Help me choose my bridesmaid... and more wedding stuff *long*

[*Ang*]

Is it obligatory to invite partners of the bridal party?

It may not be the answer that you want to hear, but if they have been together for a while (say more then 3 months) then the answer to that would be Yes. In fact I would find it quite rude if I was a member of a bridal party and my partner was not invited.

Alternatively I could use his sister, he could use his brother as a GM but then my brothers will be left out.

To me this would be the best solution, especially if you get on reasonably well with your future SIL. As to your brothers missing out, if you explain to them that by having the flowergirls you are incorporating "your side" surely they would understand? They could be included in another way, ushers at the ceremony, handing out order of service booklets at the ceremony or doing a reading.

[mum3girls]

Hey hun.

Honestly, I'd go with number 4. You need to surround yourself with people who will be nothing but supportive and make you smile on your big day. I'll PM you later to elaborate Don't include people because someone else wants you to, do it because they are someone that you want to share a special part of a very special day with.

Secondly, unfortunately (financially wise), yeah I do think it would be a bit rude not to invite partners of your bridal party. I don't know what to suggest for deciding who to include on the invite list, and who not to - but in all honesty, looking back on our wedding, there's a little part of me that wishes that we had eloped. Made it just about DH, me and the girls. Which makes me quite sad, I was just looking at our wedding photos last night, and felt really disappointed that I feel that way, but I do.

So, to sum up my little rant there you and your men (DF and little Mr A.) are the most important people on your wedding day, and I really hope you are able to make decisions based solely on what will make you guys happy, not pleasing other people.

[BeautifulMadness]

CM i am so glsd i am not in ur postion lol planning my wedding in 2 mths was a nightmare and i was 3 mths gone ( i had to choose food while i had m/s lol) i did my wedding on a budget of 4,000.
u have whoever u want at ur wedding and in ur wedding party. I know id be annoyed if my DH was invited and i wasnt.
mum3girls....lol @ eloping....i wish i had too lol

[Lukesmum]

My husband was invited to a wedding and I wasn't on the invite. At the time I thought it was incredibly rude but now I think they just had to cut numbers and I hadn't even met them so now that I have met them there is no hard feelings there and they are really nice people. I think bridal party partners should definately be invited because they are the partners of your closest friends

[Karina]

I wasnt really keen on having a massive bridal party, so I had one bridesmaid (my sister) and DH had a best man.

I chose my sister because she's awesome. It all worked out well and we had fun choosing dresses and stuff.

DH chose his best man because he wanted to get to know this guy better. It didnt work - they are just way too different to each other and the guy was not really connected to our wedding and as such didnt really help DH out with much. I remember for his bucks night, the best man invited DH over to his house (a fair drive from us) and bought heaps of beer and other alcohol (DH doesnt drink. at all. which the guy knew) and played poker all night (DH hates poker.. also something the guy was aware of), so the whole thing just annoyed DH no end.

I really didnt want a big wedding, so it wasnt too hard for me to "thin the flock' with my guests. We ended up having about 60 people. DH and I both wrote down a list of people we'd like to come. Then DHs parents wanted all their friends to come too. So we ended up having more people than I had hoped for but I wasnt going to be the one to say they couldnt come. We ended up having our parents, siblings (3 sublings for each of us) and we invited partners of them too (4 of them brought partners or a friend), aunties, uncles, DH's nanna (my nanna's health had gone downhill shortly before and she was unable to travel, and my other grandparents had passed away), a few friends of ours, my parents invited 2 friends, a friend from my school came, and then a bunch of DH's parents friends (i didnt even know these people!). We also invited kids as well. We had 6 (or was it 8?) kids there. I remember my mum telling to invite so-and-so and I was thinking - ok neither of us have seen them in like 5 years and I woudlnt know them from a bar of soap if I bumped into them on the street.. and I felt wierd about inviting people I didnt really know.. iykwim.

I think if my DH was invited to someones wedding I'd get a bit annoyed if I wasnt invited too. It doesnt necessarily mean I want to go, but its more the principle of it. I dont know what it is, but yeah I'd be annoyed if I wasnt invited. And likewise, I think I'd feel funny if I was invited to wedding and DH was not...