oh yeah forgot to comment on the DH thing. mine works full time, longish hours (currently home by 7.30 but it used to be later) and always has work to do at night. he took 8 days off when dd was born - was supposed to be two weeks but he had to go back early. it was not nearly enough time... since then he's taken one day's leave to take ds to the snow. i do all the shopping, cooking, laundry, day-to-day cleaning (not that much gets done) and all the nighttime wakings/feedings/nappy changes - he does the occasional dishwashing and often tidies/cleans on weekend, but he really can't do much more than that because he does ALL the paid work that supports us. i wish i had more help, especially given dd's pathetic half-hour naps, but that's just the way it has to be. fire you are so lucky to have your dh at home! meg yours sounds very helpful too.