What is a ****tail reception and how to go about it?

[The[cookie]Doctor]

Well.... after three months off we're back to the planning stages but I have no idea where to start. I have so many questions, and honestly no idea. So, expect many questions from me in these forums...

So, firstly, what exactly is a ****tail reception? How do we go about it? What's the average cost per head? I really need step by step guidance as I have no help from family and I'll be doing it by myself...

Do you think a cocoktail reception is too informal following a church wedding? Does it need a 'theme' per se... Gosh, help!!!!

[Visitor7]

You need to do what suits you both. A ****tail reception would usually be a standing occassion. Ladies wearing ****tail dress, men in dinner suits, or formal wear. Hot finger food and champagne on offer.
There's some great wedding forums out there, 1 do dot com & wedding central.

[sneakysparkle]

I think ****tail receptions are becoming more and more popular - they are a great option and will work fine after a church wedding!
It is a little less formal (not being a sit-down three course doo) but you can still have the formalities of the evening (speeches, etc) basically its up to you!
Cost can vary widely depending on where you go so it pays to do some research.
All the best darl - its very exciting!

[The[cookie]Doctor]

Well I was thinkiong a ****tail reception would be good, cost wise. I guess being less formal it suits 'us' and as for the church wedding, well ive wanted to get married at this church since I was five, not backing down on it now
The thing is I just don't really know where to start. The other thing I was thinking was to hire a hall and get caterers but for the effort involved im sure it would just be easier to do it buffet style at the Sheraton like mum did.

[Snacks]

I think ****tail reception is just fine after a church wedding
Personally, I'd definitely go with a reception venue. It may end up being a little more per head, but I agree that it'd be heaps less effort for you.

[Lucy]

Ashlea,

If you think of all of the venues that are in your area that you think you might like to have your reception at, that are local to the church that you are getting married in, then Goodgle them and see if they have a website. Then hopefully they will have some sample ****tail menus on there with pricing so you can see ballpark figures.

We got married nearly 3 years ago and we did consider hiring a hall and organising catering, but it worked out a LOT more expensive.......all the hire of all the crockerly etc.......nightmare!

I arranged my wedding in Adelaide from Darwin (nightmare!) and I had totally NFI, but we got there in the end, so I empathise!

There is a list of Melbourne venues HERE.

Very best of luck!

[The[cookie]Doctor]

Thanks for that Lucy that's really helpful! You're a gem!

[mrsmac]

We had a simple wedding then a reception in the Novotel in the dining room. They partioned off with plants a section for us and we used the buffet that everyone else was using. It worked out much cheaper for us and i think everyone liked it (Snacks?? Paddywhacks????)

[Snacks]

Was lovely, MrsMac !

[briggsy's girl]

DH and I met at a ****tail reception - it was an absolute fiasco!! the idea is brilliant, but make sure you do it somewhere with a good reputation!!! the location for this one fired their chef a week before the wedding, and the owners took off without organising someone else!!

after experiencing that, we decided we'd do out wedding differently - still informal, but a hell of a lot better. we rang around to get price per plate for catering at local establishments, found out what was included etc. then we rang a couple of "go anywhere" caterers - and OMG - it cost us half as much getting catered that way (buffet spit roast, four meats, salads, vegies, desserts) than what it would have a ****tail reception! we then shopped around for a location that suited us and chose one of the local football/netball clubs. $150 gave us the venue from friday afternoon til sunday morning, bar staff and clean up included. we got to set up on friday night the way we wanted (all in all cost less than $100 with table centrepieces), alcohol was cheaper than normal bar prices, we were able to get a band etc... and it was a fantastic night

i guess why i've waffled is to encourage you to look at all options that are available to you before deciding - if your heart is set on this particular church, then your reception has to fit around it's availability - and expense wise, it might be just as cheap, if not cheaper, to have a relaxed sit down meal... definitely shop around, compare everything, and then decide on what's best for you and DP.

i guess too, the fact you're not sure of what a ****tail reception is, rings in my head that it might not really be "you", so might not be as enjoyable as you want your wedding day to be, kwim??

[The[cookie]Doctor]

then we rang a couple of "go anywhere" caterers - and OMG - it cost us half as much getting catered that way (buffet spit roast, four meats, salads, vegies, desserts) than what it would have a ****tail reception!

ive been finding that just from looking at ****tail prices at venues...

My friend had her 21st in a church hall with catering with twice as many guests (she's italian, big family, lol!)as we'll have at our wedding and catering cost half as much as what we'd be looking at for a ****tail reception...

we're not about fancy food, so catering for roast meat and veges would do me fine! plus, i think all the family could do dessert, dessert is easy / ill be having a mudcake not a fruit cake so that could do too.

and from what it looks like so i guess i really had the wrong idea about what a ****tail reception is and if we did it in a hall maybe a better option for the littlies (they will be invited, i love all my little cousins and wouldnt have them miss out for the world, so i think there'll be at least six toddlers).

It's a pity i hate talking on the phone because looks like thats what im going to have to start doing
Thanks for your advice BG because you're sort of channeling whats been going through my head since i started googling.

[Lulu]

Totally agree with BG!

Look around for different caterers. I was horrified to see I had to hire plates, forks etc AS WELL as the catering.
Then I found one that did it all, they provided great references and the food was so good they got heaps more work out of it. They also provided bar/wait staff. The price was far, far cheaper than some. Be careful of REALLY cheap though.

With a ****tail reception you gotta be careful. There never, ever, ever seems to be enough food for everyone for a start .
You will have to think about the time you get married because you cant have people waiting too long in between the ceremony and the reception. You also cant have them starve.

[Aimz]

I think a ****tail reception is fine after a church wedding. It is also a more cost effective option compared to a sit down 3 course meal.

We had both at our wedding. Our ceremony was held at sunset and was held on a terrace of a hotel which had amazing views. We didn't want to rush our guests off to the restaurant and miss the sunset so after the ceremony we held a ****tail reception.

The reception included live music, canapes (finger food - lots of it) and plenty of champage. It's a great way for guests to mingle as they will be standing for the majority of it (I would include some seating for those who get sore feet from dancing!). So that it stays formal after the church service, I would write on the invitations "Formal ****tail Reception". This will indicate to guests that the need to wear dresses and suits.

The cost will vary depending on your venue and your caterers. You will probably pay anywhere from $15-$40 per head for the finger food depending on how many guests you have and your chosen selections. Also depending on how many guests you have, your alcohol costs will vary. At functions that I organise for work I usually allow $1000 per 50 people for a 4 hour event so if you use that as a rough guide then you should be ok. That is for beer and wine only. Allow about 10% on top of that just in case you go over.

Happy to help in whatever way I can - this is what I do every day at work as I organise all of the meetings, functions and events!! Plus I'm fresh out of just pulling off my own wedding!

[briggsy's girl]

hun, if you want help with suggestions, let me know - i'm not "local" to you - but i'm pretty sure you don't have to be physically local to help out! i found our caterers by "accident", and honestly, it was just through white page searches!

lulu is right - make sure you find a caterer that includes everything - ours did all the main course, basic dessert (fruit salad and pav, as we had mud cup cakes for wedding cake) for $18 per adult, $10 per child over 3 and under 12. They also had girls for serving, collecting all the plates and clean up, EVERYTHING that was left over was put in containers for us (we just had to supply containers and esky to put them in at end of the night), the helped with distributing the wedding cup cakes to everyone, and worked with the bar staff to make sure we were all looked after. once all guests were fed, we asked that they feed themselves and the bar staff as well. our wedding, for 110 people, including all but top shelf drinks (well, we paid for DH, bro and best man, so still a fair whack), cost us $2750 (and $300 of that was a donation to the netball girls that manned the bar as we didn't even go through $1000 in grog for the night - told them to tak\e it as a donation rather than trying to refund what we'd already paid!)

i also think if you do your reception at a more relaxed location (like the hall you mentioned), you can decorate for much less - and exactly how you want. we didn't want to go overboard (country bumpkins at heart here!) so we had a simple table centrepiece, and place cards made to match our invitations - loved it then, and nothing i can think of now that i'd change!!! i made our invites (and loved doing it) - and ended up making invites for two other weddings cos people were so impressed with them!

[mrsmac]

A friend of mine hired my DD and a few of her friends (they were 15) to "waitress" which kept costs down too, she just gave them $50 at the end each.
Spit roasts are very economical you'll find too. We did our Yr 6 farewell for about $15 a head which was 2 courses and a bread roll.

[The[cookie]Doctor]

Thanks for all your help, it's all greatly appreciated!! I had a look in the phone book last night for ideas and found a franchise catering company that might be okay, but im not sure, might have to post about them. Anyway, it's less than $30 a head for the wedding banquet pack, they bring all the stuff with them, they help clean up, provide the waiters etc... Just worried that if they're a franchise they might not be that reputable? I dont know. Anyway its a spit one, and they give you choice of three meats and then seven salad/vege choices, four desserts, tea & coffee. They'll help with the cake and you can keep the leftovers. Sounds perfect... now what...

[Aimz]

Just a thought - some venues have caterers that are exclusive to them - i.e. if you book that particular venue then you have to go with their caterers. It's worth asking when you decide on a venue.

[Lulu]

Ask them for references hun, it should not be a problem.

FWIW, I found hiring a hall was the best thing ever. I had a band (much cheaper that you think) and they wouldnt attend if the venue was a reception centre. Apparently there are lots of rules on the setup times etc. We could let them come in whenever they felt like it...