We have been invited to a cousin's wedding interstate and DS will be 4 months at the time. He's both a breast and bottle fed baby (supply issues, but breast feeding is very important to us). I just assumed that he would be coming with us to the ceremony and reception and so i RSVPed for us. But now I've heard through the bride's mother that DS isn't welcome at the reception. I'm not willing to leave DS with anyone except closest family and given that it's interstate that's not an option. So I assume that I will have to not go the reception and sit in a hotel room somewhere, while DH and his family go to the reception.
Was I wrong to assume that 4 month old could come with us? Does the bride think that I would just leave a 4 month old with a hired babysitter?
Now DH and I are kinda thinking, why are we travelling interstate for this wedding if I can only go to half of it and will miss out on some of the fun and some of the catching up with rellies? We will still probably go, but I'll now have to un-RSVP for me to the reception.
I don't see a problem with a 4 mth old at a wedding reception.
Some brides seem to get caught up with making the day 'perfect' that they can't see reason. Perhaps you could speak directly to the bride and tell ehr your reasoning behind taking your DS?
That's just silly that she would have a problem, we didn't have children at our wedding reception....but that's children that take up a seat etc. If someone had a little baby then no prob at all, what trouble is a 4month old going to cause?!?!
I would speak to her about it, really I can't see the problem & I must say you are a being very good about it.........I wouldn't travel for it if that was the case.
We had two weddings DD was 6 1/2 months at the time (4 1/2 corrected), we were BF'ing and both weddings she went to, one, we didn't take her to the Ceremony and when we got there they asked where she was
But we were worried she might cry during the ceremony and after a cousins baby did it at our wedding and for half the ceremony on the video you can hear DA DA DA DA.... we didn't want to do it to someone else. The other wedding she came to both and was perfect I BF'ed her in the church minutes before the Ceremony, so I knew she had a full belly
When they at that age they usually feed play sleep, DD slept well at both ceremonies and we just made sure she wasn't overstimulated with too much attention
I would explain your situation, we did to one wedding as she wasn't on the invite but they were like oh no that is wonderful, no problems
I hope it works out and you all get to go
xxoo
I had a similar issue earlier this year - was invited to a friends wedding interstate, DD#2 was only 5mths old and coming with me as she was exclusively bf (I left DD#1 & DH at home!)
After Id booked etc I find out that they had told everyone "no children". I spoke to my friend (the bride) and told her that DD would have to come with me, simple as that - and she was fine with it. I did feel really awkward though!
I would never put a baby under the age of 6mths in the "child" category! I would always assume them to be welcome, but thats me
I hope things get worked out for you
There is no issue with a 4 month old being at a wedding reception. I would speak to the bride directly, it could have been said in passing at a "bridezilla" moment, especially since you are making the effort and travelling interstate.
When we got married earlier this year it was a definate no children for us at the reception but we considered that from about 2 years & up.
My DH's rellies had to travel from interstate one with an 18 month old and the other with a 12 week old and there was no way that I would have even considered saying they had to pay a sitter or couldn't bring them to the reception.
I'd speak to the bride herself. & I personally don't think I'd go if they're going to be like that.
When DD1 was 5 months old I took her too my uncles wedding & reception even though children weren't invited.
His poor wife got a shock at my wedding, lol...bring the kids! The more the merrier! Let them all be feral together!!
To say we'd prefer no kids is one thing, but 'not welcome'? They should be taking into account the age of your DS & the fact that you have to travel so far. He's not exactly a toddler whose going to be running around sticking his fingers in the cake & skolling everyones drinks!!
I would speak to the bride or groom (whoever is your cousin) and tell them that travelling interstate, you won't be able to have DS babysat, and that he will have to come with you. If they can't accept that, then honestly, I wouldn't be going at all. No matter how old the child, if they want you to travel from another state, what do they expect you to do with the child?
the same thing happened to me at my cousins wedding...Ds was fully bf and all of my family was at the wedding so I didnt have a babysitter anyway..i just rang the bride and she said it would be fine...they didnt want kids there as the church part was important and they didnt want screaming kids around...not that any of the kids screamed. Ds was soo quiet you wouldnt have evcen known he was there and he slept the longest he ever had at the reception so it didnt matter.
If you dont feel comfortable going then dont i am sure the family would understand..plus 4 months is still a tiny bubba aho needs his mummy
I hate to be the negative one in all this... but we did this at our wedding - which was not interstate. We didnt invite children, and we had friends that RSVPed with their child's name. We told them that we would prefer they didnt bring the baby.
This had nothing to do with cost... it was simply because we hadnt invited kids that were a lot closer to us than them and their child, and we didnt want others to get offended when they saw their child there. They told us they werent comfortable leaving their 5 month old with a babysitter so they came to the church only and not the reception.
P.s. A few weekends earlier we found out they went to the AFL grand final together and left the baby with their grandmother...
4 month old at wedding reception
But now I've heard through the bride's mother that DS isn't welcome at the reception. I'm not willing to leave DS with anyone except closest family and given that it's interstate that's not an option. So I assume that I will have to not go the reception and sit in a hotel room somewhere, while DH and his family go to the reception.
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I BF'ed her in the church minutes before the Ceremony, so I knew she had a full belly 
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