TTC after Stillbirth/Recurrent Miscarriage or Loss after the 1st Trimester

Spring - I'm so happy that lil' Spring is bouncing around in there. It must have been so exciting to have DH with you for the scan. I hope Frankie is ok with this storm that is going over.

Well the nutcase is back. Not sure what was going on with my temps this morning, but guess who arrived at my place??????????????? Yep the wicked witch has arrived. I don't know whether I should cry or be happy so I will do both :crying: :confetti: I guess in a way I am upset because another month has passed and nothing! I have failed yet again. But at the same time I am happy because it means that this is the start of a new cycle and this cycle has a plan. A plan that is going to work - I'm sure of it! I can promise you that this is the last time that the witch is coming to my place this year!!! So now I am just praying for some good eggies this month :pray:

Hi Lynn

I don't know if I should be happy with you or cry with you about AF arriving, but at least the wait is over. I hope she is kind that that the eggies are fantastic and I hope that

:sperm: + :egg: + :bd: = :bfp: for you this month.

Luv Spring

I love your post Spring! lol

I guess the hardest part is knowing that I have such long cycles and that my BFP probably won't be here until next month. But what can you do. At least my luteal phase was longer this cycle so that is good thing. I just need to :pray: that I have good :egg:

And the booties full of *alfie* dust ;) I'll post them in the morning!!!

Lynn: It must be an added frustration having such long cycles, but you are right, it is great that your LP was longer. How long was it this time?

Mel: Hey hon, are you out there? I don't want to bother you but I am thinking about you and DH and I hope today was all good news.

Well it seems another storm is on its way so I am going to stick around for a while. Spoke to the Vet about Franks freak outs which seem to be getting heaps worse and she wants to give me to give him mild sedative so that he doesn't hurt himself. Just pop one in his gob if I know the storm is coming. Apparently as they get used to the thunder you can reduce the dose to zero. On Sunday he got so upset and after running around non stop (I just couldn't stop him) he got all wobbly almost collapsed from exhaustion. A big scare and I don't want him to hurt himself.

Check in later alligators.

Luv Spring

Michelle, you are a bootie machine!!!!

Anyway, how are you feeling? That ticker is getting to be pretty impressive, are you feeling any more at ease (if that is at all possible)?

Luv Spring

Thanks Michelle, I really appreciate them. I'll let you know when I receive them.

Spring - my cycle this month was 37 days with 11 days LP. I have read that between 10-16 is normal. OMG! Am I normal for something! lol. I bet it doesn't say anywhere that 37 days is normal! Oh well. This cycle was actually longer than the last one which was 29 but I only had 7 days LP. I am just happy that my LP is longer. Hopefully this means something - like my body is sorting itself out................only time will tell.

11 days is great Lynn, I fell pregnant this time with a 12 day LP so only one day more. I hope your bod is just sorting itself out.

Helloooo:hello: gals,
man ya'll can talk huh?

Dream - Oh just Bali...lol, don't I sound ungrateful?? I am a travel agent and go there a bit, so it's a bit ho-hum. Don't get me wrong, I love the place and can't wait to go, but I wish we were going somewhere a bit more exciting. I really am not sure what to say about letting your son see your grandmother, it's a big decision. But reading Michelles post, I think maybe you should let him go and see her. I think it is a hard thing to do when they are at any age, but I would hate for him to not see her and then you may regret it later iykwim. It must be hard, you just want to protect them from what goes on in the world. My DS said to my mum today "My baby is broken, we have to get a new one" Mum just burst into tears. I just don't know what to tell him. I think this is his limit of understanding at the moment, so I may just leave it at that for now until he needs to know more. I guess it is age appropriate for him, but if your son understand's death, maybe it will be OK to take him along?? I am not sure, it must be so hard to decide.

Lynn - Well, I too am sad/happy for AF arriving. But at least you can now look forward to a fresh month, and putting you plan into action with your ob. Plus with your booties, baby dust and moonstone, oh and a little work from DH that witch won't stand a chance next month. My cycles are long too, I used to enjoy that, but it's not much fin when ttc is it? I had 36 days between the 1st and 2nd and then 34 days between the 2nd and this one. I have no idea when I will ovulate or anything, I am just going to wing it I guess. Please keep your positive attitude Lynn, it will happen soon I am sure of it:bluedust: Oh I love your ticker, I might go and get me one too!

Spring - Yay for your naughty Lil Spring. Glad to hear they are jumping around in there. It should only be a month or so til you can feel them. I could feel Asha from about 16 weeks, just little flips and flutters, but I could feel her. Wow, gee I miss her saying that. :( I am glad that DH was there with you too. Also, that is great about you psych backing you up on the delivering early. It is fantastic you have such a "team" working with you. Your poor dogs, I have a lazy staffy who doesn't budge during the storms :) though he will run to the end of the earth for a crumb.

Mel - How did you go today with DH's doctor visit? Thanks for that recipe, I will try it out on the weekend.

Hi to Flowerchild and Michelle.

I'm good Spring. I have a new sense of peace having reached the milestone. *alf* is a busy little boy who entertains me with his activities. Sometimes I wish I knew what he was up to in there - but then again, maybe I don't!!! As for the booties, they are small and a nice way to pass the time. I should be doing my niece's cross-stitch but the knitting is more fun :D

Big hello to everyone - I hope you are having a lovely night. I need to get back to the knitting .....

Oh Michelle, I didn't realise *alf* was a boy. That is wonderful. Congratulations.

I'm off to bed soon so Big hugs and nighty ni

Luv Spring.

Yep - a little boy :D But only the BB girls (and DH and BF) know ;)

Hi all, I havent been around cause its been a busy day... and it has taken me a while to read through all the posts LOL.

Spring - So happy lil Spring is doing well and that DH got to see him/her. I bet this has made his feelings towards the pregnancy alot more real and you will probably find he is different when you talk about everything with him with is fantastic. I am really glad to hear your psych will support you through everything, and also contact your OB on your behalf. I agree with him, if the time comes and you are stressing to the max he will have to reassess the plan for yours and lil Spring's sake. Wow, you wont know yourself with DH home last night and also on the weekend - but I am glad he is gonna be there, lets face it the reason we marry them is cause we kinda like having 'em around.

Lynn - I am sorry that AF showed, but also not sorry iykwim cause im wrapped you can now begin your next cycle and plan everything. Very happy to see you now have a TTC ticker, hated being the only one ;) Can I ask a really dumb question? If you have a longer cycle, like you said your last one was around 37 days - how do they work out how far pregnant you are? I mean cause you know for me who generally has a 28 day cycle, on the day your period is due you would technically be 4 weeks pregnant. So how would you calculate it if you have a long cycle? I am sorry I know I sound like a bimbo, but I thought ahh well it doesnt hurt to ask. Oh and by the way, I hope she doesnt give you too much grief this month, and I am positive it will be her last visit for 8-9 months!

Bailey - I am like you, I get myself all upset if I think too much about the feeling of Nicholas moving around inside. I remember I used to complain to DH all the time cause I am sure he would plant the boots into my left ribs all the time, like he was in there saying yeah take that! I would give anything to have him kicking me now, but what can ya do. I hope you like the recipe, and that DS enjoys it - although he will probably prove me wrong.

Deb - I agree with Spring, you are a wealth of knowledge and you continue to impress me more and more with each day that passes.

Michelle - Your nephew sounds like such a little sweetie, sorry just had to say that. I have a 3yo nephew and love him to bits, he is also an old soul I think.
I think what you tell him about the seed is a perfect thing to say, and I will keep it in mind cause we have been talking about what to say and when to tell DHs kids next time. They are 5 and 6 (well and a 2 year old but she just plays and I dont think she understood anything that was going on when I was pg or when we lost Nicholas) and I want them to know early but then keep worrying what if I m/c and then have to explain it, its a tough one.

Nat - My pa (dads dad) died when I was 7 and I remember seeing him in the hospital, he had a heart attack, and also going to his funeral. He was my favourite person in the world and I was his, my grandmother said to him once when I was naughty "she could kill the queen and you'd say she had a good reason" and he said "yes and so she would". I would be so sad now thinking I hadnt had the chance to say goodbye, I remember him and his death and funeral very clearly which is weird for a 7 year old but none of those memories haunt me or anything, they are just memories. My aunty also died when I was 10 and same with her I got to go to the funeral, she died suddenly so it wasnt the same situation, but I remember the day the police knocked on the door to tell my parents she had died. I do remember that funeral with sadness and I remember very vividly that they played the song The Rose which we played at Nicholas funeral, but again I am grateful I got to go. DHs 3 children went to Nicholas' funeral also, as well as my nephew who turned 3 in Feb this year. We thought they had the right to say goodbye and also felt that as sad as it is death is a part of life and while it is the job of adults to protect children, to a certain degree it is best not to shelter them from the bad things in life. I agree with the other girls, it is ultimately your decision and you are the one who knows your son and what he is or isnt capable of coping with but it might be worth asking him what he really wants and giving the facts and in a way letting him choose. At 8 years old kids can be so wise, but yet in some ways so young. I think they are capable of handling things more easily than we think they can sometimes. Anyway, I guess it is like we have said about everything else in our lives whatever you do will be what you thought was right at the time and therefore no regrets. Thinking of you and your family :hug:

Well as for me, DH is doing well - his bum a little sore HEHE (dont tell him I laughed at that) but we dont get the results until next week so I will have to update you later on that one. My interview went ok, didnt get as good results as last place I saw but they were still happy and said to let them know if and when I want work cause they have it coming out of their ears.

The cemetary rang DH this morning and said that we can pick Nicholas up on the weekend, actually we can tomorrow but because DH is working it has to wait until Saturday so I am pretty happy with that.

One last thing to end this lengthy post (making up for no other posts today ;) ) is can anyone tell me what they think may be going on with me? As I mentioned I got AF one day early this month which is weird because every other month since having Nicholas it has been like clockwork and lasts about 5-7 days. Anyway, I AF arrived Sunday night and yesterday I didnt get any bleeding which was odd but I thought it would come back today but again today nothing! Which makes me think AF has finished and in that case only lasted 2 days... Do you think there is a problem? Or is it normal for it to be one way and then just change for no reason? Its kind of worrying me, especially cause it has been 6 months since Nicholas was born and I am STILL not pregnant :dunno:

Sorry again for long one.

Take care, hi to everyone I missed.

Mel

Hey Mel - I'm so happy that you get to bring your little boy home soon :hug: It will be a tough day but also a very special day. I will be thinking of you on Saturday. Everyday I still think about when I am going to take Cooper to his garden. I just don't know, it is such a tough decision.
I'm glad that DH is going to be ok. I hope you get the results soon.
I think I am the last person to give you advice on AF!!!!! Look at me, I am so not regular or clockwork, but I hope someone will be able to give you some advice. Are you going to have some tests done? What's the plan? I think you need a plan this month Mel.
In regards to working out how far I am, they will go off when I ovulate because they will know this. This happened to me with Cooper and I was always interested to see when he would arrive to see if they had the dates right. I guess they also go off measurements of bub. I'll let you know next month eh!

Bailey - wow it could be a busy month for this thread. 3 of us might be graduating together - I wish we all could :grouphug: I thought I better get a ticker so you can keep up with what day I am at although it is already wrong. It hasn't ticked over to day 2, not sure how to fix it but will try. It is probably on US time.

Hi to everyone else. Hope you are having a good Friday.

Wow its been quiet in here today huh!

Hey Lynn - I am looking forward to having him home, only 1 more sleep to go :D Re having tests done this month, I dont know if there is anything they can do. DH has to have his swimmers tested but he cant get in for that until 31st March (which I am sure he is happy about) and I have a Levovist booked in for 2 April. Other than that the infertility specialist is on 15 May and that is all they can do because they have confirmed I have O'd. I guess I just have to keep planning as per usual that I will O on or around CD14 and hope for the best. Its just really made me feel uneasy that I only had AF 2 days, I have never had such a short one in my whole life. I dont know, I am hoping it is this month but I dont like my chances - I have been hoping every other month and it hasnt happened. My sister says I need to think positively but I am finding it almost impossible. I guess it doesnt really matter if you have to wait for a scan to be given a due date huh, I mean you will know roughly how far along you are and the main thing is you are pregnant huh. I would love so much for all of us to get one this month :crossfingers: :crossfingers: :crossfingers:

How have you been today? Do you have to have more BTs this month? Dont worry about your ticker, mine was behind the whole way through my last cycles and the only way I got it to be right this time is because I told it AF arrived on the Sat instead of the Sun just so it would look right.

Hi to everyone else, hope you are all well.

Mel

Hey Mel,

How was your day? Hope you are doing ok. Your sister is only trying to help, just like my family. They keep telling me to be positive but like you, I find it hard. Are you using OPK's to find out when you are O'ing. I know you hate them but have they worked for you in the past? I guess the only other thing to do is :bd: every second day from CD10 until you have o'd.

I have been ok today. My friend from work came over this morning. I haven't seen anyone from work since I lost Cooper. I have spoken to the boss but that was it. She said that everyone would love to see me but I am scared to walk into that place because the whole time I was pregnant, plus every second person is either pg, just had a baby or their partner is pg............agh! Something in the water! I think I need to bite the bullet and go in so I told her I would ring her Monday morning and see how I am and probably go in on Monday afternoon.

I have also been busy booking myself in for things......dentist, hairdresser, facial - maybe if I feel good, it will help!

I have also booked into the fertility clinic - here goes!!!! They are going to start BT on CD9 which is next Saturday and then they will do BT every day or second day depending on what my levels are like. I'm going to be a pin cushion again!!! I don't care what they have to do as long as by the end of this I get my BFP :pray:

I will be thinking of you tomorrow. It will be so nice to have your special little boy home with you at last :hug: Give him a big hug from me.

Luv & hugs
Lynn
xxx

p.s. I think our tickers are wrong because they are based on US time.

Hi Girls,

Spring Wonderful news on little spring bean it sounds like he/she is jumping around which is great. Is it true your 12weeks next week? where did that time go? It must be such a hard decision on which way to labour im sure when the time comes something will lead you to the right decision. I hope you have agreat weekend with DH and hes not to tired.

Lynn Wow mixed emotions....Iam happy for you that now you can start a new path to that baby making but sad the witch arrived. Im sending with all I have that this month will be the one.

Michelle Alf sounds like he will be a very active little boy!!! trust me all boys are. Thanks you the booties I will give you my email if you want to send me yours and I can send my address......if any of that amkes sence!! Thank you for sgaring your story and thoughts with me, its all reaffirmed my decision.

Mel Sorry poor old DH bum!!! Im sure all will be good, Its so hard when you just have to wait, I wish I could make "time fly" for you. But maybe while your waiting and making you will make that little bean!!! Lets think positive, also thank you for your help.

Bailey Even though your in travel Im still jealous and the offer to carry the bags is still there! Your brought tears to my eyes with DS comment...the innocence of children, When I was talking to DS about the visit I asked if he was sure he wanted to go he was very sure mum, he wanted to say goodbye to GN as he wont be seeing her for a long time and that when she gets to heaven could she tell great pop how much he loves him and still misses him and if she sees Pusscar (our cat that died) could she please give her a pat for him.......this made my mind up there and then with tears in my eyes.

Deb Where are you? Out chasing cows?

I will have to go my girfriend has just arrived with her three boys so I must be off but should get back as DH is out for the night and I might get to use the computer for a change!!! hope you all have a great afternoon.

Lynn we posted at the same time almost!!

Oh Nat - your son is just beautiful. Your post brought tears to my eyes too. Children are so innocent.............why can't we stay like that!

In a way, and yes you can call me a freak if you like, I wouldnt mind having all those bloods. Although its easy for me to say as needles dont bother me, and I am thinking that at least it gives you something to focus on rather than just sitting around waiting and hoping iykwim. You will be a pin cushion but hopefully a pregnant pin cushion by the months end :) I wasnt planning on using OPKs this month, they have I guess worked in previous months but last month it gave me all negative and I stressed about it and then got the BT done which said I had Od so I wonder if its better to do what you said and pretty much :bd: (I love that one, hehe) every couple of days through the month - wont DH be in his element - and every day for the 4-5 days surrounding O time. Not much else I can do really.

It might make you feel good to catch up with some of your work friends. If you dont want to go back into work can you arrange to meet them all for a coffee at lunch time or after work? I remember I was having panic attacks in the night before I was due to go into work again, but it didnt end up being so bad and everyone was really good about it all. In saying all that, if it gets to Monday afternoon and you change your mind I am sure everyone will understand.

Good on you for doing some things that make you feel good, not really sure how the dentist fits in there (LOL) but everything else sounds great. I have a voucher that my mum gave me at my baby shower to have a massage but I cant bring myself to go get it, just knowing it was meant to be after I had my baby makes me feel weird about going.

I hope you have a nice Friday night... we are off to buy a mobile phone cause mine died today :angry: Lucky I have a company so the company will now be a mobile phone richer.

Take care,

Mel

Sorry Nat I didnt see your post til after I posted. Your DS sounds like he has a pretty good understanding of the whole "death" issue and I think it is so beautiful he has messages he wants his GN to pass on to his loved ones :hug: What a sweetie!

I know what you mean Mel. I guess I am looking forward to actually "doing" something and focusing on something. This is your month I just know it! You just need to :bd: heaps ( I love that one too so had to use it again - he he)

I know what you mean about using your voucher but I think you should. You deserve to pamper yourself and it may help you to relax as well.

I hope you get a nice new phone. I never get a new phone - just a hand-me-down from DH :(

Ok everyone I have a question to ask and it may be silly but I just don't know how I feel about it or what to do - I have a dinner to go to for DH's work. It is lounge suit and I have a black dress that I wore when I was pg and to Cooper's funeral. It is that baby-doll style, so it is fitted around the (.)(.) and then drops (hence why I could fit into while being pg and after giving birth). It isn't a maternity dress, anyway, i haven't tried it on or anything yet so I don't even know if it will fit properly but I just don't know if I can wear it again after wearing it to Cooper's funeral. I know it is a good excuse to go shopping a buy a new dress but I really don't want to spend any money because with me not working and the cost of the fertility specialist etc etc. Any thoughts???????

Hey gals

I will try to catch up on all your posts and do some decent personals later but I just wanted to say two things.

Lynn: About your dress, I think that if you feel ok with it, you should wear it. Just because you wore it to Cooper's funeral doesn't mean that it should be a sad dress IYKWIM. Perhaps buy a new shoes or bag to wear with it. I am sure Cooper wants mummy to look as gorgeous as she does in that dress.

Mel: I don't want to go putting crazy ideas in your head, but have you done a HPT? The only reason I ask is that you are generally so regular and it sounds like implantation bleeding. I could be completely wrong, but it can't hurt to test.

Be back later.

Luv Spring

HI Everyone,
I am really sorry for my absence. It's been a bit frantic here. I am feeling really really tired with my DH away. I have been getting to bed late and waking early with lots in between!
I just want you to know that I have read all of the news and I will come back later when I haave some time to talk. :hug:

Hi everyone,

Mel - I am glad for you that you get to bring Nicholas home tomorrow. It will be hard, but at the same time it is a relief. I know that when I brought Asha home, I felt that that is where she should be, with us. But it just isn't fair that we have to bring them home like this is it. I will be thinking of you guys tomorrow.

Lynn - About the dress, I have a skirt that I loved, but I wore it to the hospital the day that I found out that Asha had died, and I can't wear it now. I think I will probably throw it. But that is me, if you feel ok in the dress then you should wear it, if it reminds you of Cooper in a good way, then maybe like Spring said, buy something new to wear with it. But if you will feel bad in it all day, than don't wear it. That is good about the fertility clinic. I'm not sure what goes on there, but you have so many plans in place, there is no way your little eggie's will escape too much longer :)

Dream - Your son sounds like a wise young man. He seems to have an idea about death and seems to approach it in a mature way. I think that you are doing the right thing by letting him go and see her.

I am going to try and get the little guy to bed, so I will be back on later.

Evening beautiful women,

I will start where with what I was going to write, I really want to thank you girls for helping with this decision by sharing your stories it made me know that what I was planning was the right thing, DS also attends a catholic school where going to heaven, god and death are talked about freely so I think this makes them better prepared more so then me! But thank you all once again for sharing your thoughts and experiences with me it means so very much.

Mel I will be thinking about you and DH tomorrow when you bring Nicholas home, I hope the sun is shinning on you all. all my love and hugs :hugs: I think you should have that massage, you have had your darling son and you deserve it more then ever, go and rellax it may help move everything on, and oh maybe do a hpk just to rule out or in?

Lynn Maybe try the dress on for a few hours at home and see how you feel, as spring said Cooper would love to see his mummy look lovley and maybe splash out on new accessories. I dont know, the last two tops I wore when I had my last ultrasounds and found out there was no heartbeat I can never where when im pregnant but have since wore them while not its just a superstitious thing not that it made any differance. But see how you feel.

Bailey Good luck puttting DS to bed trust me in a couple of years its so much easier! they tend to do it themselves......I still need to tuck him in, say prays and 5mins of kisses and goodnight cuddles, I cant help it, in a couple more years he wont want to know me :rolleyes:

Oh Mel and Lynn i think :bd: every second day till af arrives is a good one, DH misses al that so much I think thats why he is out tonight its just not the same!!! But I do have the old "You cant complain about how much you get" by the end of a month he has had enough! Since I have the chance Im off to bed ....with DS (has this idea that if dad is not home he should sleep with me....oh well) so goodnight all sweet dreams. Nat xxx

Well no new phone as yet - did you know it is really hard to buy a phone outright these days? I know, neither did I! You can get them on a plan or on pre-paid, but I already have a plan that doesnt end until November so cant do that. Anyway, I have found most of the phones to be really expensive so I am going to think carefully about which one I want before I buy cause it is too much money to just make a spur of the moment decision (although I have pretty much made up my mind).

Lynn - Its a hard one about the dress, but Bailey is pretty much spot on. If it will make you feel good wear it but you think it will bring back sad memories or feelings then maybe dont. I do agree with Spring though, if you decide to wear it go and treat yourself to a new accessory to go with it. Besides the fact it is always nice to have something new, it might make it feel a little different to wear. Maybe try it on and see how it makes you feel?

Bailey - You are right it isnt fair and definitely not the way any of us imagined it, but I am glad he is coming home cause I do feel like his place is with us. I havent been to eager to get him home until we actually went there a couple of weeks ago, but you know once you make that decision you want it to be now.

Spring - I havent done a HPT and I so wish you could be right, but unfortunately the couple of days bleeding I did have was extremely heavy with lots of clots - actually probably heavier than usual - so there is no way I could be pregnant :(

Deb - I can imagine how frantic your household would be on your own. As beautiful as children are, they can be hard work - all well worthwhile but nonetheless it makes for a busy life.

Mel :D

Hi Nat, must have posted at the same time.

I use that "you cant complain you dont get it enough" all the time on DH cause to be honest when it gets to the end of O time the last thing I want to do for a few days is :bd:, so he tries to tell me that its unfair cause he gets used to getting it all the time and then its taken away... whatever! LOL - he makes out like he is joking but sometimes I wonder :rolleyes:

Have a nice sleep with DS.

WOW Spring, I just checked out your ticker and lil Spring is 12 weeks tomorrow :dance: I know there is no "safe" time but still its a bit of a milestone :hug: Finally, you can tell your family - oh your mum is gonna be stoked, and your sis. I bet you are excited, maybe a little nervous too, but I would be dying to let the cat out of the bag.

No more :shhh: YAY!

Mel - I will be thinking of you so much tomorrow my love. It's a big day and a very very special one. Your little boy is coming home and I am so happy for you... :hugs: Mel - when did you last do a hpt? It did cross my mind also with the shorter period...

Lynn: Yay for your period - now let's get down to business hey! CD9 and it all starts - it will be worth all of those sticks just to get a picture of what is happening in that wonderful body of yours. It won't be long Lynn and we will be congratulating you on your :bfp:
With regard to the dress. I am a bit like Bailey. I can't wear the clothes I was wearing when I found my babies were gone. I threw them in the lifeline bin and never wore them again. But that is me. If you feel good in the dress and you won't associate it with the sadness then tht is wonderful. Otherwise I think it's a good excuse to get something new and glam! :hug:
Spring: YIPPPEEEE on Lil Spring doing all she/he should! You are nearly through the first trimester. I am so so happy for you Spring. :hug:

Nat: it is good to see you again.

Well, I have had a huge coulple of days. We went to "the coast" to pick up the fish tank yesterday. I decided to upgrade to a bigger size and it took a loooong time for four kids to decide on new fish, plants etc etc. Well we left the shop somewhat less flush than when we entered but with well stocked aquarium!!! Then we headed to Coles to do the grocery shop. Man.... Coles decided to rearrange their aisles and the whole shop was in a state of pandemonium. We had to bring the fish we had bought with us grocery shopping so they didn't fry in the car... Finn had to carry the fish of course and yes, you can imagine what happened. He lost them!!! ($30 worth of the little loves!!!) We searched high and low with Finn in hysterics and me not really dealing well with the situation (think late night shopping, lost fish, cranky kids and me on CLOMID!!!! ARGGGHHHHH) Then there was an announcement over the speaker. "Would the owner of a plastic bag of fish come to the service desk please". Well unless there was another out of their mind mother in the shop it had to be our fish! Finn was so excited and I was relieved! We left again less flush but with a well stocked pantry!
I even squeezed in a visit to get myself a couple of new tops. YIPPPEEE!!!

Today I had a meeting that went on and on and was one of those frustrating cerebral occassions and everything was just ANNOYING me.
The fence is Almost finished but we have a gate and the post and rail is done just the wiring to go on Monday (but of course if there is the slightest drop of rain they won't come!!!!). So, our "girls" (chooks) can't come out of their coop yet. Never mind. Lucy told them this afternoon they only have 3 more sleeps left until they come out!

I just talked to DH and he is tired and says it is really really cold and windy over there at the moment.
Well last dose of clomid tonight. I ordered my ovulation tests from Lullaby and I am poised and waiting for take off!!!!! I am looking forward to getting into the garden on the weekend - I just hope the rain eases off a bit. I want some sun!
Nighty night gorgeous ones...

Deb, that sounds like one hectic day! Poor little Finn, thank god someone was kind enough to hand them in - alot of people would have just taken off with them. Is DH due back in time for you know what this month? It must be so hard having him away so often.

The last HPT I did was on Sunday morning and AF showed that night. I would truly love to think that it was possible I was UTD but the bleeding in those couple of days was just far too heavy to be implantation bleeding. I dont know what is happening - DH says maybe its stress, but I think everyone has stress!

Have a nice sleep, and I hope you dont get woken up too early.

Mel, it sounds like your period was heavy and clotty. Maybe it just got it over with nice and quick and that's the last you will see for a looooong time. I hope so :hugs:
Yes, I am cd14 on Wednesday and DH arrives back at 930am! I haven't ovulated on cd14 in my entire life so I am sure he will be back in plenty of time! I usually ovulate around cd17-19 and have ovulated later on clomid. It does get hard having him away. I actually enjoy it when he is gone a couple of nights. It is a bit of just me time at night. I like that sometimes. But 10 days is a long time for us both and for the kids. They miss their Daddy and so do I! :cryinglaugh:

It is absolutely bucketing down here at the moment. I have the cat sitting on my knee (Pat(rick) the siamese cat) and Doug our black labrador(sp) is knocking the gate to our deck as he wants to come on to the deck (he is not allowed as he rolls in cow poo and he smells!!!). The animals don't like the rain - there is lightning and thunder too and they get spooked I think.:( I know so many many people would give their right arm for the rain we get up here but I just want a little break for a few days! I went to Bunnings on the way home last night and got a few plants to plant out on the weekend - I NEED some SUN!!!!
Night night Mel :hug:

Flowerchild: LMAO about your shopping trip. I am sure it wasn't funny at the time but I can just imagine how confused the other shoppers were when they heard over the loud speaker "could the owner of the fish in the bag come to the front desk" I am glad that DH will be back in time for O. I know how hard it is being away from our loved ones. When DH comes home I feel instantly at ease but as soon as he goes I feel on edge. I just can't wait until June when he will be home for good (well for a while at least)

Mel: Perhaps you did just have a short period if it was really heavy and clotty. I can't remember if you had the hysterography (sp) this month, but perhaps it has something to do with it. Just a thought. I know today is going to be a tough one for you, but Nicholas is going to be so happy to be home with Mummy and Daddy, plant a big sloppy kiss on him from Aunty Spring.

Lynn: How are you today honey? I will email you later about my scan on Tuesday. You are such a doll for coming with me. DH and I are more grateful then I can explain.

Dream: Your son sound like such a sweetie. It is gorgeous that he wants to sleep in your bed when dad is away. What a darling, you must be very proud. I hope that your Grandmother is doing ok and that you get a chance to spend some cherished time with her. Big :hug:

Bailey: Hey sweetie, did you managed to get your little boy off to bed without too much drama? I can't wait to be the mother of an earth baby. Being a mother just sounds like such a rewarding experience.

Well today is the big 12 weeks. I feel like it is another hurdle over, but as you said Mel, it is not the 'safe' time like most woman think. I have my NT scan on Tuesday and after it goes fantastically well, I am going to tell a few people. I am only going to tell my Mum and Dad, one of my sisters and my best friend. I want to try to keep it to myself until after my 19week scan. I don't think I will be able to hide it that long from work, but as most of my friends and family live interstate, unless they can see down the phone, I should be able to manage it. I am really nervous about telling them. I have no reason to be but I don't like keeping secrets so I feel a little guilty that I have. I am sure my Mum and Dad will be over the moon, my big sister will sob (she is a big cryer) with happiness and my best friend will be happy but astounded that I have kept a secret so well. I am usually hopeless at keeping secrets (that is unless they are really important) So tuesday night it is. Any tips on how to tell the fam? I have been so emotional that I am worried I will just cry my way through it. I have to do it over the phone, but I know that I will be asking my sister to sit down first otherwise she might faint (lol)

Anyway, I'll pop in later. Going to make DH and I a free range egg omlette for breaky. Then off to help DH with the gardening and get on top of all this housework :(

Big Love
Spring

Hi Girls,

Deb Your shopping trip sounds very funny.....I can just picture it all I know it probley wasnt at the time but at least you can look back and laugh, how are the poor fish after there big adventure? more to the point have you recovered? I hope it stops raining long enough to plant your plants.

Spring Thanks for your nice words, he is a sweetie, and it wont be very long before you are an earth mummy. Im going to take DS over to GN on Tue, all the family (her children) are going to be there this weekend and I think it may be a little to much for everyone! so I will go when its just the three of us. Yum omlette whats your address!!!! Enjoy your weekend with DH and dont over do the housework.

Mel Thinking of you today.


Lynn and Bailey Hope your both well.

Oh yeah are we catching up? when and where I cheeked the other thread and not sure if it was this sunday or 21st yes call me blonde but ........

We have a weekend with not to much on thank goodness, soccer trials tomorrow moning then just take it nice and slow for a change. Hope you all have a good day.
Luv Nat xxx

:happyforyou: YIPPPPEEEE Spring 12 weeks today!!!!!!! Another 25 weeks and you are considered full term that's only 25 weekends!!!!

Thanks Dream and Flowerchild.

Well I have just spent the last hour or so on the phone to a Doula who Kelly (BB Owner) referred me to.

I cried the entire time and it was so hard to talk about everything she wanted to discuss. She was very empowering though, and discussed with me birth debriefing and hypno birthing. I am going to meet with her next weekend, I feel confident with her that she is going to help get DH and I through this and Lil Spring will be here safe and sound. I just feel so dranined, that conversation was very powerful and even after speaking to her for an hour, I feel a little more clear about what I can acheive as a woman and what I am letting fear do to my confidence.

I almost feel like I need a sleep. You know when you are a kid and you cry so hard you cry yourself to sleep? That is how I feel. Oh well, as the doula said, she will help me re-write my memories to positive ones and that this pregnancy as well as birth is a healing process not a fear ridden experience. She even said that she can help me get excited about this birth. Well we will see about that :rolleyes:

Back later alligators. Got to hang out the sheets and clean the bathroom. Fun hey?

Sorry to Hog the thread today but I wanted to ask some advice.

Well DH and I were just discussing telling the family about Lil Spring after my 12 week scan on Tuesday. He wants me to wait until the weekend so that we can tell everyone together which I will do because I respect that he wants to do it together.

The issue that we disagree on is who to tell. I only want to tell my Mum, Dad, Big sister and best friend. DH thinks that it is only right to tell his parents (who have spilt up and remarried) also. Sounds easy enough, but I have some major issues with my MIL. She did a number of things around the time of Harrison's birth which I still can't forgive her for. For example, ringing us up and telling us that she couldn't come to the funeral because it was too difficult to organise flights, accomodation and work WTF!!! This is your grandson. Also telling me that it was God's way WTF again, and not respecting other wishes that we had on the day of the funeral that I won't go into. The other thing that really disappoints and angers me is that it has been over 5 months since I lost Harry, and I have spoken to her ONCE! That is it. She called before christmas to ask us to go to Melbourne for Christmas and I said no, that we wanted to stay home and that it was a time of grief, not celebration. Since then nothing. DH said that she has absolutely no idea how angry I am with her and to tell her. But to be honest I couldn't be bothered going through the drama of telling her and dealing with that stress. She never calls, DH usually calls her. Now my FIL is differen't he has called regularly since DH has been away and I have a really good relationship with my Step MIL and can talk to her about anything. She has been wonderful support.

So what should we do? DH's opinion is, if we are going to tell your parents, it is only fair to tell his also. But I think I would rather keep Lil Spring a secret from everyone, until the 19 week scan, then have to tell my MIL. I guarantee she will say something stupid like "that was quick" or "lets hope it works this time". I don't usually hold grudges, but I feel protective of Harry, DH and Lil Spring and I just don't want her to know.

At the same time I want to respect DH and the fact that she is his mother.

I know I have gone on and on but any suggestions?

Big love

Spring.

Dear Spring

This is not an easy one, but I do have to agree if you tell one set of parents its hard not to tell the other. May be you can tell yourside of the family and FIL and stepMIL and let DH to his mum, that way he can break the ice and filter any "comments" that she may have.

I know how very special this time is for you and you only want positive thoughts and wishes......Im not to sure if this is any good maybe the other girls have a better idea but its hard not to upset our other halfs. Great news on finding your Doula, sometime it is just so good to cry like that a bit like a great rainfall after months of nothing it cleans everything out and makes it feel new again. You are a strong women who now can achive anything you want, Harrison has helped you be able to do that, you just have to listen to your innerself and go with it....I know very deep but I think we are all such amazing women who need to be tolds that a little more.

As to the washing, it must be the weather I did all our beds today, so did one of my girlfriends! I cant wait to get into bed tonight.....nothing like fresh sheets and clean PJ but it also means no ... btween the sheets, I always tell DH this, I like to feel nice and clean for the first night! Im not sur if I helped but I hope you can come to a decision that makes both of you happy.

Congrates on 12weeks today!!!!!!!!:clap:
Luv Nat

To all the girls

well so much for my relaxing weekend I had to go into the office and do work WTF, do these people not know how much I hate that!!! but I did get out of having to vaccum, go down to the beach and get the soccer boots, work was not that bad much easier then being at home cleaning the bathroom and running around. Thats what I told my DH and im sticking to it.

We are out for dinner tonight and then hopeful taking it easier tomorow. I hope you all have a wonderful weekend with loved ones, rest up and be safe.

Luv Nat xxxx

Thanks for your advice Dream, you are right about one in all in, but I just don't want her to know. DH and I talked about it a bit more and I said 'if we told your Mum, do you believe she would not tell the rest of the family until at least 19 weeks?" and he said that he didn't trust her to keep quiet. That makes me even more cautious of telling her. I would be so angry if yet again she didn't respect our wishes.

Oh well, I am not going to complain too much, it is a good problem to have. I hope work wasn't too full on. I know what you mean about clean sheets. I love washing the sheets and the towels and a hot shower, clean PJ's and then to bed. It is the ultimate recipie for a good nights sleep.

off to organise dinner but I'll pop in later.

Luv Spring