TTC after Miscarriage or Loss ~ September 07 #1

Dawnee - I am so sorry to hear about this but try to remain positive. Many females spot during pregnancy. I really hope this is nothing and this is a really sticky bub. We are all here for you, so please don't feel as though you are alone.

Hi, Dawneee, I am sorry for you and your DH.
I will be thinking of you tonight.

Hi Dawnee...just want you to know Im thinking of you,and sending you the biggest :hug: You're probably feeling pretty scared and alone right now, but remember we're all here if you need to talk, and with any luck the bleeding will stop and youll go on to a have a beautiful little bubby.
Treelo- Howdy. Im really sorry af turned up for you. I was pretty convinced you had IT this cycle. If its any help, before my last preg, my af arrived 1 week early(which never happens) and I went on to fall preg the next cycle. Might mean something??Hopefully it does for you.
Satya- how are you? Hope youre doing OK?
Everyone else, gday, fingers crossed for Bfps for you all.

I'm sitting at 6dpo at the moment, so Ive still got a while to go yet. Hmm. At the moment in my house we're trying to get a work transfer for DP, back home (central Vic) as we've completed our 3 year contract in P.Hedland, which if anyone of you have been here, you'll know its no mean feat living 250km away from another town, and 6hrs flight from family! Anyway. All isnt exactly going to plan at the mo, as I really want to be moved home and settled in our new house (with a shiny dishwasher that Id like to marry!) by Xmas time. All this is getting me down a little, along with the fact that Im worried that I'll never get preg again (let alone carry to term). Perhaps slightly irrational, but Im having one of those days. Anyhow, sorry to make this all about me, but thanks for listening to me rant. Have a great day girls.

Hi everyone,

It's day 4 of AF for me now... normally I only get a few days of spotting then 2 or 3 days of bleeding. It's all very different this time. I've had 3 days of medium bleeding then it went to light last night & today with small clots which is weird. Also been getting a little cramping today. My bbs have been sore all day and have been eating myself stupid. I know I'm not pg as my temp has been down for a week now so it's not even possible. I'm in a really crappy mood too.

Sorry for no personals, but my DF & I are in the middle of another argument.

Dawnee- Hang in there. It is so maddening. I am praying for you and you little one.

Beaksie- I know what you mean about being isolated although we do have a town a little closer but there is nothing significant in communities for 165km and it really takes getting used to. A new DW sounds wonderful.

MelissaL I'm so sorry that we seem to have so much in common. Though my twins turned out not to be molar. My HCG is high now either because I've got very persistent (but normal) retained product or that I've got trophoblastic disease and it is going away on its own. I am assuming that it is the first one and that everything is still normal. Its interesting that you decided to TTC at 3 months of 0 HCG. If the mole did grow back, do you know how long it would take to get dangerous for you? If you did fall PG, and then the mole grew back, would that affect the baby? If you did fall PG, then the mole grew back, and all went well with the bub, you might need treatment after giving birth. This would put you out of the TTC picture for a year after finishing treatment. Would you be ok with that? But I think it must be ok. The literature the mole clinic here gives mentions stories of people who fell PG before the 6mth wait was over, and they had their kid and it was fine. I figure if the clinic tells this story, then its probably an ok risk? Also my specialist said that he tells people to wait 6mths, but with older women he lets them know that if they wanted to, they could start trying earlier. So I think it must be fine. I just noticed that you lost your twins on my 30th birthday. I'm sorry.

I finally had my appointment at the recurrent m/c clinic. Stupid nurse pr1cked me 3 times cos she kept missing my vein and the blood kept stopping. Then she had the nerve to tell me that it was my fault cos I didn't have brekky!!

But it was all worth it. The chromosome tests have proven that DH is a man and I'm a woman. No idea why they needed to do chromosome tests to prove that, they could have looked between my legs like all the other docs have.

I don't know the other results yet, but a scan showed something weird in my uterus wall again, so they've scheduled me for an MRI. I panic when I think about it cos I'm claustrophobic and don't know how I'm going to cope with it.

Soulmate Hiya! IKWYM. I sometimes imagine all three of my angels alive & running about and me with my arms full of my little family. Then *sigh* back to reality. I don't want to wish for twins again, but I would be thrilled if we could have healthy twins.

Treelo Bugger! How frustrating.
Satya So much is happening all at once for you :hug: I hope you and DF sort things out. And any news on the lap?
Jayney I'd rather not know about an early m/c and preferred to think it was a late/heavy period. But, once you know you were pregnant, there is no going back. You can't wipe your memory and male doc shouldn't expect you to. Also, he shouldn't be deciding that its best for you to treat it as though it wasn't a m/c. It was, and he should do his best to treat you or analyse it (my 2 cents). I'm glad you found another doc who treated you better.
Rachael Got my :crossfingers: for you this cycle!
Ems Congratulations on getting married!! Pity that you needed the D&C after all. Maybe there could be a honeymoon bub on the cards?! Either way, wishing you an awesome honeymoon.
Lee Hiya hun. How are you doing? I've been away a bit, but still been thinking of you. Sounds like a good thing that you're taking it easy with TTC (lets see how long that lasts ;) ). I'm going the other way. I bought a thermometer and I'm going to start temping. But apparently the digital thermometer I bought isn't a BBT one, so its not going to work. D'oh!
Aww Dawneee.. I'm so sorry. Its so unfair.
Beaksie I have days like that too. And no amount of rational thinking can convince me that things will be ok and that we will have a family. But things will be ok and I hope you feel more positive by the time you read this.

How are you today Dawnee?
Hi to everyone else.
Well my TTC hasn't really kicked in yet i guess, Today is the 3 week mark post D&C. My ob said that i probably wouldn't ovulate till week 5 or so??
A friend of mine fell pregnant as the same time as me and due the day that i was 2/3/08. I had dinner with her last night and while i am over the moon for her as her and DH have been trying for bub for 7 years they really deserve bub, but the "Its not fair" thought crossed my mind a few times..

I will be making myself scarce from here for a while I think. My DF and I are having major problems and I have serious doubts about the relationship altogether so I'm going to have to forget about TTC for now....probably for ever. Will check back in at some time now doubt. Good luck to you all.

Satya, I am so sorry to hear this news. I hope you and DP can work through whatever is going on. Big hugs to you sweetie.

SG
xo

Hi Ladies all......

Satya - thats all bad news...... but you and your dh have been under so much pressure and suffered your recent loss, I hope you can work it all out. Hugs, and we will miss you, but I reckon you'll be back soon xo

Dawnee - how are you??? :pray: your bleeding stays stopped. Please let us know.

Pash - so good to hear from you..... AND ........ I'm really HAPPY to obsess with you about all matters to do with TTC....... oh when should we start ........ how about NOW !!!!!!!!!! :dance: My bb's are a bit sore right now - I'm wondering if I'm ovulating - 3.5 weeks post D&C - totally feasible I guess. DH and I are certainly doing the baby dance :D actually it's nice to have my libido returned, I'm pretty low on that when pregnant, so dh is seeing the upside of times in between pregnancy...! Hope we can be prego buddies real soon Pash :)

Hello to everyone else. Hope you all have nice weekends.

Lee xoxo

Hello all,
I haven't logged on for a while and there are so many post... it's hard to keep up!
Dawnee - I am so sorry that you started bleeding. How are you going? I am sending you a big hug.
Satya - Sorry to hear that you have so much going on at the moment. Hopefully you and DF can work things out...
Treelo - Sorry to see that AF arrived for you. Mine was irregular as well this cycle. Very weird because I am very regular usually. As it turned out the spotting on Sunday was not the start of AF. I never started bleeding until yesterday which is when it was supposed to happen.
My naturopath reckons is break off bleeding and put me on Premular in addition to my other goodies.
Kbowman - thanks for the Vitex info. Premular is the same product but from Switzerland. I give it a go for a few cycles and see how I go... Hope that you have caught the egg this month. All your EWCM is very promising!!! Hope that you and DF have had lots of chances to catch up this month!
Pash and Lee - i know what you mean about obsessing with TTC. I have found myself obsessing far too much...

Hello and good luck with TTC to everybody else. I have decided to stop obsessing for this month. We are going on holiday in a couple of weeks and I might just leave my thermometer and charts at home and relax (easier said than done!!).

gosh! i havent been able to get on here for a few days (still waiting for MY puter!)
it has just taken me half an hour to read all the posts i have missed out on.
dawnee How are you? i read your post and my heart sank, i really hope that everything is okay, i will be watching for a post.....
littlescottish boy yes, the w(h)ine does help!! i felt much better this week, dp and i have sorted our ***** out, i need to learn that he is not a mind reader!
satya so sorry to read about your probs with df, i felt like that last week. I hope it all works out for the best
beaksie i have no idea where i am in my cycle, still havent dug out that themometer yet, still waiting for af and just :crossfingers: that she doesnt.
hello to all the new people, there are so many now im going to have to work overtime to remember!
my bros gf was admitted to hospital the other day, it turns out that she hasnt yet m/c the embryo as it is stuck in her cervix and has adhered to her cesarean scar, she was losing lots of blood and an us showed lots of blood in her uterus, she wanted to have a d&c but the docs wouldnt do it as the risk to her was too great, they wanted to give her an injection that they give to cancer patients to deteriorate the cells so it can pass naturally, she didnt want to do that so they sent her home!! if she still hasnt m/c by next thursday they will do the d&c.
i know it sounds terrible but i am so glad my m/c was "routine". That poor girl, i am trying to be supportive of her as my brother isnt and i think my mum would rather pretend she wasnt pg in the first place.
anyway has anyone ever heard of that before? i cant believe they didnt give her a d&c to start with, instead of all this stuffing around!!
Hope everyone has a fantastic weekend and wishing us all bfps xxx

Thanks for the support ladies. I feel my trust in him is broken and I just don't know if there is anyway I can get over this one. He's not even willing to stay at home with me tonight to discuss things so I truly believe that it is over for us.

Satya - Im sorry you're going through this :hug:

Satya - Thinking of you tonight hun, i hope you both get past this.

hugs
treelo

satya, I'm so sorry this is happening to you after everything. I truely hope you guys can find a way to work it out together.

Dawnee, you have been on my mind heaps since you left that msg. Are you ok?

Satya- I am so sorry to hear about you and your DF. I hope you are doing OK and I look forward to hearing from you soon. TTC or not. What difficult decisions. We are hoping that things work out for you.

Satya hope you are doing ok. Sorry about whats going on at home with you.
Dawnee, how are you hun? have been thinking of you lots.

Hi to everyone else, not much happening in TCC for me. Just bd'ing lots. The cm i was getting has stopped and it didn't turn EWCM, so hopefully this is still to come. DH thinks its great as the whold bding thing dried up when i was pregnant.

gee, sometimes i dont know why i bother....

Any news, Megan? Still in the 2ww?

Boy im really struggling to keep up with everyone here, so if i miss anyone then im really sorry..

pash - How are you doing sweety? Are your levels close to zero yet?
starrysky - I sure hope everything works out ok for your brothers girlfriend, it sounds horrible what the poor girl has had to go through.
Penny - Forgetting about ttc while your away is not such a bad idea. After my first m/c, we tried for 6 months and nothing happend, so we decided to have a break for christmas and new year and just enjoy the festive season, and low and behold i got pregnant as soon as we stopped trying. So i think you should definatly just go and have fun and not worry about it while your gone.
Megan - Is there any news yet hun? how is Kim doing? sending you both big hugs and i hope you dont have to worry about going through this all anymore. So bring on the BFP!!!!!!!
Jayney - Good luck with this cycle hun, i hope you catch the egg !!
Satya - I hope your everything is ok with you sweety, we are all thinking of you hear at BB.
Leila - I wish my DH was as happy about all the BD'ing?? he says its too much pressure being told when he has to perform !!!
Kiwigirl - good luck to you too this cycle, i think we are close together in our cycles so its nice to have someone to share the tww with. Maybe you can help me hold off on testing !!! im terrible.

Well hugs to everyone else and i hope you all have enjoyed the weekend, I had cooper's bday party yesterday and then went out last night and didnt get home till 3am ! so im a bit weary and am looking forward to a nap this afternoon.

hugs to all
treelo

Sayta , sorry to hear of your loss. Thinking of you and DF.

Good luck to everyone in the testing phase.

I've got soft/wobbly boobs atm (like I had before I m/c). Been very moody too. I hope it is what I think it is but tested and no positive but it may be too early.


Haven't been BDing as much (we were BDing heaps) but I am quite stressed and moody atm, less than 8 weeks till wedding.

Hi everyone,

My DF and I are living apart at the moment. We are trying to work things out but it is very difficult. I saw him today and it was great to feel his arms around me but after a while he got angry again and left before we got fighting.

After waiting all this time for a lap, now I'm wondering if I should bother having it at all. Is there any point putting myself through it if we break up for good? I just don't know.

I hope everyone's well.

Dawneee - I so hope everything's going OK with you right now.

:grouphug:Oh Satya i am so sorry for what you are going through hun. You need the biggest hug in the world!!!:hug: I hope you are in a position to take good care of you at the moment. I believe that all things happen for a reason and i hope that you guys are able to work through this is that is the best thing for you. You are in my thoughts matey.

Everyone else, i will catch up and do personals during the week - we had the most HORRENDOUS weekend ever - we had to take Angus to emergency ward with non-stop spontaneous nose bleeding (very scary), six hours of testing for the poor little darling (he was screaming down the corridors cos they couldn't find his veins for blood tests and they kept jabbing him and digging around), x-rays then found out he has pneumonia!!!!:crying: All related to previous infection which he hasn't shaken (and we just thought he had a cold and cough). So....three days in hospital with a little 18month old toddler who was thinking why am i here, why does everyone keep poking m, what is this painful drip in my arm and why won't Mummy help me. Anyway, i am off work for the week to care for him cos he is a very sick little boy. Please send us positive vibes everyone that the preumonia goes away real soon.

Hugs to you all and i hope you had a better long weekend than me. So emotionally drained - BDing is definitely the last thing on my mind.

Oh, how awful! I hope Angus recovers very quickly for you. You must feel wrecked. Sending hugs and kisses.

Satya, I'm so sorry that you and DP are going through a rough patch. I hope things are sorted soon and that you find yourself back on an even keel again. Had you booked the lap?

Dawnee, I hope you're all right and that everything's ok. Thinking of you.

Wowser, hope that your symptoms lead to a BFP for you. :pray:

Treelo, hope you got that nap! How was the party?

Twomums, sounds like you need some hugs too! :hugs:

Half your luck, Leila!! I'd love some more BD opportunities! Hope you've caught the egg!

Starrysky, what your brother's girlfriend is going through sounds horrendous. I'm so glad that you're there to be kind to her and to help her through it. The poor thing.

Penny, it will be interesting to see what effect the Vitex/Premular has, won't it. Enjoy your holiday, you lucky thing!

Hope you've caught the egg too, Lee. It's greeeaaat when the libido's back, woohoo.

I'm going to be taking a backseat this cycle too, as DP and I didn't manage to get together until the day after O. So I will be your vocal and supportive cheer squad! Hoping to see some spring BFPs in here! :D

littlescottishboy - that must have been quite traumatic. I send best wishes for a very speedy recovery for Angus.

kbowman - I'm still waiting for a public lap.

It's my aunt's funeral and I'm going alone. I am devestated that my DF wont come with me but from day one he used the excuse that he wouldn't be able to get time off work but I don't even think he asked to be completely honest. One of my neighbours offered to go with me and I barely know the man, yet my own DF can't make the effort. He's had a lot of time off work lately and reckons he'll get sacked if he takes another day off, surely not for a funeral??? I didn't realise it was going to be this hard to go to the funeral alone but it's really hit me this morning. I will be going to my parents first so it's not exactly alone, but I really need his support and I'm just not getting it.

Hi Everyone! firstly Thanks so much I have been re-reading the posts and to see how many of you have left me messages and were thinking of me has been over whelming.
Satya: I am so sorry for all you are going through right now and I hope things start getting better for you real soon.....all that is going on in your life the fact you still asked how I was was lovely Thanks!
Same for everyone else too!
Well I can't say I've had the easiest few days and I haven't even been able to post on here either....Well the bleeding got worse then the cramps and clotting I was devastated...I had to go to Brisbane to pick my friend up who was coming for a visit (A friend that doesn't see why we want another Baby anyhow) also I hadn't told her yet that I was Pg...and the clotting had started an hour before she landed so I guess I was in the middle of it.....so I thought as usual I have to act normal and play Hostess all weekend "Groan"....I did tell her on our trip Home and she ranted and raved that 'she bloody knew" blah blah! but oh don't worry NO "sorry how are you etc" we had an influx of visitors all weekend and they all Drank and socialised.....I felt so bloody isolated as usual they all just thought oh Dawn'll be ok and lets not mention it! My hubby even said he's not too sure he wants to try again as obviously something is wrong now.....That got me right in the guts (and we still haven't had alone time to discuss it)as my friend leaves today then I honestly feel like curling up in a ball and having a melt down! I am just Thankful we didn't tell the Kids as they would be devastated! So there you go I was 5 weeks exactly and the one before was 5wks 3 days....not sure how I feel yet but am starting to feel really down today!
Anyhow better go I still have a house guest......:(
Take care everyone! -x-

Hi Dawnee,
I just wanted to say how sorry I am for your loss. Its terrible that youve basically had to deal with this on your own, but you know there's always someone here that cares, and understands how you feel. Sorry, getting a bit too sad to offer anything meaningful, but huge hugs to you an Dh.
Take careXX

Thank you so much for letting us know how your were. I know how hard this must be,and i dont think anything i or anyone else says will make it better so i will just let you know that were are here for you, whenever you need us to lean on.

hugs
treelo

Dawnee So sorry about the loss. Its just not fair, Im sure in time DH will come around, you just take care of you!!
Satya my thoughts are with you at the moment also.
Hope everyone else is fine, sorry lack of personals but i think my dinner is burning (not the best cook)

I'm so sorry about your loss Dawneee. I know how hard it is to deal with loss when you are surrounded by people who don't know what's going on. When my last one started I was in the middle of entertaining my DF's father, mother & her boyfriend. They all knew I was acting weird but didn't know why.

The funeral was lovely. The coffin was painted blue with clouds, butterflies and a rainbow. I saw a magnificent rainbow a couple of hours after the funeral so I know she is at peace now.

She was transported from the church by a Harley hearse with her son riding behind the rider and her godson riding alongside on his Harley. It meant he got to accompany his mum the whole way to the cemetery. It was a fine send off for a very special and individual lady.

Hi Ladies

Wondering if I can join you? I have been in the Waiting for AF thread for the last 3 months, so I am hoping that now that AF has finally reared her late head, I can get on with TTC again.

I hope I get to know you soon, I am sure though that I may already know some of you through the Waiting for AF thread...

Kelly

Of course you can join us Kelly. I hope your stay is a short one.

Your very welcome Kelly, may your stay with us be very short.

treelo

Thanks girls!

I hope that all of our stays are short!

Dawnee, I'm so sorry about the loss of your baby. Please be kind and gentle to yourself, sending you lots of special hugs. :( I wish your friend from Brisbane was more supportive and I hope that when you and your DH finally get that moment alone that he gives you all the hugs you are needing. No wonder you feel like curling into a little ball. I wish I could send you more than just hugs. :hug:

Sounds like a wonderful send off, Satya. Your aunt would have been thrilled.

Welcome to the thread, Kelly. Congratulations on graduating from Waiting for AF.

Hey there, Treelo. Hope things are well with you.

Littlescottishboy, how's Angus today? Hope he is on the mend. Lots of positive healing vibes being sent your way.

Waves to everyone else. Will catch up with you next time around.

Satya- I am sorry I don't live closer as I would come with you for support. I am sorry your DF is being such a bonehead. Sometimes they (men-husbands-etc.) just are. I hope you are able to manage without him today. We are all thinking of you in this time of need. My DH once completely let me down when DD#2 was hospitalized - She was having trouble breathing when she had a virus. He was so focused on work for some reason he said things that made so sense "You can look after DD#1 in the hospital too" But he came to his senses too late to support me but before I smacked him.

Dawnee- I was mad for you- What a horrible few days. Bad enough to lose a pregnancy let alone deal with insensitive people and play hostess. I know how scary it is when DH says casually- "Maybe we shouldn't right now...." My DH has said that several times, but what he means is he doesn't want me to have to go through the loss again. I know if we could 'know' we would have a prefect pregnancy They wouldn't be so quick to say in passing "Maybe we shouldn't" Try to see his words as concern for you.

hello everyone,
Dawnee- i am so sorry for your loss, words can not express the way i am feeling for you right now, you must be a very strong woman to endure what i am sure was a nightmare weekend.
satya- i am glad it sounds like you are a bit more peacefull now, as far as funerals go, your aunts sounds beautiful, its so nice to know we get messages occasionally.
charlie23- welcome, hope your stay is a short one! wishing you a bfp asap.
hello and big hugs to everyone else, my bros gf is definately going in for d&c on thurs, i dont know how she is coping so well, if that was me........ i really dont want to think about it!!
I am looking forward to thursday on a purely selfish note, i am taking my 12 yr old cousin to the royal show!! we havent been for 3 yrs as he has been in malaysia. will go see my bros gf that night afterwards.
I thought i was getting af yesterday, had all the pains, bloating, *****iness etc and a bit of light spotting and now nothing! what is going on????
hope everyone is great and wishing all bfps this month.
xxx

Hi everyone!
Satya: How you doing? I'm sorry for all the loss and heartache you have had lately you've really had more than your fair share dished out,I'm not sure if you posted what happened with DF to make him move out? (sorry if you haven't and disregard as then it'd sound rude that I asked) but if you did was it because of the losses you've had or pressure of TTC i really hope not....but hopefully you will sort it out.
Jayney and Starrsky: Yeah it has been a tough time and believe it or not all the visitors we had DID know what was happening so I can't even say that I was hiding it from them,my Friend that came to stay is a very angry woman at life in general and it gets draining at the best of times let alone when I just can't get my head around what's for Dinner,I honestly think that because I am generally a strong person and have to have a good coping mecahnism for my Job that they think this is the same but what people don't realise is,yes I see quite alot of Death and very sick people dangerously close to it but when it's close to Home whether it's yourself or a Family even a close friend it takes minute for work mode to kick in (and that's only because you HAVE too) this is personal.
Jayney you are right though DH said he is worried about me and that this means something will go wrong and we wouldn't have a healthy Baby....he did seem to take this one a bit harder than the one before,so I told him last night I feel like I need a break so whilst I'm still off work I am going away for a few days (probably next week) I have always fancied "White water Rafting" in Cairns so bugger it! I'm going!
Treelo,Beaksie and everyone else I've missed I hope you are all going okay.
Oh and welcome charlie23 hopefully you wont be here too long! -x-

Dawnee- Have a great trip rafting I went once here and had the best time. Nice to be outdoors, exciting and different from the everyday. Good idea. My DH has been more worried about me each time. There better not be a 4th or he may mean " maybe let's not try anymore" And I do so want 1 more baby!

Starsky- I hope you don't see another drop from AF for a long long time!