:hug: All the best for today Dory, I hope it all goes smoothly.
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:hug: All the best for today Dory, I hope it all goes smoothly.
Going to Tassie for a wedding, then to Melbourne for some shopping and football!:
I am now convinced that AF will show her face just in time to come with us!! :wall:
ooohh nice!!!!!:
where in melb are u shopping? DFO near the airport is AWSOME!!!
well at least she will be appearing!!! lol..... but i know what u mean, ud rather her not tag along for the holiday!
All the best Dory and I hope the procedure goes smoothly for you.
CharlieB where in Tassie? I am down south in the northern suburbs outside of Glenorchy. I hope AF is kind to you when she does appear. Will you be TTC after that?
Crumpet, wishing you a Happy Anniversary.
Blessed you are amazing to be sitting exams..!!! good luck with them :)
Has anyone ever had thrush after a D&C or laparoscopy? For some reason every time I go under for either I end up with thrush. I wonder if it the antibacterial wash they use beforehand .. ggrrr.... so now I want to TTC and just get pg again coz I know for me time is running uot very fast, I am trying to beat the age clock.. but how on earth am I supposed to DTD with thrush? I started on nilstat cream today :( I should gear up to O around next Wednesday so I am fingers crossed it will be gone by then.
Well OMG i have no idea how i will catch up. I will have to take it from here.
Tenibear, Welcome with a heavy heart. Glad you found us but so sorry you have needed to. I wish you every dream for the coming months and hope you guys don't need to be here for too long. Everyone in here, as you can see, are so supportive.
All my lovely ladies...my you have all been chatting like crazy i won't be able to catch up until i am back in town.
Dory good luck hun. I have such confidence you will do just fine.
Cumpet- Happy anniversay hun.
CharlieB...I still have my hopes for you. Fingers crossed you are shopping free of af for the next 9 months+.
All, thinking of you.
Byron is lovely. I am busy but all going well. Waiting for the shower right now and then i will go to bed. Taken some lovely photos of the kids and friends. It has been great but missing my man like no ones business. xoxoxo
I was wondering if anyone here had any recommendations for doctors in Brisbane. I've had three miscarriages at different stages of the first trimester. My GP tested me for a variety of things - FVL, Prothrombin mutations, Factor VIII, homocysteine levels, B12 and red cell folate, cardiolipin antibodies, lupus anticoagulant, thrombotic screen, thyroid and JAK2). Nothing came up that could explain the miscarriages. She seemed happy to just let it go and didn't suggest anything else - progesterone next time, monitoring another pregnancy closely or anything like that. While I know that it could have just been bad luck to have three I'd really like a second opinion. I can't go through this again and stay sane.
Thanks in advance.
Jessenia - welcome and sorry for your heartache. Are you after a GP or a a private ob or public ob?
Gigi - enjoy Byron sweets.
Procedure went really well yesterday. Dr was really happy. I recovered well. Not sick from not eating or drinking for over 12 hours - a miracle in itself, and not sick from the anaesthetic either. Recovering well I think. Not too much bleeding or cramping. Very light headed, but apparently its common. Also a bad bout of insomnia last night doesn't help. I thought recovering from anaesthetic made you sleepy? I am tired but not sleepy. Go figure. Was starving yesterday and not so much today. But that's common too. I am a bit dusty today and quite happy to be resting and doing nothing at all. Have a fairly limited attention span, so won't write too much more. Thankyou for thinking of me and sending your words of encouragement my way. I really appreciateit. Take care
oh dory im so glad u have posted i was wondering how u were going!!!!:
so glad all went well :clap: thats fab news!!!!
Hi ladies
Wow - it has been so busy in here I am not sure I will be able to catch up with everyone, but I will try for a few persies....
AngelicDragon - hi and welcome to our thread. I am so sorry for all of your losses, you are such a strong lady to have come this far. And you are an inspiration for me - I am 42 and was struggling with the ticking time bomb of my age, but you have inspired me that there is still hope, although it would be great if my FSH levels were single digits like yours! I wish you a short TTC journey :hug:
Tenibear - hi and welcome to our thread also. I am sorry that I don't have the courage to read your blog at the moment. I still find other people's stories very hard on me and it resurrects a lot of my grief. I am sure you will find lots of support in this thread just as I have. Take care of yourself and I hope your TTC journey is a short one :hug:
Jessenia - hi and I am sorry for your losses also. I can't help you with info about Brisbane Drs but I hope someone can.
Dory - glad to hear your stitch went well and you are doing ok afterwards. And thanks for your kind words of support. It means a lot.
cmeglles - not long until your holiday now. Sorry about being sick - I hope you're over it completely and feeling good. Thanks also for your words of support. Dealing with sensitive topics in a relationship where we otherwise agree on pretty much everything has been difficult but I think I have made some progress - I'll explain below.
Gigi1 - hope you are doing well and enjoying the beach, even without your man. It's not quite the same without them is it? Thanks for your words of support also. You raised a good point about using alcohol to fix problems is completely unscientific - I will keep that one up my sleeve just in case! Thinking of you :hug:
Blessedatlast - hope your exam went well - it sounds intense! I find studying part-time hard enough and I don't have to do exams, all assignments, for my course - you must be dedicated. And thanks for your lovely words of support. I think the 12 month mark has resulted in a change of direction very subtly for me. I think I have reached a point where I need to finish with the lead weight I feel like I have inside my heart and replace it with something lighter, otherwise I won't be able to enjoy my life now and in the future. I have to focus on the good things in my life and be appreciative of a loving DH who would pretty much do anything for me, and my loving family and friends, and of course my furbabies. But I do agree that from some people (my mum in particular) that I should have moved on and Ryan isn't even mentioned. I don't think that is fair or how I want to be but I understand their perspective if that makes sense.
Hi to crumpet, CharlieB, my2boys, samcougar and suzieq.
AFM, just dropped off an old friend at the airport who has been visiting with us since Friday night. We had a lovely day together yesterday and enjoyed catching up. It was good to see her but the downside is I got very little study done this weekend. So Easter weekend I will be writing an assignment :-( but hopefully not for the whole weekend. This week was tough DH away for 3 nights - this week is only 1 night, and to top it off today I have had a headache and AF arrived overnight. This was a short cycle - 15 days - but it was kind of expected due to stress - I think I O'd about CD4/5!! Anyway, had another discussion with DH after doing some research about alcohol consumption and he seems to be coming around to the idea. We had dinner out and he only had 1 small glass of red wine with his meal, which is pretty much unheard of - often it is 3 or 4. I told him that some Drs say no alcohol at all, and some say 2 units/week, so I thought that the recommendation of 7 units/week is pretty generous even though he may not think that at the moment. He agreed with me which was wonderful news. It is hard for him with so many business dinners that he has to attend, and drinks with the boss on Friday night sometimes. It is amazing the social pressure that is put on managers to drink - I think women can often get out of it and just have a softie but for men I think it is harder for them to do that. So the good news is we both seem to be on the same page, or at least headed there, about the alcohol thing. Thankyou to the lovely ladies who offered support and their experience - it means a lot.
Anyway, DH is cooking dinner so I must go. Take care all and have a great week - with so much study to catch up on I will try to check BB before next weekend but I can't guarantee I'll be able to post.
Babydust and stickyvibes to all.
oxo
Cheryl,
Glad it is working out hun. I thought it might be cheeky to keep one up your sleeve. LOL. I think it is harder for men, definately an expectation there but also woman have find other ways to relax...not always but sometimes. Men often don't feel like they can take a bath or get a massage IYKWIM. Hope you do ok without hubby for those nights. I have to say i find it hard but we get through it hey. I hope that you are doing ok this week thinking about Ryan. I have been thinking of you.
Hope you get the assignment done quickly so you can kick you heals up over easter. xoxo
Dory,
So glad it went well ...Yay. A little skip from me.
Beach was wonderful. Kids were great and all went well. Nanny HM is done! Now it is Paparazzi HM! LOL
Jessenia,
Hi hun, sorry you have had such a horrible time. You have come to the right place for advice and support. I have no doubt someone in here will be able to help you. I am not sure I can though. My Ob was a last minute one coming back to OZ. She deals with a lot of high risk etc. She is private but in my case she can take on public patients under referal and request. She was good for me but in no way can i reccommend for pregnancy support as that is not why I went to her. She confirmed the death and managed there after of our baby girl. She is at RBH and if you need more info I am happy to PM you. Hope this helps but I just don;t knwo what she does or can do for woman in your predicament.
Good luck hun. xoxo
AFM,
I took some great photos...well i thought so. Out of the 1000 odd i took, there are a few good ones. Might have to photoshop a couple i think. But hey I am learning and any is better than none for my 'clients'. Ha! I have been attacking my pregnant friend and SILs for photo shoots so I can practise. So they have been grateful and it has been fab for me. They would not have anything otherwise so whatever turns out is a bonus and fun in the process. We got up this morning before leaving Byron to get the sunrise. It was magnificent. I can fully appreciate the need to use manual focus with such a beautiful background as the beach and rocks etc...I have learnt so much in such a short time...got to pick the brains of friends down there and I am well on my way to taking good photos for people. Thanks to my patient subjects. Pregnancy photos are hard, but then again it can also be appreciated that right now, I am not finding it difficult to move around, sit in different positions and I don't have reflux, so that I can appreciate for the moment. My poor friend, she is due any day and we had to have a few goes to find her mojo...not something you can bring to the party if it is not there. When it is not there it is hard to capture that pg glow. I just didn't want her to look back on the photos and think...god i was tired and uncomfortable. Bring out the sparkle in her eye was hard work but this morning, I put her in my clothes so they were new...and she felt a million bucks...I had her crawling from the water up the sand with waves crashing around her. She was a tiger! I can appreciate the patience of a professional photography and kids too...arghhh! A number of icecreams were used for bribes!
Well I am back now and you could say...knackered. Late nights and early mornings and not my usual diet and I am craving bed, brown rice and a bath!
So off i go.
xoxox
yay glad DH is understanding where ur coming from thats great for u!!!:
AFM: well tested yesterday and a BFN...
im very ok with it, i didnt expect a BFP first go again and we wernt meant to be trying till after this AF im waiting for anyway!!
so look out next month!!!!
a big hi to everyone!!!
Hi Everyone :)
Crumpet - Bummer about the BFN.. How was your anniversary?
Dory - So glad the procedure went well.. I was thinking about you.. Keep on baking that bubba!
Chez - I am so glad you understood what I meant.. Sometimes it's hard to explain feelings and emotions through text! I am glad you feel like you have reached that point of letting go of the 'heavyness' (sp?) of grief, but like I said, be aware of it still. I feel like I wanted to let it go so much, I tried but just wasn't ready.. I have to still remind myself that it's ok to still grieve.. Good luck with studying this weekend.. I am OVER IT!! Lol.. I will be so glad when we are on holidays..
Gigi - Hope you rested up after what sounds like a busy weekend.. Glad you had fun..
jessenia - Don't have advice or recommendations, although I had my babies at Royal womens in Bris and the doc's there were wonderful.. Think you are after a GP though? Maybe go see a fertilty specialist, I would want a 2nd opinion too by the sounds of what you have written.. Sad to hear about the loss of your bubs and welcome to BB..
Hi to everyone else, Tenibear, angelicdragon, CharlieB, SusieQ and anyone I have missed..
AFM - Exams went ok.. I think I may have scraped through chronic health, but may have to resit Anatomy and physiology.. Not real confident with that and I know I got some questions wrong and a couple of them were so OBVIOUS!! I knew the answer, just not while I was in there!! Anyway I find out on Wednesday. Thanks for all your well wishes :)
We are in our new house.. We got energetic on Friday so I left TAFE early and packed up the house and we were all moved in by 1am Saturday!!!! We were exhausted, but it's done now.. I just have to put DSS bed together today and that's about it! We had a bit of a house warming on Saturday night and I was a naughty girl. I drank a bottle of low alcohol champagne (3.6 standard drinks) but my friend bought me a normal bottle and I drank half of that too!!! I have been so good though and the last week has been so stressful with exams and moving.. (I know, no excuse!) I am on CD 20 and still no ovulation.. though my temp was low this morning, so maybe.. I found it so hard to pack up Taite and Seth's things :(.. Looking at the clothes they never got to wear.. I am so glad the move is over. I love what I have done with our loungeroom, we are using a different telly cabinet and their urn and stuff looks really nice up there.. I have put a picture on my blog feel free to take a peek :).. Well that's enough rambling from me.. (Notice my new ticker, the other one wasn't working, they are having technical problems)
ETA - Just did an OPK test and it looks like a definite positive.. You know what I'll be doing tonight ;)
Well today I had to problem solve. The email server is not connecting and I was wondering how to get on to BB. Well obvious, just like I did before I joined- go to the web site. So here I am feeling chuffed with myself for something that was really quite obvious.......
Angelic - how's the thrush going? I take inner health plus and find it helps. The worst case of it I have ever had was after some antibiotics and the inner health plus cleared it up quick smart. I tried Diflucan One, once and had a bad reaction to it (similar symptoms to gastro - yuck), so I wouldn't try that again, for me it was toxic, but some people get some success. They do say not to use it though if you are TCC or pregnant. I always seem to get it after labour. At first I thought it was a reaction to the sanitary napkins, cause I only was itchy when using a particular brand. Then I thought herpes? ( but not the simple answer of thrush). Ah the things we girls can talk about?
Gigi - good to hear those photography skills are shaping up. My DH is an avid photopgrapher - he became really good as a sports photographer - all those days on the sideline watching me play - but now I am not playing, it has slid a little for him. Now his focus seems to be taking shots of any bread he makes. But it is such an amazing thing to learn, and the results you will get as you learn more will be fantastic. Glad your friend felt better and I hope she's happy with her shots.
Blessed - good to hear you've moved in! What an achievement. And not to worry if you have to resit some of your exams, I hope you won't have to, because it means extra study for you. BTW - DO NOT FEEL GUILTY FOR ONE MOMENT about an indulgence. I bet it felt so good just to let go and enjoy yourself? You need to remember what that feels like and then to actually do it every so often. I say go you good thing, and I am proud of you.
Cmeggles - how are you doing? you must be busy at the moment?
Chez - I am so glad you and DH are working out such an important issue. It's a hard balance to strike - living your life whilst trying to tcc.
Charlie B - so how was the shopping and footy? Which game did you go to?
Crumpet - thanks
Teni, My2boys, Jessenia - how you doing?
AFM - I remember reading someone said DH was away for work a lot, but tonight he wasn't and it was likely to be the big O! But I just scanned back and couldn't see who it was. Anyway - good luck tonight - have fun with the BD!
Anyway, just reminded me that I found out today DH is going away for work. Probably just overnight. Before I was on bed rest, DH going away hardly ever worried me. But now? I am faced with the prospect of being alone all day, and no respite in the evening and then all night and then all day again. I have realised, with the prospect of DH being away and with having him home especially over the past few days how much I depend on DH for some sanity. Guess I will have to be a brave girl and ask for help. Not usually my strong point. Will have to let you know how I go.
Still recovering from Thurs, but really going very well. It's taken a while for me to get my appetite back and today it is returning. Yipee! I am still more sleepy than usual, but that's not a biggie. I think I might be fighting off something as my lymph nodes on my neck are a bit painful, at times. Oh well, lots of water, rest and vitamin C for me.
Take care
Me again. It's amazing how unexpected grief can be. Of all things, I just got some good news, and it had me numb and probably seemingly ungrateful when I got it over the phone and then when the call ended I broke down crying. Must have been time for a god cry anyway?
Luckily my fur babies are used to the crying and just come a bit closer ( or at least don't run away) , and they don't mind too much when I bury my face into their fur. Sometimes they even purr for me when I do that. And then? Then I feel so grateful that I have them and that they are so accepting and give me so much by such little gestures.
What an emotional rollercoaster this is.
Dory, I hope the cry did some good and don't feel bad for crying. pg hormones can grab you so many ways.
Thanks for asking, the thrush has gone so luckily only a minor dose this time. I have had diflucan before but it seems to take ages to see any benefit from it. This time I just had nilstat and drank yakult when I remember.
Cheryl, the medical seems to point to one glass of red wine of an evening being healthy and beneficial. But no more than one as it will then out do the goodness. Shame then that DH and I don't drink red wine. I went off all alcohol about 2 yrs ago, just can't drink it anymore so I have fruit juice or cordial. I hope you get by ok the nights DH is away. I know I miss having DH there if he goes away.
Crumpet.. sorry to hear about the BFN :(
AFM just briefly coz I have sick kids calling me.. I am down and depressed even with the zoloft and just have this inner gut feeling that we have just said goodbye to our last chance of another baby. Our neighbours have just had their 9th baby!! and I get the feeling we won't even see another 2 lines. A friend the same age as me is happily throwing up after getting her bfp 2 wks after me... I just can't help feeling down and bitter and just. urgh!! :(
Sorry for the downer but I can't post how I feel anywhere else :(
Jude
Hi everyone!
Hope you all had a good weekend :)
Well my big news is that AF has finally showed her face, just in time to fly east with me on Wednesday! Quite mixed feelings strangely enough - I am really happy to be back on track cycle wise, but it's also been another reminder that I should still be pregnant.
So we will definately be TTC this month, back to square one! :wall:
Other than that we are busy getting packed up and getting our business ready to leave for 10 days. Typical last minute panic!
It's my birthday over the easter weekend and I am really dreading it - I am quite freaked out about turning another year older, why can't time stand still until we can have a healthy bub!!!
Crumpet - sorry for the BFN :shakehead: Has AF arrived yet? I guess there is still hope if she hasn't shown up yet. :crossfingers: for next month otherwise, we can be TTC buds!
Dory - I'm so glad that the procedure went well. I really agree with you when it comes to the fur babies, I was just telling DH that I don't know how I would have gotten through the last couple of months without them. They seem to have sixth sense when it comes to giving me that extra bit of support!
angelicdragon - :hug::hug: I'm sorry your having a bad time. I really hope there is another BFP in the future for you.
blessed - well done on the move, and the exams, sounds like you well and truly earnt the bubbly!! your blog had me in tears, you have created a beautiful space for angels in your new home :hug:
Hi Gigi - glad you're enjoying the new camera! I hope your settling back into home and catching up on some sleep!
Chez - all the best with the study - I hope you manage to have some realxing time over easter as well though. And I was happy to read that you and DH have found some middle ground with the alcohol.
Anyway I should get back to work, big hello to anyone I missed.
take care
xxx
Angelic - hugs, BIG HUGS. I am sorry you are doing it tough. Come here for a big snuggle.
Charli B - such a positive post.
Can I ask a question? I have been feeling a little hurt by a friend the past few days, and I am not sure why. I think maybe I feel like I am being ignored and then offered platitudes. My friend is on her own really difficult journey and maybe its selfish of me to want her to be here for me now, when she is doing it tough now too. Maybe I am just reading too much into things? It scares me a little that I am feeling like this. Try as I might, I can't seem to brush these feelings aside with my usual "logic". When I write it down it seems really petty and I feel embarrassed now. True friendship is not a calculation, but rather giving when necessary. Maybe I should just toughen up. Any tips or suggestions is the question, anyway, for how to deal with these feelings. Anyway, thanks in advance.
Hi everyone
Gigi1 - you sound very refreshed and upbeat since your trip to the beach. What a wonderful distraction a hobby such as photography can be, even if you are taking photos of pg tummies! Still, I can hear your old confidence returning and that is good news. I hope you enjoy playing with photoshop. I am a raw beginner using it but have managed to get some success.
Crumpet - sorry for your BFN this month hun. I love your enthusiasm for next month - good luck!
Blessedatlast - whew! you sound like you have been very busy. I hope your exam results are good and you don't have to resit any, but at least you have that opportunity if you do - always nice to have a backup! And moving house as well. You sound like you are happy in your new house with how things are turning out. I am pleased for you and hope that this is the sign of new beginnings and good things just around the corner. :hug:
Dory - I hope you are getting stronger each day and have rested up. You are such a strong lady and deserve only good things with this pg. Re your friend - I had a similar situation last year and I found that it was easier to give her the space she needed to deal with her problems as I wasn't in a state to really be helping her. We haven't really reconnected to what we were before losing Ryan, but to be honest I don't really feel like I am missing anything in my life because of it. We still keep in touch but aren't as close as we were. I am not sure if that will be the outcome for you and your friend, but it is a possibility with any friendship as time goes on I guess. Ok I am rambling now... but I guess what I am trying to say is I hope you manage to work out something that fits with you and what you need at the moment but try not to be too disappointed if they are unable to do it.
Angelicdragon - I am sorry that you are feeling so down at the moment. I understand completely where you are coming from but that doesn't make it any easier I know. I wish there was some way that I could grant you your wish of another baby, and then I would send it to everyone here as well. I can only say that some days are harder than others and some days I find that I have to remember to reflect on the good in my life and be content with that otherwise I fear I will wake up and realise that I spent so much time focusing on TTC that I forgot to enjoy my life. It's hard, especially after loss and seeing others around us go on blissfully happy and unaware of the sadness inside us. I hope your days and weeks become easier :hug:
CharlieB - sorry that AF has arrived - talk about cr@ppy timing! I hope enjoy your holiday - Tasmania and Melbourne - two of my favourite Aus places. And happy birthday for this weekend. I hope you get to do something special!
AFM - another busy and stressful week. DH is only doing day trips this week but still he's home quite late so not quite the same as having him here for dinner etc. I am hoping to get some of my study done on Thursday at work as my boss has given me permission to do that. I also have a GP appointment on Thursday - that pap smear that I had to cancel and maybe some b/ts and referrals and stuff for another IVF cycle in a couple of months. It will be interesting to see what she has to say about that. DH is going to try to come to the appointment with me if he can get away from work. Other than that, I am trying very hard to take things easy as I can feel my stress levels building again and I know how bad that is for TTC. Oh and DH and I seem to be on the same page at last with the alcohol intake. He has dramatically cut back his drinking this week - I only hope he can continue with it!
Time for a shower before dinner - a frozen WW meal! Yum!
Take care all
oxo
Chez - thankyou, such words of wisdom, and compassion. I agree space is the key. I think it was probably me being antsy, and being reactive to her style. I am not sure what the future holds, but at least I am not so angry or hurt. My mum told me the other day she thought I was brave. I wondered if it was just stubborn, but she didn't agree, although she said I can be stubborn. I don't see that what I have done is anything special, but its nice to receive the praise, does my ego good. All women who struggle with infertility and loss find an inner strength and I think are amazing, and you're one of those women.
Good luck with your appointment - got to look forward to those pap smears. Good news that Dh has been a good boy this week. Even if he's not this angelic every week, if he can do it more often than not, that is a good thing.
My DH is away tonight, hence I am in here, staving off potential lonliness. It's good for me to be alone and to know that I can manage it.
I watched Julie and Julia today and really enjoyed it. Anyone else seen it? What did you think?
hey girls....
sorry no personals today feel a bit blah really......
i will say dory so glad everything is going ok after ur stitch......:dance:
still no AF but im expecting it today or tomorrow if my calculations are right, who knows suppose it will come when it wants to come.....
finding it a bit harder to deal with things all over again lately.... i still post in the may mummies thread and as happy as i am for all of them its making me a bit sad the closer my due date gets......
hi to everyone hope ur all well
crumpet, I'm the same in regards to the late-April belly buddies thread - two more babies have been born from mine, so everyone's getting all excited where I'm getting upset that I won't be holding a baby in a few weeks. Before that, they were wondering who would be first... I went away from the computer for a little cry before coming back and reminding them whoever's baby was next would be the second ;) I think I'll have a nice big breakdown on Ianto's due date (23rd April)
Crumpet & Teni - big break downs on EDDs are fine and I actually encourage them! It's a hard day to work towards, with so many feelings to process. Sometimes the anticipation of the day can be harder than the day itself turns out to be. And sometimes not. Just be gentle with yourselves and take care. My best recommendation - don't put too many expectations on yourself for the day, and just let it happen rather than having a "plan". I am usually a plan sort of girl, but I have had no plans, just some general ideas and what you end up doing will be perfect on the day for you. This my friends, is really hard stuff.
You are both a lot braver than me, I have never had the courage to join a belly buddies group and I don't expect to either.
its hard isnt it...... im very lucky the girls are great but i dont want Gus to be forgotten in the group thats for sure....like u he was the first born, just coz he didnt survive doesnt mean it doesnt count!! im sure the girls will be great about it though, its just my mind doing its usual "wondering" ;):
ianto was due the day before my birthday!
thanks dory.....:
im defiantly not planing anything, i feel sorry for Dh coz its his birthday the day after Gus was due, happy birthday to him...:shakehead:.... i dare say its going to be hell but ill deal with it as best i can i suppose
Oh girls (Crumpet and Teni) , it is so hard to face these pregnancies around you/us. And BB is one place i guess you have more power than ever to avoid whatever you care to. Go easy on yourselves. Don't do what you are not comfortable doing just for the sake of others. People that matter will understand. Thinking of you as you reach these dates. It is a stuffed up situation and there is nothing more I can say right now. I was going to say it gets easier to deal with/ manage. But today i feel like screaming so that is from another space entirely. Thinking of you.
Cheryl, hun be careful hun and rest up. I need to take my own advice. I have been so full on with other things and people I have just forgotten my own wedding anniversary. The balance is out in my life right now. Have to work at getting it back. I am feeling good hun, better than before health wise. I am happy and busy, pulled and twisted. Sometimes the balance is almost perfect and then the next minute i feel it building, moving towards out of control again. I guess what i mean is it is never far from the wobbles, like a top spinning. Can be such a fine balance and now more than ever i have learnt that i need to take care of myself, I can't just let myself go for too long. Thinking of you hun and rest up when you can. xoox
Dory, I have to say hun that I have let relationships go a bit. I have not been able to handle them as well as i would have liked to. I still have my wonderful friends but need more time for me these days. Like Cheryl, i don't feel like I have missed out necessarily...most of the time. I do miss what was that will never be again.
I am not sure I can help as i have needed the opposite really and that is to be left alone more and friends have wanted to be there. I have told my friends where I am at, as best i can, who I am atm and hope they understand and give me time. I have found that most people get it. Some people don't and to be honest i don't mind to leave them behind for the moment. I have not had the energy or balls to fight or justify. More than ever I have become someone that backs down. I hope that changes as i don't want to be a victim but i just can't be bothered right now. I would rather leave them behind. God this sounds horrible. Our needs have become so much more important. However every now and then I have found i explode emotionally. God i sound nuts don;t i...really I am not. I love my firends and find the juggle hard these days.
Boy that was a ramble. I think to give her space is a good thing. It sounds like it is taking your energy/thought and time...and that you need for yourself right now. Oh i wish we were good at practicing what we preach. I seem to get into trouble when i need things, support, reassurance and acceptance from someone else. I am trying my hardest to find it within myself...trying!
Oh hun, that was not helpful at all for you.
Angelicdragon, My hopes are still there for you hun. Thinking of you and hope you are feeling a bit better.
CharlieB, Sweety, sorry Af arrived but glad it gives you some regularity. Thinking of you and wishing the very best.
AFM,
Well, DH and I forgot out wedding anniversary yesterday...just remembered now. Oh dear, never mind. We don't get upset about these things. Everyday is a day to celebrate our love together.
Tired now.
SOrry for those i have missed. Got to go and get dinner going.
Love and thanks to all.
HM xoxo
Gigi - thankyou. Every day is a day to celecrate your love - I like that a lot, it resonnates with me, becuase I agree. I don't think you are a victim at all, just your priorities have changed. Don't be so hard on yourself and rest up! I am getting much better at that - its just practise. It is hard to put yourself first isn't it? Hope you are not so tired today.
Mwua!
This time next week, a good friend will be in hospital after her c section. She is fearful and trying to accept this but finding it hard. I am trying to get myself ready to go to see her. I thought i might give my visit purpose and take her some food as i know she will also be suffering with hospital food and she loves her food. So I am trying to think of what I can take. If I get there and don't want to go in, at least i can leave food.
Anyway, that is today. This thread is so busy now, it is too much for me to leave it a couple of days...i struggle catching up.
Love to all hm oxxo
Just a quick selfish post to say it is official: I am intelligent.. Yes Ladies, I passed my Anatomy and physiology exam and chronic health.. Woo Hoo!!
Blessed - AWESOME. Congrats, but you know, its just confirmation of what we already knew?
Ditto Dory! Well done Blessed, you are a star!
Hi ladies
Blessedatlasst - yay :dance: Well done! You must be thrilled! Make sure you treat yourself for all of your hard work!
Dory and Gigi - thanks for your kind words. I agree, we do have to learn to treat ourselves better and put ourselves first sometimes. I find recognising when I need to do that is the hardest. I will endeavour to do that more often.
Crumpet and TeniBear - I find the build up to my EDD was very hard so I understand what you are going through right now. We decided to mark Ryan's EDD with a quiet picnic beside a lake in the late afternoon. We watched the sun going down and cast a flower into the water and said some quiet words and then sat there and watched the flower float away in the fading sunlight. We took some photos to remember the spot (we were in France) and to remember the day. We have shown my ILs who were respectful of the time, but no-one else. I guess it should be as public or private an event as you want - whatever feels right. I know some other ladies who released balloons with messages written on them, and written their baby's name in the sand at the beach. I hope you both find some way to recognise the day and be at peace with it.
Hi to Samcougar, aries, my2boys, charlieb, angelicdragon and everyone else.
AFM - had my GP appointment today. Pap smear was done but as I'm CD5 there was a tiny bit of blood which might render it invalid. If that happens I have to wait 3 to 6 months before another one! Oh well. Came out of the Dr's office with a handful of paperwork - more b/t day 1 and 21 usual tests, plus referrals for two specialists - one for IVF and one for a colonoscopy - yay! I get one done every 5 years because of a family history of bowel cancer so my GP has recommended getting it done before starting IVF again. I'm lucky that my GP is lovely - she was very encouraging about trying IVF again, so that was good. DH even made it to the appointment which was nice. DH hasn't had a drink since last Saturday night - he is such a wonderful caring man. I really hope that what Dory says is right and that even if he can't do this all of the time that it may make a difference!
Anyway, time to order pizza for dinner - our treat to ourselves for such a busy week!
Take care all and have a happy Easter! I hope the Easter bunny brings a fertilised egg to all of us ;)
oxo
Enjoy you pizza hun and aren't our men just gorgeous. Glad all is being sorted for you. That is a bucket load of tests and I hope they all go well. You are a trooper!
xoxoox
Hello my beautiful friends,
I'm sorry I've been MIA, but have been so tired lately with the new wee man in my life. But every time I whinge to anyone about it who is willing to listen, I remind myself how lucky I really am!
So, I've dropped in to say hello and to say that I often think about you ladies and I pray that soon you'll be seeing those two lovely lines!!
Welcome to the newbies, and I'm so sorry you have lost your precious angels :hug: I hope your stay in here is a very short one.
So I'm spreading loads of baby dust and sticky vibes in here, and hope this group gets smaller and smaller!
Lots of hugs to all,
B xxx
Hi Beata :hello:
It is so good to hear from you! I don't have the courage to read the BAs so was hoping you would drop by and let us know how you are going. Congratulations on your beautiful little boy - how I long to be tired because of looking after a newborn - you are so very lucky :hug: What name did you give to him? I hope you are all healthy and getting stronger by the day. Happy first Easter to Beata's baby boy!
oxoxoxo
Hi Cheryl! Thank you so much for your warm congrats hun. We named our man Cameron Oliver Mario, my DF liked Cameron and I liked Oliver and we used Mario as that's my dad's name. I feel so blessed hun, and believe me, when it's your turn, you'll take all the tiredness, soreness, and everything else with a smile on your face! Maybe not the sleep depravation...lol.
Have a Happy Easter hun and hang in there! I still stalk you guys (hope you don't mind), maybe not as often now, but I do, just waiting anxiously and excitedly for the next BFP!!
Big hugs!
PS Happy Easter to everyone else! Now we all have a good excuse of stuffing our faces with chcolate! hehehe.
B xxx
Hi Ladies - I am hoping you will have me back!
After taking some time out and re-evaluating things we are full steam ahead ttc #2. I am currently CD 12 with a scan yesterday showing that I have three follies maturing (2 x 12mm and 1 x 10mm) showing that I responded to the 150mg dose of clomid. YAY!!! Another scan on Tues to see where they are up to and to be triggered if ready to O.
Beata - So happy that you are settling in well with your little Cameron :D Congrats again!
Berry - Congrats on little Liam - hope all is well so far
Blessed - Well done on your exams - all of your hard work is paying off!!!
Chez - How are you? Hope all is on track for you.
Hi to everyone else - Im sorry there is so many now I will have to try to keep up!
Happy Easter to all xxxx
Aries...welcome back hun. Lovely to hear you are back on the bus! It surely is a bus in here in now which is both sad and a blessing i guess. Too many people in a similar boat but then more support than ever. Good Luck for this cycle...I hope the Easter Bunny brings you more that just chocolate eggies.
Beata, Wow hun. I am so glad you came by here too. CONGRATULATIONS! A very strong name. So very happy for you. I hope we all follow in your footsteps. I hope it all went well and are feeling well too.
Love and best wishes
Just dropping in everyone to say Happy Easter and long live Chocolate! Feeling a bit gloomy and pensive today. My self induced pregnancy shock therapy is having a bit of an affect atm. I am feeling a bit sad for myself and altogether left out. I hate having left those blissful and innocent feelings behind. I get a bit carried away with celebrating everyone else and forget to leave time for me. It is funny, i know all of this sounds entirely contradicting... but i just want to be alone right now. I get angry that i feel i must be normal for everyone around me. I am convinced of it too i guess. I love my loved ones but these days i feel a bit resentful that i think of them all, do things for them, celebrate their journey's no matter how hard that might be for me and no one considers me. My mother will ring, but that is for her benefit alone...that is for sure. This does get really lonely too often. The main people in my life right now are pregnant, four of them so if I am to socialize it is with this...pregnancy. You might think, well I have asked for it, and yes i probably have just by being who i am. Taking photos and making things for them. I don't know how to exist without doing these things. I am not sure how to protect myself sometimes and let my spirit live too. I think i need to be thought of once in a while. It is not too much to ask.
Thanks for listening to me vent and pity myself for a moment. I will sort it. xoox
Happy Easter.
HM xoxo
Hi everyone!
Sorry I have been MIA. My computer was unable to connect to the internet an entire week! It was terrible!
Beata- Congrats! I am so glad you dropped by!
Aries- welcome back! It is great to hear from you again. Fingers crossed for those eggies!
Chez- Sounds like good news all around. I am glad things are going well with DH. I took to speaking with my DH about the same thing, but it looks like I am not having as much success. I dunno...Maybe I will talk to him again about it later. Sounds liek things are lining up for you. I wish you the best with the IVF!
dory- Sounds like you and your friend might be moving away from eachother, but I have had plenty of friendships that have come back after that. I hope things are going well for you! I have also seen Julie and Julia and thought it was really cute! I have been thinking about you being on bed rest, how are you passing the time? reading and movies?
blessed- CONGRATS on your exam! Hooray!
Gigi1- Your last post made me cry. it truly was beautiful. I understand so much how you feel. Just about all who are close to me are pregnant, and I am trying so hard to support them and be involved in their lives, but every time it feels like a little pin***** in my heart. Last weekend I sat in the shower and cried for about 10 minutes on just how unfair things can be. You are completely allowed to be a little selfish. I really admire how strong you are and am amazed at everything you are doing for your family and friends when I know sometimes there is that little voice saying when will it be my turn? Happy Easter to you and may the chocolate help you feel a little better!
Tenibear and crumpet- Robert (my DS) was due on April 27th. I can feel the date looming. Keep me posted on your plans. right now I just want to take the day off of work and probably stay home and have some good tears. I miss him so much!
AFM- So I took another hpt this morning and it was negative. I am 10 days post ovulation....ARGH! I believe the test. I feel like what are we doing wrong? But I am not as upset as last time around. I guess there is still a little hope till AF arrives, but I really don’t have any. And I was really thinking that this might be it. At least I get to have a beer with my colleagues this afternoon- we are celebrating the beautiful day here with drinks today…..so I wanted to know if I could partake a beer or not… It is crazy though because I thought I really was experiencing some symptoms, but I guess it was all on my head. I have been super emotional lately--I dunno if it is PMS or what but I am crying at a lot of things and feel quite silly a lot of the time. I wonder if I should go and see someone has this happened to anyone else? I am also really debating temping and doing OPK next cycle...our vacation will be in the middle and maybe I just need a little break. I don't know. Any thoughts!
Anyway love to you all!
I missed you when I was stuck being not connected (a horrible way to be)
Since Ianto's due date is on a Friday, I'm starting to think of maybe having a party - but how would I word the invitations? :lol:
I want to have a get-together of some sort, because I'd like to do a balloon release (we were supposed to have one at the funeral, but there was a mix-up with who was meant to organise them :cry:)
ETA: I had a dream last night about holding a little girl post-birth. Very similar to one I had when I was about 15 weeks with Ianto that ended up similar to real events (I was trying to breastfeed a little boy who wouldn't/couldn't latch)... Could this be a sign of things to come? Stay tuned :p
Tenibear- I just know you will word it beautifully. You have done such wonderful things for Ianto and this will be equally fitting. It sounds like a lovely idea and I am in awe of your strength to do what is right for you and your DH. I hope your dream is a premonition hun, i really do.
Cmegles- Enjoy your drink hun but i hope you will have a different result in a few days. Is it too early to test for you or do you tend to show up early? I hear you re crying in the shower. My husband seem to be the only person that will see me cry these days. Sometimes not even he will be here though is he is at work. I feel like life sometimes moves on too quickly for me. Everyone forgets...you know what i mean. Anyway, thanks for hearing me and sending me such caring words. I can't thank you enough.
AFM- 3 weeks to go until DD's 1 year anniversary of the day she was born. I have to get an announcement ready for the SANDS mag, we have to decide what we want to do, what cake i will make and what else we can do. A tattoo will happen but not until the budget can pay for it which might be a couple of years. We might get a sketch done of her though, for the wall. Black and White i think. I want something of hers in every room of the house.
Oh today, i really miss her.
Love to all xoxo
Hi ladies
I just wanted to pop in and say :hello: and wish everyone a happy Easter, well as happy as it can be anyway as I know a lot of us are going through a difficult time at the moment with significant dates coming up or having just gone. I hope that everyone can decide on something that will resonate with them and allow them to express what they are feeling, whether it be by staying at home and shedding some tears, releasing balloons or having a party. Whatever it is the most important thing is that you have remembered your precious baby and the love that you have in your heart for them.
I wish everyone the courage to ask of others, friends and family, for their love and support for this special time and always, and to have the strength to continue if these people are unable to do that.
Take care all
oxo