Trying to Conceive after Stillbirth/Late Loss/Recurrant Miscarriage October

[MrsRobbo]

That's awesome Lanye. Your little seahorse looks very cute

I know I should probably already know this, but what is the heparin and aspirin supposed to do?

[Hammi]

Fantastic news Helen and Laney. So relieved and excited for you. Helen, if your DH complains about the lack of action in the months to come, tell him that there's a few other DH's on this forum sharing his predicament :-)

I had my pre-conception appt with the new ob on Friday and instantly liked him. He was an open, friendly person and as soon as I told him our history, he was all ears listening to what I had to say, offering advice and comfort where appropriate. I also liked the fact that he admitted that he can't wave a magic wand over me and give me a healthy baby, but he suggested more frequent appointments and weekly visits between 18 and 22 wks as whatever went wrong with Hamish happened in that stage.

He quickly flicked through Hamish's autopsy report and said that "mild hypercoiling of the umbilical cord" isn't a cause of death. He said whenever they use mild, it means they're not really sure. He said he would classify Ham's death as unknown. He's just going check with my old obs what blood tests I had done but he said to go ahead with TTC this month.

AF arrived today which puts my LMP at exactly the same date as Hamish's. This freaks me out but I REALLY want to get pregnant now so I think we'll just go ahead and have a go.

My naturopath has banned me from charting my temps from this cycle onwards and after hearing about Rozzie's, Tildy's, Sue's and Helen's anxiety with temps going up and down after a BFP, I guess she is right. I'm so addicted though!

Ready Jo?

Katie... is it time???

[sryan]

Hi girls,

Katie - are you still around.... has the time arrived??? I am so waiting to hear about your little girl. Thinking of you.

Laney - good news about your high risk appointment and getting to see your little bubs again. Seahorse is a fantastic description of little bubs. I am so excited for you.

Lan - I am so glad your pre conception appointment went well. It is so reasurring to get somebody you feel comfortable with. We will all be here with you also while your TTC journey begins.

Jo - How are you??? thinking of you also....

Paula - how are things with you????

Well with me, I have hit the 14 weeks mark, starting the 2nd trimester.... yeah... anyway I think, I am not totally sure, that I felt bubs yesterday..... I was feeling a kind of bubble movement just below my belly button and about 5 minutes later I sneezed and I felt this bubble movement quite strongly. Though I cant feel it all the time, so I am not completely sure.

Belly rubs to all preggies and positive vibes for all TTC girls and for those who arent in any of the categories, thinking of you all and look forward to hearing how you are.


xxx Sue xxx

[jo76]

hey girls!
Just a quickie so i apologise for no personals. Have had a really rough last few days and i have a full day on tomoorow so wanna be a nanna and get to bed early!
Have been really sick which puts my ttc this month into question as I want to be nice and healthy. on the other hand i don't want to delay so have that over my head too. i worked out if we were to fall preg this month that my due date would be the day after madisons date she was born. that has messed with my mind alot and i feel like i have seriously been quite depressed these last few days...which would'nt have helped my physical health either. (really nasty cough and burning pain in my chest when i do, phlemy and nose running and just blargh!)
We got madison and Jacks urns and i have got their ashes in them now which makes me feel both upset and happy at the same time. i feel better for knowing they are in a more beautiful resting place now but it still hurts so much that they had to be in their urns in the first place. i tols another customer the other about Madison and she said she had noticed that my stomach had been a bit bigger but had'nt wanted to say anything due to knowing what happened with jack. then tonight Josh was saying AGAIN " i know what we can name our next baby..."
Anyway, i am sorry i have'nt been aorund but on tuesday when i have a day off will give you all responses and by then hopefully "katie jnr" has made her entrance into the world!!!!
take care girls! thinking of you all!!!!!!!
x jo

[Tildy]

Jo -- sorry to hear you've been sick. I sympathize, as I have some sort of virus/flu that DH got over quickly since I forced a bunch of echinacea in him but for me it's hanging on (and I'm not allowed to take the echinacea or most other cold medicines now of course). I coughed so much yesterday that I, ahem, had to go change me knickers. A whole new world of bladder control is opening up for me (or closing, depending on how you look at it). Your physical sickness doesn't mean it isn't okay to start TTC of course, but I imagine sex isn't the first thing on your list when you're feeling like this! It's a bittersweet thing about Jack and Madison's urns. Where have you placed them? Your older kids are so sweet, but it must be so hard to hear their little comments sometimes. I think it's a lot of pressure on you to know that even Josh is already waiting for the next bubs! Hang in there, hon; tomorrow is a new day.

Susan -- A warm warm welcome to your second trimester. Any belly yet? I'm so happy for you getting to experience new things now that you haven't felt before.

Hammi -- great to hear that your pre-conception counseling went well! Now you're all set and ready to go! I think your naturopath is probably right about the charting -- I mean, I charted for just one month before getting a BFP, and it gave me lots of info (yay for numbers), but it didn't make it any easier to get pregnant or anything! We just had sex like every other day and it's not like I would have been any less pregnant if I didn't know what my temps were, right?

Paula -- the other ladies can correct me if I'm not quite right, but I believe it's like this. Aspirin and heparin are blood thinners. They make it harder for the blood to clot. A good portion of women who have repeated early miscarriages have either clotting disorders that mess up blood flow to the baby or they an over-abundance of too many or too large "myom" in their uterus (I seriously don't remember if it's called myom in English or cysts or polyps or what; it's myom in Swedish). Almost all of us have myom but in my SIL's case they were filling up here whole uterus and some were very large. They discovered this after she'd had 4 miscarriages in a row, all in week 12. The placenta just couldn't properly get attached. So she was given aspirin because it made the myom "shrink" and stopped their growth, and gave my little niece (whose 3rd birthday we celebrated today) a place to plant herself. And for the ladies with clotting disorders, it keeps the blood thinner so the cord or the placenta doesn't clot up, etc.

Grats again on finding a sympathetic doctor, Laney, one that you're comfortable with. I know it's going to be a long ways before you breathe more easily; you have had a particularly heavy burden of loss to deal with, and I just have everything possible crossed for your little seahorse.

Helen -- there's another lady in the Pregnancy thread, AngelLukesMum (whose name is also Jo) who just got a cervical stitch. Maybe you could send her a little message if you want to ask about it? She's just joined the preg thread, so you can see what she's said about it so far if you look at the last page or two. It could be good to get both the doc's perspective on it and one from another mum. Oh, and about your question about the new American prez -- I'm over the moon. I feel like my countrymen have gotten some of their marbles back, and I'm hoping that will be followed by some of our dignity. 90% of Swedes seem to be super happy about it as well, and I've seen at least 2 Swedish news anchors get teary-eyed about it!

Katie -- just wondering, how do you sit when you get a massage? I want to go in to the massage therapist that visits our office a couple times a week, but I noticed the other day that I really can't lie on my stomach anymore. Lying on my back is a little weird, too.

Rozzie -- replied to you in the Pregnancy thread.

A little cut and paste from the Preg thread about how I'm going: As for me -- I caught DH's cold, first of all. I forced a bunch of echinacea into him so he got better in two days, but I'm not allowed to take it (have been VERY careful reading labels and trying to take as little as possible even of the OK stuff), so I'm still coughing all night and feeling totally ****. We still went up to Karlstad for DH's grandma's 93rd and neice's 3rd birthdays, which was maybe dumb because MIL and FIL are smokers and I always get a bit out of shape physically at their place, but I really wanted to be there and show my semi-belly (I sort of totally don't look pregnant or look like 6 months pregnant, depending on how you look at it) and pick up the baby buggy that SIL wanted to give up. We brought it home with us today, so we officially have our first piece of baby equipment now.

Having that baby buggy, though, has been one little cog in a whole whirring machine of weepiness and emotional complexity these last few days. I haven't slept much for worry about everything baby and non-baby and my bad dreams have been extremely vivid; one that I had last night has really had me on edge for two days and causing a film of Beiron's "birth" to play again and again in my mind. I started crying in the car on the way home from Karlstad (songs on the radio made it worse -- our wedding song, plus a song that became popular after we lost Beiron called "Empty Room" that was about emptiness and loss) and by the time we got home I just erupted into one of these huge cathartic sobbing sessions. So I dunno -- I'm definitely very hopeful and confident about Kebab, but memories of Beiron are especially strong and tough right now.

I'm really looking forward to my scan tomorrow and my midwife appointment on Tuesday. They mean a great deal to me because with Beiron both were already booked when we had the miscarriage, and so now I feel like "Yes, we made it this time!" I'll let you know how it goes.

[Katiegirl]

Hi all.

Jo - sending you the biggest of hugs as it sounds like you are having a rough few days. Feeling sick coupled with missing your little ones must be very difficult. I don't think being sick will affect your TTC chances, but look after yourself anyway. I am glad that the urns have arrived and I know it must be bittersweet for you. It is wonderful that you are giving them a lovely home but at the same time it is something that no mother should have to do in the first place.

Tildy - sorry to hear that you have a bad virus. I know they say you shouldn't take echinacea but my naturopath assured me it was ok and I have taken it during this pregnancy. I have been super careful and have not had a single Panadol or any other drug pass my lips but I have been taking a lot of supplements as advised by my naturopath. I got a really bad cold around the same time as you (20+ weeks) and was soldiering through it, and I questioned her about the safety of echinacea and she reassured me. I know though, that you don't want to take any risks (trust me I have been paranoid) so do what feels right. Good luck for the morph scan and midwife appointment. I love watching your ticker move forward. It is only naturaly that around this time in your pregnancy memories of Beiron will come to the fore - just let them come and deal with them one at at time. Tears do actually help.

Sue - it definitely sounds like you felt bubs move! How exciting. I never felt Nathaniel move either so wasn't sure what to expect this time. It was exactly as you describe - but I often felt like I was being tickled with a feather from the inside. Enjoy each and every one of those early movements - they are magical. My Ob also told me that until you reach 22 weeks, you can not depend on the movements so don't worry if you go days without anything. He told me to expect them to come and go until I reached 22 weeks.

Lan - good luck with TTC this month. Temping can become obsessive! I would pore over my temps and try to decide if they looked good etc. Happy to hear that your pre-counselling went well and that your ob is supportive of you having some extra appointments over the period that you lost Hamish. I have weekly appointments from 12-20 weeks for that exact reason, and they really helped me keep my sanity. I hope your TTC journey is a short and happy one.

Laney - congrats on seeing your little seahorse again - I love that image! I am so glad that you feel comfortable with your dr and that he seems very proactive. Things are moving forward well for you - positive vibes being sent your way.

Helen - can't remember if I sent a congratulations for a great scan - if not then congratulations again! The stitch sounds like a good idea and should give you some peace of mind - try not to worry about infections. All will be well

Hi to MrsRobbo, Cindee and anyone else I haven't mentioned. I hope you are all going well and looking after yourselves.

Well I am still here!!! I woke up and went to the bathroom 4 times last night each time hoping that this time my waters would break or something would happen. I also woke up twice with some cramping and hoped that was the start of something...nope! Will this baby every come? I am getting impatient but I also would prefer that she makes her way into this world at her own time. I am really hoping I can skip being induced.

Tildy - about the massage, I now have them on my side. I have a sloped pillow placed under my stomach and a pillow between my knees (and my head is propped as well). It is really comfortable. I then roll over for the other side. I had one at 20 weeks and they had a special belly pillow that allowed me to lie on my stomach (my osteopath uses this as well). Just make sure that you go to a massage therapist that specialises in pregnancy massage and ask beforehand how you would be lying down. Some places have beds that have a whole in the middle, but the place I use don't have them as they feel they dont' offer enough support - the special belly pillow works well and it comfortable.

[sryan]

Hi girls,

Katie, -

Sue - it definitely sounds like you felt bubs move! How exciting. I never felt Nathaniel move either so wasn't sure what to expect this time. It was exactly as you describe - but I often felt like I was being tickled with a feather from the inside. Enjoy each and every one of those early movements - they are magical. My Ob also told me that until you reach 22 weeks, you can not depend on the movements so don't worry if you go days without anything. He told me to expect them to come and go until I reached 22 weeks.

Thanks for letting me know this, as I probably would have started freaking about not feeling the bubs, havent felt anything since then, so you made me feel heaps better.

Tildy - Glad everything is going well with you, yes I am getting the "bump", lucky I always wore clothes too big for me to work, but they are getting tighter!!!!

Jo - sorry you have been sick. Look after yourself and get yourself better for your TTC journey. When we conceived our current bub, my DH was so sick with pneumonia, but still did the BD. Must admit we were a little worried about it after we found out we had conceived a miracle.....

Hello to everyone else and hoping you are having a fantastic day.

xxx Sue xxx