get pregnant so easily and most of them seem unplanned. It is heartbreaking and so frustrating but we have to believe we will hold our forever babies soon. I think it sometimes helps to wallow in self pity, after all we go through we deserve to be self indulgent and just worry about ourselves for a change

    chappas - Have no idea when to POAS. I am waivering at the moment!!! Think I should just get it over and done with so I know to expect AF. I am just sitting here torturing myself at present

    I start a new job tomorrow (still with the same company but different job on a different campus). Bet AF arrives tomorrow morning just to make my day!

  14. #86
    Registered User

    Mar 2009
    Inglewood, WA

    Good evening all!

    Thanks for the thoughts, Im finding it so hard with not being able to find out much about b.s.a. because its so rare, its that whole UNKNOWN thing again, ARGH it gets me everytime!

    Can't wait to sleep tonight... So looking forward to (fingers crossed) a few hours of un-broken sleep....

    Boble - I think everyone can sympathis with you there. I still think though there is this silent taboo about talking about loss openly. 1 in 3 pregnancy's end in miscarriage then how come we hardly ever hear about other people experiencing things like this?

    We have decided to try out the accupunture asap, just to get the cycles happening, maybe a little quicker and healthier that way.

    I dont want to pin all my hopes on getting pregnant quickly but I can feel myself starting to do that, dont really think its healthy but I guess its anything to keep your hopes up and keep the faith!!

  15. #87
    mummy_of_3_boys Guest

    Hello Beautiful girls

    Sending lotsa your way.

    This weekend has been a cr*ppy one, here's hoping the coming week is better.

    Mel- I know where you are coming from as I am in the same boat at the moment. To pee or not to pee that is the question! (poas that is). I don't want to keep hoping then to have Af just show up but I also don't want to poas and have the hope ended.

    Thinking of you ALL


  16. #88
    Registered User

    Mar 2008

    sally--Sending some AF vibes your way....and some for a short cycle, so you can get back on the TTC bandwagon. Good luck with the acupuncture--I've only ever heard positive comments from the girls in here!

    boble--Sounds like you could use some Don't feel bad--what else would you feel after what you've been thru? We understand.....

    chappas--YAY you! You've put up a ticker! Good for you!!

    MO3B--Sorry to hear you had a [email protected] weekend! *hugs* Saying lots of that our vibes are working!

    Mel--Oooooh, constipation and gas are major pg symptoms! Sending some extra vibes your way!! Hope you enjoy your trip to Melbourne with your friends--sounds like lots of fun and a great distraction! Best of luck with the new job position!

    Me--(Thanks for asking, Mel!) Not too much going on with me, actually. Just pluggin' along.... watching my temps and hoping they behave this month so that I don't have to be a bully and give myself a coverline again! I'm going to call and reschedule my pap since I didn't do it on my b-day, then I can ask about the dye and the blocked tubes, etc. Other than that, just doing my thing at the school.... Thanks again for asking, sometimes I forget to mention what's going on with me!

    Here's a couple songs I heard on the radio the other day that reminded me of all of us and what we may be thinking and feeling at any given time. Hope you enjoy them and are inspired! *hugs*



  17. #89
    Registered User

    Mar 2008

    Another song--same artist, Fireflight (Christian rock)-- that made me think of you girls..... even though there's times we feel so broken, deep down we're strong and Unbreakable!


    Ruthie--This especially made me think of you!

  18. #90
    Registered User

    Jan 2009

    Jen- Hope you can get an appt with the dr soon and get some answers!

    MO3B- Sorry to hear you had a crappy weekend. Hopefully this week goes better for you.

    Sally- I hope the accupunture works for you and you get your BFP soon.

    Mel- Goodluck on the new job and sending lots of vibes your way.

    Chappas- I love you new ticker! Whens your next dr appt?

    boble- I know how you feel. The one guy I work with just announced that him and his girlfriend are expecting. They have only been together 2 months and they didn't even want kids!!!! Its so hard to understand why people like that are pregnant when some of us are killing ourselves trying to get pregnant. Sorry for the rant... just so fustrated!

    erybery- Big ! Praying for you and bub!

    Ruthie- If your lurking I want you to know I miss you and I am praying for you.

    Big to Melissa, Mannie, HannahD, Megsmum, Greenslw, Rhi, AbbeyB, and mrzbaby! Sorry to anyone I missed!

    AFM- I'm calling the doctors tomorrow. I don't know if there is something they can do or not but I am stuck in the same situation again no AF and no BFP. I just wish I knew what to do with my own body. It has been 37days since last AF and that was after they gave me meds to restart my cycle. ! Sorry for the rant ladies!

... 3456715 ...