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Thread: TTC after Late Loss/Recurrent Miscarriage/Stillbirth after the 1st trimester ~ Jan 07

  1. #19
    kerry Guest

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    Lynn - Mangos aren't that bad if its your only food source so don't feel too bad, you picked something pretty good to get by on. I had gd with bridie and ate a lot of Low Gi stuff. I have a low GI/low carb recipe book/diet plan that you are welcome to have (I have coppied the recipies I loved into my recipe book (call it caligraphy practice, or busying myself so i don't have to deal with things more like) so i would be happy to send it too you. Anyway if you are intersted my email is jmcarey76 @ hotmail . com
    There are so great recipies in it. Its called Low Carb made Easy but is really moe low GI than anything like atkins.


  2. #20

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    That's good to know - thanks! At the time I wasn't really thinking about what I was eating and what was good for me. I would love to get some recipies that are low gi - I will email you.

  3. #21

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    Hi girls,

    well this is about the tenth time ive typed everything and hopeful I will hit send rather then delete! Ive been reading through catching up boy you guys can post.

    Spring Im so so happy for you even though you are not getting to excited im think im doing it for you, big for you both and I hope your move is a smooth one. Thank you for you wonderful words when I lost the plot it made me feel.....well it made me feel good inside thank you once again.

    Lynn I glad to hear your feeling a little better today I hope it continues im sure it will as Cooper is with you, helping you through your rough days.The garden sounds like its comming along I would love to see a photo when your done, if you dont mind that is. The angel magnet was just........beautiful.

    Kirsty Im glad that you got some answers. I have had different levels through out my seven years of trying, some being very high to just inside norm limits, some Drs say that after pregnancy there can be higher but my specialist said that he was going to treat me for + anyway it can't hurt so I have both clexcane and asprin. Good luck with your test and have a great night away wish DH a big happy birthday, mine is 40 this year and he wants to do the big party a night away sounds great.

    Jo I was so sorry to hear of all your angel babies it must be so hard for you at the moment. Good luck with everything.

    Clare Lots of ++++thoughts your way for the scan on wed. Its all going to be good.

    Mel Thank you for your support and kind words, you girls sure know how to make me feel better. As for weight gain Ive put on 8kilos since starting pred. so I know what you mean Ive lost a little but have a long way to go, while I was pregnant with DS I put on 8kilos and lost the lot but once we started IVF etc etc I have put on a massive 18kilos!!! I also have pcos which adds to the problem, but when we finish all our baby stuff I will do lots more. At the moment I do 4-5 gym classes a week and walk once a week, we watch what we eat and still it creeps on!!! boy I would be the size of a whale if I dnt do anything mind you when pregnant I only walk 2-3 times a week that all im allowed! It will come off it just takes time......seems like everyhting in life it takes time!

    Deb How are you? are you back and did you have a great time?

    To anyone else hope you are all good and well once Ive caught up on all the post I write if Ive missed you.

    Me........well beside a small breakdown, I think I totally lost the plot, I was trying so hard to stay + BUT it just was not working. Thnak god for wonderful husbands im not sure that I would have coped. Its seems that every other time I was pregnant and lost my babies there was a light at the end of the tunnel that is there was something else we could try next time. But this time even though we can increase meds and add somethings I still know in the back of my head that we might be at teh end of the line and where else is there to go.........and this is really hard to deal with, my whole thing of beening a women and giving birth once more was beening questioned. So I have to deal with this which Im happy to say is a little clear after a number of appoinment with my "head Dr" . We have also made some strong decisions and that is to give next month one more go at getting pregnant, if this is not a goer then surrgacy is our option and something we are looking into at the moment......People have many differant reactions but we have spoken to a councillor and think we should be able to cope. If anyone has any info I would love to hear it. So I would just love to thank you all for your wonderful words of support for me when I was in my darkest times, You dont know how much you all helped me through and I only hope I can be there for you if you ever need it.

    I did mean what I said about wishing you all the very very best in this year and I dearly would love to see you all holding your babes in arms soon So if you would still have me I would love to continue with you all. xxx

    Ps sorry about the long post
    Last edited by dream; January 15th, 2007 at 06:52 PM.

  4. #22

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    Yes I hit send!!!!!!!!!!!

  5. #23

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    Hey everyone,

    Dream - I'm glad you had the support of your husband and I hope that you are feeling a little bit better and positive about trying for another bubby. I truely hope that you get your BFP next month - you deserve it so much. In terms of surrgacy, I don't know anything about it and therefore can't give you advice only to say that I know what it is like to want a baby and if this is an option for you - then go for it! Wishing you all the best.
    I would love to show you Cooper's garden when it is finished. Thank you for asking to see it.
    I would love for you to stay on this thread and let us know how you go next month with TTC. Hopefully there will be BFP all round.

    Hope everyone else is ok - it was pretty quiet here yesterday.

    Well for me, I had a mixed day yesterday. I think I told you a friend that lives down the road had a baby - well DH saw her DH at the servo yesterday morning and her DH said to mine happy new year and my DH said happy new year and congratulations (on the birth of their baby). He just said thanks and that was it. I got so upset when my DH was telling me - I said to him, did he not even say sorry for your loss or how are you holding up. Cooper was born, I want him to be acknowledged. He is my boy and it upset me that he didn't even say anything about him. I know that people find it hard to say things but you can at least say you are sorry for our loss to show that you care and acknowledge him. DH said that I shouldn't let things like this worry me but it is hard not to. Just because Cooper is not physically here with us, he is in my heart and dreams and he should not be forgotten and ignored by other people.

    What brightened up my day was seeing Cooper's star (Cooper has a star registered in his name in the Southern Cross constellation). We could see the Southern Cross easily last night and you can even see the fifth star which is sometimes hard to see. The Southern Cross is getting higher in the sky so the city lights aren't drowning it out as much. Anyway, we looked through the telescope and we could see his star (it is just next to the fifth star). I pretended that I could see him on the star and that he was waving at me. It made me cry but for once I think they were happy tears. My baby boy is shining bright and watching over me - love you Coopie, forever in my heart and dreams.

  6. #24

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    Hi everyone,

    Well where are you girls, I know spring is moving but ..... I hope the rest of you are all well and good.

    Lyn Im sorry that your neighbour was like that, I understand when you say you want people to acknowledge Cooper, but I found that the more I talk about my babies and what Ive been through(not everything) just what they need to know, then people seem to feel more comfortable about asking questions or talking about it with me, I agree that people dont know what to say and something simple would be better then nothing but human nature I think makes us this way unless we have been through an experience like you or I have.

    I have to go my neighbours husband just came in his wife just miscarried. I'll post later.

  7. #25

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    Thanks Dream. I agree something simple is better than nothing. I am so sorry about your neighbour.

    Where is everyone else? Spring how did the move go?

  8. #26

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    Hey everyone,

    Have been MIA for a couple of days, was going through withdrawals! Went to tennis last night and unfortunately had to sit and watch Lleyton Hewitt I really wanted to see Federer cause he is pretty cute but instead I got Hewitt who I just can't stand. Anyway, went home at the end of the 4th set because I am such an old granny I started nodding off in my chair, lol.

    Nat, glad to hear you are feeling a little better. Your neighbour who is miscarrying... is she the one who made the insensitive remarks recently or is she a different neighbour?

    Lynn, it is pretty insensitive that the guy down the street didn't say anything. I think it doesn't hurt to say even a little something just as an acknowledgement, but then I am not afraid of the subject and I think alot of people are. Not an excuse by any means. Plus he is probably so wrapped up in his own world that they just forget other people have things going on as well. I am glad you got to see Cooper's star, maybe that is a sign he really is up there watching over you and he was just saying hello

    Well I am not sure when Spring will get back on, she said her internet at home isn't up and running yet but she would try to visit an internet cafe. She said it was a massive move. I think its a nightmare moving a few suburbs away let alone a whole other state :eek:

    Kirsty, hope you had a great night away with DH. As you probably know they have also just found the anticardiolipin antibodies in my blood test so I am curious... do the levels go up and down or have I misunderstood your post? Is it possible they will ever go away and I wouldn't have to worry anymore (sorry, probably stupid question)? I haven't been able to find too much information on it online unfortunately so don't have too much of an idea of what it is other than the basics until I see OB on 14/2.

    Everyone else, hope you are all well and looking after yourselves

    Mel

  9. #27

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    Hey Mel - sorry you didn't get to see Federer and that you had to see Lleyton :frown: If you think you are an old granny - what am I? I went to bed after the second set!!!! He wasn't playing very well and I thought he was going to lose, plus I was tired so I thought I may as well go to bed.

    What are anticardiolipin antibodies in your blood? What does this mean and what does it mean for your next pregnancy?

    I read in one of your previous messages that Nicholas weighed 5lb9oz at birth and your first ob said that he was a good size for his dates but your new ob says that he was on the small side. Well I'm confused because Cooper was born 4lb8oz at 37 weeks although he had probably died a few days before. When my ob told me how heavy (or light) he was I asked if that was normal for his dates and he told me that it was because he still would have had 3 more weeks to 'bulk up'. The weird thing is that when I held Cooper he didn't seem that small. I have held new born babies before and while I don't know what their exact weight was they seemed to be the same size as Cooper. I remember saying to DH when I was holding Cooper that he didn't look as small as I had thought he would. I am see my ob tomorrow so I will ask him again. Also you said that Nicholas was 50th percentile for everything at your 34wk ultrasound and then your new ob said that at birth he was in the 25th percentile - what does this mean. Sorry for all the questions but I have never heard of percentile and just wanted to know what it is. Is it something I should know about?

  10. #28
    clare076 Guest

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    Hi all
    Firstly I want to apologise if my continued posts in here upsets anyone, it is definately not my intention and I will stop if you want, unfortunately, I just dont yet feel confident to take the step to the other side. Hopefully sometime before this baby is born I will find the strength to make the move.

    Lynn, I would dearly love for you to make me a bracelet, if the offer is still open. I am finding myself missing him so much these days. It's not that I dont want this baby - far from it, I just want my Max too. I can't PM you as I am not platinum, but if I give you my email address (I think I am allowed to do that) maybe you can drop me a line when you are ready. It's [email protected].

    Mel - OMG I envy you going to the tennis. I am a tennis nut. And ditto on Lleyton - I wont even get started on my thoughts on that arrogant young man.

    Spring - honey I know you are moving but I hope when you get back you have some more definate BFP news. My fingers and toes are hurting I have them crossed so tight.

    Me - one word, puckey!!!! I had my first scan today and we have a splodge. God, how is it possible to instantly love something that looks like a smudge of ink? Heart was beating, not sure of rate as I forgot to ask. Bubs was measuring about 5 weeks and 6 days, but smaller than Shelby was at that gestation. I dont quite understand that but she assured me all was well. So I am off to my GP on friday, and I am going to request another scan in 3 weeks just for my own peace of mind.

    Take care
    Hugs and sloppy kisses

  11. #29

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    Hey Lynn,

    I am not exactly sure what these antibodies are but my OB told me briefly on the phone when he rang with the results that they attack the bodies own cells and in my case being the placenta which caused the placenta to come away from the uterine wall and apparently these antibodies are more likely to cause early miscarriage but in some cases cause mid-late term loss (please someone correct me if I am wrong cause this is just what I understand). I am not exactly sure how or why all of this happens or even how these antibodies build up in your system but from what I understand they are just something in your body make up, just like I have blue eyes its just part of me. I really do want to find out more but I think I will have to wait until 14 Feb when I see OB, I will let you know more when I get the info. He also told me that if the antibodies kick in during third trimester like they did in my case the babies generally start to drop off some weight beforehand. In my case it would explain why Nicholas dropped weight somewhere in the 2 weeks prior to passing away, so he suspects that the antibodies didn't kick in until around 34-35 weeks. Apparently it can be treated with low dose Aspirin and maybe something else as well but I am not too sure what, he said we would discuss it further when I came in to see him. He said with this treatment I have an excellent chance of delivering a healthy baby but without it I have medium to high risk of the same thing happening to my next baby (boy am I happy I switched OB's!)

    I am not sure about the weight thing, your OB may be right and I wouldn't like to suggest otherwise cause obviously I am no expert. Nicholas was as you said 5lb9oz which is the equivalent to approx. 2.5kgs and my new OB checked this chart he had and said that he should have been 2.8kgs at 36 weeks gestation. The percentile is the percentage of babies who are born with that weight, height or so on. So at the 34 week scan he was in the 50th which is pretty much spot on average, and in the last scan he was in the 25th which means he was then below average. I don't know if that makes sense but basically if you have three lines and the one in the middle is average, on one side you have below average and the other side you have above average - Nicholas at 34 weeks was on the middle line and at birth was half way between the 1st and middle lines making him in the 25th percentile for gestation. Aaaaah sorry I have probably just confused you even more, maybe someone else here will kindly explain it in better terms than I have. I have to admit that I did believe he was a good size simply because I know some full term babies are born at 5lb something, so needless to say I was quite shocked when the OB said "so he was on the small side then?". You are right that they bulk up in the last few weeks thought, I was told that the last few weeks of gestation literally are just fattening up. Again, I could be wrong it is just what I have heard.

    Sorry I can't give you any more info, I am dying for some myself. I have tried to do research on the internet but I had to stop because I came away thinking oh my god I have lupus, oh my god I have this, oh my god I have that. I found one article that said it has been linked to cancer, so all of a sudden I am dying! lol, I don't really believe that obviously but that is why I stopped looking and thought maybe I should just wait to see the OB before I start self diagnosing.

    Good luck tomorrow with your OB appointment, don't stress too much about the weight thing cause I am sure every doctor has their own opinions and who is to say who is right and wrong. Be sure to let us know how you get on

    Take care,

    Mel

    P.S. I don't think any of what I have written makes sense reading over it so if I am wrong I apologise in advance

  12. #30

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    Hey Clare,

    Please don't feel like you should leave this thread. I would love so much to be pregnant myself but not for one second would I take it away from any of you girls. Everyone here has been through alot and deserve some happiness and good things to happen to them. I have already told Spring that if that BFP is the real deal () that she isn't allowed to leave the thread. I just keep my for you both, and everyone else TTCing. Even when you do feel confident to joint the pregnancy thread, still pop back in here and let us know how you are going. Besides you have to keep in touch cause hopefully we will all be joining you soon!

    Mel

    P.S. Oh, and Bec was there too... I really dislike both of them. I don't know how she found the time to be there in between writing her diary for the Woman's Day, lol.

    P.P.S. Glad your scan went well I have already decided I am going to do what you are doing and get VERY regular scans, like you said just for my own piece of mind. I will put on the if they make me, lol.
    Last edited by Mel1977; January 17th, 2007 at 09:29 PM.

  13. #31

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    Clare - I'm pretty new and don't post much yet (i still struggle with talking about it all) and I don't want to talk for the other ladies, but I think that it's good to hear about your pregnancy. I think it's a positive to everyone ttc to hear a success story. When I lost my daughter I felt so alone and like a bit of a freak to be honest. I thought I was the only one in the world that this had happened to. I also felt unsure about trying again, but I have since found that reading everyones stories and how they are all keeping positive, I feel that I can do it too. So I really think you should stay here with your friends, and who knows how many will be joining you in the near future??
    Mel - can't stop laughing about your Bec Hewitt/Womans Day diary comment ha ha its so true!
    Bailey

  14. #32

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    Evening all,

    Firstly sorry about the end of my post yesterday, I was just typing away when both the phone and door bell went at once DH to tell me about our neighbour (they are good mates from way back) and our neighbour to ask if I could talk to his wife. when it rains it pours in this house!

    I have high levels of Anticardiolipins Antibodies and from what I know and anyone please let me know if this is not right. Are on the arm of the autoimmune system such as lupus, thyroid, phospholpid etc etc. In short sort of, these all can cause the cells known as phospholpid(PHP) moleculs (glue like cells) to cause the blood to stick together and cause clots. I have read that antibodies to phospholipd can interfere with the development of the placenta and that with each pregnancy loss there is an increased chance the mother will develop antibodies to PHP. Because of the blood clots or placenta development the way of thinking is that the fetus is starved, hence the size for age. Along with NK cells I carry a double whammy as this also affects placenta development. My DR seems to think they are all closely linked and I seem to agree. By giving asprin and/or clexane inj this thins the blood and prevents blood clots. It can be very indeepthas to differant types but it seems there are all trated in a similar way, boy I need Deb now to help me out!!!!! As I have said this is my understanding and it would be good to get a Drs opinion.

    Lyn Im so sorry I had to just finish up where I was, I didnt get to finish but I also agree a little is better then nothing and next time you see him or his wife (maybe the wife)I only hope they acknowledge Cooper. I hope you are feeling better today, you sound good.

    Mel Thanks yes Im alot better and yes this was my neighbour who made the remarks not so long ago. My god I would never ever wish something like this on anyone but it makes you stop and think about how uncanny life is. She was have a D&C today I think it is only just sinking in at the moment the next few weeks will be hard but Ive told her if she needs anything.......well you all know, but the weird thing was she told me she didnt know how I have done this so many times and I was the first person she though of lying there and how she now understands how hard it is. I only wish she could have felt this without having to walk the road........As far as Lleyton Im with you I also went to bed after 2nd set BORING! But was it great just to be out there? Very jealous!

    Clair How could you leave us, I want to hear all about this special little splodge. Please hang around, you give me something to aspire to! I so glad to hear that all is going well Im sending you lots of sticky vibes and lots of prays to for a wonderful pregnancy ahead, im so happy for you I hope the next 3weeks flys by.

    Deb are you back yet, how was you holiday?

    Spring I hope this sydney heat has not been to unkind, you both must be so tired. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

    To anyone else I hope that you are all keeping well and please let me know if I have it all wrong, as I said this is just my understanding it its only basic as I could go indeepth and be here all night long, but im off to bed so good night all, sleep tight and sweet dreams.xxxx

    p.s Ds was 2.59kilos(5.8pound) at 36 weeks and I was told he was on the smaller side at the time and also by one other speclst, so this may have a lot to do with it all
    Last edited by dream; January 17th, 2007 at 10:14 PM.

  15. #33
    clare076 Guest

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    I honestly cant see what Bec sees in Lleyton, personally I think she should have stuck with Beau Brady he was lovely. Drives me mad everyone makes them out to be the perfect love story when in actually fact they were a young couple, together for a matter of weeks, shagging like mad, accidently fell pregnant and decided to get married to make things right. (hmmm, that may not have come out the way I intended, but in my mind it made perfect sense) Now WD make her out to be this genius Mum, because she can balance looking after a baby and jet setting around the world. BIG DEAL. I can wash, cook, and clean with Shelby on my hip, I am even teaching her to hold my hair back when i puke.

    As far as frequent scans go, I figured if I am paying for them, they dont really have a right to say no. But turning on the water works always helps.

    Hee hee just realised I have been writing this whole spill on lleyton and bec and the thread had already moved on about 3 posts. Sorry got caught in the moment.

    I just want to say thanks girls for keeping me around, I feel safe with you all here. I feel I have developed a bond with you all in such a short period of time. Bailey - you make me feel like I need to be more positive about this baby than I have been, I feel I owe you all a healthy bubs so I will do my best to remain positive. *mwah*
    Last edited by clare076; January 17th, 2007 at 10:05 PM.

  16. #34

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    Boy my post was so long that you all were here the same time and Clare you go girl Bec has no idea when it comes to real women like you, she prob has a house cleaner, cook and full time nanny and if she gets pregnant again will have someone puke for her!!!!

    Girls when Im pregnant i have a scan every week! I dont ask I tell them Ill see them next week! so your right we pay for it why not if it means peace of mind then do it. That sounds like a good add for sportsware!
    Last edited by dream; January 17th, 2007 at 10:11 PM.

  17. #35
    clare076 Guest

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    I rememer her saying the only thing that fixed her m/s was water and apples. WTF!!! What about KFC zinger burgers and chocolate. NO ONE CRAVES APPLES AND WATER YOU MAD WOMEN.

  18. #36

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    Yeah they do make her out to be mother of the year (or decade) but lets face it it's not that hard to be the best mother in the world when you can afford the best nanny, the best chef, the best maid and the best hair and make up people to make you look like you have slept all night... come on, they don't fool me I don't know how she even went there though, I don't like her but admittedly she is not bad looking whereas he is absolutely hideous (harsh but fair!) and I cringe just thinking about it... think happy thoughts, think happy thoughts, lol.

    Nat, it is weird how the universe works isn't it. While I know you would have never wished this on her it must feel good to know she has seen the error of her ways. My god, I have thought quite a few times about different people that I just wish they knew how I felt. It is sad for her all the same, but she is lucky that she has you for support. Oh, by the way I still win the award for longest post, you have a way to go to beat me, lol

    Bailey, glad you are still dropping in

    P.S. Nat, was typing at the time... great minds think alike!
    Last edited by Mel1977; January 17th, 2007 at 10:17 PM. Reason: add ps

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