How long were you.....???

[Nelle]

Try not to worry. It will work if they both are committed to making it work.

We were engaged after 8 months (he was 20 I was 19), married 7 months after that (he was 21 I was 20) - we didn't live together before marriage, and in February it'll be six years! So we've been together for seven. And no sign of trouble, apart from the fact that he STILL doesn't empty the dirty laundry basket.

As I said at the start, if they work at it, they should be fine. We've done marriage courses, try to go on dates, try to have good quality time and aim to be unselfish - and I think that is more relevant to a relationship's success than the length of the lead-up. xo

ETA: Dedicated Mummy, that's not necessarily true about marriage without living together first creating problems. xo

[BrightSparkles]

:
We were engaged after 8 months (he was 20 I was 19), married 7 months after that (he was 21 I was 20) - we didn't live together before marriage, and in February it'll be six years! So we've been together for seven. And no sign of trouble, apart from the fact that he STILL doesn't empty the dirty laundry basket.

ROFL - my DH is the same!! LOL

[[M]umma[M]ia]

DF and i moved in together, i was 16, he was 19 and we had ben together about 2months. We JUST got enaged this christmas after almost 6 years together and couldnt be happier

[*Nikki*]

Well DF and i are not married yet (will be in 2 months time tho ... we will have been together for abit over 5.5 years... We have only been engaged for 4 months (took him forever to ask me lol)

[MistyFying]

I met DH when I was 17 and he was 18. He asked me to marry him on our first date. I declined, but agreed to keep dating He proposed when he was 21 and I was 20, and we were married a year after that. We've now been married for 17 years.

Like Nelle, we didn't live together before we were married. We think the "success" (for want of a better word) of marriage preparation lies in discussing values, communication and conflict styles, default positions (ie what you've been brought up with), expectations etc, rather than test-running living arrangements. In my opinion, if you can't work out the other stuff, then nothing will make the living arrangements work out.

[Sterla]

DH and I got together when we were 13, so keep this in mind .

DH and were together for a bit over 2 years before we moved in together - however, when I say moving in, I moved in with DH and his mum and brother when I was 16 so that I could do year 11 at a half-decent college. In Year 12 I moved out on my own with a friend though. A year after that DH and I moved in together again, this time sharing with a friend. It was while we were living here that we got engaged - we were 18. While we were engaged we finally moved in together by ourselves.
A year and a half later we got married - we were 19 (I turned 20 the day after). So, we were together for 6.5 years before getting married - and we've now been married for over 4 years .

[Trillian]

We met in March 97, engaged in January 99 and married the following year in April. We've been together 13 years next march. We didn't live together till about 3 months before we were married. I know couples who have been together for years and years and split as soon as the ink on the marriage certificate was dry and know other couples who met and were married within the first year. It's not the length of time that you are together for before you get married, but how committed you are to each other and how committed you are to making it work. I'm sure that your friends know what they are doing and it is their mistake to make if it doesn't work outin the end kwim?

[feeb]

Met and got together April 2000 ( I was 21 he was 25)
Broke up Feb 2001 (didnt speak or have any contact)
Till June 2002 got together
I moved in September 2002
Engaged Feb 2005
Married May 2006

So together 7 and 1/2 years

[Laranna]

XH - I was 18, he was 21 when we met and started dating. I was 22, he 25 when we got engaged and then moved out together. We were both still living with our parents then. Took us another 3 years to actually get married and then 2 years to get divorced.

DH - we have been friends for 14 years now but both being in other relationships we never considered each other as partners. We actually started dating in Dec 05, a few months after XH & I broke up. I was resisting because I felt it was too soon after my break up, but couldn't resist and knew it was right. We were inseparable from then and he moved in with me 3 months later and fell pregnant 4 months after that. We got engaged in March this year and married in August. So we've been together just on 4 years all up. It has been the best 4 years of my life We are soul mates.

[Doing my best]

We got together Nov 00, moved in Feb 01, asked me to marry him in Mar 01 but we didn't tell anyone till we had the ring in July 01. Married Sept 03.

So been together 9 years, married for 6 and engaged for 2.

[*TripleJ*]

April 2008 Met Started Dating Asked me to marry him 2 weeks after we met
May 2008 I moved in to his Place
August 2008 I turned 21 and got Preg with DS
December 2008 We got married
Now been together 20 months

[Traveller]

DH and I met when I was 16. It took him almost 2 years before be succumbed to my charms and we never spent a night apart from 3 months together. Decided not to waste rent money so moved in together after 6 months and got engaged a year later, married 6 months after that.

We have now been together for 10 years and married for 8. During that time we have emigrated twice, had 4 children, and are about to emigrate for the 3rd time. He is my rock, I could not imagine how my life would have turned out without him in it. (just don't tell him that)

[*LittleMissSummer*]

I havent read all of the responses but some of them are wonderful and dont make me feel so bad about mine, well i dont feel bad but people always commented.

I started going out with Dp when i was 15 (he was 21) he proposed to me on our 10 months anniversary so i was almost 17. We didnt make it official until i was 18 (so didnt tell my mum or my grandparents until then) we lived with each other on and off because of problems with our families (my mum kicked me out, then his mum kicked him out.... we moved back with our mums.. ahh confusing!!) but we didnt move in together properly until May this year (together almost 5 years) and our first bubba is due a month before our 6 year anniversary. We have no set date for our wedding but im not worried as we will get married when it suits us not everyone around us.

But i have to laugh at the people who say i have rushed into everything. I met him when i was 15 we moved in together properly when i was 20 and found out i was pregnant 2 weeks before my 21st.

But it was weird from the moment i met him i knew i would be with him always.

[Dansta]

a lot of these stories are sooo romantic!

end of '05 DH and I met (I was 16 he was 26. and met when i worked at a subway )
Feb '06 started dateing
June '07 i moved in with DH
Feb '08 got engaged (on our 2year anna)
apirl '08 we found out i was UTD
Nov. 27th 2008 we got married.
Feb.7th DJ was born.
and now we're expecting #2!
we've had ups and downs. we've had alot of people tell us it wouldnt work becuase of the age gap, plus meeting when i was so 'young' didnt help. but he's may support my main man. and i dont know what i'd be like with out him. all i know is he'd still be having 2min noodles with frozen veggies for dinner

[UntoldAngel]

Moved into a house together after 7 months (although practically inseparable before that), engaged at 8years... we've been together 8.5years now
He was a little slow realising that I was the one he wanted to commit to

[ElleJay]

XF - Got together Aug 2002, he proposed sometime in the 2nd half of 2003 - we never set a date for the wedding and everyone asked us when we were planning.. Well, for some reason, in my bones, I just couldn't set a date or plan anything.. We broke up so many times during the relationship that I think that's what did it. We broke up for good Dec 2005.

DH - Started talking online Feb 2006. I didn't like him at first and thought he was one of those people that was just trying to chat me up (we met on MySpace when that was the big thing) because of the private message he'd sent (still have it to this day!) I decided to ignore his message because of the above reason but kinda talked to him once every few days, not often though.. It wasn't till April 2006 (my birthday) that I talked to him more - I remember grilling him as to why he didn't say happy birthday to me.
Anyways, first met up in May 2006 (it was a couple weeks after my 21st birthday) and had a crush on him from the beginning
Kept meeting up during school holidays, though he went away for one of them - the first lot (hence the reason for him not wishing me a happy birthday)
Started meeting up quite a bit.
August 22nd 2006, he asked me to be his girlfriend
Moved in Dec 2006 to my (now) ILs house
BFP on June 27th 2007, lost the bub June 29th 2007
Proposed July 29th 2007
Got married January 10th 2009 - and just bout the celebrate our first anniversary!
Found out I was pg 3rd Feb 2009
DS was born 21st Oct 2009
So, we've been together a total of 3 and a half yrs

[LimeSlice]

DH and I have been together since March 2002...engaged June 2007, had DD November 2007 and married October 2008.

So all up we were together 6.5 years before we got married, and been married now for just over a year - 8 years together coming up!

ETA: Having said that though, we were practically living together within 6 months and physically living together within 12 months...I knew I would spend the rest of my life with him in weeks, and our relationship has morphed so many times now I can barely keep up lol So wish your friends joy and happiness and let them work out the logistics

[JennaJayen]

DH and I met online (ironically both of us had decided to give dating in general one last and final chance!) in Nov 07... first date Nov 26th 07, I moved in March 08, found out I was preg with DS April 8th 08, got engaged 3 weeks later, bought our first house September 12th 08, DS was born Dec 23rd 08... and we just got married on Jan 16th 09... so we've almost hit 26 months together now We only had a $2,000 wedding too, beach weddings rock!