TTC after Miscarriage or Loss ~ October 07

[kiwigirl]

Zionsmom, are you still around? How are you doing?

[AnnaBelle]

Hello you lovely ladies,

I would like to join you all in your journey to mummyhood!!
Hi there!! My name is AnnaBelle and I have been lurking for quite some
time after my missed mc in august. I had my very first scan and was so excited
to see my baby for the very first time - but not to be - no heart beat - no baby -
- just an offer for a procedure to take my little one away two days later - what a shock.
I almost went to that very first OB appointment on my own but thank god my dh got out of
work at the very last minute to be there and was by my side when I was told my baby was not
viable - dh had to be helped by the OB to sit down as he was about to faint (I love him so much)!!
Anway after that appointment somehow I went back to work that afternoon and got though the day
and somehow my colleagues had no idea i was falling apart on the insidecoping is such a strange thing - and that is i guess what we girls just do)!!
Right now this is how i feel: Weird / Strange / Empty / Anxious/ I could go on and on..
It is so weird now because next time i fall pg (fingers crossed) the innocence of my first pregnancy
will be gone forever - it will be different - that naievity (spelling) will never be there again cause it will be different IFYKWIM - I am sure you all in this group know exactly what i mean!! But that is OK I have come to accept that next time round will be different - for me and dh and we will just take every day as it comes - so if you are all up to it - i would cherish your support in this next part of our journey x
So now I am in the midst of AF nos 2 after my D & C 10/8/07 (9 weeks) and in the frame of mind to get busy and bd the month away.
Thanks for listening
x
Anna

[butterfly_warrior]

Welcome, AnnaBelle. Yes, it is very sad that so many of us know exactly what you are talking about in losing the innocence of pregnancy. My story is so similar to yours - missed miscarriage discovered at 8 weeks and 5 days. The heartbreaking part of it is that two weeks earlier we'd had a scan with my FS and everything was fine... I'm in the process of preparing for another embryo transfer soon, and just like you am choosing to believe it will be very different this time round. However, because of the fact that we're doing IVF, we had all sorts of tests done, and we do know a reason for losing our first bub. I'll be taking lots of medication this time, but it still doesn't take away the fear.

BW