SG - the others have said it so well. You have made a difficult decision and it may take a while before you feel better about it. Take care of yourself - as they were never going to. Can you do something nice today - just a short walk or a nice cuppa out with DH/friend so you can get your mind off it? xxx
Well done to you for standing up for yourself. I'm sorry they were so toxic you were driven to try to hurt yourself and thankfully your DH is there taking care of you. Have you had counselling for self-harm before? If not, it may help to give you more coping skills for when you're feeling vulnerable.
I was once in a job for about 18 months. I was early 20's, with little self-confidence. I worked my butt off for this small family business, researching and creating advertising programs, driving around the country signing people up, working long hours. Nearly fell asleep driving. I was so depressed, I thought I was unemployable. One day I had a long lunch, after spending 3 weeks on the road for 6 day weeks. My boss reemed out for it and I blamed myself for being a bad worker. It wasn't until I talked to a recruitment consultant about my CV & experience that I realised I WAS employable and I went back to work and quit.
No job, company or work colleague is worth your health. I imagine if it was your DH in your place, you'd be giving him the same advice he gave you - it's NOT your fault.
Let go about the audit - they created this mess. It's not your problem. And you will get another job - you'll just know faster in future to get out if it's toxic.
Aww shucks gals, I'm overwhelmed I didn't realise so many people noticed me!
WRT the self harm - Yes, I used to go to counselling for it, about 10 years ago. TBH, it's not something I normally consider doing, even when I'm depressed. I have learned other coping methods, but in this case, I just didn't know how to get myself out of the situation I guess. The acupuncture I've been getting for fertility has also treated my anxiety/depression, but because I had to stop when I was made redundant, I've gone a bit backwards. Everything will start looking up soon!
UPDATE: My agency rep called me yesterday and offered me another job! It's only 2 or 3 days work though, but I feel more comfortable with that at the moment. $26 per hour! So obviously you were all right, I haven't been blacklisted
My exit interview was sent through to the other workplace, and apparently it has inspired the WA Manager to have a meeting with all the department heads to discuss the internal politics! They've had trouble keeping staff for a while now, but never knew why - because of the info I gave them, the manager's asked a couple of others, who have agreed with what I've said, so he's determined to change it! I can't believe it
Thank you so much for all your support ladies, it means the world to me
I had a feeling it would all work out. I'm glad you don't usually feel the need to self harm and I really hope that if you are in a situation where you feel this way again you can come to us xo
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Can you do something nice today - just a short walk or a nice cuppa out with DH/friend so you can get your mind off it? xxx
I didn't realise so many people noticed me!
So obviously you were all right, I haven't been blacklisted
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